The Alissa Alter Show

It takes a lot to leave me speechless. I'm a talker. And today's guest Elana Bell did it twice. Today she shares her empowered cesarean story and how she took something so medicalized and made it sacred. How she created space to grieve the birth she'd wanted and the version of herself who had to die in order for her to be reborn in motherhood.

Elana Bell is the author of Mother Country (BOA Editions 2020), poems about fertility, motherhood, and mental illness. Bell is also the founder of the Mother Artist Salon. In addition to facilitating her own Creative Fire workshops, Elana teaches poetry to actors at the Juilliard School and sings with the Resistance Revival Chorus, a group of womxn activists and musicians committed to bringing joy and song to the resistance movement. Learn more about Elana and her work at www.elana.bell.com and click here for the show notes and to learn more about me, what I do, and why I do it.

We have to stop leaving the mother out of the equation. That is exactly what happens when we ask "When are you having a baby?" This simple question, often well intentioned, completely removes and ignores the birthing person. You never know where someone is on their fertility journey, their marital satisfaction, or emotional and physical recovery from birth trauma.

Today's episode provides an update on my physical and emotional recovery from my traumatic birth two years ago and an invitation into how I'm considering a second pregnancy. It's big, it's juicy, and I definitely start crying. I can't wait to hear how this resonates for you. Learn more about me, what I do, and why I do it over at www.alissa-alter.com and check out the show notes while you're there. You can also follow along on IG @alissaalter

"If you feel like you're doing everything, you're doing too much." -Gemma Hartley. Have you ever been reading a book and got mad at the protagonist? Because you can't believe they are tolerating what they are tolerating and not advocating for themselves? I felt that way when I started Fed Up: Emotional Labor, Women, and the Way Forward written by today's guest Gemma Hartley. It didn't take long for me to realize I wasn't mad AT her, I was mad WITH and FOR her. Her writing, her story, is so beyond relatable it feels like you're reading your own journal. Today we talk about how motherhood is often assumed to be synonymous with martyrdom, the pressure of "motherhood intuition," and wondering where the hell "fatherly intuition" comes into play. Gemma Hartley is a freelance journalist and the author. She is passionate about creating a more equitable world in which invisible labor is valued and supported by both personal partners and public policy alike. Learn more about Gemma at www.gemmahartley.com and follow her on instagram at @gemmalhartley. More info in the shownotes here.

Download your free guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy & Postpartum here. Want to connect with me further? Follow me on instagram and join our private Facebook community Mom's Club. Want to learn more about what I do and why I do it? Are you looking to elevate your pregnancy and postpartum experience? Visit me www.alissa-alter.com

This week's solo episode honors the Jewish New Year and the opportunity to reflect, repent, and recommit to creation. This past year has taught me a lot about my white privilege, my Jewish identity, and how I tend to put my head down, work myself into the ground, and then look up not knowing where I am. Sometimes somewhere I definitely don't want to be. It happened with my first marriage, it happened with my theatrical career, and it almost happened again recently. Thankfully I'm beginning to see the patterns, catching myself before complete and total meltdown, and holding boundaries around my energy. That's why I'm starting a new FREE workshop series to Review & Renew each month. If we want to keep growing and evolving we have to check in with ourselves. Do our past decisions and goals still align in our current self? And when we move forward, we will leave things we can't know now. So we have to make sure we are still aligned. Always. Message me at www.alissa-alter.com to RSVP to the workshops and learn more about what I do and why I do it.

Download your free guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy & Postpartum here. Want to connect with me further? Follow me on instagram and join our private Facebook community Mom's Club. Want to learn more about what I do and why I do it? Are you looking to elevate your pregnancy and postpartum experience? Visit me www.alissa-alter.com

Welcome back! I met today's guest Blair Badenhop through mutual friends before signing up for her incredible business mentorship program Your Wellness Brand. Well, we hit it off in a big way and she is now my co-founder along with Anne (our other co-founder and guest on episode 21 who ALSO did YWB with Blair).

Blair is a global Brand & Messaging Strategist with over a decade of experience supporting entrepreneurs and small businesses. Her clients have included Emmy Award Winners, New York Times Best-Selling Authors, and hundreds of coaches and content creators from Australia to the Netherlands. She is the host of the Brand Yourself Podcast where she guides her listeners to lean into their authenticity and shares the journeys of renowned spiritual teachers, doctors, and wellness entrepreneurs alike. Formerly, she worked at Harper's Bazaar, Dress for Success Worldwide, The Institute for Integrative Nutrition, and Parsley Health.

Blair is also the co-founder and CEO of pstprtm, an idea that was born once she realized there wasn't a space for women to find holistic guidance and resources easily. I am so excited to share today's episode where we dive into the power of the pause. Taking a breath and assessing before reacting. And if you find yourself as in love with Blair as I am, you can learn more about her at www.blairbendhop.com, follow her on instagram @blairbadenhop, or over on @pstprtm where she is the one responsible for our GORGEOUS feed. Seriously, it's beautiful.

Download your free guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy & Postpartum here. Want to connect with me further? Follow me on instagram and join our private Facebook community Mom's Club. Want to learn more about what I do and why I do it? Are you looking to elevate your pregnancy and postpartum experience? Visit me www.alissa-alter.com

Sex changes things. It escalates good things and bad things and I want to make sure our emotional intimacy is at the point where sex is our right next step to be to grow our intimacy. Does that make sense?

This episode is not graphic, so you don't need to be nervous. I promise this is a safe space. I do use anatomical correct names for a few body parts, but our conversation today is really more about intimacy and how/when/why we choose to express and share that. And how/when/why we choose to express that intimacy physically. With ourselves and our partners. Now that we are all on the same page, a friendly reminder that I am not a doctor or therapist. These are insights I am sharing as divorced, remarried, mom of one who learned a lot about sex by having none of it during my first marriage and then having a whole bunch of it after that.

Download your free guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy & Postpartum here. Want to connect with me further? Follow me on instagram and join our private Facebook community Mom's Club. Want to learn more about what I do and why I do it? Are you looking to elevate your pregnancy and postpartum experience? Visit me www.alissa-alter.com

Today's guest is a magical mermaid maiden that I am honored to call cofounder of pstprtm Anne Omland. We met through our other cofounder Blair Badenhop and immediately sparks flew. We are so aligned and so different and seriously, she has mermaid hair. Today we are talking about losing your shit as a mom and trying to find it again. And I urge you to listen until the end. Her definition of motherhood is...beyond.

Anne is a co-founder and CXO of pstprtm, a media company and community space on a mission to revolutionize the postpartum experience. She's a Yoga & Meditation Teacher, Hypnobirthing Childbirth Educator, Women's Health Coach, Doula-in-training and the master of creating sacred, healing experiences for mamas and mamas to be. In her other business Mamakind, she creates personalized wellness plans that care for the whole woman on her journey to motherhood, bridging the gaps from standard care. Learn more about Anne at www.mamakind.co and follow her on instagram @wearemamakind

Download your free guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy & Postpartum here. Want to connect with me further? Follow me on instagram and join our private Facebook community Mom's Club. Want to learn more about what I do and why I do it? Are you looking to elevate your pregnancy and postpartum experience? Visit me www.alissa-alter.com

In honor of our 20th episode I want to share with you the three things you need to know about YOUR body. Because you only get one, let's honor her well. I believe that movement, self expressions, and good old fashion education empower us to feel safe, confident, and knowledgeable in our bodies. And we need to get in touch with OUR bodies. Not someone else's, but our own. And when you want to share your body with someone else, you need to know what you're up to!!! And in celebration of our 20th episode and thank you for coming back each week and sharing Myth of Motherhood, I have something for you! Listen to the episode to find out what it is!

Download your free guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy & Postpartum here. Want to connect with me further? Follow me on instagram and join our private Facebook community Mom's Club. Want to learn more about what I do and why I do it? Are you looking to elevate your pregnancy and postpartum experience? Visit me www.alissa-alter.com

Like many pregnant people, Chloe Campbell (She/Her) spent a lot of time and energy connecting to her body and her baby. Culturally we idealize "natural" birth when we mean an unmedicated, vaginal birth. In this episode we talk about this ideal and how it morphs and changes once we give birth, and all along the way no one really considers the pregnancy. It's all about the baby. Speaking of babies, you may hear some backup vocals from Chloe's incredible one year old daughter Campbell during the episode.

Chloe hails from London, UK. She has lived in NYC for 10 years and guesses now she can call it home! She is a performer who has been in multiple musicals in London's West End and on Broadway. In addition to being the mother of Campbell she is one of the hosts of the podcast Mutha... Chloe was five months pregnant when we went into lockdown in NYC and has a lot to say when it comes to being pregnant, giving birth and parenting through a pandemic! Follow Chloe on instagram @chloe.s.campbell and stay up to date with Mutha @muthalove_.

Download your free guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy & Postpartum here. Want to connect with me further? Follow me on instagram and join our private Facebook community Mom's Club. Want to learn more about what I do and why I do it? Are you looking to elevate your pregnancy and postpartum experience? Visit me www.alissa-alter.com

In theater, when there are children in a show the company hires a "Child Wrangler." This person manages the children to make sure they are in costume and make their entrances on time. That they have snacks and water. And that they know all of their lines and choreography. When you become an adult, the Dance Captain and Stage Manager fill this role. It wasn't until after I semi-retired from the biz that I realized I've been "wrangled" or "managed" my entire life. I was left a completely disempowered woman unable to carry the weight of my own life. And while I know I will f*ck Everett up somehow, we started weight training from day one. I want him to know and trust he is strong enough to carry anything that comes his way. Through our training we developed deep trust, security, and strength together. And individually.

Download your free guide to the 20 Things No One Tells You About Pregnancy & Postpartum here. Want to connect with me further? Follow me on instagram and join our private Facebook community Mom's Club. Want to learn more about what I do and why I do it? Are you looking to elevate your pregnancy and postpartum experience? Visit me www.alissa-alter.com