Summary:

This episode explores the impact of perfectionism, societal conditioning, and hormonal changes during midlife on women's mental health. Dr. Natalie shares data, personal insights, and practical advice to help women love themselves and navigate this transformative phase with resilience.

Keywords:

midlife, women, perfectionism, mental health, hormonal changes, self-love, resilience, menopause, societal conditioning

Key topics:

• ​Perfectionism and its impact on mental health
• ​The connection between hormonal changes and emotional well-being
• ​Societal conditioning and self-betrayal in women
• ​Practical steps to cultivate self-love and resilience

Sound bites:

"Relearn who you are and what you want."

"Deserving love even when you screw up."

"You do not have to be good."

Chapters:

00:00 The Burden of Perfectionism in Midlife

03:24 Understanding the Mental Health Crisis for Women

11:29 The Impact of Hormonal Changes and Medical Misunderstandings

28:13 Reclaiming Self-Worth and Breaking Free from Perfectionism

36:18 Introduction and Disclaimer

37:55 Crisis Resources and Support

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:

Learn to Love Your Story Coaching- ⁠https://learntoloveyourstory.com⁠

Dr. Natalie’s Counseling Practice - ⁠https://nataliemarcounseling.com⁠ If you are in MN, book your free 15-minute consultation with Dr. Natalie.

Facebook:⁠ ⁠⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠⁠⁠Linked In:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok:⁠⁠ ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠⁠⁠

Resources:

Mary Oliver's Wild Geese Poem - https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45587/wild-geese

Women's Health Initiative Study - https://www.nih.gov/news-events/nih-research-matters/women-s-health-initiative

Understanding Perfectionism in Women - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-moment-youth/201911/the-perfectionism-epidemic

Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) Information - https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/menopause/in-depth/hormone-therapy/art-20046372

Disclaimer:

The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with Learn To Love Your Story coaching ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠ and her private practice ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities are educational ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic or coaching services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠CALL 988

Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Episode Summary:

Dr. Natalie explores the psychological and physical factors contributing to the rising divorce rates among women in midlife, emphasizing patterns of behavior, stress, and self-awareness. She offers insights into how women can recognize and shift these patterns to improve their relationships and well-being.

Keywords:

midlife, divorce, women, psychology, self-awareness, patterns, stress, relationships, mental health, self-care

Key topics:

• Statistics on midlife divorce rates
• Psychological patterns in women’s relationships
• Impact of hormones and stress on midlife women

Sound bites:

"The average age of divorce is 45."

"Women initiate 66% of divorces."

"People pleasing patterns are deeply ingrained."

Chapters:

00:00 Understanding Divorce Statistics and Trends

03:23 Psychological Patterns in Midlife Women

16:07 Breaking the Cycle of People-Pleasing

27:47 Empowering Women to Embrace Change

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:

• Learn to Love Your Story Course - https://learntoloveyourstory.com

• Dr. Natalie’s Counseling Practice - https://nataliemarcounseling.com If you are in MN, book your free 15-minute consultation with Dr. Natalie.
• Facebook: ⁠⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory
• ⁠⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr
• ⁠⁠⁠Linked In: ⁠⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠⁠
• Tik Tok:⁠ ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠⁠

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary:

Dr. Natalie explores the impact of childhood trauma, emotional health, and resilience in midlife. She emphasizes the importance of showing up for oneself, understanding trauma beyond the obvious, and building internal resources for a centered midlife.

Keywords: trauma, midlife, emotional health, resilience, childhood experiences, self-worth, connection, coping strategies

Key Topics:

• Trauma and childhood experiences
• The impact of emotional health in midlife
• Strategies for showing up and building resilience

Takeaways:

• Trauma is not just what happens to us but whether we have resources to manage it.
• Showing up for yourself daily is crucial for growth in midlife.
• Connection and empathy are powerful tools for managing emotional distress.
• Understanding your childhood experiences can inform your midlife health.
• Self-compassion and small steps are key to navigating midlife challenges.

Sound bites:

"Being an outsider in childhood can be traumatic"

"Trauma impacts hormones and physical health"

"Good days in midlife are moments to cherish"

Chapters:

00:00 Embracing Midlife Challenges

10:30 The Role of Connection in Healing

18:58 Strategies for Navigating Midlife

21:12 Introduction and Disclaimer

22:49 Crisis Resources and Support

Resources:

• Center for the Study of Trauma and Resilience - https://traumaresilience.org/
• Attachment Theory by John Bowlby - https://www.amazon.com/Attachment-Theory-John-Bowlby/dp/0465026504
• Therapy for Trauma and Emotional Health - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:Website:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook: ⁠⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠⁠Linked In: ⁠⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok:⁠ ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠⁠DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary:

Have you ever found yourself uncontrollably crying? Angry beyond what the situation warrants? Or maybe after years of being an extrovert, you now just want to curl up on the coach and hide from people. Perimenopause is no joke.

Dr. Natalie shares her own personal experience of emotional breakdowns during midlife, explores the science behind trauma and hormonal changes, and offers insights into managing these challenges through therapy and self-awareness.

Keywords: midlife, trauma, hormones, therapy, emotional health, menopause, childhood experience, stress resilience, self-compassion, mental health

Key topics:

• Trauma and midlife emotional health
• The impact of childhood experiences on menopause
• Science of hormones and stress resilience
• Therapeutic approaches for trauma in midlife
• Self-compassion and curiosity in emotional regulation

• Trauma from childhood can resurface in midlife, affecting emotional health.
• Hormonal changes in menopause can exacerbate past trauma effects.
• Therapy and self-awareness are crucial for managing midlife emotional challenges.
• Understanding your ACE score can help predict health risks in midlife.
• Practicing curiosity instead of self-criticism fosters self-compassion.

• Uncovering the Science of Trauma and Hormones in Midlife
• How Childhood Trauma Affects Women in Menopause

Sound bites:

"Some relationships just have a season for themselves."

"I burst into positively never happens."

"If it's hysterical, it's historical."

Chapters:

00:00 Navigating Friendships in Midlife

05:59 Emotional Breakthroughs and Self-Compassion

12:26 Childhood Trauma and Its Impact on Relationships

19:59 The Science of Midlife and Childhood Trauma

30:16 Advocating for Your Health in Midlife

Resources:

• Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) Questionnaire⁠
• ⁠The Swan Study on Women's Health⁠
• ⁠Self-Compassion Course by Dr. Natalie⁠

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Facebook: ⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠Linked In: ⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠Tik Tok: ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary

Dr. Natalie explores the intersection of midlife challenges, hormonal changes, and childhood trauma, emphasizing that women's struggles are often systemic and not personal failures. She discusses how hormonal shifts affect stress resilience and the importance of inner work and therapy to achieve a centered midlife.

Keywords

midlife, hormonal changes, childhood trauma, stress resilience, inner child work, therapy, estrogen, progesterone, systemic issues, personal growth

Key topics

• Hormonal changes in midlife and their impact on stress resilience

• The role of childhood trauma in adult midlife struggles

• Inner child work and shadow work as tools for healing

• Systemic societal expectations and their effects on women in midlife

Key frameworks

• Inner Child Work

• Shadow Work

• Core Belief Systems

Action items

• Seek therapy to unpack childhood trauma

• Consider hormone therapy with medical guidance

• Set boundaries to protect your mental health

• Prioritize love and acceptance of your current life

Sound bites

"Childhood trauma can resurface in midlife."

"Love your life right now, all of it."

"This was never your fault."

Chapters

00:00 The Burden of Expectations on Women

13:18 Childhood Trauma and Its Resurgence in Midlife

19:07 Introduction and Disclaimer

20:43 Crisis Resources and Support

Midlife/Trauma Resources:

• Therapy for Trauma and Inner Child Work - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

• Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) - https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/hormone-replacement-therapy

• Understanding Perimenopause and Menopause - https://www.womenshealth.gov/menopause

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:Website: ⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Facebook: ⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠Linked In: ⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠Tik Tok: ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary

In this conversation, Dr. Natalie reflects on her journey through midlife, particularly focusing on the challenges of perimenopause and the emotional turmoil that often accompanies it. She discusses the importance of letting go of societal expectations and the pressure to conform, emphasizing the need for self-acceptance and compassion. Dr. Natalie also explores the concept of procedural memory and how our ingrained habits can shape our perceptions and emotional responses. Ultimately, she encourages listeners to redefine their narratives and embrace a centered midlife, free from the burdens of self-judgment and societal standards.

Episode 117: Expert Advice on Addressing the #1 Symptom in Perimenopause: https://spotifycreators-web.app.link/e/y7WjcCkjf1b or https://youtu.be/GFTFQGbN1rg

Keywords:

midlife, perimenopause, self-acceptance, emotional health, procedural memory, self-compassion, personal growth, women empowerment, mental health, life transitions

Takeaways

• Turning 50 can be a liberating experience.
• It's important to decide what truly matters to us.
• Perimenopause can bring significant emotional challenges.
• Irritability is a common symptom of hormonal changes.
• 95% of our thoughts and behaviors are pre-programmed.
• We can reprogram our thoughts to be more compassionate.
• Self-acceptance is crucial for mental well-being.
• We often hold ourselves to unrealistic standards.
• It's essential to shift our narratives about ourselves.
• You are not broken; you are a work in progress.

Sound bites

"I was waking up that way."

"Tell yourself a new story."

"You are not broken."

Chapters

00:00 Embracing Midlife: A New Perspective

06:35 Reprogramming the Mind: Breaking Free from Old Habits

12:20 Redefining Self-Worth: A Journey to Centered Midlife
Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:Website: ⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Facebook: ⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠Instagram:⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠Linked In: ⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠Tik Tok: ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠⁠DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary

In this conversation, Dr. Natalie discusses the challenges women face during midlife, particularly around wellness shaming, hormonal changes, and the pressure to conform to societal expectations. She emphasizes the importance of introspection and listening to one's body rather than relying solely on external validation and wellness culture. Dr. Natalie encourages women to embrace their individuality and build self-worth from within, acknowledging that it's okay to make mistakes along the way.

Takeaways

• The exhaustion women feel in midlife is real and valid.
• Hormonal changes can create chaos in our bodies, similar to adolescence.
• Habit formation is challenging, especially when trying to adapt to new life phases.
• Introspection is crucial; we should listen to our bodies rather than just external advice.
• Wellness culture often exploits women's insecurities for profit.
• It's important to recognize that each woman's experience is unique.
• Building self-worth from within is essential for navigating midlife.
• It's okay to not have all the answers about what your body needs.
• Listening to your body can lead to better health outcomes than following external advice.
• You are not broken; you are evolving.

Keywords

midlife, wellness, hormones, introspection, self-worth, health, women, perimenopause, wellness culture, body positivity

Sound bites

"The exhaustion is real."

"It's okay to mess it up."

"You are not broken."

Chapters

00:00 The Pressure of Midlife Wellness

06:18 The Challenge of Habit Formation

11:38 Critique of Wellness Culture

21:00 Embracing Your Inner Expert

Resources & Links: Connect with Dr. Natalie:Website ⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ ⁠

Facebook ⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠

Instagram⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠

Linked In ⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠

Tik Tok ⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ CALL 988

Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

In this heartfelt episode, Dr. Natalie addresses midlife women feeling overwhelmed by the pressure to fix and manage everything alone. She offers insight into how hyper-independence and the fear of abandonment can contribute to burnout and midlife struggles—and most importantly, how self-love can help rewrite these patterns.

Key Topics:

• The emotional toll of hyper-independence in midlife women
• The neurochemistry of pursuit and addiction to dopamine hits
• Childhood experiences shaping adult patterns of fixing and pleasing
• Recognizing and interrupting the spiral of justification and validation
• The importance of self-love as an antidote to burnout and scarcity mindset
• How fear of abandonment fuels hyper-independence
• Practical steps to love yourself through mistakes and vulnerabilities
• Moving away from rescuing everyone and focusing on personal peace

Timestamps:00:00 - Addressing hyper-independent women in midlife
02:09 - The neurochemical roots of pursuit and addiction to dopamine
03:34 - How the chase reinforces the cycle of burnout
04:33 - Personal stories of controlling or fixing others
05:58 - Childhood patterns influencing adult need for approval
06:53 - Recognizing the spiral of justifying and validating
08:22 - The pain of not being liked or validated
09:04 - The risks of over-investment in work and relationships
10:30 - How derailments in pursuit reveal deeper patterns
11:56 - The spiral of self-justification in times of stress
13:20 - The link between childhood chaos and adult control issues
14:19 - Self-love as the key to breaking free from cycles
16:41 - The importance of loving yourself despite mistakes
19:34 - Understanding the fear of rejection and scarcity mindset
20:03 - Letting go of blame and the need for approval
21:01 - Managing relationships without spiraling into chaos
22:24 - Embracing age and experience for self-compassion
23:21 - The power of loving your story, including dysfunction
24:19 - Sharing this message with other midlife women
25:17 - Letting go of the cycle of justification and abandonment fears
26:15 - Finding peace and building inner self-worth

Resources & Links: Connect with Dr. Natalie:Website https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠

Facebook facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory

Instagram instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr

Linked In linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147

Tik Tok tiktok.com/@doc.natalie

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠ CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary

In this episode, Dr. Natalie explores the concept of 'The Great Unlearning,' a transformative journey that challenges the societal belief that doing everything right leads to a fulfilling life. She reflects on her personal experiences, particularly during midlife, where she realized that striving for perfection and external validation often leads to burnout and disillusionment. Dr. Natalie emphasizes the importance of self-worth and the need to reclaim it from within, rather than through external achievements or approval. Through poignant anecdotes, she illustrates how the pressure to conform to societal expectations can lead to a double life and emotional turmoil, ultimately advocating for a shift towards self-love and acceptance.

Dr. Natalie introduces the metaphor of the tugboat versus the lighthouse to illustrate the difference between exhausting oneself in the pursuit of perfection and standing firm in one's self-worth. She encourages listeners to reflect on their own lives, identifying where they may be sacrificing their well-being in the name of doing everything right. The episode serves as a powerful reminder that true fulfillment comes from within, and that midlife can be an opportunity for profound personal growth and self-discovery.

Keywords:

midlife, self-worth, personal growth, self-love, great unlearning, emotional well-being, tugboat lighthouse metaphor, reclaiming self-worth, Dr. Natalie

Takeaways:

• The version of you that you're most proud of may be blocking your actual life.

• Midlife can be an invitation to examine the mess of our lives and love it as it is.

• Reclaiming self-worth from the inside out is essential for true fulfillment.

Sound bites:

"What if I told you that the version of you that you're most proud of... is in the way of your actual life?"

"Today we're gonna talk about the great unlearning."

"You do not need to fix yourself. You just need to find yourself."

Chapters:

00:00 Introduction to The Great Unlearning

03:49 A Holiday Dinner Reflection

10:20 The Tugboat vs. The Lighthouse

18:10 The Power of Self-Love

23:39 Reflecting on Your Journey

JOIN the https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ Mailing List! Join my newsletter and receive my FREE video and workbook, “Freeing Yourself: A Guide for Letting Go of Other People's Opinions”

SIGN UP on the website at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/762561/109840834025752017/share⁠⁠⁠⁠ DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources): National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠

CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠Text HOME to 741741

Summary

In this conversation, Dr. Natalie explores the emotional challenges faced by women in midlife during the holiday season, particularly in relation to hormonal changes and the pressures of self-care. She discusses the impact of menopause on emotional well-being and the importance of self-compassion as women navigate these changes. The conversation emphasizes the need for community support and acceptance of one's evolving identity during this transitional phase of life.

Takeaways

• The holiday season can amplify feelings of irritability and self-focus in midlife women.
• Hormonal changes during menopause significantly affect emotional well-being.
• Women often prioritize others' needs over their own, leading to burnout.
• It's important to give oneself grace and acknowledge limitations during the holidays.
• Self-compassion is crucial for navigating midlife transitions.
• Emotional awareness shifts during menopause, leading to a more egocentric perspective.
• Accepting the current version of oneself is key to personal growth.
• Building self-awareness is essential for overcoming harmful habits.
• Community support can alleviate feelings of isolation during midlife.
• Midlife can be a time of significant personal growth and transformation.

Keywords: midlife, menopause, holiday stress, self-care, emotional well-being, hormonal changes, self-compassion, personal growth, women empowerment, mental health

Sound bites

"We want the routine to be the same."

"It's okay to give yourself grace."

"You really aren't alone in this."

Chapters

00:00 Navigating Holiday Emotions in Midlife

09:45 Understanding Brain Changes During Midlife

17:38 Embracing Self-Compassion and Growth in Midlife