It’s back to Ovid this week in the bunker for two more ingenious tales of transformation. We start in Book I by chewing our cud and patting our 8 tummies. It's the tragic bovine metamorphosis of Io, and the mournful response of her father, Inachus. Here we see the first internal writer and reader within the poem, as daughter reveals herself to dad by hoof-scratching her name in the dirt. Is this also the origin of Roman mourning rites? Then it’s a sylvan sashay back to the woods, where Jupiter (once again) is up to no good and Juno is (once again) directing her vengeance elsewhere, turning Callisto, her husband’s unwilling (once again) paramour, into a bear. What kind of gods are these?  What place for mortals in all this? Is the transformation into a part of nature a blessing or a curse? And finally, has anyone located the edible, pulverized, skeletal muscle portion of the bullock?