FaZe Clan is a video game team that now has a publicly traded stock. Amazon just jumped into your doctor’s office by acquiring One Medical (“paging Dr. Bezos”). And AT&T stock had its worst day in 20 years because you paid your phone bill a day late… and so did everyone else.

$FAZE $ONEM $AMZN $T

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Amazon is suing the people behind 10,000 Facebook Groups for their fake review schemes because we all pay the Bot Tax. Mules shoes have jumped from women’s fashion to men’s, because under every active fad is a sleeping trend. And yesterday, air conditioner stocks popped because they’re the duct tape of Climate Change. Today, we’ve found the Hail Mary of Climate Change… It’s known as Fusion.

$FL $AMZN $CROX

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KFC is launching their first chicken nugget in their 92 year history — because the window for their chicken loyalty is closing fast. With extreme heat ravaging Europe, people are turning to climate change duct tape: Air Conditioners. And Netflix’s shrinkage continued for a second-straight quarter, so it should initiate Code Red: Make Fewer Shows. 

$YUM $NFLX $CARR

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A judge just ruled that Subway can be sued over its tuna sandwich… So it’s time to discuss “The Barbra Streisand Effect.” After 10 years, Snapchat just launched on a web version — and it’s a Zoom-eater. And airline’s just reported earnings, which can be summed up with one single flight: Delta flew a plane from London to Detroit only filled with lost bags.

$SNAP $DAL $UAL $AAL

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Beyonce has finally joined TikTok, but the real story here is how TikTok’s beating Google. The NYTimes and Hasbro are turning Wordle into a physical board game, because they’re playing chess while their copycats play checkers. And Big Tech’s management style is taking a page from old school Jack Welch: Less “Cool Mom,” more “Hunger Games.”

$HAS $NYT $GOOG $META

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Budweiser was the exclusive beer sponsor of the Super Bowl until today — and that made Molson Coors the most creative beer in advertising. The founder of Oculus has a new plan: Become Iron Man (he’s pulling a Tony Stark in real life). And if you enjoy the heated seats in a BMW, you’re gonna have to pay extra for them… because BMW is jumping into Fee-tail with a Fee-ocracy.

$TAP $BUD $BMWYY $META

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Tinder just acquired a dating app so exclusive, we couldn’t even jump in TBOY-style — Because dating isn’t about love, it’s about time. Ducks… Cavemen… and the Geico Gecko… There is a secret strategy behind insurance mascots and sports. Inflation just hit a level so high, we’re going full myth-busters on how we can lower gas prices.

$MTCH $KHC $BRK.A $PRU\

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Trivia: What startup did Spotify just acquire? Answer: A music trivia game that rhymes with Wordle (because “discovery” is audio’s biggest problem). Pepsi just revealed a shockingly strong quarter because it’s double-dipping its chips — and we’re letting them do it. And American tourists traveling to Europe are about to enjoy 18% off everything, but there are 2 sides to every coin (literally).

$PEP $SPOT

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Elon Musk is canceling his deal with Twitter and here’s how we’re visualizing it: A house with termites. Truff created the most expensive hot sauce on earth, and it’s because Truff created an Instagram handle before it created a sauce. And 124,000 pages of secret Uber files just leaked that reveal just how dirty Uber’s “Move Fast & Break Things” Playbook got: “We’re illegal.” 

$UBER $KHC $TWTR $TSLA

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The price of everything is going up… except for the $1.50 Costco Hot Dog & Soda combo (because the co-founder will kill the CEO if it’s a penny more). HBO just made one of the biggest changes in TV ad history: Commercials you won’t hate. And SpaceX just launched wifi for yachts because it’s building Invisible Infrastructure.

$COST $WBD $TSLA

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