In this episode of The Church We Dream Of, Christian therapist and podcaster Kia Gutierrez wrestles with the reality of grief, lament, and healing in the church. What’s the difference between grief and lament in the Bible? Why are Millennials leaving the church? What role does Gen Z play in reshaping the future of Christian community?

Kia shares insights from Scripture, her work as a marriage and family therapist, and a powerful dream that revealed how the church often confuses lament with performance. This episode explores why lament is a lost spiritual practice we desperately need to reclaim if we want to see authentic healing, unity, and revival.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• The difference between grief and lament—and why the church needs both.
  

• A Native American model of communal grieving that mirrors biblical lament.
  

• How performance culture shaped Millennial church leaders.
  

• Why Gen Z approaches the church platform differently, and how their strength is lament.
  

• The risks of performative grief and emotional burnout in ministry.
  

• A personal dream that revealed the church’s hidden struggle with grief.
  

• The role of lament in worship, healing, and spiritual formation.
  

• What Psalm 57 teaches us about lament turning into praise.
  

Key Quote:

“We are so focused on getting to the glory, we miss the fact that His glory is in the lament.”

Keywords & Themes:

• Christian grief and lament
  

• Millennials leaving the church
  

• Gen Z faith and leadership
  

• Healing church hurt and trauma
  

• Lament in the Bible (Psalm 57)
  

• Why the church needs lament
  

• Performance vs authenticity in church
  

Takeaway:
The church we dream of will never come by skipping pain. Healing begins when we acknowledge dysfunction, grieve together, and embrace lament as a sacred practice that leads us closer to God.

Resources Mentioned:

• Scripture Reading: Psalm 57 – David’s journey from mercy-seeking lament to steadfast praise.
  

Connect with Kia:

• Instagram: @healdeeplovewide

• Substack: https://kiagutierrez.substack.com/

• Website: www.kiagutierrez.com

The Church We Dream Of — Episode 1: Reimagining the Church Through Hurt, Grief, and Hope

In the premiere episode of The Church We Dream Of, host Kia Gutierrez—a licensed marriage and family therapist, wife, mom, and former missionary—invites listeners into an honest conversation about what it means to reimagine the church in the midst of pain and possibility.

What started as a simple dinner invitation opened a deeper truth: many long for authentic Christian community, yet hesitate to gather with the church. From personal stories of church trauma to insights from her therapy practice, Kia explores how unprocessed grief can freeze not just individuals, but entire congregations.

Through Scripture, reflection, and emotional honesty, Kia challenges listeners to look beyond cultural expectations and man-made traditions to rediscover God’s true design for His people. The church we dream of, she suggests, begins where performance ends—and restoration begins.

Themes:

• Why many hesitate to gather with the church

• How grief and trauma affect communities of faith

• The difference between performative healing and true restoration

• Why lament and emotional honesty matter

• What Isaiah 61 reveals about God’s heart for His people

Listen if you’re longing for:
Honest conversations about church hurt, spiritual renewal, and rediscovering Jesus’ vision for community.

Follow Kia:
Instagram → @healdeeplovewide
Substack → kiagutierrez.substack.com
Website → www.kiagutierrez.com