PART 1.  In this one, I'm talking about (well... rambling on, really) a lightbulb moment I had in May 2022, which I've never got out of my head. A long term dream. BUT, it seems that it's only now that I'm ready for it to come to fruition. Why? Because certain experiences needed to be experienced first, for me to gain clarity about why the dream happened in the first place... Hindsight eh!

This plan of action, I'm hoping, will provide me with the sensory, social and financial security I have always needed, without realising. And only now, after my dual diagnosis of AuDHD, do I understand why I was always in such a miserable pickle, living the way I have been living! 

The Actualising Woman 🪴 is a raw, unfiltered diary of life after my late diagnosis of ASD & ADHD (AuDHD) and a mental breakdown at 58 🌸 I share my journey of living unmasked, rebuilding a congruent identity, and creating a life that truly fits ME, inspired by Carl Rogers’ Theory of Actualisation.
This channel is about growth, self-acceptance, and becoming a fully functioning, authentic, neurodivergent woman, and I hope my journey supports others walking a similar path 🌱

If YOU are navigating late-diagnosed ADHD, autism, or AuDHD 🌼, or rebuilding after a breakdown, you’ll find community, understanding and hope here 🌺Subscribe for unmasked chat about AuDHD, mental health and self-actualisation 🌷

☕Girl needs COFFEE! Please donate ANY amount, so that I can do this full time?! Thank you!
https://buymeacoffee.com/theactualisingwoman

Contact: [email protected] for requests, feedback, questions and  stories for the show

🎧Check Out!!... STUDY SLEEP SOOTHE - Our Sound Podcast for ASD, ADHD & AuDHD-ers.  Available on Apple & Amazon Music

Clare Llewellyn-Bailey: Counselling psychotherapist, podcaster, empty-nester, and AuDHD-er!!

Support the show

How Does Congruence Help You Unmask as an ASD ADHD -er? - A Core Condition for Actualising The Ideal 'You'. I talk about how masking goes against your congruent self.. causing distress and misalignment.

The Actualising Woman 🪴 is a raw, unfiltered diary of life after my late diagnosis of ASD & ADHD (AuDHD) and a mental breakdown at 58 🌸 I share my journey of living unmasked, rebuilding a congruent identity, and creating a life that truly fits ME,  inspired by Carl Rogers’ Theory of Actualisation.
This channel is about growth, self-acceptance, and becoming a fully functioning, authentic, neurodivergent woman, and I hope my journey supports others walking a similar path 🌱

If YOU are navigating late-diagnosed ADHD, autism, or AuDHD 🌼, or rebuilding after a breakdown, you’ll find community, understanding and hope here 🌺Subscribe for unmasked chat about AuDHD, mental health and self-actualisation 🌷

☕Girl needs COFFEE! Please donate ANY amount, so that I can do this full time?! Thank you!
https://buymeacoffee.com/theactualisingwoman

Contact: [email protected] for requests, feedback, questions and  stories for the show

🎧Check Out!!... STUDY SLEEP SOOTHE - Our Sound Podcast for ASD, ADHD & AuDHD-ers.  Available on Apple & Amazon Music

Clare Llewellyn-Bailey: Counselling psychotherapist, podcaster, empty-nester, and AuDHD-er!!

Support the show

How I'm Helping Myself Unmask and Process My ADHD, ASD Diagnosis - Self Parenting + The Actualising Tendency Carl Rogers. Here's the story of how Carl Rogers came to learn about The Actualising Tendency! AND why he developed his theory of The Three Conditions required by therapists (and yourself) to create the PERFECT environment in which a person/you can thrive, heal, grow, reach full potential and ACTUALISE  

This theory will underpin my journey towards actualisation. What's my PLAN?! How will I do it??

The Actualising Woman 🪴 is a raw, unfiltered diary of life after my late diagnosis of ASD & ADHD (AuDHD) and a mental breakdown at 58 🌸 I share my journey of living unmasked, rebuilding a congruent identity, and creating a life that truly fits ME,  inspired by Carl Rogers’ Theory of Actualisation.
This channel is about growth, self-acceptance, and becoming a fully functioning, authentic, neurodivergent woman, and I hope my journey supports others walking a similar path 🌱

If YOU are navigating late-diagnosed ADHD, autism, or AuDHD 🌼, or rebuilding after a breakdown, you’ll find community, understanding and hope here 🌺Subscribe for unmasked chat about AuDHD, mental health and self-actualisation 🌷

☕Girl needs COFFEE! Please donate ANY amount, so that I can do this full time?! Thank you!
https://buymeacoffee.com/theactualisingwoman

Contact: [email protected] for requests, feedback, questions and  stories for the show

🎧Check Out!!... STUDY SLEEP SOOTHE - Our Sound Podcast for ASD, ADHD & AuDHD-ers.  Available on Apple & Amazon Music

Clare Llewellyn-Bailey: Counselling psychotherapist, podcaster, empty-nester, and AuDHD-er!!

Support the show

This episode is fully loaded! I talk about how having experienced trauma in childhood (and adulthood) alongside undiagnosed ADHD and ASD, had led me to my recent mental health breakdown. Heavy topics which I have only just touched on in this episode, but give an outline of what (I believe) have caused this life-changing experience. I talk about what I'm learning that I need to change about myself, so that I can live more healthily, authentically, in the world as an unmasked late-diagnosed woman. I am aiming for actualisation - and the first step to that is finding out who I am, how I take care of my emotional and physical needs, and what I need to ultimately survive and thrive!

The Actualising Woman 🪴 is a raw, unfiltered diary of life after my late diagnosis of ASD & ADHD (AuDHD) and a mental breakdown at 58 🌸 I share my journey of living unmasked, rebuilding a congruent identity, and creating a life that truly fits ME,  inspired by Carl Rogers’ Theory of Actualisation.
This channel is about growth, self-acceptance, and becoming a fully functioning, authentic, neurodivergent woman, and I hope my journey supports others walking a similar path 🌱

If YOU are navigating late-diagnosed ADHD, autism, or AuDHD 🌼, or rebuilding after a breakdown, you’ll find community, understanding and hope here 🌺Subscribe for unmasked chat about AuDHD, mental health and self-actualisation 🌷

☕Girl needs COFFEE! Please donate ANY amount, so that I can do this full time?! Thank you!
https://buymeacoffee.com/theactualisingwoman

Contact: [email protected] for requests, feedback, questions and  stories for the show

🎧Check Out!!... STUDY SLEEP SOOTHE - Our Sound Podcast for ASD, ADHD & AuDHD-ers.  Available on Apple & Amazon Music

Clare Llewellyn-Bailey: Counselling psychotherapist, podcaster, empty-nester, and AuDHD-er!!

Support the show

Starting to Come Back to Myself - My NEW Self - Breakdown to Breakthrough as an AuDHD-er. I talk about how I move into an assessment phase, despite still feeling very vulnerable, emotional, sad and distressed. I assess Version 1 (the old Clare:  the masker, the people-pleaser, etc) into Version 2, the Clare who has NO IDEA how to be unmasked in this world and knowing I cannot go back to V1 of myself. I can't get the toothpaste back in the tube!! The horse has bolted now and there's no way I can re-mask myself.

Includes: life review, dissociation (detachment from reality and time) and executive function malfunctioning!    

The Actualising Woman 🪴 is a raw, unfiltered diary of life after my late diagnosis of ASD & ADHD (AuDHD) and a mental breakdown at 58 🌸 I share my journey of living unmasked, rebuilding a congruent identity, and creating a life that truly fits ME,  inspired by Carl Rogers’ Theory of Actualisation.
This channel is about growth, self-acceptance, and becoming a fully functioning, authentic, neurodivergent woman, and I hope my journey supports others walking a similar path 🌱

If YOU are navigating late-diagnosed ADHD, autism, or AuDHD 🌼, or rebuilding after a breakdown, you’ll find community, understanding and hope here 🌺Subscribe for unmasked chat about AuDHD, mental health and self-actualisation 🌷

☕Girl needs COFFEE! Please donate ANY amount, so that I can do this full time?! Thank you!
https://buymeacoffee.com/theactualisingwoman

Contact: [email protected] for requests, feedback, questions and  stories for the show

🎧Check Out!!... STUDY SLEEP SOOTHE - Our Sound Podcast for ASD, ADHD & AuDHD-ers.  Available on Apple & Amazon Music

Clare Llewellyn-Bailey: Counselling psychotherapist, podcaster, empty-nester, and AuDHD-er!!

Support the show

Falling into Breakdown. In this episode, I talk candidly about what caused my 'crash' into being mentally and physically incapacitated for 13+ weeks after months and years of extreme stress and worry. But what was the final straw? 

Includes: life review, dissociation (detachment from reality and time) and executive function malfunctioning!    

Trigger Warning - This one is a bit sad and dark, so if you're feeling wobbly, maybe give this episode a swerve!

The Actualising Woman 🪴 is a raw, unfiltered diary of life after my late diagnosis of ASD & ADHD (AuDHD) and a mental breakdown at 58 🌸 I share my journey of living unmasked, rebuilding a congruent identity, and creating a life that truly fits ME,  inspired by Carl Rogers’ Theory of Actualisation.
This channel is about growth, self-acceptance, and becoming a fully functioning, authentic, neurodivergent woman, and I hope my journey supports others walking a similar path 🌱

If YOU are navigating late-diagnosed ADHD, autism, or AuDHD 🌼, or rebuilding after a breakdown, you’ll find community, understanding and hope here 🌺Subscribe for unmasked chat about AuDHD, mental health and self-actualisation 🌷

☕Girl needs COFFEE! Please donate ANY amount, so that I can do this full time?! Thank you!
https://buymeacoffee.com/theactualisingwoman

Contact: [email protected] for requests, feedback, questions and  stories for the show

🎧Check Out!!... STUDY SLEEP SOOTHE - Our Sound Podcast for ASD, ADHD & AuDHD-ers.  Available on Apple & Amazon Music

Clare Llewellyn-Bailey: Counselling psychotherapist, podcaster, empty-nester, and AuDHD-er!!

Support the show

My AuDHD Diagnosis How Did THAT happen? Late Diagnosis Journey

The Actualising Woman 🪴 is a raw, unfiltered diary of life after my late diagnosis of ASD & ADHD (AuDHD) and a mental breakdown at 58 🌸 I share my journey of living unmasked, rebuilding a congruent identity, and creating a life that truly fits ME,  inspired by Carl Rogers’ Theory of Actualisation.
This channel is about growth, self-acceptance, and becoming a fully functioning, authentic, neurodivergent woman, and I hope my journey supports others walking a similar path 🌱

If YOU are navigating late-diagnosed ADHD, autism, or AuDHD 🌼, or rebuilding after a breakdown, you’ll find community, understanding and hope here 🌺Subscribe for unmasked chat about AuDHD, mental health and self-actualisation 🌷

☕Girl needs COFFEE! Please donate ANY amount, so that I can do this full time?! Thank you!
https://buymeacoffee.com/theactualisingwoman

Contact: [email protected] for requests, feedback, questions and  stories for the show

🎧Check Out!!... STUDY SLEEP SOOTHE - Our Sound Podcast for ASD, ADHD & AuDHD-ers.  Available on Apple & Amazon Music

Clare Llewellyn-Bailey: Counselling psychotherapist, podcaster, empty-nester, and AuDHD-er!!

Support the show

INTRODUCTION to The Actualising Woman... what to expect

The Actualising Woman 🪴is an unfiltered, raw diary of life after my late-diagnosis of ASD and ADHD (AuDHD) and a mental breakdown in 2025 at age 58 🌸

I talk candidly about how I’m learning to live unmasked, rebuilding a congruent identity and search for a life that finally fits ME (however unconventional and 'off the beaten track' it might seem!) so that I can freely become a fully functioning and actualising woman; and hopefully, helping you along the way too…🌱

I’m a counsellor trained in person-centred therapy, and I’m totally inspired by Carl Rogers (the king of person-centred therapy) and also his daughter Natalie Rogers who herself was an art therapist and wrote a fantastic book about her journey through the later stages of her life after HER life changing event.  

And so, I’m focusing my future significant life-change ahead around Carl Rogers’ Theory of Actualisation 🌱 and his outline of changes and self-development we might ALL need to make, to be able to move towards becoming actualised… aka becoming a ‘Fully Functioning Person'.  

In simple terms, I'm creating for myself the best possible environment in which I can thrive, reach my fullest potential and for once, after decades of highly masking, (to my detriment) I can learn to accept myself for who I am as a neurodivergent, and live congruently, UNMASKED🌸🌱

If YOU are navigating late-diagnosed ADHD, autism, or AuDHD 🌼, or rebuilding after a breakdown, you’ll find community, understanding and hope here 🌺Subscribe for unmasked chat about AuDHD, mental health and self-actualisation 🌷

☕Girl needs COFFEE! Please donate ANY amount, so that I can do this full time?! Thank you!
https://buymeacoffee.com/theactualisingwoman

Contact: [email protected] for requests, feedback, questions and  stories for the show

🎧Check Out!!... STUDY SLEEP SOOTHE - Our Sound Podcast for ASD, ADHD & AuDHD-ers.  Available on Apple & Amazon Music

Clare Llewellyn-Bailey: Counselling psychotherapist, podcaster, empty-nester, and AuDHD-er!!

Support the show