In an article written for NBCNews.com, Sarah DiGiulio provides nine tips for talking to people, you disagree with.

Here's a link to the full article:  https://www.nbcnews.com/better/lifestyle/9-tips-talking-people-you-disagree-ncna1059326

We as a nation and world need to heal. The first step to healing is forgiveness. Forgiveness is a conscious decision to release negative feelings and emotions toward someone who has harmed you.  They may not desire to be forgiven, yet in order to heal, we must forgive.

In my daily prayer, I was reminded of our situation when I came across, “Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” The Journal of Positive Psychology conducted a survey that revealed forgiving ourselves decreases depression, reduces anxiety, and strengthens your immune system.

When you hold on to pain and carry grudges, it’s like toxins being released into your body. In order to heal and eliminate these toxins, you must forgive.

NFL Player, Drew Brees, Quarterback of the New Orleans Saints, shared how kneeling during the National Anthem is disrespectful to the flag. It was his opinion, he is not a racist, and had shown a tremendous amount of love and generosity to the people of New Orleans – especially after Katrina. The outcry came from his teammates and other high-profile athletes. Did Drew Brees fight them? No. He asked for forgiveness.

By asking for forgiveness anyone you release your guilt and pain. Your healing can begin.

I have seen more apologies on social media recently for years of abuse to those with color.  The thing is I know the people who are apologizing. They personally have nothing to apologize for because they treat all people equally. Some of you may be listening, shaking your head in disappointment, because “Troy doesn’t get it. He’s privileged.” That accusation is made with so much ignorance it doesn’t require me to defend. I’m using the literal definition of the word ignorance and not using it in a negative way. Ignorance is the lack of knowledge or information.

We as individuals are responsible for our own actions. Apologizing for something we aren’t responsible for doing, I think is the wrong action to take. The question is, as an American, am I responsible for our wicked history of slavery. No. In fact, if I was there in person, watching George Floyd suffering under the knee of an officer, I would have walked up to him and asked him to stop. If he didn’t, I would have pressed further and probably have been arrested. When change comes from the top or law makers it’s short lived. Change needs to come from each individual showing love and acceptance for the future.

The number one most effective element of an apology is accepting responsibility. In Miami, as protestors approached police, the police kneeled and asked for forgiveness. This was a powerful moment. They were accepting responsibility and had every right to accept responsibility with the amount of police violence we’ve all seen.

After the effects of what has happened with a white police officer killing an unarmed black man, there is again the conversation of America being a racist country. If you look up the definition of racist, it reads a person who shows or feels discrimination or prejudice against people of other races or who believes that a particular race is superior to another.

I had a conversation with someone last week who called me privileged and disillusioned because I said, “I don’t look for racism; therefore, I don’t see it.” Now, I shouldn’t have said that because even if I’m not looking for it, I can see it. It’s not that I don’t believe racism exists; it’s that I don’t think it’s the root of the problem. Hate is the root of the problem.

The opposite of hate is love. Loving someone with hate is hard. Love is a sacrifice, and if you show love, someone with hatred is going to take advantage of you.  They may get that promotion over you, and it’s not fair. I believe those with hate in their heart can change. The change comes witnessing intentional acts of love. I’m not suggesting you sit there as someone beats on you. Love isn’t weak. What I’m suggesting is before it rises to violence, be intentional with showing love through our actions, through our words, through our understanding.

As an individual, don’t go to your city with a megaphone preaching love. There is a mob mentality, and your safety is priority number one. What you can do as an individual is show love through sacrifice, regardless of color. Sacrifice your place in line. Sacrifice your right for road rage. Sacrifice your lousy day by sharing your smile with others. Sacrifice your right to dress and look a certain way to put others at ease, even though it’s their problem.

On Friday after watching buildings burn in Minneapolis, I posted my opinion on my personal Facebook page. That’s when it was apparent to me: there is a mob mentality on Facebook.  Last week reinforced my belief of whatever people want to believe, they are going to believe. If you don’t agree with them, you are dead to them.  Not dead in a literal sense, just a lower standard.  

Last week I was called delusional, privileged, out of touch, insensitive, and a poor representation of Jesus Christ. Wow.  It hurt.  I understand my spitt'n fire style of provoking thought is going to upset people.  I spoke to some of them offline and we never got to what I believe is the root of the issue: HATE.

This entire week on the micro-podcast, I’m going to address the discord of people in our country - we are not the United States of America, not even close.  And it isn’t 50% conservative, 50% liberal, we are divided amongst our family, our closest friends, and our neighbors.  The root of this isn’t racism, it isn’t our past as a Country, it isn’t social media, it’s hate.

I'm on vacation this week so I'm publishing a replay of the Two Minute Whiteboard series, The Mindset Spectrum.

I'm on vacation this week so I'm publishing a replay of the Two Minute Whiteboard series, The Mindset Spectrum.

I'm on vacation this week so I'm publishing a replay of the Two Minute Whiteboard series, The Mindset Spectrum.

I'm on vacation this week so I'm publishing a replay of the Two Minute Whiteboard series, The Mindset Spectrum.