The Couples Expert

What is a map? It helps us understand where you are. It helps you find your way if you are lost. It also helps you know where you are (or should be) headed.

It can be confusing when each partner has a yearning to feel that they are valuable, and connected to the other, but still don’t. Many times people change their physical appearance in hopes of getting the love and attention they want from their partner.

Of course, this is a sad place for your relationship, because it means that love is based on an outward condition, and may be over when the outward appearance changes.

This is why a map is important. You can create a clear plan to have a connection far deeper than anything outward. Having a partner in your life that you are connected to actually changes your life and the science bears it out. You live longer, and have a happier life when you are in a loving relationship. Your entire existence can feel joyful and wonderful, and your outlook on life is more positive, so you are better in every aspect of your life.

1. Establish a relationship that is safe and secure, and each of you view the challenges in the same light. 
2. Establish a relationship where you can share your negative assumptions, interpretations and feelings because you can’t read each others mind. Most importantly, make sure you believe what your partner tells you!

How do you follow this map? Old wounds may surface, and you may get off track. This is where a counselor with the same map can help you stay on track.

Getting caught up in the blame game isn’t helpful. However, when you find your relationship in a vulnerable spot and yet still feel a connection to your partner, it is truly magical.

When you offer your partner a better life and support them unconditionally, then you can experience a connection that is pure bliss!

You can read the full show notes and access all the links and resources at www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com

Couples who want to stay connected don't have to sweat the small stuff. There are so many areas of your relationship to focus on, so letting little things "get to you" or arguing over the small things can rob you of the opportunity to stay connected to your partner on a deeper level. Keep that in mind as you go through this week, and enjoy the reward of a deeper connection with your partner!

Today’s episode is about making life matter and restoring passion to your relationship. Bruce Van Horn is a marathon runner writer, speaker, a teacher, and a life coach. He is the host of the podcast Life is a Marathon. His mission is to reach, teach, and empower people to live life with the fullest expression of who they were created to be. In his books, podcast, blogs, retreats, and speaking engagements, he uses words to positively change the world. He writes and talks about living to our fullest potential by telling ourselves stories that empower us and also inspire others. 

By re-storying (Bruce’s word-play about restoring passion, purpose, and vision, Bruce helps businesses and individuals rid themselves of limiting beliefs, counter-productive behaviors, and negative self-assessments and replace those with a  new mindset to unleash their true power.  

Bruce emphasizes the importance of instilling gratitude as the foundation of a positive and happy outlook in life and in relationships. By developing and building a sense of gratitude in every situation, event, circumstance, we are able to see the positive side of our life.   

Daily nuggets of relationship advice in just 3 minutes. Join Stuart today as he discusses the curveballs that life throws at us. We all have them!

We’re in the dog days of summer, and it has been extremely hot here in Scottsdale. Sure, folks say “It’s not bad because it’s a dry heat”, but let me assure you that during monsoon season, it is both hot and humid. So the 110 degrees feels every bit of 110. We consider ourselves survivors to just “make it” in this kind of heat. This sort of environment can add frustration to an already tense marriage. So, that’s why we are talking with Jo Muirhead and John Drury. They are a married couple, whose work includes helping you achieve a balance in your marriage through work/life integration.

Both of my guests are well respected in their own niche, and they come together to share with us what it’s really like to have to live what they teach.  John is a mentor, author, speaker and he’s married to Jo. She’s a rehab counselor out of Sydney, Australia. She helps people return to work after an injury or other challenges that they’ve had. They now have a program for high achieving executives, to help them focus on the work/life balance that seems to be elusive.

Today Jo and John are here to put all the pieces together to help us achieve work/life balance!

In the 66th episode of The Couples Expert Podcast, A Groundhog Day Marriage, Stuart talks about some of the ways in which couples find themselves trapped in their own time warps of negative cycles as Bill Murray was in the movie "Groundhog Day", a story about a man who finds himself trapped in a bizarre time warp which forces him to relive the same day over and over again, making the same mistakes over and over again. Do you find yourself making the same mistakes with your partner day after day, caught in a cycle of negative relationship patterns? Many of us do, and sometimes it is extremely difficult to extricate ourselves from these repetitive actions and words, like trying to get off some evil merry-go-round that just won’t stop! In this podcast Stuart offers some practical solutions on how to get out of negative cycles. 

The accepted medical definition of infertility is the inability for a couple to conceive or carry a pregnancy to term after a year of frequent, unprotected sex. In episode 65 of The Couples Expert, Stuart speaks with Erika Labuzan-Lopez about the complicated emotions a couple experiences when one or both partners is infertile.

In the 64th episode of The Couples Expert we talk about how a therapy dog can be the best thing that happens to your relationship. Dogs are known as "man's best friend", well they an also be a best friend to your relationship too.

In the 63rd episode of The Couples Expert Podcast,Listen to Pooh and Love Your Partner with Your Heart, the topic is sexuality and intimacy. What it fundamentally comes down to is finding intimacy not through our parts, but through our hearts. Join Stuart and Jim as they discuss the nature of intimacy, the true meaning of eroticism, and what it means to be passionate.

In the 62nd episode of The Couples Expert Podcast: Couples Coping with Cancer, Stuart Fensterheim speaks with Wander Garnder about one of the most devastating events that can occur in a relationship, receiving a diagnosis of cancer. For both patient and partner, the fears and worries of what is to come can be overwhelming.