the HARDER SHAFT

In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak to Jad Patrick about losing a good friend to suicide. Jad shares the emotions, grief process and the big changes in his life after the experience.

When you’re coping with the suicide of a loved one, it’s normal to feel a wide range of emotions, such as:

Shock

“This can’t be happening.” Right after loss, it can be hard to accept what’s happened. You may feel numb or want to deny the truth. Shock can have a purpose: it protects you from the initial pain of the loss, helping you get through things.

Anger

“How could they do this to me?” You may feel angry with your loved one, yourself, or medical professionals who couldn’t help. It’s normal to feel angry. Try to talk it though and understand your feelings.

Confusion

“Why is this happening?” You may not understand why something so tragic has happened, and that’s okay. It's hard, sometimes impossible, to comprehend why someone would choose to take their own life. It may be better to accept that you'll never fully understand, instead of forcing yourself to come up with an answer that makes sense to you. Focus your energy on accepting and coping with your feelings.

Guilt

“Why didn’t I notice something was wrong?” Try not to criticise yourself about what you did or didn’t do – it’s not your fault. Feeling guilty is completely normal, because we often blame ourselves when things go wrong, but it's not something to carry around with you. Talk to someone you trust about how you feel.

Despair

“I’m too sad to do anything” Loss from suicide is traumatic; allow yourself time to grieve. If you’re feeling especially down, your reaction is normal. Remember that there isn’t a typical response to loss; grieving is as individual as the people we’ve loved.

There are things you can do to make dealing with death easier:

Accept your feelings

People experience all kinds of emotions after a death, some you might not be able to predict, but they're all valid. It’s okay to feel the things that you do.

Take care of yourself and your family

Eating well, exercising, and sleeping will help you get through each day and move forward. Taking it one day at a time and focusing on small tasks will make things easier to deal with. What may feel like an impossible situation now, will get better.

Reach out and help others deal with this loss

Sharing stories can help everyone cope, and helping others will have the benefit of making you feel better as well. Speak to the people in your life who are also grieving, or whom you can trust. Sharing your thoughts and feelings will help you feel less alone, and remind you that there are people out there who support you.

Remember and celebrate the life of your loved one

Honour your relationship in a way that feels right to you – perhaps you can plant a garden in their memory, donate to their favourite charity, or frame photos of fun times. Try and remember the best moments you shared together.

LIFE LINE:

https://www.lifeline.org.au

BEYOND BLUE:

https://www.lifeline.org.au

Jad Patrick

https://www.facebook.com/jadpatricknaturaltherapies

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n this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak to Damian Brady about how a string of life misfortunes lead him to depression and anxiety. One particular session with his psychologist changed his whole life, as he was asked to consider volunteering.

He now manages four charity stores for Sacred Heart Mission. Damian talks to us about what it means to volunteer with a charity, both physically and emotionally.

SACRED HEART MISSION - Volunteer

https://www.sacredheartmission.org/get-involved/volunteer

PLEASE CHECK FOR THE VOLUNTEER WEBSITE IN YOUR CAPITAL CITY:

MELBOURNE:

https://www.volunteeringvictoria.org.au

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In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak to Cam Rosin about his upbringing in America, and how his parents taught him to always be himself from birth.

His passion, insights, attitude and inner self acceptance is so infectious. His beliefs drive him to see the world from a loving place, where he seeks fulfilment every day.

Being your true authentic self means what you say in life aligns with what your actions. Your authentic self goes beyond what you do for a living, what possessions you own, or who you are to someone (mom, brother, girlfriend). It is who you are at your deepest core.

Practicing self-acceptance helps you to realise your qualities, both bad and good, and eases feelings of guilt and unhappiness. When we begin to accept who we are, we set ourselves up for improvement. While practicing self-acceptance, you will uncover hidden gifts and talents that you didn't know about yourself.

Although most people would define authenticity as acting in accordance with your idiosyncratic set of values and qualities, research has shown that people feel most authentic when they conform to a particular set of socially approved qualities, such as being extroverted, emotionally stable, conscientious, intellectual.

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In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak to DICK SAVVY about being the Naked Barber, his Self Acceptance and how the gay community can transform itself via self refection.

DICK Savvy, a.k.a the Naked Barber, is a well-known figure in the Sydney and Melbourne gay scene, having advertised his services in the gay press and hosted several events in clubs.

While there are many have engaged in The Naked Barber’s service, most don’t quite understand what is involved.

For those who are curious enough, but not quite brave enough to enquire, media group PLGRM have teamed with Savvy to create a short five-minute documentary on what is reportedly the world’s first and only naked men’s grooming service.

The insightful film has Savvy explain his service and why he does what he does.

“Having a normal job does not appeal to me,” he said.

And on repeat business: “Most women go in for a weekly blow dry… I get a few clients who come in for a weekly scrotum shave.”

Enjoy a grooming service like no other with all the fetish grooming details, including Hot Towels, Hot Wax, Cutthroat Shaving and he will even lather you up in Shaving Cream!

Are you into role play or have a fantasy or scene you would like to play out?

The Naked Barber can tailor a package for you which could include your wildest fantasy.

From haircuts to head shaving, body clipping to waxing, Richard can satisfy all your grooming needs in his fully equipped private studio located on Oxford St, Sydney, Australia.

NAKED BARBER:

https://thenakedbarber.com

INSTAGRAM:

The Naked Barber (@richardsavvy_thenakedbarber)

NAKED BARBER DOCUMENTARY:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxO5TM8SzHE

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In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak with KEVAN WALSH about Leather BDSM, Kink, the global Leather Community, and the rules around consensual sex.

The subculture is thought to have grown out of the post-World-War-II biker scene, which tended be dominated by uniforms, buzz cuts and military honor codes. It was an aesthetic that resonated with gay men who couldn’t identify with the more effete stereotypes of the time.

Those gay men formed motorcycle clubs like the Satyrs in Los Angeles and the Warlocks in San Francisco. They covered themselves in leather, conforming to a look of masculine independence that came to mainstream attention by way of Marlon Brando’s 1953 film The Wild One. Chicago’s Gold Coast was the first gay bar to cater to the leather scene in 1958, and it was there that IML began in the late Seventies.

At the time that the community formed, being discovered as queer was enough to ruin a person’s life. Police conducted routine raids of gay bars, with their victims identified by names in newspapers. Even in the relative safety of the mid-century gay enclaves, an interest in kinky sex led to stigma and ostracism.

“The word ‘leather’ was the code word for men in the Forties. Back then, it was a way of asking, ‘Are you into rough sex, bondage, S&M?

The leather culture denotes practices and styles of dress organized around sexual activities that involve leather garments, such as leather jackets, vests, boots, chaps, harnesses, or other items. Wearing leather garments is one way that participants in this culture self-consciously distinguish themselves from mainstream sexual cultures. Leather culture is most visible in gay communities and most often associated with gay men (enthusiasts are nicknamed “leathermen”), but it is also reflected in various ways in the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and straight worlds. Many people associate leather culture with BDSM (Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, Sado/Masochism, also called “SM” or “S&M”) practices and its many subcultures. But for others, wearing black leather clothing is an erotic fashion that expresses heightened masculinity or the appropriation of sexual power; love of motorcycles, motorcycle clubs and independence; and/or engagement in sexual kink or leather fetishism.

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In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak with Jarrod Boucher about the volunteer run White Owl for MENS Health Awareness, losing mates, and the stigma around Prostate Cancer.

WHITE OWL FOR MEN'S HEALTH AWARENESS INCORPORATED is a small-scale charity established in 2017. Their main activity is registered as health promotion primarily serving adults - aged 25 to under 65 people in rural/regional/remote communities males.

They promote and engage with members of the community to raise awareness of mens health issues and encourage more men to be proactive in looking after their physical and mental health. - they hold an annual AFL event to raise awareness of men's health and raise money to support the Australian Prostate Centre (APC). In 2020 they were only able to run a raffle due to the COVID restrictions, however the funds raised were dedicated to the North Melbourne holistic mens health clinic that caters for the diagnosis & care of men with both physical & mental health needs.

WHITE OWL MENS HEALTH AWARENESS:

LinkedIn - White Owl for Men's Health Awareness | LinkedIn

Facebook - White Owl for Men's Health - Home

Prostate Cancer Foundation:

https://www.prostate.org.au

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In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak with DINO HIRA. We discuss his experience with depression working in the WA mining industry, how suicidal thoughts transformed him to find inner peace, and his experience on MARRIED AT FIRST SIGHT. Now Dino is known as Hong Kongs modern male yogi, utilising all his experience to write his book - A Miner Who Wins Inner Peace.

When Dino felt like he was on the other side of his battle with depression, he knew that it was time to share his story and insights with others.

He began by volunteering at a maximum-security prison, teaching meditation classes to inmates. He admitted that the night before he began teaching this class, he had trouble sleeping…

“It was my first-time teaching meditation, and the prison where I was going to teach was featured on a Netflix documentary about the world’s toughest prisons.”

At first, only a few participants joined his class and Dino was unsure his teachings were having his desired impact. But quickly, 2 participants turned into 4, and 4 turned into 6. Eventually, Dino’s class was one of the most popular in the program and full of inmates eager to transform their mindset in prison through meditation.

DINO HIRA;

https://www.themodernyogi.co

Instagram:

Dino Hira (@dino_hira)

BOOK: A Miner Who Wins Inner Peace.

https://www.amazon.com.au/MINER-WHO-WINS-INNER-PEACE-ebook/dp/B089W75964

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In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak with the accomplished Melbourne artist Ross Watson. We discuss his love of painting, the meditative benefits utilised in is craft, mental health, and his latest 20th year anniversary gallery exhibition .

Ross Watson (born in Brisbane, Australia in 1962) is an artist. He has exhibited in many solo and group exhibitions since 1984, including important surveys of Australian and international contemporary art at the National Gallery of Australia, the National Gallery of Victoria, and in the Toronto and Melbourne International Art Fairs. He has been described as a 'proud, gay man', and sexuality has inspired several of his works.

Ross's work includes portraits of Australian former rugby league footballer Ian Roberts, and Olympic Champion Matthew Mitcham

In 2012, Ross celebrated 25 years as a professional artist. His art is included in the collections of the National Gallery of Australia, National Gallery of Victoria, National Portrait Gallery, and significant private collections including Sir Elton John, James J. O'Donnell and James D, Wolfensohn. He also did free work in aid of the AIDS charity, the Terence Higgins Trust.

The internationally released book which includes an interview with the artist by former High Court Justice, the Hon. Michael Kirby, is published by Bruno Gmünder Verlag Germany.

Celebrating the 20th Anniversary of the Ross Watson Gallery:

24 April - 9 May, 2021

11am - 5pm

Saturday and Sunday

ROSS WATSON GALLERY

465 Nicholson St, Carlton North

Melbourne, Australia

https://rosswatson.com

National Portrait Gallery:

https://www.portrait.gov.au/people/ross-watson-1962

www.facebook.com

Art Gallery › Ross Watson

Instagram:

@rosswatsongallery

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In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak with BRENDON GIEBEL Founder & Break Through Expert at Advanced Men's Development and a Master Practitioner of NLP & Time Line Therapy™.

He helps men escape the grip of depression, anxiety and low self-esteem while implementing the steps to succeed as a man in this current world.

Advanced Men’s Development has helped men release attachments from past events such as PTSD, childhood abuse, anxiety, chronic pain and depression, as well as fear, shyness, low self-esteem and confidence, to name a few.

After struggling in his early 20's and being one decision away from ending it all, he spent 6 years climbing out of the dark hole he was in. Now he is leading the way for men to do that same and become kings in their own lives. His first goal to build the #1 total training facility for men in Australia by Dec 2023, and second to personally impact the lives of 1 million men.

Website to book a free "Restart Your Life" consult and learn more www.advancedmensdevelopment.com.au. Use the code SMB15 when booking to recieve 15% off.

Follow Brendon Giebel Facebook https://www.facebook.com/brendon.giebel

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In this episode of the Secret MENS Business podcast we speak with Shaun Williams, the creator of the GAY FATHERS Facebook support group

We discuss his coming out to his ex wife, how he told his children, meeting then man of his dreams, and feeling rejected within the gay community. His story is embowering, brave and filled with self acceptance.

As awkward and shameful as it might feel, each of us is unique in who or what we find desirable, and while sexual desire is often mysterious or even frightening, when you boil it down it’s related to longings for love, affection, and safety.

Facebook: GAY FATHERS:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/3545615388793578

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