The Hansel and Gretel Code

In episode 15 we deconstruct some famous celebrity recipes and then go shopping for used cars and kitchen appliances

I call it: the nuclear powered toaster oven

Part 1 [04:08] - in which we learn the original recipe for baking gingerbread cookies

Part 2 [11:33] - in which we cook up some Ayahuasca, hallucinate a scene from the Godfather, and find a month old box of Chinese take-out, um, fermenting, in the back of the fridge

Part 3 [17:35] - in which we re-boot our computers, er, I mean homefires, rent Angels with Dirty Faces, and then go kick some tires on a used car lot

Part 4 [35:11] - in which we discover that this recipe calls for goat meat, comes right out of a famous celebrity cookbook, and involves a Bond Girl

Part 5 [48:19] - in which we meet the inventor of the nuclear powered toaster oven

*transcripts and links for episode 15 are available at: betweenthelines.xyz

*Chapter Titles read by Anna Jacobsen*

*German Fairytale text read by Jürgen Lexow *

Music and Sound credits for this episode are SUPER-extensive and can be found on the website @ betweenthelines.xyz

special thanks to freesound.org for nearly all of kristo's awesome peanut gallery voices...

Talk to me...

and please take a listen to my other podcasts at: 

kristo.art

and

kristo.com

In this episode we find out why the deity is really a ham actor whose favorite hang out is that famous sleaze joint known as: Between a Rock and a Hard Place

Part 1 [01:40] - in which we find out why such a nasty, awful thing is happening to such a nice, humble guy

Part 2 [09:58] - in which we ask a few crucial questions, like: whaddya mean, US...??? and: Hey! Who left all of these dirty dishes???

Part 3 [15:25] - in which we join the holy orgy, kama sutra... er, I mean, uh, you know: Transformation can be fun

Part 4 [24:45] - in which we find out that we might be on the wrong road — and probably because somebody sabotaged our GPS

Part 5 [29:24] - in which we end up at Niagara Falls — again — and this time, we can just about see someone poking their nose through that huge wall of water

Part 6 [41:50] - in which we find out exactly what NOT to do when things go south

*transcripts and links for all episodes of The Hansel and Gretel Code are available at: betweenthelines.xyz

*Chapter Titles read by Anna Jacobsen*

*Music and Sound credits for this episode are SUPER-extensive and can be found on the website @ betweenthelines.xyz

*special thanks to freesound.org for nearly all of kristo's awesome peanut gallery voices...

Talk to me…

In this episode we ask lots of annoying questions, there's an ominous knock on the door, and we all end up on Saturday Night Live...

welcome to Episode 13 of The Hansel and Gretel Code!

Part 1 [01:48] - in which we set off in search of a nice, calming grande mocha frappuccino

Part 2 [04:03] - in which we find ourselves in a George Romero movie with zombies and trolls, and nothing but a shovel for a weapon

Part 3 [11:04] - in which we find out that we really don’t need a boat after all, although we do have to be careful about who we open the door to

*transcripts and links for this episode (13) are available at: betweenthelines.xyz

*Chapter Titles read by Anna Jacobsen*

*Music and Sound credits for this episode (13) are SUPER-extensive and can be found on the website @ betweenthelines.xyz

with special thanks to freesound.org for nearly all of kristo's awesome peanut gallery voices...

Talk to me…

In this episode we go grocery shopping, find an original Roman recipe for soul food, and crash a medieval Super Bowl party to catch the play of the millennium on instant replay...

[04:48] Part 1 - in which we say grace and get lost looking for the frozen pizzas

[09:58] Part 2 - in which we reach the checkout counter and find that some demon is demanding our whole paycheck... it rains like a... and um, we do get really potty-mouthed

[17:29] Part 3 - in which we turn on Wide World of Sports and watch a 3 day medieval Super Bowl played in the snow

[28:56] Part 4 - in which we run into the earliest soup nazi, and find out that Shark Week is coming early this year

*transcripts and links for episode 12 are available at: betweenthelines.xyz

and please take a listen to my other podcasts at: 

kristo.art

and

kristo.com

*Chapter Titles read by Anna Jacobsen*

* Librivox recording of the baptized version of the tale read by Bob Neufeld*

*Music and Sound credits for this episode are SUPER-extensive and can be found on the website @ betweenthelines.xyz

with special thanks to freesound.org for nearly all of kristo's awesome peanut gallery voices...

Talk to me…

In this episode we have dinner with the Donners and the Dickens, somebody says grace, and then we have a limbo party...

[03:53] Part 1  - in which we fail to read the fine print and get stuck with a bunch of insurance disclaimers

[06:30] Part 2 - in which we have a medieval 9/11, read about it in a Norwegian novel, and seat the Donner Party for dinner

[10:41] Part 3 -in which life throws us a limbo party to see how low we can go

[17:07] Part 4 - in which we turn to prayer as an answer to all our questions

*transcripts and links for episode 11 are available at: betweenthelines.xyz

and please take a listen to my other podcasts at: 

kristo.art

and

kristo.com

*Chapter Titles read by Anna Jacobsen*

*German Fairytale text read by Jürgen Lexow *

*Music and Sound credits for this episode are SUPER-extensive and can be found on the website @ betweenthelines.xyz

with special thanks to freesound.org for all of kristo's awesome peanut gallery voices...

Talk to me…

In this episode we have a whole lotta friends over for cards, and serve pie for dessert...

[01:02] Part 1 - in which we find 2 Super-Virgos following their bliss

[04:03] Part 2 - in which we travel the world and knock-out the knock-offs

[09:34] Part 3 - in which we moonlight as fairytale census-takers

[12:01] Part 4 - in which we have 4 for dessert

[16:13] Part 5 - in which we take the road less traveled

[21:30] Part 6 - the four horsemen of — WHAT?

[29:21] Part 7 - in which we borrow the Time Machine for a trip to the doctor, and then hang on to it for a second opinion

*transcripts and links for episode 10 are available at: betweenthelines.xyz

and please take a listen to my other podcasts at: 

kristo.art

and

kristo.com

Music and Sound credits for this episode are SUPER-extensive and can be found on the website @ betweenthelines.xyz

with special thanks to freesound.org for all of kristo's awesome peanut gallery voices...

In this episode we go 9 hardscrabble rounds, and land a couple of massive haymakers...

Part 1 [01:31] - Loser! 

Part 2 [03:47] - Life Lessons and Library Cards

Part 3 [06:57] - Tobacco Road

Part 4 [10:07] - Powerball Culture

Part 5 [13:36] - Connect the Dots

Part 6 [16:58] - Libtards or Deplorables?

Part 7 [20:11] - objects in mirror are closer than they appear

Part 8 [24:48] - Practice, Practice, Practice

Part 9 [28:55] - The Wife and Kids

complete transcripts and links for this episode available on the website (betweenthelines.xyz): here

vocal reading of Hänsel und Gretel / das Brüderchen und das Schwesterchen (in German) by the great Jürgen Lexow

vocal reading of Episode 9 chapter titles by Anna Jacobsen

Music and sound Credits available on the website: here

special thanks to freesound.org for kristo's peanut gallery voices...

and to filmmusic.io for:

Bleeping Demo by Kevin MacLeod

In this episode, we've got the Medieval version of "Hair!" - (or is that Hair-Shirt?)...

betweenthelines.xyz

transcripts, links and all sound credits available on the website: here

Schubert - Piano Sonata no. 20 in A major, D. 959 - I. Allegro performed by Paul Pitman and courtesy of musopen.org - This work is licensed under the Creative Commons 0 License.

Schubert - Piano Sonata no. 19 in C minor, D. 958 - I. Allegro performed by Paul Pitman and courtesy of musopen.org - This work is licensed under the Creative Commons 0 License.

Schubert - Piano Sonata no. 21 in B-flat major, D. 960 - II. Andante sostenuto performed by Paul Pitman and courtesy of musopen.org - This work is licensed under the Creative Commons 0 License.

Schubert - Rosamunde, Op. 26 Overture (The Magic Harp, D.644) performed by Das Orchester Tsumugi and courtesy of musopen.org - This work is licensed under the Creative Commons 0 License.

Beethoven - Piano  Sonata No. 12 in A Flat Major, Op. 26 - III. Marcia funebre sulla morte d'un eroe performed by Paul Pitman and courtesy of musopen.org - This work is licensed under the Creative Commons 0 License.

Schubert - Six Musical Moments, D. 780 - III. Allegro moderato in F minor performed by Sofja Gülbadamova (licensed under Creative Commons Attribution 3.0) and courtesy of musopen.org

Woodcutting is Risky Business...

see the website for transcripts and links...

betweenthelines.xyz

Music Credits:

Haydn - Piano Sonata in F major, Hob. XVI:23

I. Allegro moderato

II. Adagio

III. Finale - Presto

performed by Ivan Ilic and licensed under Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 - courtesy of musopen.org

***

Mozart - Requiem in D minor, K. 626 - III. Sequence - Lacrymosa (For Piano - Liszt)

performed by Markus Staab licensed under Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 courtesy of musopen.org

***

Mozart - Idomeneo, K. 366 - Act III. Torna la pace - Idomeneo I - courtesy of European Archive and musopen.org

here we are in the religion section of the library, searching for our woodcutter's family album...

Music Credits:

"das Brüderchen und das Schwesterchen" voice actor: Jürgen Lexow

Schubert - Six Musical Moments, D. 780 - III. Allegro moderato in F minor performed by Sofja Gülbadamova (licensed under Creative Commons Attribution 3.0) and courtesy of musopen.org

Saint-Saëns - Carnival of the Animals - VII. Aquarium, performed by Seattle Youth Symphony and licensed under Creative Commons Attribution 4.0

Venice Church Bells - courtesy of freesoundjon01 and freesound.org - This work is licensed under the Creative Commons 0 License.

Canto monjas monasterio de Quilvo Chile - courtesy of sonidistapo and freesound.org - This work is licensed under the Attribution License.

Binaural catholic gregorian chant mass liturgy - courtesy of ramagochi and freesound.org - This work is licensed under the Attribution License.

Beethoven - Piano Sonata no. 23 in F minor 'Appassionata', Op. 57 - I. Allegro assai performed by Paul Pitman - courtesy of musopen.org

Link to film: Into Great Silence