Plot holes galore, being three billion percent gay, and not wanting to run from zombies because we hate running – Diane Hoh did a whoops with The Accident!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at https://www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

What's the worst kind of wank? Are vampires more like hamsters or badgers? And will R.L. Stine be at the bottom of our list – or the top? (Hint: we're horrified by our own choices.)

This season, again, we've suffered through (*ahem* ENJOYED) 10 Point Horrors. Which was the goodest? Which was the good-baddest? And, most importantly, which was the pointiest?

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

A cul-de-sac of haunted flaps, mispronouncing fecund and more metaphors than you can shake a phallic hammer at – CBC is bringing us ALL THE PLOT with The Vampire's Promise!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at https://www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

Horny murderous teenage girls, insufficiently roomy vaginas and FBI agents who might be aliens – R.L. Stine has performed a Christmas miracle by writing a book we ACTUALLY LIKE!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at https://www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

Lumberjack kink, a love rhombus and a dead woman masquerading as a pair of wet curtains – our girl RTC is genuinely scaring us with Help Wanted!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

The true purpose of big sandwiches, stealing clothes after sex, and something that looks like a vagina – we're regretting our decision to look in Carol Ellis's Window!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

Aspiring to have cattitude, not wanting smellophone, and guys who definitely shouldn't be working at the morgue – we wish we could run away from R.L. Stine's Hit & Run!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at https://www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

Being undressed by Edward Scissorhands, putting cupcakes on Russell Brand's nipples, and the difference between Eminem and Cookie Monster – we're getting starstruck with Carol Ellis in The Stalker!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

Too soon for poos, tedious girl concerns and dogs wondering when their husbands will come home from war – John Hall is crowning with Homecoming Queen!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at https://www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)

Doing shit in all-caps, mums laughing at bollocks and unsettling post-its – we're reading Sinclair Smith's secrets in The Diary!

Join Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry to lovingly dissect the best (and worst) of 90s teen horror. Point Horror, Goosebumps, Fear Street, slasher films – we love it all. Follow on Twitter @teenagescream_ and Instagram @teenagescreampod to join the conversation and request future books.

If you like what we're doing and want to join the community, you can become a patron at www.patreon.com/teenagescreampodcast

Thank you to Susie McConnell for our catchy theme tune, and to Jean Merrick for the badass logo (which you know you want as a pin badge...)