The Accidental Leader

Fear of change is a part of being an accidental leader. And if we're not faced with change and fear, there's probably a problem.

Today, I'm joined by James Robert Lay, CEO of Digital Growth Institute. We have a free flow conversation about the fear of change, letting go of bad habits to grow and how to trust ourselves. We talk about the importance of executive coaching, therapy and putting in a lot of uncomfortable work to become better leaders and people.    

Time Stamps:

[2:30] - Bo introduces James.

[3:30] - James talks about going from a punk rock band to a CEO.

[7:02] - The fear of the unknown precedes the fear of change.

[10:13] - You have to lead yourself before you can lead others.

[14:04] - As a leader, you need to be able to trust yourself before you can trust others.

[18:38] - Working with new coaches helps give different perspectives.

[21:30] - James defines what perspective means to him.

[25:00] - When it comes to coaching a lot of people get sticker shock.

[28:20] - Making pros and cons lists helps put you into perspective.

[30:35] - You have to let go of things to grow.

[33:43] - Being non-committal is a recipe for failure.

[37:14] - It's important to be comfortable being uncomfortable.

[40:09] - Eight years before writing his first books, James laughed at the idea of writing a book.

[42:28] - Accidental leaders need to have faith in themselves.

Links:

James on LinkedIn

[email protected]

Books

Banking on Digital Growth: The Strategic Marketing Manifesto to Transform Financial Brands by James Robert Lay 

The Obstacle Is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph by Ryan Holiday 

To be a great leader, you first have to lead yourself. You have to focus on yourself as a person and understand your traumas and your past.

Today, I'm joined by Mary Jane Walsh, life coach and business coach from New Orleans. We have a candid conversation about coaching sessions with Mary Jane. We detail how Mary Jane was able to dig deep and ask thought provoking questions to help me grow as a leader but more importantly, a person.  

Time Stamps:

[1:45] - Bo introduces Mary Jane

[2:30] - When coaching someone Mary Jane treats her clients the way she'd like to be supported.

[4:00] - Mary Jane pushed her clients to ask themselves the hard questions.

[5:45] - Her clients always worry that Mary Jane isn't an expert in their industry.

[6:30] - Coaching isn't for people who need it, it's for people who want it.

[9:45] - Bo gets candid about his time working with Mary Jane.

[15:00] - Coaching with Mary Jane has given Bo perspective of his past.

[19:15] - Mary Jane discusses some of Bo's triggers.

[23:16] - Coaching is about fixing the problem, not the symptom.

[27:40] - Bo and Mary Jane discuss how she works with his team of leaders.

[30:30] - Mary Jane describes how she went from a chef to a life coach.

[35:15] - Athletes are some of Mary Jane's clients.

[40:00] - We often tell ourselves lies so we can stay complacent.

Links:

Mary Jane's Website

"No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man." This quote from Heraclitus illustrates that in both life and business you can't go back. You can only go forward.

Today, I discuss my recent trip to my hometown of Binghamton, New York and how it reminded me of that Heraclitus quote. It made me consider a series of "what-ifs" and helped me gain clarity about the river I stand in today.

Time Stamps:

[2:18] - Bo tells a story that illustrates how in business you can't go back.

[3:30] -  Remembering his first radio job, Bo tells stories about some former listeners.

[6:00] - During a recent trip back to his hometown of Binghamton, New York Bo noticed how much things have changed.

[9:30] - His trip back home made Bo consider a series of "what-ifs".

[12:00] - Where would Bo's team be had he never left Binghamton?

[14:30] - Bo recites Garth Brooks lyrics.

[16:30] - Sometimes memories are better left as memories.

"Can't never did a thing." Every time we use the word "can't" we've already ruled out the possibilities of what we can and can't do. When we say "can't" we've already failed.

Today, CEO of Lion's Share Credit Union, James McBride joins me to discuss how his diagnosis of cerebral palsy set him up for a life of not letting other people's perceived limitations become actual limitations. He's never let anyone tell him what he can't do and today, he instills that mindset into the employees he leads. 

Time Stamps:

[1:00] - Bo recounts a story about how his kindergarten teacher fostered his creativity.

[4:00] - James doesn't let other people's perceived limitations affect how he lives his life.

[8:45] - Being a rebel is how James has accomplished what he has. When he was told he couldn't do something he set out to prove them wrong.

[10:10] - Perfection isn't what's important, it's the pursuit of perfection that matters.

[12:05] - No one but you can decide what you can't do.

[15:05] - When James joined Lion's Share, the first thing he wanted to do was meet each employee and understand them as individuals.

[18:30] - As a new CEO, building trust is the key.

[22:00] - Making tough discussions is the unfortunate job of all leaders.

[24:30] - It's challenging to know when it's the right time to give bad news.

[28:00] - Once a tough discussion is made, it's like a sigh of relief.

[30:02] - Invest in people while they're with you, not because they're with you.

[33:00] - James shouts out his leadership mentor.

[37:40] - Making your employees make their own decisions helps them grow.

[40:00] - "Can't" is oftentimes just a different way of saying you don't want to do the work.

Links:

Be 2.0 by Jim Collins and William Lazier

Leadership and mental health isn't talked about often. It's uncomfortable and people often don't want to acknowledge it out of fear of it being perceived as a weakness. But when a leader is struggling with their mental health it's not a weakness.

Today, author Paul Gaumer joins me to discuss his experience struggling with his mental health. Paul is the COO of an Illinois Credit Union. Today, he describes how he pushes through when his Bipolar disorder is causing him to experience severe self-doubt.

Time Stamps:

[2:46] - Bo tells a little known story about Abraham Lincoln's mental health.

[7:00] - Paul introduces himself and recounts his past experiences with his mental health.

[10:05] - When Paul was at his lowest, he started going to church and thought everything was going to be better.

[11:50] - Every morning Paul wakes up with self doubt.

[14:30] - Looking back at everything his credit union had accomplished helps Paul quiet his self doubt. 

[15:40] - Bo has two Johns who shaped his leadership and Paul has two Toms.

[18:33] - Paul tells a story about how he met his first Tom.

[21:40] - A good leader always reassures their employees that they deserve to have the job they have.

[22:30] - We hear about Paul's second Tom.

[25:20] - Leading by intimidation and deception is a recipe for unhappy employees. 

[28:00] - Taking the time to get to know your employees is essential.

[32:43] - To be a good leader, you have to be willing to listen.

[37:31] - Paul recounts a story highlighting how to help someone struggling with their mental health.

[40:00] - The days of heavy handed leadership are gone.

Links:

Walk with the Light in the Shadows by Paul Gaumer

No leader's path is the same. But all leaders have certain things in common, authenticity, kindness and honesty just to name a few.

Today, Jennifer Pham joins me to discuss her journey from a junior graphic designer to a Vice President at Your Marketing Company. Going from a team member who barely spoke in meetings to a true leader, Jennifer is the true definition of an accidental leader.

Time Stamps:

[2:30] - Jennifer Pham joins Bo and explains how she joined Your Marketing Company.

[7:20] - She never really wanted to become a leader, Jennifer describes how she learned what a true leader is.

[9:00] - Good communication is the key to being an effective leader.

[11:30] - Understanding yourself is the key to being a good leader.

[14:00] - People really remember when they've worked with a bad leader.

[17:08] - The hardest part about being a leader for Jennifer, is when she has to fire people.

[19:36] - Letting people go from a company never gets easier.

[22:05] - When you're a leader, especially an accidental leader, it's progress over perfection.

[25:00] - A lot of times, leaders talk themselves out of things. It's important to trust your gut.

[27:55] - If your people succeed then you succeed.

Links:

Ego is the Enemy by Ryan Holiday

The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Baker

Money is a resource we focus a lot on as leaders and profit isn't something we should be ashamed of. But sometimes profits aren't everything, we also have to take care of ourselves physically, emotionally and mentally.

Today, author and entrepreneur, Jason Vitug joins me to discuss his career path from cleaning airport toilets to being a high level VP at a credit union to becoming an accidental entrepreneur. He talks about the moment he knew he needed to set more boundaries around his work life for a healthier life.

Time Stamps:

[2:00] - If you're making a lot of money, but don't have time to enjoy it. Why bother?

[5:28] - Jason introduces himself and recounts his journey as an accidental entrepreneur.

[7:20] - The entrepreneur life isn't for everyone and there isn't anything wrong with a traditional 9 to 5 job.

[9:50] - No one can tell you when or if you'll be satisfied with your work life. 

[11:00] - When Jason started getting physically ill he knew it was time to re-evaluate his work life.

[14:30] - It's really important for us to set realistic boundaries at work.

[18:00] - When setting boundaries, don't be too rigid.

[20:40] - You don't want to set a financial goal that takes you away from the way you want to live your life.

[24:30] - When we're present in the moment, that's when we can build the life we truly want.

[27:14] - Gears that grind too long get worn down and thrown out. It's the same with people.

[32:09] - Everyone is very unique. No one's journey is the same.

[33:15] - Passion is a combination of your time and resources.

[36:00] - You make much better choices when you want to do something instead of when you have to do something.

 [40:00] - Money can buy happiness when we spend it on wellness.

Links:

Happy Money Happy Life: A Multidimensional Approach to Health, Wealth, and Freedom by Jason Vitug

You Only Live Once: The Roadmap to Financial Wellness and a Purposeful Life

Jason on Twitter

Jason on Instagram

Leaders can't lead a team if they can't lead themselves. 

Today I want to discuss a tough question. Leadership coach Brian Rollo joins me to discuss how leaders can't be great until they've learned how to lead themselves. To do that leaders should use the ACT Framework. Accountability, Communication and Trust. Once you've mastered this with yourself, you're then able to turn that framework to your team and be a great leader.

Time Stamps:

[1:15] - Instead of asking "how can I make my team better?" Ask yourself "how can I lead myself better?"

[3:40] - We meet Brian Rollo with a quick introduction of himself.

[4:55] - Brian discusses the two types of people that typically don't work out for any given organization.

[6:00] - Influential leadership is leading yourself and being self aware.

[7:30] - For successful leadership follow the Accountability, Communication and Trust Framework.

[9:00] - It's easy to hold other people accountable but it's hard to do the same for ourselves. 

[11:27] - Brian gives us some tips for how to know you're successfully leading yourself.

[15:11] - When people observe a CEO they get non-verbal messages on how to act.

[17:10] - Influence is the best way of leading a company. Not demanding things out of employees.

[19:10] - Leaders have to continue to invest time in learning how to lead themselves.

[21:30] - Team training is like a shower, it isn't a one and done thing. You have to make training a habit.

[24:00] - Being able to confide in other leaders is invaluable.

[25:00] - As a leader, you can't just flip a switch to get your team to trust you. You have to gain trust person by person.

[28:00] - Everyone has their own root system that influences their judgment of leaders.

[30:15] - The consequences of not leading yourself will show in the success of your organization.

[33:30] - Brian tells the most tragic story of a leadership fail he's encountered.

[36:20] - We hear about a time when Brian made a mistake as a leader and lost a valuable employee and work friend.

[39:00] - Poor leadership has a trickle down effect.

[41:50] - Brian recounts a positive success story he's encountered.

Links:

Brian Rollo Consulting Company

Ego Is the Enemy by Ryan Holiday

DiSC Profile

Time. It's simple but it is so important. Leaders have the unique ability to control their time. That's why it's so important to replace 'I didn't have time' to 'that project wasn't a priority'. Then sit back and reflect on what else you prioritized instead. Then reflect on whether you truly have your priorities straight.

On today's episode, author and speaker Ash Davis joins host Bo McDonald. With failing health, Ash's father decided he wanted to write letters to various people who played important roles in his life. Those letters were eventually turned into Ash's book, A Life Through Letters. Today, Ash discusses the importance of time and finding out what priorities are important.

Time Stamps:

[1:25] - Leaders have the unique ability to be able to control their time.

[2:00] - Instead of saying "I didn't have time" say "that wasn't a priority" then reflect on what you did instead.

[5:20] - Ash introduces himself and tells us about his professional background.

[7:00] - Bo recounts how he and Ash met.

[8:00] - With his health failing and wanting to recap his life, Ash's father wrote letters to various people in his life.

[14:00] - Young leaders should find people who speak the truth even when they don't want to hear it.

[14:20] - The first letter in Ash's book, A Life Through Letters, is to a man nicknamed Stone Man.

[17:00] - A lesson about empathy can be learned from the letter to the Stone Man.

[19:30] - As we all age our perspective of each other changes.

[21:31] - Ash reflects on which letter from his book is his favorite.

[25:00] - Many readers have told Ash that his book has inspired them to write letters to people in their life.

[28:15] - In a digital world, writing a letter can seem so permanent and the fear of making a mistake can scare people into not starting. 

[32:42] Ash wraps up with how to find him online.

Links:

A Life Through Letters by Ash Davis

Ash's website: A Life Through Letters

Ash's Ted Talk: The Power of Written Communication in a Technological Age

Being passionately curious and taking risks are just two of the key lessons that John Davison, Program Director at WHWK taught me when I was a teenager. I've carried those lessons and so many more with me throughout my entire journey as an accidental leader.

Today, I wish I could have John on the show with me but due to scheduling conflicts, it's not possible. Instead, you'll hear me share some of the lessons John taught me about being a leader.

Time Stamps:

[1:00] - Change of plans. Due to a scheduling conflict John Davison won't be joining Bo today.

[4:45] - Why did John hire 15-year-old Bo and put him on the air?

[7:09] - Bo recounts how John took time out of his day to teach him the skills he needed.

[8:00] - We hear about all the people that John mentored over the years.

[11:08] - You can come up with the best business plan ever, but it takes people to build it.

[13:50] - It's important to hire other leaders who are people people.

[14:30] - Listening to your team members and keeping an open mind about honest feedback makes you a better leader.

[17:15] - When a team member brings you a problem. Ask them to come with a solution.

[18:02] - The importance of being passionately curious.

[21:15] - Bo remembers a time when John was looking towards the future and took a risk to stand out.

[24:43] - John was a quiet leader – the anti-Steve Jobs.

[26:10] - Take risks and invest time on people you see high potential in.

Links:

DiSC Profile

Chris Locurto