Technically Correct

Worlds are colliding. Joanna Gaines just installed Still or Sparkling® taps at her new coffee shop and we couldn't be happier. There's a 10% royalty attached to that branding though and we only accept payment in Chalk Paint.

This week: backup shaming, infrastructure talk, and for the first time ever, we circle back, literally, to something from last week's parking lot.

Links:

• Still or Sparking™️ at Magnolia Press

When Bryce Harper was traded to the Phillies by the Washington Walgreens, fans in America’s capital did not find it quite so Nice!. #expiredjokes

This week: taking a number at the IKEA DMV, browsing the aisles at Target, and pondering the looming regulation of a 4,000 pound pack of batteries on wheels. 🚗.

Links:

• Space Jam

Quick! Download this episode before TiVo gets the bright idea to sell pre-roll ad inventory against podcasts too!

This week: what we talk about when we talk about always on displays, long exposure risotto, and Carlos hates on an Ed Sheeran collab before getting all the facts. smdh. 🍔.

Links:

• Ed Sheeran & Heinz

When the robots come for our jobs, what they’ll remember was if you were mean to those autonomous Bolt EVs in San Francisco rush-hour traffic and if you helped a Roomba off a cliff. Choose wisely.

This week: shucking hard drive oysters ordered from Amazon at 3AM, waking up early is the new staying up late, and seasonal food gimmicks for millennials. 🧀.

Links:

• The Oregonian on Twitter: "Pizza Hut debuts a gigantic Cheez-It stuffed with even more cheese https://t.co/BHw6hKNUJW https://t.co/XuOT6NrbGQ" / Twitter

Due to the passage of California AB-11, which puts a mandatory waiting period on issuing hot takes, this week’s show was recorded a day late for compliance purposes. Please enjoy these cogent, room temperature takes.

This week: mixed recycling, the villains of the Trader Joe’s line, and a new way to make cold brew. 🎃.

Links:

• Pumpkin Cream Cold Brew | Starbucks Coffee Company

Look. We'll make you a deal. Become a founding member of our show before Flag Day and we'll give you three years for the price of one. That's only... wait — what's zero divided by 36?

This week: problematic TV of the '90s and early aughts, ice baseballs, and fresh margs in a pickle jar. 🥒.

Links:

• Mozzarella Sticks in Crocs

With the Chase Center opening up in just over a month, we, as biz dev and synergy experts, have an incredible opportunity to help a deserving brand acquire the naming rights for what was formerly known as Oracle Arena. Leading candidates include: the Allbirds Center, Blue Bottle Stadium, and our personal favorite, the Uber Cactusdome®.

This week: smart appliance Jenga, annual passholder culture, and we do the math on the Taylor Swift economy, feat. Shawn Mendes. 🎤.

Links:

• XLOOKUP Announcement

“Teddy told me that in Greek, “nostalgia” literally means, “the pain from an old wound”. It’s a twinge in your heart, far more powerful than memory alone. This device isn’t a spaceship. It’s a time machine. It goes backwards, forwards. It takes us to a place where we ache to go again. It’s not called the Wheel. It’s called a Fancy Camera®.” - Carlos G.

Or maybe Don Draper said it. We have no way of possibly looking it up.

This week: road trips, making memories, and a primer on how to clean and care for your iPod Hi-Fi. 🛁.

Links:

• Episodes | Reply All

When you really think about it, isn’t life just one big espresso machine that won’t fit under your kitchen cabinets?

This week: dog influencers, sweatpant shoes, and Ryan would like to take a moment to talk about video games. 👾.

Links:

• Allbirds Socks

Rumor has it Tim Cook was first choice to be the voice of Simba in the new Lion King remake but talks fell apart when he insisted on changing the lyrics of the iconic song to “I Just Can’t Wait to be King [of Undifferentiated Consumer Financial Products]“. We can see why Disney passed.

This week: clicking around in the document, ripping up the flooring, and the answer to what $21 gets you in 2019. 💵.

Links:

• Model 3 Aero Wheel Cap Kit