The ClearOut

In this episode, Dara tries to get his head around the riots that took place in Dublin recently after a violent knife attack on young children outside their school in the middle of the day. The subsequent outpouring of shock and anger escalated into a night of destruction, rioting and looting in the city centre, fuelled by anti-immigrant rhetoric.

Dara wonders about the bad actors involved in inciting the riot, the larger connection to the rise of populism and ultra-nationalism that seems to be prospering the world over, and the pre-existing conditions that lead to such a powder keg volatility amongst those who wreaked such wanton havoc.

An assessment of the situation by online comic personality and musician, Garron Noone, was so impressive that Dara features part of it here. Clear-eyed, passionate and fair, Garron's thoughtfulness about what happened is a great contribution to a very complex subject.

Finally, Dara looks at the socio-psychological implications of the rioters' actions. Where does that desire to lash out come from? What is the genesis of that violence and anger? Is it ultimately an indictment of generational and systemic neglect by Ireland's national institutions? Is it connected to a denial of dignity and pride? And is it possible to express love for swathes of angry men who tore apart the streets of Ireland's capital?

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In this episode Dara admits he didn't realise it was International Men's Day, and a tweet suggesting what men should be reflecting on for the big day triggered something defensive in him.

Before examining that reaction, Dara talks about a recent night in with his cousin and their respective daughters that didn't go quite as he anticipated, but was arguably the better for it.

In the context of sexual politics and the male perspective, Dara revisits and very much enjoys the 1971 Mike Nichols film Carnal Knowledge, which he argues has aged very well, conveying as it does a very believable depiction of how straight men relate to and talk about their objects of desire.

The second half of the episode is an examination of the idea of atonement, which is Dara's response to the aforementioned tweet. He questions the value of atonement and wonders if anybody should be entitled to expect that of anybody else. Contrition, guilt, punishment and forgiveness are connected concepts that are also considered. But the real question is - what do we owe anybody?

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In this episode, Dara reflects on some Jewish insights into the Israel-Palestine conflict which he found both helpful and inspiring. He posits that in the act of dehumanising Palestinians, Israel ends up dehumanising itself, which is its own kind of tragedy.

Dara considers the interpretations of the phrase 'our shared humanity'. He argues that it could be taken as good or bad, but explains how it informs his own essentially positive outlook. He connects it to the idea of where we allow our energy to be directed or absorbed, and cautions that we need to be very mindful of the places our energy can dwell.

Having just watched the new Robbie Williams documentary, Dara draws comparisons between it and another recent TV appraisal of a 90s icon - David Beckham. He recalls living and studying in England in the mid-90s and how palpable the feelgood factor of the zeitgeist was. He identifies a connection between Robbie Williams and Israel that speaks to an originating wound that neither have found a way to successfully transcend, leaving both the pop star and the country in comparable states of denial.

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In this episode Dara reveals that he is unaccustomed to the comfort of pajamas. This fact is relevant to a very recent late-night incident that he shares. That same incident concluded with an inherent contradiction relating to the presence of both love and rejection.

In acknowledging that tension, Dara begins to talk about romance as a form of idealism. He argues that the conscious demonstration of love, regardless of the recipient, is an act of romance that is tethered to an idealised concept of love.

Romance has arguably fallen out of fashion at the movies, but Dara just watched two very accomplished romantic films and found himself moved in very different ways by each. The Tom Cruise vehicle Jerry Maguire (1996) and Celine Song's exquisite Past Lives (2023) may not seem to have much in common, but they are hugely successful love stories on their own terms.

And what happens when love is not part of one's foundational experience? Ask Sylvester Stallone, who leaves no doubt as to where his deepest wound originated.

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In this cultural episode, Dara is in awe of two recent Shakespearean recitations he caught on small screens, delivered fifty years apart in almost identical settings by two masters of the form. He makes an effort of his own and is embarrassed by the resulting evidence of his lesser skill.

Before that, he briefly shares last thoughts on the final of the Rugby World Cup, which was won by a dogged South Africa last weekend. He expresses particular admiration for the eloquent Springbok captain, Siya Kolisi, who consistently speaks of the impact and symbolism back home of the success of his team.

Dara spends the second half of the podcast reviewing and reacting to Martin Scorsese's latest film, Killers of the Flower Moon. He left the cinema feeling sick, depressed and exhilarated at what he had just seen. A film of sneaking and insidious power, Dara isn't sure he has ever seen such a successful depiction of systematic and dehumanising white racism.

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In this episode, Dara is exercised by the things we don't say. Why is it so difficult to express how we really feel to those we have known longest? Why do we communicate so tangentially and clumsily? What intricate layering process happens to put truth so far out of easy reach?

Dara presents a theory he calls relational dislocation, in which we can find ourselves occupying very different areas of a landscape to someone we think we know intimately. He likens it to moving to a new part of an ecosystem, leaving others behind. While arguing that it is connected to self-preservation and a certain amount of complacency, he is concerned that it is also where hurt, resentment and judgement thrive.

Truth gets buried so deep that real work is required to excavate it. Only then can we communicate something from our base state that can't be spun into a half-truth or an interpretation of truth. Revisiting a recent theme, Dara wonders if men are particularly bad at this.

Looking to the outbreak of war in the Middle East, Dara tries to get a sense of Jewish perspectives on the conflict. He also looks at how criticism of Israel's extreme response is being met with highly reactive condemnation, and in some cases, cancellation.

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In this pendulum swing of an episode, Dara is dancing between joy and pain. It is a journey that takes him from Ireland's expulsion from the Rugby World Cup last week to the birth of his daughter 10 years ago.

Raking over the rugby loss, Dara tries to understand exactly why it hurts so much. He knows it has something to do with a peculiar mixture of national pride and insecurity. He also discusses the sense of injustice connected to a team that felt so 'right', so destined to succeed. All the good vibes and positive energy, aligned with unprecedented excellence on the field of play, raised expectations and rendered the defeat almost beyond belief. It has been a dizzying height from which to descend.

Before moving on to other matters, Dara reviews a couple of recently-watched movies with interesting female protagonists at the heart of the action. Fair Play, written and directed by Chloe Domont, is an edgy drama that looks at how improved status and power in the world of finance can have a divisive impact on dynamics at home, especially when it is a woman who is suddenly a rising star. Last Night In Soho is Edgar Wright's latest film and it is a psycho-sexual thriller that transports a young woman back to the swinging sixties in London where all is not as cool and groovy as it first appears.

The last part of the episode is dedicated to Dara's daughter, who has just turned 10. He recalls his experience of becoming a father and reads a piece he wrote a few weeks after that moment in which he lays out his hopes for his baby's future life. It is an undiluted expression of love and relief. Ten years on, he is still feeling grateful.

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In this episode Dara looks at dynamics of giving and receiving in relationships. He argues that having a true exchange with someone is impossible unless that dynamic is present and healthy.

Talking about an upcoming project, Dara explains why he has called it The Receptive Mind and concedes he could try to access more of that mindfulness in his parenting.

Do men really not talk, or is that just a stereotype that they blithely accept? After a recent conversation with a friend about his troubled son, Dara thinks about what he would say to the young man in question. He recalls how helpful his own male friends were when he was a teenager.

Also featured this week are phony wellness aesthetics, toxic positivity, empty buzzwords, and the energy-sapping effects of device vortices.

The episode concludes with a poem about the shapes we form to deal with life.

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In this episode Dara is agitated by an interview with a US politician that he has just listened to. He is frustrated by the public representative's combativeness and disingenuous line of argument. He wonders why politicians are so incapable of being honest.

Dara looks at Lawrence Kasdan's 1983 film The Big Chill, considered by some to be a key generational text, in a context of racial politics and cultural representation. As fond as he is of the star-studded 80s fest, he concludes it may be the whitest movie ever made. Continuing the theme, 1992's Into The West is briefly discussed as a movie that served its subject - Irish Travellers - very well.

Responding to a recent social media post showing screenshots of news headlines about abusive or criminal men, Dara proposes a complementary idea that would showcase the normal everyday achievements of men. He calls it Real Men Headlines and tries out a couple of examples to see what it sounds like.

Higher Learning episode featuring interview with Larry Elder: https://www.theringer.com/2023/9/26/23890614/white-supremacy-black-fatherhood-with-larry-elder

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In this episode Dara is looking into the void and trying not to feel frightened. Thinking about the construction of identity and personality, he is curious about how comfortable or not we are with what lies beneath. He asks if you can handle being left alone with yourself.

He argues for coming to peace with oneself and entering into a state of acceptance of what he calls the unnamed being that may lurk under the surface. He acknowledges that he is not speaking from a position of blissed-out serenity and discusses his strategic template for negotiating his lifelong skirmishes with depression.

Dara posits that titles, careers and professions are things that we do, but even if vocational, are not necessarily an indication of who we are. He explains why someone's job is often the thing he finds least interesting about them. In the most extreme cases he suspects that the removal of role or occupation results in the erasure of self. So what can be done to fill that void?

He lays out the value of the subjective perspective as a means of personal assertion and validated separation from the white noise of 21st century existence, but is quick to add that it is an individualistic strategy that is not an individualistic philosophy. Ultimately, if the battle within can be won, the battles without will be that much less daunting!

Website: https://theclearout.com/

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YouTube: The ClearOut Podcast

Email: [email protected]

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