It’s like eating the worst toppings on a virtual private emoji pizza with the spiciest chocolate bath bombs you can make into ice cream.

It’s like buying ads for billions of dollars, only to find out the charging white noise is canceled because a lawsuit alleges we slam goldfish until we can put Wikipedia dates in the correct order.

It’s like eating across the wordle world with a pig heart, but we have to get rid of half of everything.

It’s like going to CES and finding all the food trends but it’s just a TikTok restaurant.

It’s like a very special holiday episode!

It’s like hacking Taco Bell with a hot peppery doctor and a bed full of Skittles.

It’s like deciding what food trends leave and stay for 2022.

It’s like trending Tik Toks playing at the dinner table, but all we’re eating are sardines with Santa.

It’s like driving to Papa Johns in my Apple, but not before I eat a cotton candy lobster with buttered PopTarts.

It’s like measuring our sleep with 800 pizzas on ad-free Twitter, and the end of bread is a cookie pizza with spicy McPlants.