The Frustration Factor

Do you aspire to be the perfect employee? Perhaps you want to find and hire the perfect employee. Either way, this guide to recognizing the perfect employee is one you may find to be essential to your success. Please consider the guide carefully. As you will see, the perfect employee is rare. The best most of us can do is to come close. Even so, it’s well-worth the effort.

• The perfect employee avoids personal actions or involvements that may associate negatively with the organization.

If you are in the imperfect employee majority and plan to stay there, you likely believe that what you do on your own time is none of your employers’ business. The larger the organization is and the less important your job and you are within the organization, the more likely it is that your belief will work out okay for you. This is especially true if you stay out of trouble with the police and have no plan to get a higher position or more responsibility in the organization.

On the other hand, there are a few factors that can quickly make your personal life very relevant for your current and future employment. Two are central. First, the more sensitive to and dependent on public support or perception the organization is, the more your personal life matters and the more your behavior and personal choices become associated with the organization. Second, the higher or more important you and your position are in the organization or the higher your aspirations, the more your personal life matters.

The conclusion is easy. When employers are looking for the perfect employee or if you aspire to be the perfect employee, reputation, conduct and deportment do make a difference. Personal history, current and past reputation, the opinions of people who know you well and your current life circumstances matter a lot. They matter to perspective employers and equally matter to those who aspire to be the perfect employee.

• Shows up every day.

For most of us, this probably seems like one of those no brainers. For virtually all employers, though, it is far from a no brainer. I don’t know what the percent is, but experience tells me that it is about half and half. About half of employees show up every day unless they are truly ill or have a real emergency that prevents their being at work. The other half includes people who vary from those who make up an occasional excuse not to show up to those who use every excuse or justification they can conjure up. The worst of this group are those employees who don’t come to work because they just don’t feel like coming today.

Again, the conclusion is easy. Employers looking for the perfect employee stick with the group who responsibly come to work every day, in the absence of a legitimate reason not to be there. If you aspire to be the perfect employee, show up when you are expected, every time, on time, with none but legitimate reasons for being absent or late, no exceptions, no excuses. That is a major part of what employers mean when they talk about dependable employees.

• Is present all day.

This is obvious to most employees and employers but is a real brain twister for employees who just don’t get it. I think this is because there are only a few ways to be present and so many ways to be at work but not actually present.

Being present means that the employee is thinking about work and work-related activities, is paying attention to their work and to what is going on at work and is fully engaged with their work activities and responsibilities.

Not being present while being at work means thinking, doing and attending to anything other than work activities and responsibilities. The employee may be day dreaming, surfing the net, doing personal things on his or her cell phone, gossiping or socializing with other employees, taking care of personal business,

We likely think we value equality in some relationships and not in others. When it comes to love and power, though, the likelihood of equality is quite slim. This holds between the people in the relationship and between love and power themselves. Love, power and relationships are dynamic variables and not constants and mix and blend, depending…. Please join me as I explore that mixing and blending between parents and children, men and women, employers and employees, and whenever two or more people live and relate together.

I stopped by the Audio Tidbits Podcast Headquarters a while back and got what was for me a surprising present. I will not go with a spoiler here. You will need to listen to share in the surprising present.

How much can you get done when the best they can do is to assure you that “Your call is very important to us?” Some days, not much. The good news is that doing nothing and getting nothing done may be a better outcome than you might have thought. The Audio Tidbits Podcast team has some thoughts on that for you, along with their usual this and that about this and that. Please listen. I think you will find what they have to say at least worth a smile.

We are told that we should accept the things we can’t change, but should we really? The truth of the matter is that I don’t think that I know what that means. Whether I do or don’t, I do know that it likely doesn’t matter whether I accept what I can’t change or not. Things and people are pretty much as they are and there isn’t much we are going to do about that; and trying to move that rock is one big waste of our time and energy.

If you think I should change, I might change but…. Sure, there is always a but. It could happen but most likely not any time soon or in the way you want me to change. If you don’t opt to just give up on me, your time and energy will be best invested in helping me succeed in being who I want me to be. Please press play and consider how that might work.

I have remixed an earlier episode of Audio Tidbits Podcast. It’s a group of tips and suggestions for making a difference for people who make a difference for you. I think you will likely enjoy all of the tips and may find one or two that particularly resonate for you. Please listen and pick out the little tips that work best for you.

It started with a temper tantrum. It didn’t amount to much. He was only 3 and the truth of the matter is that it was kind of cute. Then he was 15 and it was actually out of hand, but still not worth the hassle and expense of getting some outside, professional help. Then he was 20 and there was no hope for it. He was just going to be difficult. And then along came family violence. I don’t understand. He certainly didn’t grow up that way.

Sure, substitute she for he and the sad story is unchanged. In this episode of Audio Tidbits Podcast, I revisit temper tantrums and the importance of managing them gently and thoughtfully when your child is very young. Please listen and think about it along with me.

It started with a temper tantrum. It didn’t amount to much. He was only 3 and the truth of the matter is that it was kind of cute. Then he was 15 and it was actually out of hand, but still not worth the hassle and expense of getting some outside, professional help. Then he was 20 and there was no hope for it. He was just going to be difficult. And then along came family violence. I don’t understand. He certainly didn’t grow up that way.

Sure, substitute she for he and the sad story is unchanged. In this episode of Audio Tidbits Podcast, I revisit temper tantrums and the importance of managing them gently and thoughtfully when your child is very young. Please listen and think about it along with me.

Do you know that there are refugees in Cleveland? Who are they; why are they there; should they be there? Please listen and decide for yourself.

Did you ever play cowboys and Indians? Maybe you are too young to have that childhood pastime as part of your history. You might even be so young that even knowing how to play cowboys and Indians didn’t make it into your skill set. If you want to test your non-digital playtime acuity, try this very short pop quiz.

Question:

When a few children – almost always all boys – got together to play cowboys and Indians, how did the kids decide who were the Indians?

Answer:

They usually didn’t. There were only cowboys. The Indians were a figment of their vivid imaginations.

Question:

What was the point of playing cowboys and Indians?

Answer:

To run around stealthily and somewhat randomly while shooting imaginary Indians with cap cracking six-shooters.

How did you do? If you passed the quiz with flying colors, you also know that the Indians always lost, and the cowboys never failed to vanquish those primitive savages. The good guys always won and the bad guys always either died during the battle or tucked tail and ran.

Are you up to another test of your non-digital acuity? If so, let’s play any variation of good guys and bad guys. The good guys were a lot like cowboys but were intent on ridding the range of outlaws and rustlers. The story changed only in the details and criminal transgressions.

Once I was a little squirt,

Silver buttons on my shirt,

I’d climb atop my wooden steed,

Be quickly off with lightening speed.

I’d ride the range from east to west,

A silver star pinned on my chest,

A holstered gun in easy reach,

Villains to catch and lessons to teach.

On winter days and summer nights,

Bar room brawls and wild gun fights,

My lawman life would twist and spin,

Nary a doubt about who would win.

The black hats fell; the white hats stood.

Justice prevailed; evil bested by good.

Rules were simple, no room for doubt.

Break the law, you get taken out.

The story could be continued in any of a thousand directions, but the theme never changes. It’s easy to tell the good guys from the bad guys, the winners from the losers. There is no ambiguity, no shades of gray. The world clearly splits into good and bad, right and wrong, just and unjust, the white hats and black hats.

I now know that our reality isn’t so easily understood and truly never was. That world of right versus wrong, good guys versus bad guys, just versus unjust was and still is but a myth perpetuated to shield unsuspecting children and naive adults from the harsh truth. Winners do cheat and cheaters frequently win. Right doesn’t always prevail over wrong. Police and priests don’t necessarily make moral choices or serve as good role models for the rest of us. Politicians and our civic leaders are often less committed to the welfare and well-being of the rest of us than to their personal interests and self-dealing schemes. Trustworthy news source is an oxymoron along with personal privacy and secure employment; and whatever you think is solid enough that you can take it to the bank is something to hold on to, since the bank may not be there when you arrive.

We find ourselves in what seems like a far different reality than the one we knew in years past. The President sometimes lies and misleads. Congress and our legislatures play power politics instead of pursuing the art of negotiation and compromise. The Supreme court in Washington and the Supreme courts in our states, along with the lower courts, are more political than objective, more partisan than neutral. The FBI and other public institutions are at least as controlled by interest groups and politicians as by justice, fairness, and the rule of law.