Summary:

This episode explores the emotional shock many midlife women feel when they drop a child off at college and come home to a quieter house. Dr. Natalie reframes empty nesting as more than just missing a child - it can be a loss of role, identity, and a long-standing way of getting needs met. She also connects this transition to grief, self-worth, caregiving patterns, and the need to build a new relationship with yourself as kids become independent.

Key words and Phrases

• ​empty nesting
• ​grief
• ​identity loss
• ​motherhood
• ​caregiving
• ​self-worth
• ​pattern interrupt
• ​self-abandonment
• ​midlife transition
• ​perimenopause
• ​inner critic
• ​rebuilding yourself
• ​self-reflection

Quotes:

• ​“The reward to being a good parent is that they're gonna eventually not be in our lives every day."
• ​“The person you're gonna pick up and caretake for the rest of your life, that's you.”
• ​“Self-abandonment is not a great way to manage grief and loss.”
• ​“What hurts is not just the child leaving, but the loss of being needed.”
• ​The inner critic often shows up when you’re trying something new.”
• ​“The work now is building a relationship with yourself.”

Key topics

• ​Empty nesting can feel intolerable because it is not only separation, it is a major identity disruption.
• ​Dr. Natalie says many women are grieving the loss of the mom role, not just the child leaving home.
• ​If self-worth has been tied to being a “good mom,” empty nesting can trigger a crisis of identity.
• ​Some women have also used parenting as the main way they have ever felt loved, which makes the transition even harder.
• ​Parenting may have functioned as a coping strategy to numb old wounds, especially for women who grew up in emotionally barren families.
• ​Her central message is that the path forward is building a relationship with yourself through reflection, counseling, new friendships, and honest self-inquiry.

Timestamps

(00:00) Why empty nesting hits so hard in midlife(01:22) The grief of letting kids go(03:46) When over-contacting children can damage the relationship(04:16) Grieving the role, not just the child(05:44) When worthiness gets tied to caregiving(08:06) Parenting as a source of being loved(09:03) Grief as a recurring process, not a single emotion(10:03) Building a relationship with yourself(11:28) Parenting as a way to avoid other unresolved issues(12:18) Why counseling or coaching can help in this transition(13:39) How Gen X women were trained to hide needs(14:38) Midlife, menopause, and lower distress tolerance(16:31) Why caretaker dynamics strain adult relationships(18:27) Relearning relationships and needs outside the family role(20:48) Empty nesting as a pattern interrupt(21:47) Moving through transition with less resilience(23:15) Journaling, reflection, and making space for self-knowledge(24:42) The inner critic as a sign of change, not failure(27:09) Giving yourself permission to grieve(28:32) Reorganizing life around your own needs(29:31) Why self-abandonment makes adjustment harder

DISCLAIMER:

The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠,⁠⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums.

If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠or CALL 988

Crisis Text Line:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠or Text HOME to 741741

Summary:

Dr. Natalie explores how childhood trauma and cultural conditioning influence women's relationships in midlife, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness and self-compassion to foster healthier connections and personal growth.

Previous episode referenced in today's podcast: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0UrV8UKGgDdedTdw50BUdM?si=HphWMDhFTpCeMN4nJTsbNg

Keywords

midlife, relationships, childhood trauma, self-awareness, self-compassion, women, emotional health, neurochemistry, estrogen, codependency

Key topics

• Impact of childhood trauma on adult relationships
• Neurochemical changes during perimenopause
• The role of estrogen in emotional resilience
• Patterns of codependency and caretaking
• The importance of self-awareness and self-compassion
• Cultural influences on women's self-worth
• Strategies for breaking unhealthy relationship cycles
• The significance of therapy and self-reflection

Takeaways:

• Childhood trauma creates ingrained relationship patterns that persist into midlife.
• Estrogen decline in perimenopause reduces stress tolerance and can exacerbate emotional challenges.
• Self-awareness and self-compassion are crucial for recognizing and changing harmful patterns.
• Many women unconsciously conflate being needed with being loved due to early life conditioning.
• Healing involves understanding the origins of these patterns and actively working to rewrite them.

Sound bites

• "Unhelpful patterns from childhood still shape us."
• "Estrogen decline reduces stress tolerance."
• "Neurochemicals protect us, but they fade in midlife."

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to childhood friendships and midlife reflections

3555:31:04 Recognizing unhelpful relationship patterns in midlife

7083:17:58 The role of childhood caretaking and its influence on adult patterns

10722:11:40 The neurochemical effects of estrogen decline in perimenopause

14249:58:30 Resentment and relational patterns in women during midlife

17833:18:40 Understanding the origins of relationship behaviors and patterns

19944:25:31 The unprecedented nature of women's midlife experiences today

20638:52:16 Personal stories of escaping dysfunctional family environments

22083:18:59 The importance of self-awareness and self-compassion in healing

23555:32:22 The neurochemical and emotional impact of estrogen decline

251111:05:48 The cycle of resentment and codependency in midlife women

274722:12:33 Changing relationship patterns through awareness and intentionality

288611:05:58 Recognizing residual patterns and the need for self-investment

309444:26:17 The blueprint of needing to be needed and its effects

316666:39:38 The importance of self-awareness in relationship transformation

337777:46:21 Self-compassion and understanding the origins of patterns

350833:19:46 Releasing shame and embracing growth in midlife

366666:39:47 Seeking therapy and support for healing and change

388888:53:11 The urgency of addressing emotional and psychological health in midlife

395833:19:55 Empowering women to own their midlife journey and transformation

DISCLAIMER:

The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠ ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlife ⁠⁠or CALL 988

Crisis Text Line:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠or Text HOME to 741741

Summary: Dr. Natalie explores the often overlooked topic of grief and loss in midlife, sharing personal stories and practical insights on navigating transitions, relationships, and emotional healing to thrive in this life stage.

Keywords: midlife, grief, loss, relationships, parenting, emotional healing, personal growth, mental health, transitions, self-care

Key Topics

• The role of grief and loss in midlife

• Transition from transactional to relational parenting

• Managing relationships and friendships in midlife

• The importance of feeling and processing emotions

• Self-care and emotional resilience in midlife

Takeaways

• Grief is a natural and necessary part of midlife transitions.

• Moving from transactional to relational parenting requires emotional work.

• Loss of friendships and relationships is common and can be healthy.

• Feeling emotions fully is essential for healing and growth.

• Protecting your energy and setting boundaries is vital in midlife.

Sound Bites

• "Loss is a big part of midlife."

• "Emotions need to be felt."

• "You can't ignore grief; it will wait."

Chapters

00:00Introduction: Grief and Loss in Midlife

02:16Understanding Grief and Loss in Midlife

04:06The Transition from Transactional to Relational Parenting

05:32Dealing with the Emotional Impact of Children Leaving Home

06:28A Personal Parenting Moment and Reflection

07:50The Experience of Residency and Overworking

09:13A Heartfelt Conversation with Her Son

10:39The Importance of Feeling and Processing Emotions

12:05Grieving the End of a Transactional Mothering Role

13:27Building a New Relationship with Her Son

15:17The Concept of Closing the Bones and Transitioning

16:13The Joy of a Centered Midlife

18:07Letting Go of Codependent Behaviors

19:33Embracing the Future and New Possibilities

20:58Healing from Family Trauma and Codependency

22:21The Guilt of Ending Old Relationships

23:44Moving Forward with Self-Compassion

25:41Choosing Self-Care Over Old Patterns

26:40Seeking Support and Professional Help

27:00Disclaimer and Resources for Crisis Support

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠or CALL 988Crisis Text Line:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠or Text HOME to 741741

Summary:

Dr. Natalie shares a personal story about handling petty moments, grief, and the importance of protecting your energy and self-worth during midlife. This episode offers insights into emotional resilience, boundaries, and self-acceptance.

Keywords:

midlife, emotional resilience, boundaries, self-worth, personal growth, grief, self-acceptance, mental health, self-protection, life transitions

Key topics:

• Handling petty moments and emotional triggers
• The importance of boundaries and self-protection
• Grief and loss during midlife
• Self-acceptance and personal growth
• Navigating relationships and social judgments

Takeaways:

• It's normal to feel petty or triggered; what matters is how you handle it.
• Protect your energy fiercely and set boundaries around your self-worth.
• Grief is a layered process, especially during major life transitions.
• Your self-worth is independent of others' opinions or judgments.
• Reframing social judgments as small-mindedness helps maintain emotional resilience.

Sound bites:

• "Growth doesn't mean we don't get triggered."
• "Protect your energy fiercely in midlife."
• "Your self-worth is independent of others' opinions."

Chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Petty Moments and Growth

2972:11:16 Sharing Personal Stories of Divorce and Loss

6999:58:15 The Pain of Being Misjudged and Abandoned

11694:25:11 The Fast Pace of Life and Aging Children

14888:52:05 Grief and Rejection in Midlife

196111:05:39 The Temptation to Be Petty and How to Resist

251666:39:27 Understanding Self-Worth Beyond Roles

296944:26:18 Setting Boundaries and Protecting Your Energy

333888:53:07 The Power of Self-Validation and Moving On

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠or CALL 988Crisis Text Line:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠or Text HOME to 741741

Summary:

Dr. Natalie shares her personal journey through moving, shredding decades of paperwork, and navigating midlife challenges, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness, rest, and intentional living during perimenopause. She aims in this episode to quelch the shame we feel when looking back across our lives and realizing how overfunctioning has come at a high cost.

Keywords:

midlife, perimenopause, self-care, moving, trauma, overfunctioning, regulated nervous system, self-awareness, mental health, personal growth

Key topics:

• Midlife transition and self-awareness
• The significance of rest and self-care during perimenopause
• Personal stories of moving and decluttering as a metaphor for life changes
• Trauma responses and overfunctioning in women
• The importance of creating a sanctuary and setting boundaries

Takeaways:

• Rest is a form of self-love and essential for health during midlife.
• Decluttering can be a powerful act of self-discovery and healing.
• Overfunctioning is often a trauma response that comes at a high personal cost.
• Self-awareness allows for conscious choices that align with one’s well-being.
• Midlife is an opportunity for renewal and creating a life that feels right.

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:Learn to Love Your Story Coaching- ⁠⁠⁠https://learntoloveyourstory.com⁠⁠⁠Dr. Natalie’s Counseling Practice - ⁠⁠⁠https://nataliemarcounseling.com⁠⁠⁠ If you are in MN, book your free 15-minute consultation with Dr. Natalie. Facebook:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Linked In:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok:⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠

Sound bites

• "Looking at it in black and white was profound."
• "Midlife is a miracle, not a crisis."
• "Choose yourself every day."

Chapters

00:00 Navigating Life Transitions

08:32 The Weight of Paperwork and Memories

17:13 The Cost of Overfunctioning

23:19 Choosing Yourself in Midlife

28:35 Creating a Centered Midlife

34:34 Embracing Change and Choice

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠or CALL 988Crisis Text Line:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠or Text HOME to 741741

Summary

This episode explores the challenges faced by the sandwich generation—adults caring for aging parents while managing their own families and careers. Dr. Natalie shares insights on emotional, physical, and financial strains, and offers practical strategies for setting boundaries, seeking support, and prioritizing self-care to navigate this demanding phase of life.

Keywords

sandwich generation, midlife, caregiving, self-care, boundaries, emotional health, physical strain, financial stress, family dynamics, personal growth

Key Topics

• Statistics on adult caregivers and gender differences
• Emotional and physical toll of caregiving
• Financial challenges faced by caregivers
• The shift from transactional to relational caregiving
• Strategies for setting boundaries and seeking support

Takeaways

• Prioritize self-care to sustain caregiving capacity
• Set clear boundaries to protect emotional and physical health
• Seek support and resources to avoid burnout
• Reframe caregiving as an act of self-love and modeling for future generations
• Recognize that saying no is a valid and necessary choice

Sound bites:

• "You're not alone in this."
• "64% report moderate to high emotional strain."
• "Saying no is a valid and necessary choice."

Chapters

• 00:00 Understanding the Sandwich Generation
• 06:22 Financial Strain and Overwork
• 11:19 Setting Boundaries and Self-Care
• 16:39 Modeling Healthy Behaviors for Future Generations

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:Learn to Love Your Story Coaching- ⁠⁠https://learntoloveyourstory.com⁠⁠Dr. Natalie’s Counseling Practice - ⁠⁠https://nataliemarcounseling.com⁠⁠ If you are in MN, book your free 15-minute consultation with Dr. Natalie. Facebook:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠https://www.instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Linked In:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr/⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok:⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@doc.natalieDISCLAIMER:

The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠or CALL 988

Crisis Text Line:⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠or Text HOME to 741741

Summary:

This episode explores the impact of perfectionism, societal conditioning, and hormonal changes during midlife on women's mental health. Dr. Natalie shares data, personal insights, and practical advice to help women love themselves and navigate this transformative phase with resilience.

Keywords:

midlife, women, perfectionism, mental health, hormonal changes, self-love, resilience, menopause, societal conditioning

Key topics:

• ​Perfectionism and its impact on mental health
• ​The connection between hormonal changes and emotional well-being
• ​Societal conditioning and self-betrayal in women
• ​Practical steps to cultivate self-love and resilience

Sound bites:

"Relearn who you are and what you want."

"Deserving love even when you screw up."

"You do not have to be good."

Chapters:

00:00 The Burden of Perfectionism in Midlife

03:24 Understanding the Mental Health Crisis for Women

11:29 The Impact of Hormonal Changes and Medical Misunderstandings

28:13 Reclaiming Self-Worth and Breaking Free from Perfectionism

36:18 Introduction and Disclaimer

37:55 Crisis Resources and Support

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:

Learn to Love Your Story Coaching- ⁠https://learntoloveyourstory.com⁠

Dr. Natalie’s Counseling Practice - ⁠https://nataliemarcounseling.com⁠ If you are in MN, book your free 15-minute consultation with Dr. Natalie.

Facebook:⁠ ⁠⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠⁠⁠Linked In:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok:⁠⁠ ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠⁠⁠

Resources:

Mary Oliver's Wild Geese Poem - https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45587/wild-geese

Women's Health Initiative Study - https://www.nih.gov/news-events/nih-research-matters/women-s-health-initiative

Understanding Perfectionism in Women - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-moment-youth/201911/the-perfectionism-epidemic

Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) Information - https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/menopause/in-depth/hormone-therapy/art-20046372

Disclaimer:

The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with Learn To Love Your Story coaching ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠ and her private practice ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities are educational ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic or coaching services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠CALL 988

Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Episode Summary:

Dr. Natalie explores the psychological and physical factors contributing to the rising divorce rates among women in midlife, emphasizing patterns of behavior, stress, and self-awareness. She offers insights into how women can recognize and shift these patterns to improve their relationships and well-being.

Keywords:

midlife, divorce, women, psychology, self-awareness, patterns, stress, relationships, mental health, self-care

Key topics:

• Statistics on midlife divorce rates
• Psychological patterns in women’s relationships
• Impact of hormones and stress on midlife women

Sound bites:

"The average age of divorce is 45."

"Women initiate 66% of divorces."

"People pleasing patterns are deeply ingrained."

Chapters:

00:00 Understanding Divorce Statistics and Trends

03:23 Psychological Patterns in Midlife Women

16:07 Breaking the Cycle of People-Pleasing

27:47 Empowering Women to Embrace Change

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:

• Learn to Love Your Story Course - https://learntoloveyourstory.com

• Dr. Natalie’s Counseling Practice - https://nataliemarcounseling.com If you are in MN, book your free 15-minute consultation with Dr. Natalie.
• Facebook: ⁠⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory
• ⁠⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr
• ⁠⁠⁠Linked In: ⁠⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠⁠
• Tik Tok:⁠ ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠⁠

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary:

Dr. Natalie explores the impact of childhood trauma, emotional health, and resilience in midlife. She emphasizes the importance of showing up for oneself, understanding trauma beyond the obvious, and building internal resources for a centered midlife.

Keywords: trauma, midlife, emotional health, resilience, childhood experiences, self-worth, connection, coping strategies

Key Topics:

• Trauma and childhood experiences
• The impact of emotional health in midlife
• Strategies for showing up and building resilience

Takeaways:

• Trauma is not just what happens to us but whether we have resources to manage it.
• Showing up for yourself daily is crucial for growth in midlife.
• Connection and empathy are powerful tools for managing emotional distress.
• Understanding your childhood experiences can inform your midlife health.
• Self-compassion and small steps are key to navigating midlife challenges.

Sound bites:

"Being an outsider in childhood can be traumatic"

"Trauma impacts hormones and physical health"

"Good days in midlife are moments to cherish"

Chapters:

00:00 Embracing Midlife Challenges

10:30 The Role of Connection in Healing

18:58 Strategies for Navigating Midlife

21:12 Introduction and Disclaimer

22:49 Crisis Resources and Support

Resources:

• Center for the Study of Trauma and Resilience - https://traumaresilience.org/
• Attachment Theory by John Bowlby - https://www.amazon.com/Attachment-Theory-John-Bowlby/dp/0465026504
• Therapy for Trauma and Emotional Health - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:Website:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook: ⁠⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠⁠Linked In: ⁠⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok:⁠ ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠⁠DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary:

Have you ever found yourself uncontrollably crying? Angry beyond what the situation warrants? Or maybe after years of being an extrovert, you now just want to curl up on the coach and hide from people. Perimenopause is no joke.

Dr. Natalie shares her own personal experience of emotional breakdowns during midlife, explores the science behind trauma and hormonal changes, and offers insights into managing these challenges through therapy and self-awareness.

Keywords: midlife, trauma, hormones, therapy, emotional health, menopause, childhood experience, stress resilience, self-compassion, mental health

Key topics:

• Trauma and midlife emotional health
• The impact of childhood experiences on menopause
• Science of hormones and stress resilience
• Therapeutic approaches for trauma in midlife
• Self-compassion and curiosity in emotional regulation

• Trauma from childhood can resurface in midlife, affecting emotional health.
• Hormonal changes in menopause can exacerbate past trauma effects.
• Therapy and self-awareness are crucial for managing midlife emotional challenges.
• Understanding your ACE score can help predict health risks in midlife.
• Practicing curiosity instead of self-criticism fosters self-compassion.

• Uncovering the Science of Trauma and Hormones in Midlife
• How Childhood Trauma Affects Women in Menopause

Sound bites:

"Some relationships just have a season for themselves."

"I burst into positively never happens."

"If it's hysterical, it's historical."

Chapters:

00:00 Navigating Friendships in Midlife

05:59 Emotional Breakthroughs and Self-Compassion

12:26 Childhood Trauma and Its Impact on Relationships

19:59 The Science of Midlife and Childhood Trauma

30:16 Advocating for Your Health in Midlife

Resources:

• Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) Questionnaire⁠
• ⁠The Swan Study on Women's Health⁠
• ⁠Self-Compassion Course by Dr. Natalie⁠

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Facebook: ⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠Linked In: ⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠Tik Tok: ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741