Can jealousy become erotic—and can we have both security and novelty in our relationships?

I'm joined by Ally Iseman from Passport to Pleasure, a certified relationship coach, non-monogamy educator, pleasure advocate and speaker whose work explores how we can create more intentional relationships and more expansive erotic lives.

We explore:

• Erotic jealousy and what happens when jealousy itself becomes part of desire.
• Consensual non-monogamy and how to know whether you're ready to explore it.
• How to talk to a monogamous partner about opening a relationship.
• The tension between security and erotic novelty.
• The mistakes people commonly make when opening relationships.
• Symbiosexuality—the emerging concept of attraction to the energy and dynamic between people in an existing relationship.
• Why designing relationships consciously may require us to question the scripts we've inherited about love.

Research article:  The fewer the merrier?: Assessing stigma surrounding consensually non-monogamous romantic relationships.

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

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Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if some BDSM experiences aren't simply erotic—but sacred?

In this episode I explore with scholar Melissa M. Wilcox about the fascinating intersection of BDSM, spirituality, religion, ritual and sexuality.

We explore:

• Ritual, surrender and meaning within BDSM.
• The historical relationship between religion, pain and self-flagellation.
• What makes an experience feel sacred.
• Melissa's research process for Devotions.
• Feminist Wicca, LGBTQ+ Christianity and Melissa's academic journey.
• Why human beings create rituals in the first place.

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if submission wasn't about weakness...but about finally feeling safe enough to be vulnerable?

In this episode I sit down with The Queensman—a passionate submissive, service sub, tantra practitioner, latex fetishist, and the first Good Boy to appear on the podcast.

We explore:

• What it means to identify as a Good Boy.
• Mommy Domme/little dynamics and unconditional love.
• Why service submission isn't about being a pushover.
• Hidden desires, shame, and self-acceptance.
• How tantra transformed his BDSM journey.
• Latex, caning, and his favourite kinks.
• Advice for anyone afraid to explore their desires.

Research article: Sexual diversity in the United States: Results from a nationally representative probability sample of adult women and men.

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if Shibari wasn't simply about rope—but about learning a new way to communicate?

In this episode I chat with internationally recognised Shibari artist Marie Sauvage to explore the psychology of presence, embodiment, ritual, and the artistic language of Japanese rope bondage.

We explore:

• How Shibari became Marie's artistic language.
• Why rope is about communication, not just restraint.
• Presence, embodiment, and interoceptive awareness.
• The role of trust in Japanese rope bondage.
• Why Marie sees performances as rituals rather than demonstrations.
• A feminine perspective on contemporary Shibari.

Research article: Interoceptive Awareness Skills for Emotion Regulation: Theory and Approach of Mindful Awareness in Body-Oriented Therapy (MABT).

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Can men experience multiple orgasms - and if so, why aren't more people talking about it?

In this episode I speak with men's sexuality coach Jim Benson to explore the psychology of masculine desire, tantra, erotic confidence, and the surprising science behind the multi-orgasmic man.

We explore:

• What it means to become a multi-orgasmic man.
• The difference between orgasm and ejaculation.
• How tantra transforms male sexuality.
• Overcoming sexual shame and performance anxiety.
• Awakening the "sexual animal within".
• Why presence creates better sex.

Research article: Male multiple orgasms: a descriptive study.

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What happens when healing from trauma changes the way you understand your desires?

In this episode I chat with with Big_Bear_Hug to explore the psychology of trauma, boundaries, erotic identity, and the lifelong process of becoming ourselves.

We explore:

• The relationship between trauma and desire.
• Learning healthy boundaries inside and outside kink.
• Navigating triggers within BDSM spaces.
• Finding a kink-aware therapist.
• Becoming a "Desire Fulfilment Entity".
• Belonging beyond labels.

Research article: Questioning Gender and Sexual Identity in the Context of Self-Concept Clarity, Sense of Coherence and Value System.

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Why is finding the right help for a sexual concern still so difficult?

In this episode I’m joined by Michael Corner, founder of Orgasmic Wellness, to explore the fragmented systems surrounding sexual health—and what it might take to connect people with better care.

We explore:

• What sexual wellness actually includes.
• Why finding the right sex therapist or practitioner is difficult.
• The barriers preventing people from seeking sexual-health support.
• What makes Orgasmic Wellness different from searching Google.
• The future of integrated sexual health and wellbeing.

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How do you build the world's largest BDSM community?

In this episode I chat down with John Baku, the founder of FetLife, to explore the psychology behind one of the most influential platforms in modern kink.

We explore:

• How FetLife was created.
• The psychology of building online communities.
• Why belonging is so important for kinky people.
• The future of FetLife and BDSM education.
• Community safety, moderation, and transparency.
• Advice for people joining FetLife for the first time.

Research article: The Benefits of Facebook “Friends:” Social Capital and College Students’ Use of Online Social Network Sites.

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if your erotic struggles aren't really about sex but about safety, connection, and your nervous system?

In this episode I chat with Amber Ella-Vatrix—conscious kink educator, tantra practitioner, neuroscience-informed facilitator, and creator of The Erotic Edge.

We explore:

• Conscious kink.
• Tantra and embodied sexuality.
• Heart-based dominance.
• Erotic transformation.
• The sacred prostitute tradition.
• Trauma, retraumatisation, and safety.

Research article: Polyvagal Theory: A Science of Safety.

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Can some women experience super orgasms?

In this episode I chat with down with Mae —educator, former professor, and creator whose work has placed her at the centre of thousands of deeply personal conversations about sexuality, fantasy, insecurity, and pleasure.

We explore:

• Super orgasms and Expanded Sexual Response (ESR).
• Male sexuality and vulnerability.
• Consent, communication and respect.
• Kink and human connection.
• Sexual confidence.
• Why pleasure matters more than performance.

Research article: Five Cases with Expanded Sexual Response (ESR).

Supporters of The Erotic Realm:

• Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here.
• Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here.
• ProDx Health at home STI testing here.

Innovative Sex Tech:

• Lioness here.
• Kiiroo here.
• Luxus here.
• Lovense here.

Science-backed libido support:

• Flow supplement here.
• Desire supplement here.

Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠

The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.