The Challenger Podcast

In this episode, I explore whether long-distance relationships are a deal breaker, examining factors like attachment styles, communication, and compatibility across different Enneagram types. Discover practical insights to help you decide if the challenges and opportunities of long-distance love make sense for you.

If you're like me, you've been overwhelmed with all the choices available to you on dating apps and the mixed signals that you receive over text that are hard to understand.

A few years ago, I was in the same place so I sought out relationship experts and real life daters to help our audience understand how to navigate modern dating where texting, social media and dating apps are ways that people connect and communicate in the modern world.

Did you enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave me a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the Community, and help others find the self-awareness they're looking for.

Are you looking for support as you navigate modern dating with texting, social media and dating apps as a primary way that people connect and communicate?

Are you looking to heal your relationships while receiving and contributing to the lives of others from around the world?

Check out the challenge group and join me today for a free week trial of the like changing program.

Check out my Tiktok Page for a candid look into modern dating. @dave.glaser

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube

For more episodes visit me at DaveGlaser.com | Instagram @coachdaveglaser

Key topics

The impact of attachment styles on long-distance relationships How Enneagram types view and handle distance Communication strategies for maintaining connection Signs of healthy vs. unhealthy long-distance relationships The importance of shared goals and expectations How to assess compatibility for long-distance love The role of emotional and spiritual intimacy Challenges faced by anxious and avoidant attachment styles Practical tips for making long-distance relationships work Recognizing when distance reveals incompatibility

Chapters

00:00 Introduction: Are Long-Distance Relationships a Deal Breaker? 02:09 What Makes a Long-Distance Relationship Work? 05:01 The Importance of Communication and Planning 08:01 Attachment Styles and Their Influence on Distance 11:12 Enneagram Types and Their Perspectives on Distance 15:04 Signs of a Healthy Long-Distance Relationship 19:01 Common Challenges for Anxiously and Avoidantly Attached Partners 22:51 How to Build Trust and Manage Uncertainty 27:05 The Role of Compatibility and Shared Goals 30:50 The Upsides of Long-Distance Love 35:02 When Distance Reveals Incompatibility 39:09 Key Takeaways and Final Thoughts

The Dealbreakers Podcast takes a look at modern relationships through the lens of The Enneagram, attachment theory and self-awareness.

Today's episode discusses what to do if your date is friends with their ex! Your thoughts? Dealbreaker or nah?

If you're like me, you've been overwhelmed with all the choices available to you on dating apps and the mixed signals that you receive over text that are hard to understand.

A few years ago, I was in the same place so I sought out relationship experts and real life daters to help our audience understand how to navigate modern dating where texting, social media and dating apps are ways that people connect and communicate in the modern world.

Did you enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave me a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the Community, and help others find the self-awareness they're looking for.

Are you looking for support as you navigate modern dating with texting, social media and dating apps as a primary way that people connect and communicate?

Are you looking to heal your relationships while receiving and contributing to the lives of others from around the world?

Check out the challenge group and join me today for a free week trial of the like changing program.

Check out my Tiktok Page for a candid look into modern dating.

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube

For more episodes visit me at DaveGlaser.com | Instagram @coachdaveglaser

In this episode, Dave Glaser explores the common red flag of claiming all exes are crazy, and what it reveals about self-awareness, patterns, and accountability in dating. He offers insights into how to interpret this phrase and what it means for healthy relationships.

The Dealbreaker Podcast takes a look at modern relationships through the lens of The Enneagram, attachment theory and self-awareness.

If you're like me, you've been overwhelmed with all the choices available to you on dating apps and the mixed signals that you receive over text that are hard to understand.

A few years ago, I was in the same place so I sought out relationship experts and real life daters to help our audience understand how to navigate modern dating where texting, social media and dating apps are ways that people connect and communicate in the modern world.

Did you enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave me a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the Dave Glaser Community, and help others find the self-awareness they're looking for.

Are you looking for support as you navigate modern dating with texting, social media and dating apps as a primary way that people connect and communicate?

Are you looking to heal your relationships while receiving and contributing to the lives of others from around the world? Check out one-on-one coaching and join me today for a free week trial of the life changing program.

Check out my Tiktok Page for a candid look into modern dating.

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube For more episodes visit me at DaveGlaser.com | Instagram @coachdaveglaser

In this episode, I want to explore the nuanced role of alcohol has in dating, asking the question, "How many drinks is too many?" and how drinking behaviors reveal deeper compatibility issues. I emphasize the importance of self-awareness, boundaries, and understanding what your deal breakers truly are.

How many drinks is your dealbreaker? Have you ever seen someone lose control on a first date after too many drinks? Let's explore this question together and tie it in to each Enneagram type.

Your weekly challenge: Five dealbreakers vs. Five preferences. Write them down and email them to me at [email protected] or DM me on Instagram @datingdealbreakers

Key topics

The impact of alcohol on first dates and relationship signals How different Enneagram types respond to alcohol in dating scenarios The importance of self-awareness and boundaries in dating Red flags and deal breakers related to alcohol consumption How alcohol can mask or reveal emotional regulation issues

Takeaways

Alcohol use on a first date can reveal more than it conceals about a person's emotional regulation and compatibility. Self-awareness about your deal breakers is crucial for healthy dating and relationships. Different Enneagram types have distinct responses to alcohol that can influence dating dynamics. Understanding whether alcohol is a cover-up or a reveal can help you assess relationship potential. Your deal breakers should protect your well-being, not prevent genuine connection.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to the role of alcohol in dating 01:52 How many drinks are too many? Personal boundaries vary 03:59 Behavior changes after drinking and what they reveal 05:54 Alcohol as a mask or reveal of emotional regulation 07:52 Key relationship questions beyond alcohol 08:49 The impact of alcohol on the speed of emotional connection 10:13 Enneagram types and their responses to alcohol 15:04 Vulnerability, honesty, and alcohol in relationships 16:57 Reflecting on your deal breakers and boundaries

In this episode, Dave Glaser explores the importance of vulnerability for Enneagram 8s, challenging the misconception that strength equals emotional suppression. He shares personal insights and practical advice on how Eights can embrace vulnerability to foster deeper connections and healing.

The misconception that toughness equals strength for Enneagram 8s The importance of processing and healing emotional pain The difference between enduring and healing Practical steps for practicing vulnerability The role of boundaries and trust in emotional health The impact of unprocessed pain on relationships and well-being The concept of healthy vulnerability versus walls and armor The significance of forgiveness and letting go of past hurts

Takeaways

Vulnerability doesn't mean weakness, but strength in authenticity. Enduring pain without processing can hinder growth and healing. Setting boundaries is healthy; walls are isolating. Expressing hurt and needs is crucial for deep connection. Unprocessed pain can manifest as anger, control, or withdrawal. Healthy vulnerability involves trusting others with your true feelings. Forgiveness is about releasing the burden of past hurts. Asking yourself what you've never said can be a powerful step.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to vulnerability and Enneagram 8s 01:51 The misconception: toughness equals strength 03:55 The importance of processing emotional pain 05:49 Enduring vs. healing: the difference 08:11 How unprocessed pain affects relationships 10:05 Vulnerability as a strength, not weakness 11:58 Setting boundaries versus building walls 13:49 The role of trust and connection 16:10 Practical steps to practice vulnerability 18:03 The power of saying 'that hurt me' 19:53 Forgiveness and releasing past hurts 22:14 The challenge: asking yourself what you've never said 23:10 Conclusion: embracing vulnerability for true strength

In this episode, Dave Glaser explores what it means for an Enneagram type 8 to be out of alignment, how it manifests, and practical steps to regain balance. This is essential listening for anyone looking to understand the subtle signs of imbalance and how to live more authentically.

Signs of out-of-alignment in Enneagram Type 8 The difference between strength and control The importance of vulnerability and self-care Practical steps to regain alignment The role of honesty and slowing down

Out-of-alignment eights often feel resistance and battle everything. Control creates the illusion of safety but leads to exhaustion. Vulnerability is crucial for authentic connection and healing. Self-care often gets sacrificed for achievement. Slowing down and honest self-reflection are key to realignment.

Chapters

00:00 Recognizing the signs of being out of alignment 02:13 The strength of functioning versus the risk of burnout 04:28 The danger of fighting everything and control as an illusion 06:20 The importance of vulnerability and emotional access 07:16 Self-care neglect and its consequences 08:15 Steps to become a healthy, aligned eight 09:40 The power of honest self-reflection and letting go 11:03 The true meaning of strength: vulnerability and trust 12:01 The challenge of living authentically as an eight 12:56 Encouragement to embrace honesty and connection

In this episode, Dave Glaser shares insights from his experience as an Enneagram 8 leader, exploring how power dynamics influence coaching, leadership, and personal development. Discover how letting go of control can unlock potential in others and transform your leadership style.

Key topics

Enneagram 8 and leadership Power struggles and control Building trust and buy-in The importance of vulnerability in leadership Shifting from authority to partnership Lessons from coaching athletes Patience and humility in leadership Creating psychologically safe environments

Takeaways

Leadership is about creating buy-in, not control. Letting go of ego can lead to better performance. Empowerment comes from confidence, not authority. Athletes perform better when they feel safe and seen. Healthy Enneagram 8s redirect power to uplift others.

Chapters

00:27 Why I took a break and what this episode covers 00:50 The power dynamic in leadership and coaching 01:18 My experience returning to coaching after unemployment 01:46 Initial enthusiasm and resistance from athletes 02:13 Understanding the power struggle with high school athletes 02:38 How energy and intensity can create resistance 03:07 The importance of awareness and checking your ego 03:56 The shift from authority to partnership 05:46 The impact of trust and safety on performance 06:42 The misconception about healthy Enneagram 8s 07:10 The true strength of healthy Enneagram 8s 07:29 Challenger moment: leadership vs control 07:57 Applying these lessons in personal life and home projects 08:48 The remodeling project and lessons in patience 15:12 Patience and humility in leadership 16:07 Final thoughts: empowering others and leadership takeaway

In this episode, Dave Glaser shares his personal journey of transitioning back into a new role after a five-month employment gap. He explores the challenges and growth opportunities for Enneagram 8s, emphasizing the importance of awareness, connection, and intentional leadership during transitions.

Key topics

Enneagram 8 and sense of control Transition and adjustment in new roles The importance of awareness and connection in leadership Developing resilience and humility during change The edge of leadership: knowing when to challenge and when to listen

Takeaways

Unrefined Enneagram 8 energy can come off as intensity without connection. Transition requires adjustment, not domination. Leading with awareness pairs natural intensity with presence. Growth happens when you meet your edge with constraint, not just intensity. Leadership includes connection, not just direction.

Chapters

00:00 The Journey After the Struggle 02:41 Transitioning Back to Purpose 05:54 Leading with Awareness and Connection 08:41 Building vs. Proving: A Leadership Mindset

Who are you when control is gone? Who am I without my job? Control and being "armored up" are illusions.

In this episode, Dave Glaser shares a personal journey through job loss and its impact on an Enneagram 8. He explores themes of vulnerability, control, identity, and growth during challenging seasons, offering insights and practical advice for navigating uncertainty.

Key Themes

Impact of job loss on identity and control Pitfalls of overcompensation in Enneagram 8s

The importance of vulnerability and asking for help Growth through self-awareness and emotional depth

Takeaways

Vulnerability is the key to growth, not weakness. Control and armor are illusions that hinder progress. Separating identity from circumstances fosters resilience. Authentic strength includes awareness, flexibility, and connection.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Identity and Job Loss 04:37 The Pitfalls of Job Loss for Enneagram Eights 09:02 Vulnerability and the Journey of Self-Discovery 14:07 Recalibration and Moving Forward

In this episode, Dave Glaser explores how different Enneagram types run from their patterns through movement, control, and comfort, offering insights and practical challenges to foster self-awareness and growth.

Key topics

Enneagram types 7, 8, and 9 and their patterns of avoidance The role of movement, control, and comfort in self-sabotage Practical challenges to build consistency and awareness

Takeaways

Type 7s stay busy to avoid discomfort but need to stay committed longer. Type 8s use control to resist vulnerability but should focus on sustainable effort. Type 9s avoid conflict by disconnecting, and small actions can create momentum.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Patterns and Enneagram Types 01:18 Type Seven: The Enthusiast's Avoidance Patterns 03:25 Type Eight: The Challenger's Resistance to Vulnerability 06:10 Type Nine: The Peacemaker's Disengagement from Self 09:00 Conclusion: Awareness and Action Across All Types