The HERE.together Podcast

What would it be like if we thought about the current situation as if it were a fable, told to us by an elder?  What would we learn?  How would it end? What if we could tell a story that could help us create the safe, sustainable, equitable future that we want for ourselves and our children?

Our friend and fellow traveler on the path, Rowdy Duncan returns to help us unpack the pandemic, the protests, and the times we’re currently navigating.  He shares an indigenous and earth-based perspective he’s been exploring to make sense of what he’s witnessing and experiencing, and that he’s using as a tool to blaze his trail through this complex environment.

Rowdy is on the communications faculty at Phoenix College.  He teaches Intercultural Communication, Diversity & Inclusion studies, he’s active in youth leadership development, AND he’s a huge advocate for community and restorative modes of justice.

Rowdy is also the Writer, Producer, and Host of The Inclusive Activism Podcast, which you will definitely want to check out.

All this makes Rowdy the perfect person for us to have on the show to dive into the deep end with us and see what we find there.

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How does a kind young man get involved with a hate group and how does he get out and build a life of compassion and empathy?

Our guest this week is Hayden Gebler.  A “normal kid” growing up in Northern AZ, Hayden had a huge need for connection and belonging. His journey toward that belonging took a dark turn that resulted in Hayden spending several years in a white supremicist gang.  Now at 26, his life is radically different and his heart is filled with love and understanding instead of hate and bigotry.

In this episode, Hayden talks very frankly and openly about what caused him to veer off and what brought him back.

Trigger warning: In this episode we talk about drug use, self-harm, suicide attempts, and violence. We don’t dwell on any of it, nor glorify it, but you might want to choose the right time to listen to this podcast.

White Supremacist Prison Gangs in the United States

Suicide Prevention Resources

What happens when an old college friend has his novel adapted by Jordan Peele and JJ Abrams for an HBO series?  You invite him on your podcast, that’s what.

Our guest this week is the writer Matt Ruff, author of seven, very different books. We talk about the craft of writing great characters, the luck involved in getting published, and how to become an overnight success in only 35 years. We dive deep into the creation of characters who are experiencing very different lives and challenges than we are. And we talk about how critical it is now to live with those kinds of characters and learn from them. 

Matt's books span the gamut, from speculative fiction, literary fantasy, alternative history and gothic horror. His third book, Set this House in Order, won the James Tiptree, Jr. Award for it's incredibly unique exploration of gender. Matt's sixth book, Lovecraft Country, raises the pitch of the horror of racism with a nasty dose of Lovecraftian supernatural horror. That's the book that caught the eye of Jordan Peele. 

Set This House in Order changed Charles's notion of the self and, not to put to fine a point on it, this episode completely changed our understanding of racism. We're really curious what you think about it. 

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What makes Prescott (and the rest of the Quad Cities) strong? What makes us unique and successful when things get tough? Our first collaborative episode attempts to answer those questions.

This week we are really, stupendously pleased to share with you the first episode of a whole new podcast series. A couple months ago, after interviewing Breeanya Hinkel on this podcast and then partnering with her and her posse of engaged business leaders on the Women in Science episode, we hatched this new project, a new, separate podcast that will feature some of the same stories and interviews from the Prescott Woman print magazine.

For the June/July issue, the writers and staff at Prescott Woman Magazine started collecting stories of resilience and creativity in the face of Covid 19. They called the resulting cover story “Prescott Strong.”

This first episode of the Prescott Woman Podcast is an expanded audio version of that story. We trust that you will find it inspiring and meaningful because the voices are those of your neighbors and friends.

Show Notes:

The following women and men contributed quotes:

The following people shared their trials and triumphs with us in extended interviews.

The following local musicians provided the music you heard throughout the episode. Follow these links to more of their music:

Subscribe to the monthly Prescott Women Podcast.

Get ready for next week’s episode:

We’re both struggling with grief, anger, and shame this week. Are you? Our country is showing it's deep fracture lines and the pain is real. Creating justice through thoughtful, individual, and collective action is only goal that matters  We know it’s not easy, but let’s spend some time together getting to the bottom of our feelings and beliefs and then moving toward some useful action.

We had planned this week to talk about creativity, but the police killings (George Floyd, Tony McDade, Sean Reed and Breonna Taylor), the unequal way COVID 19 is infecting and killing black and brown people, and the long-term affect the economic crisis is going to have on already marginalized people won’t let us talk about anything other than race today. And really, these issues directly relate to the pillars of this podcast, particularly community and masculinity.

We’ll be talking about our own personal experiences, knowing that white experience so often drowns out the experiences of others. But it’s what we have to work with and from.  We live in a VERY white area, but we feel strongly that we are also part of national and global communities, and we’ll do what we can to facilitate conversations that serve all.

We’re going to do our best to create an open space for one another and you, our beloved audience. We’re going to bring our usual blend of curiosity, warmth, and empathy to this episode. But, you all should know, there is pain and anger here… Please, if it shows up in my voice or if it shows up in your head, please breath and lean in. If we pull back, we’re done for. We need you.

Anti-racist activists are making it very clear. We live in an unjust and violent system and it is up to us - middling white folks - to get off the fence and off the couch and fix it. We hope this exploration will take us in the right direction.

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Music Credits: Metamorphosis - Phillip Glass

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When Bill Konigsberg was a teen, there were no novels featuring young gay men.  Thanks to him, gay teens today can’t say the same. In his latest novel, though, the sexual preference of his protagonists is almost incidental. Max and Jordan are in the middle becoming adults, and their struggle to integrate pain, joy, capacity, and weakness into their wholeness makes this book totally relevant for those of us who are still growing… that is - everybody.

Bill Konigsberg is the award-winning author of six young adult novels. THE PORCUPINE OF TRUTH won the PEN Center USA Literary Award and the Stonewall Book Award in 2016. OPENLY STRAIGHT won the Sid Fleischman Award for Humor, was a finalist for the Amelia Elizabeth Walden Award and Lambda Literary Award in 2014 and has been translated into five languages. His debut novel, OUT OF THE POCKET, won the Lambda Literary Award in 2009. THE MUSIC OF WHAT HAPPENS, was released in February of 2019, received two starred reviews, and has been optioned for a film. His next novel, THE BRIDGE, will be released in the fall of 2020. In 2018, The National Council of Teachers of English (NCTE)’s Assembly on Literature for Adolescents (ALAN) established the Bill Konigsberg Award for Acts and Activism for Equity and Inclusion through Young Adult Literature.

Before Bill wrote for young adults, he was a sports writer and editor for ESPN and the Associated Press. Charles met and got to know Bill through their shared work helping create initiations for men - the Mankind Project - and boys at Boys to Men. Charles was immediately drawn to Bill’s intelligence, vulnerability, and attentiveness.

Bill lives in Phoenix, Arizona, with his husband, Chuck and their two Australian Labradoodles, Mabel and Buford, who complete him.  Mabel and Buford have professional glamour shots on Bill’s website. I fell hard for Buford - you might, too.

Bill’s books - the one we read, anyway - are filled with real people of all stripes, not token stereotypes or caricatures.  They are dealing with real and relatable problems and struggles, and being gay isn’t the most notable thing about them.  They are regular people who just happen to be gay.  Bill creates a world that is familiar for some of us - especially those of us who grew up in the arts or in places like Jerome, AZ - where being gay and out is unremarkable. We found it refreshing and a relief to spend time there and we really loved getting to know Jordan and Max and their friends and family.  We definitely want to read the rest of Bill’s books, especially the new book: The Bridge that is available for pre-order now.

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Resources:

The ManKind Project

Mental Health Helpline

Crisis Hotline 

Is the masked man a hero or a villain?

These days we’re seeing some very emotional division around the decision to wear a mask in public and whether staying home is cowardly or going out is reckless. Today we are going to dig into that and see what’s under the mask.

In this episode, we’ll be looking at the value of freedom, definitions of masculinity, ideas of strength, and how our society is structured as well as experimenting with empathy, framing, and connection.  Charles will have a rant and Kelly will play devil’s advocate.

So stay tuned if you want support around doing the right thing, even when it’s unpopular [with fringe elements]. We want to know what you think about how to balance freedom with responsibility so we hope you’ll comment in the Rocket Feather Community Lab Group or by leaving a phone message at Anchor.fm/rocketfeather

References:

Charles's Blog Post "New Strength vs. Old Strength and The Great Mask Debate"

Charles's TEDx Talk "Redefining Strength for the 21st Century"

Vanity Fair Article by Ed Yong Why the Pandemic is So Confusing

Stasia Rivera’s Website 

Daryl Davis: Crossing Boundaries with Respect

Earl Hipp, Man Making

Bill Konigsberg Website

Music Credits: Bensounds

Are you missing live music and the sense of community you feel when out on the town? Are you craving connection with the creative energy of your favorite musicians and artists?

This week we’ve got the certified biggest voice in town plus our favorite guitar genius - in the HOUSE!  Literally, in our house - don’t worry we stayed in our own corners.

Grammy-nominated singer Candace Devine and local rock god Drew Hall join us for a no holds barred talk about creativity, re-invention, and community, as well as playing some music to lift your spirits. We used several of the fan-submitted questions to pry into the life and history and thoughts of our passionately creative guests.

Candace has been a professional singer since her early 20s, working with Christina Aguilera, Styx, the Four Tops and many others in the recording studio and out on the road touring.  In this episode, we find out that she is both a champion equestrian coach AND a cat enchantress. Also, she swears like a sailor, so proceed at your own risk #totally worth it.

Drew is a former banker who defied the 9-5 life at his earliest opportunity, going on to be in every kind of band, teach guitar to young and old musicians alike, and curate exceptional music shows here in Prescott.  In pre-Covid times, Drew could be spotted playing with the Cheektones, Summa Totius, THiS Trio with Slim Gamble of Lady Antebellum fame, Drew & Anton, and many many more!

3This podcast episode hits a lot of the superlative buttons: longest, loudest, biggest recording challenge, most cat input, most social media engagement, and definitely the most musical. Candace and Drew played two songs for us live, and we play you the recording of “Don’t Worry Child (Rosalyn)” their newest collaboration and entry into the NPR Tiny Desk Concert. “Don’t Worry Child is ostensibly about Drew’s daughter, but in our view, it’s really for and about all of us living through these stressful times.

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What if relationships could be easier? What if you knew why your teen, your toddler or your partner was “giving you that face?” And what if you knew how to respond in a way that didn’t suck? What if you could build rather than damage your relationships?

Well this week, we got to talk with a relationship and parenting wizard who has developed a simple system to help us understand ourselves and each other. She explains how, from that foundation of empathy, we can use her basic tools to navigate conflict or misunderstanding to build the connection we all crave. Plus, she helped me figure out how to get the trash to the curb on time.

Our Guest, Stasia Rivera, is a family systems, trauma, and addictions therapist/coach with 25 years experience helping people reach their peaks. Her practice is a unique combination of applied neuroscience, systems thinking, and common sense. She and her team recently recognized that families and young people are experiencing new challenges during this pandemic. They pivoted their whole business model to respond to these needs and are launching a range of accessible and affordable classes and resources. Check them out at IUGOConnect.org. 

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Psych Theory Trading Cards

What’s it like to work in the Arctic while riding out the pandemic in Arizona?  What’s it like to meet this challenge with a giant heart, a brilliant brain, and a 4-year-old?

International researcher, advocate for women in science, mom, and authentic human, Olivia Lee joins us on this week’s podcast to talk through the challenges of conducting climate research during a pandemic, being separated from family overseas, and coping with the weight of feeling like it’s never enough.  I’m not a brilliant scientist, but I’m guessing those are things we can all relate to.  Listen on to hear how Olivia’s deep empathy and respect drive her work and keep her going in difficult times.

Increasing our capacity for the “unpleasant” feelings is one of the main goals we have here at RocketFeather.  If we can be with those difficult feelings and over time, stop judging ourselves for having them, we are well on our way to being responsive humans rather than reactive ones.  That means we can be there for each other instead of just worrying about ourselves.

So thank  you all for hanging in here with us as we grow in empathy and resilience and love.  Olivia Lee is such a great model for this kind of strength and we feel so privileged to talk with her and count her as a friend.

We hope this healing conversation will continue in the RocketFeather Community Lab, so reach out with your questions and answers and let’s help each other through this time - let’s do that and more.  Let’s help each other redefine who we get to be on the other end of it.  What are you leaving behind and what are you bringing with you?  We want to know.

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Books, Podcasts & Poems

Organizations