The Complete Guide to Everything

This week, we have a brand new installment in our TCGTE Myths and Legends series. We talk about the infamous goat sucker, the chupacabra and uncover some truly alarming facts. Also, Tim has some stories about riding the bus and we solve problems from a lady looking for love and a child politician.

Bagels, bagels, bagels. This week we’re talking about the ol’ bready treat known as bagels. Toasted, untested, cream cheese, butter, New York-style, Montreal-style, we don’t shy away from any bagel-related topic. Also this week Tim discusses his trip to the magical Build Your Own Burger McDonalds that Tom visited a few weeks ago as well as his Valentine’s Day run-in with Rainbow Bagels.

Also this week we celebrate the return of the Mundane Bucket List and we solve a listener problem involving a couple’s escalating prank war.

Ever wonder what the tiny, child-versions of Tim & Tom wanted to be when they grew up? What were our hopes and our dreams? The answers may shock you.

Also, Burger King announces it'll serve hot dogs, Tom has a question about the Super Bowl and we solve a problem about old love letters.

This week Tim and Tom are talking Groceries, something that neither of them thought to shop for until very recently. We're talking fruits, we're talking vegetables, are we talking meats? You're damn right we're talking meats. No stone is left unturned.

Also this week we solve a listener's problem concerning how to make an acquaintance into a friend without being a real weirdo about it.

Questions about branding? You've come to the right place. This week we're talking about rebranding efforts: Radio Shack, Pizza Hut, Dr. Pepper and a bunch of other brands have switched things up in a misguided attempt to appeal to young folks, and all of them paid a terrible price for doing so. Can we rebrand The Complete Guide to Everything to appeal to a new, hip audience? But first, Tom takes a magical trip to a new McDonalds with a magical touch screen.

Also, we solve a problem from a listener with a co-worker who is a boring drunk.

There's a blizzard a-comin'! As we prepare for the biggest snow storm to hit NYC in decades, we're talking all things snow: childhood memories, panicked rushes on the supermarkets for bread and milk, and building disappointing snowmen. We also come up with a foolproof plan to avoid snowstorms altogether in the future. And in a new installment of Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems, we help out a chef who can't seem to keep her subordinates out of jail.

This week we’re talkin’ glasses. It turns out they’re not just for nerds anymore because now Tom needs them too. Mostly this is just an episode where Tom complains, first about the Post Office, then about the process of getting an eye exam and buying glasses. Also, Tim answers a lot of Tom’s burning questions about the ins and outs of glasses ownership. Then at the very end we talk about how everyone admirable has been dying lately and it’s really sad.

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This week we're hittin' the tanks! We took a field trip to a new age-y place to get into sensory deprivation tanks. Was it fun? Did Tim lose his mind forever? Did Tom travel through the cosmos and discover the meaning of life? Listen and find out what we learned by lying down naked in some salt water in the dark for an hour.

Our old buddy and acclaimed music guy Dan Deacon stops by to ring in 2016 and talk about ska music, Santa Claus and a bunch of weird stuff with us. We also solve a couple listener problems in a special edition of Tim & Tom & Dan Solve Your Problems.

For the last episode of 2015, we talk about chocolate, the only food that Tom eats without complaining. We discuss the Mast Brothers controversy in detail and consistently mispronounce the word cacao. Also, Tim has a heartwarming holiday encounter in a pizza place.