Talking With Burritos

This is not about elections, steel dossiers, or FBI reports I will never read. This is all about how sexy, crazy, cool, and dangerous those Russians can be on screen and off.

Movies with actors doing Russian Things:

1. Vanessa Angel from Spies Like Us
2. Viggo Mortenson from that one killer movie, Eastern Promises
3. Everyone in White Nights. Even Gregory Hines, a defector from the U.S. Mikhail Baryshnikov, Helen Mirren, and Isabella Rossellini
4. Salt - Angelina Jolie

Red Sparrow is a film, starring Jennifer Lawrence, about a young ballerina recruited into an elite organization of spies who use sex, not guns as a weapon. 

• Red Sparrow opened at the wrong time of the #metoo movement, or was it just in time to justify the cause?

This, That and Other News

• The case of Sergei and Anna Chapman. 
• Maria Butina who sales couches and US gun toting charm.
• This guy fakes his own death to elude an assassination plot. 
• Sex coaches offer up the goods, America doesn't bite. 
• The Cold War scare. Even in the early eighties, we had to prepare for a potential bomb scare/ nuclear fallout. Duck and cover.

Links to articles reference on this podcast.

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In This Episode

1. Liam Neeson did that to himself.

2. 15:17 To Paris and the Hollywood movie meant for Lifetime.

3. Patriots Day and true event films. How long to wait before we capitalize on a tragedy.

4. When art transcends admiration.

5. Eurotrip: The Movie we don't have now.

Liam Nesson takes the low road, on purpose.

C'mon, bruh, you volunteered this information which allowed the media to run away with it. However, should we care? Will we somehow erase the memory of watching this man portray roles in Schindler's List, Star Wars: Episode One, or all the Taken movies?

What he said was stupid and insensitive. Who he is, is flawed like you and me. 

15:17 to Paris is not a Clint Eastwood, like, Movie - On The Thread

• 15:17 should begin after the train attack.
• Clint Eastwood offended people with some of his views on Hilary Clinton during and after the election. He is a person who is a famous actor and director. Who cares what he thinks. His art is what we relate to the man, not the other way around.
• Of his 39 credits as director, 15:17 is far from any exemplary in comparison to his previous productions.
• 15:17 played too much like a Lifetime movie, which made it almost unbearable to watch.
• Recognizable movie and television actors also made it difficult to believe a story that is a true story.
• This movie portrays true events with those involved at the time it occurred. Less recognizable actors would make this film more convincing.
• Eastwood tried to tell the tale of these four heroes as truthful as he possibly could but ended up hurting Hollywood appeal by coming at this project wearing kids gloves.

Spending twenty minutes with these fellows on vacation while sightseeing was boring.

All the drama occurred at the end of this film, whereas, it ignored the issue of every life that is not so spectacular: the single mother raising her child, the effect of a young boy losing his best friend, and a man’s struggle to find a place in a world where he needed fit in.

Patriots Day and applying Hollywood ascetic to real life events.

The real heroes of this very real event are the first responders. Stories of their bravery in a time of crisis are good stories to be told on Good Morning America or with news outlets, however, to capture the Hollywood flair, movie depiction of horrible events have to include some sort of stretch to the imagination.

Stories change with each retelling.

The shootout at the end of Patriots Day between the two terrorists and law enforcement, although not accurately depicted, added a Hollywood pizazz to events that in realtime occurred quickly and without dramatic pause.

15:17 To Paris reminded me of that EuroTrip Movie in a way but less boring.

If you really want a Eurotrip movie, then stay away from Hostile aka torture porn movies of the early 2000s. Watch this silly film about a high school graduate in search of his pen pal and love of his life.

1. Michelle Trachtenberg of Buffy fame. 2. Matt Damon 3. Stupid comedy movies and the event film. 4. Teen angst movies: there are none. Only things kids are into these days is Juuls and Fortnite. 5. It’s just a different world.

When Art Transcends Admiration - Scoop Du Jour

I was upset by past rhetoric expressed by Clint Eastwood years ago and lost admiration for a man I thought was a great visionary and storyteller. However, one doesn't associate with the other. His thoughts on Hilary Clinton doesn't reflect on his filmmaker vision. 

Reality stars, actors, and sports heroes are not who we imagine them to be in most instances; they are people. What we admire is their art, the characters, and on-screen personas. Nowadays with social media, we know more about them as individuals and it's not flattering.

No matter how mundane they are in comparison to the most popular Twitch streamer or Youtube star, your story matters. If you want to tell that story, go on ahead while the getting is good. We have the technology and other means, so why not? The stupidest person in the world can have a Youtube or blog account.

We invest in idols and the characters we believe they are. Reality stars, actors, and sports heroes, sometimes they are not who we imagine them to be.

No matter how mundane they are in comparison to the most popular Twitch streamer or Youtube star, your story matters. If you want to tell that story, then go on ahead while the getting is good. We have the technology and other means, so why not. The stupidest person in the world likely has a youtube or blog account.

Weekly Gratitude: Our realities might not be great, but they are our stories.

Flava text: Always shoot from the hip. We're always open for suggestions and/or a favorable comment But Machete don't tweet. Okay, well leave us a voicemail or email: Phone 520-775-1690 Email [email protected] Where To Subscribe and Listen

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Recently, Warner Bros. released The Meg as proof that sharks are not bankable unless you make them silly. As frightening a creature as sharks seem, they are never good subjects for a movie. There are very few plots involving sharks in which to script an original film. Depending on the idea, a thrilling shark movie should never be over-conceptualized. Just keep it simple: sharks plus ocean equals scary.   Sharks strike fear in the minds of most people who ever watched Jaws. As frightening a creature they are; however, sharks are never good subjects for a movie. There are very few plots involving sharks in which to script an original film.  Jaws is the best shark film made, and that was just about 40 years ago. Tell the same story over with The Shallows and add in a human element, Open Water, then you might just come close to some decent, but nothing is or will ever be as good as Jaws.    In this episode:  

• The Shallows and Open Water are two good films that embody the simplicity of a good shark film. 
• Crazy shark movies that have to make the animal more terrifying than they are is not embracing the horror most of us feel when we consider swimming in an ocean.
• Shark movies should rely on the fear already embedded within our psyche. Prey on the audience by feeding upon the fear most of us have of being in the ocean. 

Scoop Du Jour: Naked Mole Rats and The Probability of the SyFy network.        Wow, it’s amazing how this has come full circle. As we near this pinnacle of 100 episodes I revisit episode three of this podcast when we discussed the probability of the SyFy network, and how movies, like, Sharknado would not keep it afloat.    Audiences give less attention to the movies, it’s the series that made the probable success of the SyFy network a reality.    This, that, other news, and Stingrays:  

• Boy gets stung by a shark in the willy-wacker. 
• My daughter and her sting ray vacation.
• Talk about having something stuck in your head. Try this: insert baby shark song. 

Weekly Gratitude:   My daughter is alive and for that, I have nature to thank. Our bodies are magnificent machines hellbent on keeping us alive.    Flava text: Shuffle you feet or else bye bye go your pee-pee.   We're always open for suggestions and/or a favorable comment But Machete don't tweet. Okay, well leave us a voicemail or email: Phone 520-775-1690 Email [email protected]   Where To Subscribe and Listen

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My Oscar ballot results suck.    The Academy’s disappointment wins.  

• Moonlight wins over the much acclaimed La La Land
• Crash gets the statue over Brokeback Mountain, the favorite to win.
• Green Book was good enough to win, but not the only choice to lose against ‘the people’s’ favorites.

Some great film moments of 2018. We the audience are the Academy. Enjoy film however and wherever you can then use your platform to celebrate the movies and shows you enjoy.  

• That one scene in the Favourite when Rachel discovers Emma in the Queens bed.
• Roma and the representation of water as a narrative.
• The reveal of the horse-human hybrid in Sorry to Bother You.
• Topher Graces look of befuddlement after being duped by a black guy.
• Tessa Thompson...
• Ready Player One and The Shining recreation
• The fake ending in Sicario.
• Overlord, because killing Nazi zombies is fun.
• The quiet meditation of First Man
• Soderberg's iPhone movie Unsane.
• Tom Cruise and MI5, plus, all the practical effects.
• The foot and the nail of The Quiet Place

  Spielberg to speak at the Academy of Arts about Netflix and Amazon created movies and their eligibility for the coveted award.   Our Spectacle crusader is here to preserve the sanctity of film but is he too late?    

1. Fighting for the sanctity of Hollywoods future credibility? Isn’t it acceptable to allow this medium to flourish as technology and the times change?
2. Films available to a television audience first are not vetted enough for conservation by the Academy of Motion Pictures.
3. The nostalgia of watching a movie in theatres remains a memorable experience.
4. Watching films on phones and mobile devices.
5. Comic book movies.

  The Irishman challenge by Netflix and a pure film enthusiast, Martin Scorsese.    Great commercial spot dig. Touche Netflix.   I need a definition of Best Picture   The auteur in the realm of advocacy.   Do awards matter?   A win will get you more watches. Improve your status as a viable risk worth a studio taking a chance.   Credibility goes a long way in this business.    The sentiment that the creation is the best reward whether your audience is in the millions or the neighborhood few.   Drake at the Grammys. Guillermo at the Oscars.

Looking back on this movie in relation to the title of the film, there should be a more artist approach to this biopic for the band Queen and not the man Freddy Mercury. At face value, Bohemian Rhapsody is a paint-by-the-numbers biopic without the celebratory weight of a meaningful story.   They dangle Freddy Mercury on screen just long enough for us to pat at the plight of this man who (may have) suffered secretly with his sexuality but extroverted himself through music, another gift born unto him. To know what empowered Mercury to sing is to know the truth behind the lyrics of songs endeared by millions.   Same goes with the talents of his bandmates and what inspired them to form a band named Smile. Whether it be audiences short attention spans or the parameters of constraining a film to under one-hundred and sixty minutes, Queen’s biopic lacks the importance of truth beyond the entertainment.   Headlines:   

• Freddie Mercury was Queen. Sorry, you have to hear that.

• Bohemian Rhapsody was initially a Freddy Mercury biopic with Sacha Baron Cohen casts as the lead singer.

  Bohemian Rhapsody featuring the music of Queen, and my aversion to the biopic.

  Are biopics, those unwilling to take risks, worth the cost?

This, That, and Other News

• Queen wrote and performed the theme song for Highlander: The Movie and Highlander the series. The show and the movie were my first exposure to Queen’s music. I’ve listened to We Are the Champions and We Will Rock You deservingly without ever knowing the artists performing the songs until Highlander debuted on television.
•  That pesky comet,  Oumuamua, might be alien. Then again, it may not be alien.
• Woman calls the cops on a whale, seriously. This is what happens to the Open Water franchise. Why do people call the cops for things they should mind on their own. Get your own cat out the tree, Timmy!

Weekly Gratitude:

Doc says I’m healthy, like a bull. I say you’re full of ..it.

Flava text: Nothing really matters. Links Mentioned in This Episode:

 http://talkingwithburritos.com/86

 

We're always open for suggestions and/or a favorable comment But Machete don't tweet. Okay, well leave us a voicemail or email: Phone 520-775-1690 Email [email protected] Where To Subscribe and Listen

• Podcast subscription page
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• If you enjoyed this episode, leave a review on Apple iTunes!

 

 

Halloween has a newfound popularity rooted in a remake that is a sequel (a remakequel) to the beginnings of a franchise relaunch. Not new material, but there’s a case for simplicity with horror movies that over time lost to the evolving use of special effects and jump scares. Halloween (2018) wasn’t a great movie; however, it is what this genre needs as a reflection back to when simple storying telling thrilled the masses. 

This, That, Other News, and Crytoids

• Aliens and May 2018 triangle in the sky.
• Time Traveler, Jamie Oliver, Claims to be from the year 6491. 
• Lochness Sightings! Please, oh please, use your feet to zoom!
• Don’t do what daddy does. Do what daddy does not and have some common sense, idiot!
• Vajayjay beer. 
• A Few Good Sasquatch
• Woman admits to having relations with a ghost

Weekly Gratitude: 

Thanks to my wife, I won't have to marry a ghost. 

Flava text: 

There's a girl... on my bed. YES!

Links Mentioned in This Episode: Triangle in the sky   Time Traveler   Loch on Camera    Girl on the lake with Grandma   Snake Pastor   Bigfoot In Court    We're always open for suggestions and/or a favorable comment But Machete don't tweet. Okay, well leave us a voicemail or email: Phone 520-775-1690 Email [email protected]   Where To Subscribe and Listen

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Remakes and Franchises make movie watching boring these days. Same ol’ this and with a sprinkle of that thing already imagined. Jurassic World and Ocean’s 8 are two examples of films —this summer— whose failure to deviate from the plot and character development of it’s precursors to produced a final product that hit all the marks of fanfare but lacked originality.

What's In This Episode

1. Weighing down Jurassic World: Kingdom is a story that went way off the grid of believability, but conforms to the beloved moments of the first film, Jurassic Park.
2. Sicario, is new to the franchise market, but can it survive as a profitable film series to a story that needed no sequel?
3. With a cast of eight actresses and the potential to breath new life into this forgotten franchise, Ocean’s 8 failed to create a better version of the original film by sticking to the Soderbergh heist movie formula.
4. I blame tween novels, and the social media experience.

 

We’re always open for suggestions and/or a favorable comment

But Machete don’t tweet. Okay, well leave us a voicemail or email:

Phone 520-775-1690 Email [email protected]   Where To Subscribe and Listen

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We're always open for suggestions and/or a favorable comment.   But Machete don't tweet. Okay, well leave us a voicemail or email: Phone 520-775-1690 Email [email protected]   In This Episode...   The movie theatre is a venue; a luxury, to which only some of us can afford to indulge regularly. Subscription services, like, Movies Pass, Stubs, and Cinemark’s Movie Club make that indulgence a more considerable option than waiting for movies to premiere on Netflix. No matter who’s paying, it’s a great experience when we’re paying less.   1. Movie Pass is a great concept but a horrible business model based on the average subscription holder not going to movies.   2. Studios could totally ruin the nostalgia of watching movies in theaters but also increase attendance with Episodic Movie or the Event Film. Links Mentioned in This Episode Amc shops subscription model, Stubs. Variety Alamo draft house and Season Pass Best years for summer movies supplied by Ranker   Where To Subscribe and Listen

• Podcast subscription page 
• Listen on Apple Podcast:
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• If you enjoyed this episode, leave a review with Apple Podcasts iTunes!

Black Panther is the only black James Bond we need. He has the tech, a suave demeanor, and the well intent to undermine criminal minds who threaten his nations. It would be great to have a black James Bond character on the big screen but as long as he or she is not James Bond and more Bond-like. I’m bored of remakes and studio attempts to reinsert old titles into the modern day film industry by way of cultural appropriation: Female Ghostbusters, a black James Bond. Good ideas. Lazy imagination.

The sole popularity of the title and name of a product (the film) remains the only selling point for the repurposing a franchise with different faces of gender or race.

I hate the idea of that guy from Get Out as black bond; it’s only an accurate casting because he's British.

In this Episode:

• Traits Black Panther and James Bond share
• Starks and T-Challa
• The opposite moral compass
• What makes a King - Scoop du Jour
• Snipes and the Blank Panther Film that never was
• No matter how you spin it, movies don't have a race.

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE SHOW

Wesley Snipes and the Black Panthermovie that never was but came to become.

Daniel Kaluuya as James Bond

Weekly Gratitude:

Always bet on black, and please pay your taxes. 

FLAVA TEXT THIS WEEK: 

Don't sneak up on me like that colonizer.

We're always open for suggestions and/or a favorable comment

But Machete don'ttweet. Okay, well leave us a voicemail or email:

Phone 520-775-1690 Email [email protected]   WHERE TO SUBSCRIBE AND LISTEN:

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• If you enjoyed this episode, leave a review with Apple PodcastsiTunes!

Thanks for listening.

 

 

 

Solo is an entertaining movie and could possibly be more to audiences if we could accept him --the individual, Solo-- as the main character rather than a sidekick who just so happens to be the baby daddy to certain Skywalker progeny. This movie isn't necessary to the canon, however, has the potential to payout and entertaining storyline if we care to wait for forthcoming sequels.

People “riding’ Solo for the all wrong reasons.

Solo is not a bad film, only unnecessary to the storyline we already know exists of the infamous Hans Solo of the first trilogy. Han has redeemable qualities and that just does not work for a scoundrel. This is a lawless land. Let us witness its lawlessness. Go raw. Go dark. Surprise the audience with a captivating story of a criminal who is a criminal.

Rogue One is a far better film than Solo.

The mission was to take down the Destroyer by any means necessary. The stakes were such that no one would survive. There was an ending to that tale, whereas, with Solo there is more to beget. The story continues without fulfilling a need to expose Solo for who he and not what he became after his adventures with the Skywalkers.

Solo as a summer tentpole movie: meant to entertain.

There just isn’t much importance to this film in relation to the current Star Wars Saga, however, if my theory suggests then maybe this explains the origins of a newly birthed Star Wars legend.

Is there still such a thing as a summer tentpole with one studio dominating the market. Disney has a gambit of films debuting this summer. Every other studio fails in its comparison. Investing in preexisting titles and not taking a chance on original not-so-sure-shots drys the well dampened by only one studio entity, Disney.

Early May and April are too early for summer releases.

Summer movies start early, in April. June is the true beginnings of the Summer film season. Actually, it’s always been Memorial Day. Here are my expectations and movies I look forward to watching this summer.

Scoop du Jour: The Preordain Clapback.

Why you should always have a plan of retaliation in social media beef.

Links mention in this episode:

This video of the Loch Ness monster is nothing to swoon over. 

George Lucas wanted to go all metaphysical with the Jedi sequels. 

This video of the Loch Nessmonster is nothing to swoon over.

George Lucaswanted to go all metaphysical with the Jedi sequels.

It started with Pusha T's Infrared. Got serious with Drake's Duppy Freestyle, and ended with the Story of Adidon. How much more cinematic can you get?

Cryptoid of the Week:

There has been another siting of a Loch Ness log.

Flava Text: Never trust anyone.

We're always open for suggestions and/or a favorable comment

But Machete don'ttweet. Okay, well leave us a voicemail or email:

Phone 520-775-1690 Email [email protected]   WHERE TO SUBSCRIBE AND LISTEN:

• The full catalog, minus, shownotes
• Our podcast subscription page
• Listen on Apple Podcast:
• Or download to your Android device using these suggested apps: Subscribe on Android
• If you enjoyed this episode, leave a review with Apple Podcasts iTunes!