Introduction
Parents play an increasingly vital role in today’s more and more complex and dangerous society. At the same time, many are abdicating their responsibility to the state in the form of teachers, law enforcement, and fundamentals including food and healthcare.
Parents are primarily responsible for everything in their children’s lives.
That is the subject of today’s 10-minute blog/podcast.
Continuing
Your role, our unique and exceptional roles in our shared unique and exceptional nation, includes being there for our children, and doing the hard work--the consistent hard work over many years--of raising them. Parents are primarily responsible for everything in their children’s lives. Logistical things like food, clothing, healthcare and transportation. Eduction. Moral development. Physical development. Learning the basics of how to succeed as a person and in the world.
In order to meet this responsibility, parents need to:
Be there. I know that may seem obvious, but with all the missing parents the point, sadly, needs to be made.
Be aware that education is their responsibility. That teachers are coaches are immensely valuable, but the parents have the primary responsibility for their children’s education and mental discipline development.
Be aware that while law enforcement is obviously necessary, they are primarily responsible for developing their children's respect for authority.
Be aware that employers can teach many things that parents can’t, but the parents are the key to instilling a strong work ethic.
Be willing to sacrifice in order to meet these responsibilities.
Much has been said and written about the obligations parents have in a child’s early years. Feeding, diapers, late nights, trundling the offspring everywhere you go. Not finishing a sentence. Spending your money on more things than you thought possible. Losing closeness with your spouse. All of this is hard, and at the same time it looks like some sort of exercise, a monumental exercise that can last for several years, perhaps, but an exercise that you can get through, and then it ends. Not so, by the way.
The harder part, yes there is a harder part, is modeling the correct behavior. Let’s start with reading. Reading is critical; not all readers are leaders, but all leaders are readers. If you want your child to be a reader, you must be one. Have books in the home. Read them. Read to your child, and let them read to you as they develop. Quote from books. Share life lessons you have learned from books. No, not videos--books. Make books come alive, make them fun, make them valuable.
Modeling also includes a strong work ethic, valuing useful education, understanding and demonstrating how money works, and respecting authority. Pause for the obvious: in order to model anything, you must first know how to do it, and then be willing to make it a priority.
Let’s start with understanding and modeling how money works. As with all of life, following a few simple rules will change everything. And, as with all of life, the rules are easy to understand, and very hard to actually follow. It’s that motivation and discipline thing. Here are the rules: 1. Make more than you spend. 2. Spend less than you earn. 3. Never finance anything that depreciates. And, no, the first two rules are not the same.
Let’s pause for a moment for an example of simple to understand, but hard to do. People do know what to do even in difficult situations. The reason they don’t is not lack of knowledge, but lack of sufficient motivation to do the hard tasks that likely lie in front of them. A friend, the most long-term successful health and life coach I know, provides a great example. When I approached Don about losing weight, he asked two questions. The first was,