Draco Malfoy’s Eighth Year is a catastrophe in slow motion. On probation and hated by half the castle, he tries a “harmless” repurposing of Harmonia Nectere Passus—linking beds via Vanishing Cabinet magic—to facilitate a discreet fling. Instead, the spell keeps delivering a very unimpressed Hermione Granger into his dorm. Between Divination disasters, owl-delivered doomsday prophecies from Narcissa, a vengeful Durmstrang roommate, cursed curios, and Slytherin schemes, Draco fights his worst instincts while nightly chaos with Hermione upends his careful control. A witty, chaotic, and heartfelt slow-burn full of wandlore, ill-advised plans, and two brilliant rivals who can’t stop colliding.

Rating: Mature
Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Category: F/M
Fandom: Harry Potter – J. K. Rowling
Relationship: Hermione Granger / Draco Malfoy
Characters: Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger, Romilda Vane, Thorfinn Rowle’s Son, Sybill Trelawney, Isobel MacDougal, Justin Finch-Fletchley, Harry Potter, Ginny Weasley, Theodore Nott, Blaise Zabini, Garrick Ollivander, Crookshanks, Minerva McGonagall, Luna Lovegood, Cormac McLaggen, Poppy Pomfrey, Astoria Greengrass, Daphne Greengrass, Horace Slughorn

Tags: Hogwarts Eighth Year; Divination; Slytherin Dungeons; Vanishing Cabinets; Wandlore; Humor; Polyjuice Potion; Dual POV (Draco & Hermione); Poorly Executed Seduction Techniques; Xylomancy; Astrology; Scrying Mirrors; Numerology; Tarot; Magical Research; Magical Pythons; Fire-Breathing Chickens; Post-It Notes of Doom; Cursed Objects; Strange Tea Parties; Bad Acronyms; Plants with Personalities; Snakes with Glasses; Slow Burn; Sexual Content; Slug Club

Published: 2021-03-06 Completed: 2022-04-03
Words: 201,107 Chapters: 69/69

Stats: Comments 4,033 · Kudos 8,444 · Bookmarks 4,212 · Hits 480,209

Notes: Translations available (Polski; Russian). Opening chapter includes a “pushy” content warning.