Takes One to Write One

In this first episode of Takes One to Write One: Cults, Katherine sits down with a guest who bravely shares their experience growing up in a high-control group and their journey to breaking free. Through their anonymous account, we explore what it means to be raised in a cult, the tactics used to maintain control, and the emotional toll of leaving. This conversation is raw, honest, and at times heavy—so please listen with care. Trigger warnings include coercion, trauma, psychological manipulation, spiritual and emotional abuse, and physical assault. Your well-being comes first.

TIMESTAMPS

00:00:27 Trigger Warnings: coercion, trauma, physical assault, psychological manipulation, spiritual abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, self-harm, suicide, and gaslighting.

00:02:05 Did the cult have a name, or was it a cult?

00:04:26 What are your first memories or experiences with being in the organization?

00:06:20 Who was doing the homeschooling?

00:08:40 I imagine in an unfortunate circumstance, you got really good at knowing the Bible verses.

00:09:20 Bible verses for discipline

00:10:51 With these church services, were they the same no matter what day of the week or were they like, it's Monday, so this day is about this?

00:11:55 What's the difference between the kids' service and the adult service?

00:13:40 Could you elaborate more on these responsibilities?

00:16:14 How did your parents get involved?

00:17:37 Matchmaking

00:19:14 The bible taught the Rule of Thumb 

00:20:40 What would you experience in these church services?

00:23:31 Would anybody who's been at a church service be able to find similarities with the church services that you attended?

00:25:09 What was the view with working— having an unrelated job?

00:25:25 Members of the church, what sort of jobs did they have?

00:26:42 Tithing with 10 percent but definitely more 

00:29:44 With these clothes, was it retail stores that you went to? Were they made sewn?

00:30:20 Was there like a uniform, like were there specific things that you needed to wear?

00:31:02 If I were to put a dollar at the top of my knee, the shorts had to be longer than where the dollar ended going up my knee.

00:32:07 Carrying religious traumas 

00:32:56 What was youth group like?

00:35:28 What does one do to become a leader?

00:37:29 So overall, in the grand scheme of things, rather recently, a couple of years ago and I was like, hey, this is a cult, right?

00:39:35 Because one does not simply leave a cult, they just replace it.

00:39:53 What was the difference between the original and now the new or second?

00:40:39 Are these cults still operating?

00:41:06 You mentioned at the church services that people questioned commitment. What was that verbiage like?

00:42:57 Was the pastor who was getting all the money, who was clearly not doing what he was saying he was going to do with the money, was he living a flashier life than the rest of the members?

00:44:58 So, you were with this group, always doing stuff, always keeping busy, studying, doing X, Y, Z. And then you mentioned how isolating it was at the same time. I imagine there wasn't mental health support of, hey, you're feeling this way.

00:46:08 Was there a big presence of Satan?

00:46:57 Let's take a break

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In the second part of this two-part series, Katherine continues her conversation with Todd, a lifer in the motorcycle club world. With 18 years of experience, Todd shares his thoughts on what it means to be a part of a club, the emotional ups and downs that come with the territory, and how the landscape of motorcycle clubs has evolved over time. From the challenges of managing relationships within the club to navigating the perceptions of the wider world, Todd pulls back the curtain on what really happens in the day-to-day life of a seasoned member. Learn about the balance between fear and respect, the importance of community meals, and what the future might look like for motorcycle clubs.

TIMESTAMPS

00:00:51 Are there such things as posers with the guys that have the motorcycles that have like leather jackets, but no patches sort of thing?

00:01:40 What gets you excited about the Motorcycle Club?

00:02:13 Follow up question, what about it drains you?

00:02:55 Can we talk about you being a lifer and what that means?

00:03:28 Would you say that being a part of the club, you get a full range of emotions?

00:04:35 Now, going off with, you know, figuring out the burial and whatnot, would you mind talking a little about how you take on, you know, some responsibilities with that?

00:07:31 There are folk with, you know, criminal records that are perhaps coming back from jail. How’s the reception when they come back?

00:08:42 What do these community meals mean to you?

00:09:38 What foods do you yourself have in your refrigerator?

00:12:14 As far as scents and smells and flavors, what sort of smells and scents and flavors do you associate with the club or with the motorcycle?

00:13:58 If you were to make a candle for your motorcycle club, what fragrances would it have?

00:14:32 How important has your sixth sense been on your journey in this motorcycle club world?

00:16:13 What's something that is perhaps often overlooked or forgotten when it comes to motorcycle clubs?

00:17:02 Do you guys have like a rule book or legislation amongst the club that you have to follow?

00:18:22 What advice do you have for individuals that are aspiring to join a motorcycle club?

00:19:43 If, if somebody were to come up to you while you're, I don't know, at a, not at a club affiliated thing and say, hey, I see that you're part of this, is that something that you would have a conversation or is that just not a time or place?

00:20:24 What's something that you think most people in motorcycle clubs might, like, change about the field?

00:21:25 Once you become a member of a motorcycle club and then you find out maybe it's not for you, is there like, are you allowed to then go to a different club?

00:22:15 You've mentioned that going online, for information about motorcycle clubs, you'll find some stuff that's true and some stuff that's not true, and to recommend going to other clubs, or going to clubs to get more information. Is there anywhere else where people could find information, specifically writers, finding information on motorcycle clubs?

00:23:20 Would you agree that it's like the media and entertainment that vilifies and adds this mystification to it?

00:24:02 Are there things with motorcycle clubs that have gone out of date, or would you see the same sort of stuff happening today that happened in the 50s?

00:25:02 You've been involved with motorcycle clubs for 18 years. What have you seen the most change in?

00:25:44 What sort of tech in a motorcycle has changed?

00:26:55 Speaking about the ladies, how do they love the motorcycle clubs?

00:29:51 Going off of my question about things going out of date, what is something with motorcycle clubs that is perhaps future proof, or it could be 200, 300 years from now, and it will still always be part of the club?

00:32:05 If you read blank, if you read something in a book or saw something on TV regarding motorcycle clubs, what would that thing be where you would know that the writer did their research?

00:34:37 And you've asked me this question before, to which I answered incorrectly and you told me why. Where you asked, is it better to be feared or respected?

00:36:48 You mentioned the fear of getting kicked out. Is that super possible with, like, anything, or does it take lengths to do it?

00:45:50 Do you foresee a time where you'll be unbothered by the government and society and outsiders?

00:47:56 If somebody wasn't in a motorcycle club, they would never believe what.

WEBSITE

https://takesonetowriteone.com/

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In part one of this two-part series, Katherine sits down with Todd, a seasoned member of a long-standing motorcycle club. With years of experience under his belt, Todd shares his unique perspective on the world of motorcycle clubs and their impact on society. From the myths surrounding club life to the realities of maintaining brotherhood, Todd goes into the history, structure, and personal significance of being a club member. He addresses commonly held stereotypes, the importance of club patches and colors, and gives insight into the role of philanthropy in the motorcycle community. Join us for an eye-opening discussion about the real world of motorcycle clubs that you won't see on TV.

TIMESTAMPS

00:01:12 How is it that you got started with the club?

00:02:44 Fact or Fiction

00:03:06 Harley Davidson is the one and only choice for real motorcycle club members.

00:04:12 What does the CC mean?

00:05:07 Motorcycle clubs are only for people who don't fit mainstream society, like ex-convicts, rebels, or troublemakers.

00:06:03 Motorcycle club members are all heavy drinkers and partiers, and that clubs are shown hosting wild parties fueled by booze, drugs, and chaos.

00:07:23 Motorcycle club members are always heavily tattooed, always wear leather jackets and vests and have to look tough.

00:08:52 Motorcycle clubs frequently feud with rival clubs and club wars and turf battles are a constant reality, leading to shootouts and revenge plots.

00:11:47 Motorcycle clubs control small towns and communities, and that motorcycle clubs exert influence over local businesses, law enforcement, and politics as seen on all of these TV shows.

00:14:54 Motorcycle clubs have strict hierarchies and roles.

00:17:07 What makes a motorcycle unsafe?

00:17:36 Women are not allowed to be full-fledged members and that women are depicted as property or mere accessories to male motorcycle club members.

00:21:28 A club patch or colors are considered untouchable and disrespecting them leads to serious consequences.

00:24:32 Timeline of being accepted into a club

00:25:15 History of motorcycle clubs, specifically in Detroit.

00:30:59 Regarding being in the club, how important is observation and attention to detail?

00:33:43 What challenges occur when maintaining a peaceful environment at the clubhouse and what happens when you host other clubs?

00:35:04 How often does your club host other clubs at the clubhouse?

00:35:45 Are there acronyms or code words that you'll see used in other motorcycle clubs or amongst yourselves to communicate?

00:36:32 Resources for writers

00:37:54 Philanthropy with the clubs (and not so much with the government)

00:40:40 Lawyers for the club

00:41:12 Like jewelers have dirty and burned hands, like farmers get wicked tans. Would anything on your body give away that you are in a motorcycle club?

00:42:52 What does this brotherhood mean to you?

00:43:50 In a lot of media, there's shows like Sons of Anarchy that really get into the motorcycle clubs. What about these shows do they get right, and what about these shows do they get wrong?

00:45:14 Could you describe a visually memorable experience that has stuck with you through your years in the motorcycle clubs?

00:47:38 Sounds of being a club member 

00:52:50 What music genres do you think most of the club listens to?

00:54:00 Do bikes automatically have a stereo outfitted, or is that like an extra accessory that people bring?

00:54:47 If you're just driving in your hearse and you hear a bike going down the road and you hear something from that bike, what would you hear where it's like, man needs to get that checked out?

00:55:51 What extra precautions do motorcyclists have to take while on the road with other vehicles?

00:57:34 How do these club nicknames come to fruition?

01:01:02 What sort of protective gear does one wear while riding?

01:01:56 What sort of accessories do you see people outfitting their motorcycles with?

01:02:27 Do people most often only have one bike or is it like, once you have one, you get 12?

01:03:18 And when people do the outfits with aftermarket stuff, are there certain websites that folk go to, or is it just whatever you find?

WEBSITE

https://takesonetowriteone.com/

OTHER LINKS

YouTube: https://tinyurl.com/T1tW1-YouTube

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In Part Two of this two-part series, Alex, the experienced coffee shop manager, continues sharing insights into the coffee world. From dealing with customers and navigating the unique culture of a coffee shop to tips for aspiring baristas, Alex dives deep into the nitty-gritty of barista life. He touches on everything from sensory environments and managing chaos, to building relationships with regulars and dealing with tough shifts. If you’ve ever wondered about the day-to-day operations of a coffee shop, the skills you need to thrive as a barista, or what goes into making a perfect latte, this episode is full of rich, aromatic content to satisfy your curiosity.

TIMESTAMPS

00:00:48 What movies or TV shows or songs or other media get what you do correct?

00:02:16 Do you agree with a lot of stereotypes?

00:07:23 Overhearing a lot of hot goss in the shop

00:08:05 Is your team pretty gossipy?

00:08:32 Does the soundscape of your work environment influence your productivity or creativity?

00:08:38 If it's really noisy, are you able to make coffee no problem?

00:09:51 How do you curate a playlist for the shop?

00:12:34 How important is verbal communication with guests and also with your team?

00:14:03 What's the difference between a cappuccino and a latte?

00:15:39 Do you have an acute sense of hearing for certain problems?

00:17:30 What's the typical dress code?

00:18:51 Do you have a love-hate relationship with any of the appliances?

00:20:56 What's the science with tamping?

00:22:42 Do coffee beans or grounds have a distinct feeling or tactile characteristic that you look for?

00:23:36 Is it true that if you roast it longer, there's less caffeine?

00:24:50 What makes a good pour over?

00:26:53 Do you have anything that you reach for comfort at the coffee shop?

00:28:00 In an increasingly digital world, how do you balance the virtual and physical realms of your work?

00:30:48 Do you have any immediate thoughts on tipping?

00:34:42 Let's talk about some coffee temperatures.

00:35:12 If something, like if an espresso shot was pulled poorly, like it's too sour or something, is there any saving that with the other ingredients with the drinks that you put in?

00:37:07 What gets you excited about working at the shop?

00:37:21 What about it drains your energy?

00:38:54 What's in the refrigerator of a coffee barista?

00:40:34 Let's talk about dairy and dairy alternatives.

00:42:52 Do any scents or flavors when you're outside of the shop trigger you into feeling like you're back in the shop?

00:45:57 Is there something where like this box of X, Y, Z has been here for like way too long because you never use it?

00:46:20 When you make your syrups, what's the process with that?

00:47:32 The term third place originates from a 1989 book called The Great Good Place by sociologist Ray Oldenburg…Are there challenges or considerations that you make related to maintaining a balanced sensory environment?

00:50:10 What sort of work do you see people doing there?

00:51:05 If you were to make a candle representing your coffee shop, what fragrances would it have?

00:52:59 Murphy's Law states that anything that can go wrong will go wrong. What is something that perhaps is often overlooked or forgotten when it comes to operating a coffee shop?

00:53:54 Is there less coffee drinking in the summer versus the winter?

00:54:40 Is it safe to assume that in the summer and the hot months, more ice drinks are going to be made, and then in the winter, in the colder months, more hot drinks are going to be made?

00:56:15 Do you notice perhaps the younger demographic getting more sweet drinks compared to the older demographic getting more robust drinks?

00:56:59 How has your intuition evolved or grown as you've gained experience with the shop?

00:58:12 What is something that you had to learn on the job?

00:58:41 Did you have advice from people or is that learning on the job?

00:59:09 What's a sign that a day is going to go well?

00:59:26 What's a sign that the day is going to go badly?

00:59:43 Shift Change and Schedules 

01:02:02 Do you have any advice for individuals who are aspiring to be a barista entering the world of coffee shops?

01:03:41 Where can one find more information about baristas and or coffee shops?

01:05:08 Do you notice that Detroit does their coffee a certain way?

01:05:55 How important is networking or building professional relationships within the industry?

01:07:02 What strategies have you found effective for nurturing these connections?

01:08:42 How many times does one visit a coffee shop before they become a regular?

01:09:13 So what is something that you think most people working in coffee shops might like changed about the industry?

01:11:19 What did it take 10,000 hours for you to learn about coffee or coffee shops?

01:11:58 If there was a latte art specifically for your shop, what do you think that it would look like?

01:12:59 Was latte art always a thing or has this like started within the last few years?

01:14:01 When reading books and journals from 30 years ago, even like 10 years ago, there's bound to be out of date tools or terminology…Regarding baristas, coffee, coffee shops, the whole gamut…Have you seen much change in what's happened?

01:14:44 Going off the question regarding things going out of date, what is something that is probably future proof?

01:16:03 Do you have any [espresso machine] brands in mind that you might recommend?

01:16:24 If you read (blank) in a book about coffee, baristas, coffee shop, whatever, if you read blank, you would know that the author did their research.

01:17:11 If somebody wasn't in this field, they would never believe what?

WEBSITE

https://takesonetowriteone.com/

OTHER LINKS

YouTube: https://tinyurl.com/T1tW1-YouTube

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In Part One of this warm and frothy two-part series, Katherine cozies up with Alex, the operating manager of her favorite local coffee shop. Alex brings several years of experience in the coffee world to the table—along with a few unforgettable stories. From deciphering complicated espresso orders to watching romances (and breakups) unfold over cappuccinos, this episode captures the full flavor of life behind the bar. They talk third wave coffee, customer quirks, latte art, and what it really means to build a community over caffeine.

If you’re a writer curious about people-watching in cafes or someone who just loves the hum of espresso machines and the ritual of a good brew, this episode is your next great listen.

TIMESTAMPS

00:01:21 But when and how did you get involved in this field?

00:02:08 Third wave, what does that mean?

00:02:38 So did you ever see yourself doing this beforehand, like getting into the coffee?

00:04:10 Intro of “Fact or Fiction”

00:04:30 Is it common for you to have regulars who come in daily and spend hours at the shop?

00:06:41 As the proverbial Gunther, the owner of Central Park, what sort of relationships do you get to foster with the regulars?

00:08:22 Do customers claim specific tables or spots in the shop that are their own or are there like regulars that only sit in like the corner spot that you know, you got to have that table ready?

00:10:22 Does weather affect the shop?

00:13:03 Have you ever had customers request to perform or sing or bring something out of the Ordinary to the shop?

00:13:58 What are the hours of your shop?

00:15:20 Have you witnessed romantic encounters in your cafe, and are there any first dates, proposals, or awkward breakups that just really stick out?

00:18:59 How long do customers usually hang out there, and what's the longest anybody has ever stayed?

00:22:22 Karens

00:24:41 Do you ever have customers that come in without ordering things?

00:26:46 Has there ever been a situation where a regular customer ended up working at the cafe or helping out behind the counter?

00:30:01 Do people ever use your shop to celebrate parties or anything?

00:31:02 Have you or any of your coworkers ever had a crush on a regular customer or noticed customers crushing on each other?

00:33:06 What is the most complex or strange coffee order you have ever had to make?

00:37:00 Do you know [people] by, like, their coffee order?

00:37:26 What's “single origin”?

00:38:25 Have there been any memorable accidents, spills, or other incidents in your cafe that felt like something out of a sitcom?

00:42:26 Have you had any local town celebrities or influencers come in?

00:46:32 Do you ever give away free drinks to regulars or under special circumstances?

00:48:26 Do you ever have to cut people off from coffee?

00:51:29 When you said for a certain amount of time for the espresso pulls, what is that?

00:52:13 What does it mean to adjust the grind?

00:55:28 Would anything on your body give away that you work at a coffee shop?

00:56:48 Latte Art 

00:58:23 What does a rosetta look like, and what does a stack look like?

00:59:10 Are there elements that are in, like, a certain coffee drink where you know that a rosetta or a stack is just not going to turn up?

01:00:24 Are there people that take drinks that aren't theirs?

01:02:10 Is there a preferred order or way in which you would appreciate the order being asked for?

01:07:05 And are the codes that you use, are they pretty standard?

01:08:47 I went out of my way to see what the most complicated order at Starbucks could be.

WEBSITE

https://takesonetowriteone.com/

OTHER LINKS

YouTube: https://tinyurl.com/T1tW1-YouTube

Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/T1tW1-Spotify

YouTube Music: https://tinyurl.com/T1tW1-YouTubeMusic

Pinterest: https://tinyurl.com/T1tW1-Pinterest

Instagram: https://tinyurl.com/T1tW1-Instagram