The Homestay Kitchen: Cultural Connections with International Students who Study Abroad

Helllllloooooo! Long time no chat! We were scheduled to come back in early March and then the pandemic struck. Now we are all physically distancing and staying at home, so the Homestay Kitchen had to re-work our podcasting schedule to fit our new routine. In the meantime, we thought we'd check in with you. How are you doing? Erin is now the multi-tasker extraordinaire working from home while maneuvering all five of her kids which includes two students. Mary is also navigating working from home while everyone else is also home, so finding a new routine has been challenging. In this episode, Erin is home with our emergency microphone and we recorded this conversation over the internet to make sure we are still social distancing. We wanted to pass along how we are doing, what the homestay situation has been like for us and people we know and finally what to do if you do still have students with you in this ever-evolving situation. All our families are healthy and safe and we hope yours are too. Please let us know how you are and if you do have a student with you, how you are all holding up. You can email us at [email protected] or leave us a voice note over on Instagram. Stay strong and we hope this episode can be a bit of light for you during this unprecedented time in our lives.

Key Points From This Episode:

• How Mary's plans have changed.
• Erin gives an update on her students.#itsafluidsituation
• We talk about family bonding during COVID.
• Activities to do with your students.
• How are you coping? Let us know. #virtualhugs
• Check in on your students.
• Stay safe and take care.

Links:

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Whoop! Whoop! We are back! Time to throw a dance party! Or in our case, maybe give you some virtual hugs. How have you been since we last chatted? How many students have you hosted since our break? Perhaps you also had students come and go during this time. Or maybe you've decided this is the year that you'll be hosting your very first student. Whatever your situation is, we're here to guide you through all the challenges it may take to have a successful student placement and ultimately, a lasting relationship. Because when you open the doors to your home to a stranger, in our case a student, you can create intimate experiences that can blossom to a whole new level. And hey, your student is only a stranger for the first 5 minutes, and then it's time to get to know them!

So for today's episode, it's time to review what we've been up to, including how Mary needs to take her own advice because she's hosting her first student in almost a year very soon!

Time to catch up with what we've been up to and we'd love to hear what you've been up to too with your students. What was an amazing experience that will forever be cemented in your memory? What had you laughing all through the night? Or what was the last straw that had you end your student relationship? Let us know all the good and bad stories and you could be featured on our show. Email us at [email protected].

We're glad to be back, so here we are without further adieu.

For full show notes and to learn more about the show, please visit www.homestaykitchen.com

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It's coming to the end of the year and some students may be leaving or some students may be heading home just for the winter break. Either way, when it's time to drag the luggage out and dust off that passport, we need to start thinking about our pre-departure rituals. What is it like when your student finally leaves? What strategies are you going to put into place when it comes to saying goodbye?

In this episode, we tackle the end of the student homestay experience. And since we are talking about goodbyes, the podcast is going to go on a little vacation too.

We, Erin and Mary, will be taking the rest of the year and early 2020 to be with family and celebrate all the winter holidays. In the meantime, take a listen to some of our past 40 plus episodes and catch up if you're new to our show. We'd also love to hear from you about any topic from our episodes or... if you have ideas for future episodes, please let us know! Leave us a voice note and email us at [email protected]. Enjoy the rest of the year and have a wicked 2020!

Key Points From This Episode:

• #wearenotonabreak
• Erin goes through the steps of how she says goodbye to her students. #wailandcryandrefusetogettheirsuitcasesout
• When do you start to say goodbye? #weliveindenial
• Erin opens up about her hardest goodbye.
• We talk about the things students leave behind.
• Mary shares her tradition of goodbye gifts. #mybagisfull
• Connecting over good food. We chat about our special nights out with students.
• In what way are Mary and Erin completely different?
• When airport goodbyes could use some boundaries. #wrongtonewrongzone
• Erin talks about the turmoil of saying goodbye to your student at the airport.
• When your student's luggage is overweight.
• Mary says sweep!
• How did Erin shock Mary?

Links: Episode 45: Boundaries and Rules During Homestay Experiences Google Translate Air Canada

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Boundaries. We've all got them or we should all have some in place. There are limits and rules to all sorts of things during a homestay experience. Boundaries around the house, food, laundry, safety issues, and even personal boundaries. What are they and how can we enforce them?

In this episode, we share our own set of boundaries and how we communicate these rules to our students. What are your boundaries around the house? What challenges do you face when applying these rules? Let us know by emailing us at [email protected]. We'd love to share your feedback on an upcoming episode and answer your questions! In the meantime, listen in to hear what boundaries we've set up for our households.

Key Points From This Episode:

• Mary and her bubble and how it relates to personal boundaries.
• Confessions from Mary: we chat about the student info sheet/welcome letters
• Bathroom boundaries. Mary shares a story about a miscommunication she had with a student around bathroom usage.
• We talk about food and curfews.
• Erin's rules around communication when her students are out socializing. #peaceofmind
• We discuss our process of setting out boundaries, rules and expectations.
• Mel's experience with a student who invaded her personal boundaries.
• When you need to set up boundaries around food.
• We dive into the boundaries we've set up around hosting with our kids.
• What caused drama in Erin's house?
• Which household rule does Erin's husband refuse to follow?
• How we show that we need personal boundaries.
• We check in about internet usage.
• Talking about boundaries… do you peek in your student's room when they're not home?
• The secret relationship of sisters. What goes on in Erin's house?
• Mary relates one story about a student who felt her boundaries were invaded.
• The competition between Mary and Erin continues as we compare student lock box scenarios. #whowouldwin

Links: Line App Episode 38: Masterhost Tatiana Robertson Episode 17: Your Student Arrival Guide with a Homework Assignment Episode 8: Building Your Network of People in the World with Veteran Host Parent Mel Kilpatrick

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At one point or another, whether you as the host knows it or not, your student will get homesick. Sometimes it'll show through their emotions or difference in actions. Or sometimes, it only happens when they are hidden away in their rooms, when the lights are out trying to fall asleep. When do you intervene and what do you do to alleviate homesickness?

In this episode, we go through some of the stories we've had dealing with homesickness. Situations where students feel a longing or connection to someone they are missing back home. In small doses, this is healthy and shows signs of attachments to loved ones; and this can happen to you too when you are homesick for your past students! In larger cases, this is when we need to lean in and even ask for help. So listen in on how homesickness affects those that study abroad and how we approach these situations that can also create a tighter bond between you and your student.

Key Points From This Episode:

• Erin exudes positivity and Mary is uber practical. #potentialtriggerscomingyourway
• We coin a new phrase!
• Erin's update on how her family celebrated Halloween and the reverse homesickness they dealt with.
• Speaking of reverse homesickness… how did Erin's youngest daughter embarrass her recently? #thebookofquotes
• We give suggestions for how to connect with students who are struggling with homesickness.
• Mary reads a message from one of Masterhost mom Tatiana Robertson's students who struggled with homesickness.
• We chat about the signs of homesickness. #leanin
• The importance of looping in your homestay support system. #loopin
• Comfort food from our kitchens when our students are struggling with homesickness.

Links: Erin's Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies Recipe Episode 38: Masterhost Tatiana Robertson

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So what defines a short term student and a long term student? Mary defined a short term student as being anywhere less than 6 months, but after she said that (and even after we finished recording this episode), we were still debating what differentiated a long term student from a short term student. Any way you look at it, hosting short term students and long term students can be very different experiences. In this episode, Mary and Erin go toe to toe on the pros and cons of hosting long term students versus short term students.

Have you hosted both? What's your take on this battle? Let us know why you choose longer or shorter stay students. Email us at [email protected] or drop us a comment on Instagram!

Key Points From This Episode:

• Why does Mary mock Erin?
• Bonjour France!
• Erin assumes the battle position as we go toe to toe on the pros and cons of hosting #longtermvs.shortterm students. #wearesocompetitive
• How do you know when to take a break? We talk about the times we've hit the pause button on hosting students.
• Who ended up winning the battle? #doyouwanttohugitout

Links: Episode 39: featuring Erin in a suitcase Episode 11: featuring the doggy beds

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In today's episode, Erin had work to do, so Mary got to chat with Jennifer Longworth from Lexington, Kentucky. A new host parent who's only hosted a total of 3 times for very short periods and all from Japan. We talk through what it's like to be a very new host and what were some of the most surprising aspects of hosting. And it wouldn't be right to talk to our fellow neighbours to the south without pointing out a couple of differences from our countries, like hockey for us and southern food for her.

Our family has worked with the Lexington Sister Cities program to host a high school student and adult delegate from Japan. We also hosted a college student from Japan through another program. We've hosted a total of 3 times. Each visit was a week or less. My daughter takes Japanese at school and has been able to visit Japan twice! It's only been over the past few years that we've been involved.

Key Points From This Episode:

• Jennifer talks about how she came to host. #wecareabouthorses
• Gifts as an ice breaker. What do you give?
• First day rituals when hosting.
• Connecting through food.
• Communicating through language barriers.
• Before hosting, Jennifer touches on her expectations of the challenges she'd face… and if they ever came to be.
• Jennifer and Mary chat about culture shock.
• Jennifer shares part of her daughter's experience in Japan.
• Jennifer reminisces about her most memorable experiences hosting.
• Mary and Jennifer bond over hockey.
• Which one of Jennifer's favourite dishes to serve international students convinced Mary that she needs to come stay for a visit?

Links: Lexington Sister Cities Shinhidaka, Hokkaido Japanese American Society of Kentucky Cracker Barrel Restaurant Google Translate

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How do you meal prep for your students? What do you incorporate into your meal plans for them? Food is a big factor when it comes to homestay experiences. Not only the culture of different foods to eat and explore, but also how we eat and when.

In today's episode, we talk about navigating all the meals of the day including snacks and dessert. We also touch on preventing food waste and figuring out what your students like or don't like to eat. Hopefully, this episode won't make you hungry, but if it does, you can make that hummus recipe Mary loves and snack on that; just like we did while we recorded this episode. You can find the link in our show notes. Let us know if you try it!

Key Points From This Episode:

• How did Mary make Erin happy?
• And then Erin reciprocates… by making Mary feel uncomfortable. #shesblushing
• We discuss our personal values around food and hosting.
• What meal did Erin skip? Mary says it's the most important one!
• Mary lets us in on her scheme.
• Erin talks about weekday mornings at her house. #everybodywantssomethingdifferent
• We discuss our weekend routines.
• Mary shares a situation she found frustrating with a student around food.
• Erin and Mary's tips for school lunches.
• What meal do Erin's students have to eat in secret? #dontletthechildrensee #waittilthechildrenareinbed
• Erin has an "aha!" moment about Mary & Jon's relationship.
• Erin teases Mary. #plantobespontaneous
• Mary worries about what Erin is going to eat tonight.
• We chat about going to a restaurant as a family. Who pays?
• Special events… do you bring your student?
• Cooking together with students.

Links: Mary's hummus recipe Episode 27: Homestay Family Mindset with Jodi Johl

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One of the major challenges of hosting international students is to navigate the language barrier. Communication is key to any relationship, so how do you have the confidence to speak your mind when your student doesn't speak your language? At times you need to be fearless and in today's episode we chat with Heather Thompson who shares this grit with a side of humour.

Heather and her family of four has hosted 13 students over 5 years. She discusses her experience as an international student when she was young, being a host to students, and even being hosted by a former student in Belgium. Hear what she and her family learned while hosting and how these experiences created a lot of laughter in their lives.

Key Points From This Episode:

• Heather tells us about her hosting history and her own travel adventures. #talkingoveradictionary
• Heather chats about her expectations on the level of English students will have when they arrive.
• We talk about communication and comprehension... and the challenge with "yes" and "no" answers. #youdontunderstandanythingijustsaid
• Heather shares about a time there was a miscommunication with a student.
• We talk about communicating with students pre-arrival.
• Filling out forms for students. #mamabearsontheothersideoftheworld
• What part of hosting do you find the most challenging? Heather wasn't expecting this attack on her senses.
• Heather reminisces on some of her most memorable moments hosting students.
• Heather shares her experience being hosted by a former student in Belgium.
• Mary talks about her plans for visiting students in Japan.
• Will Heather send her kids on an exchange in the future?
• Heather's tips to bond with students.
• Heather instructs Erin on how to make an ice cream cake.
• Erin gives a rice intervention update. What topping has her Japanese student introduced?
• Mary, her bubble and how it applies to her plate.
• Heather chats about her attempts to cook versions of her student's favourite dishes.

Links: Chicoutimi, Quebec Goldstream Park Salmon Run Google Maps Google Translate Furikake

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Culture shock can come in many different forms, not just language for international students. From food, to hygiene, and even the way people dress. It's not about what each culture is doing right or wrong, but about how things are done and are acceptable in different countries. Culture shock can be entertaining and fascinating to new students at first, but then it could also lead to confusion, feeling anxious, overwhelmed, and disoriented, which could induce homesickness. So what is this cycle and what signs are we looking for?

In today's episode, we go through the 10 steps of culture shock and how it's all part of being a homestay host to international students studying abroad.

Key Points From This Episode:

• Erin gives an update on how her students are settling into her family.
• We dive into the 10 steps of Culture Shock and the roller coaster of emotions it can bring.
• Erin speaks about some of the student situations/experiences in her home.
• Mary shares some of the specific culture shocks her students have struggled with.
• Erin chats about what her house looks like and sounds like with her girls.

• #mamabear
• We discuss what happens when long-term students go home to visit family during school breaks. #resettingthecycle
• Pre-returns ups and downs.

• Erin's update on a possible student visit… just in time for Christmas.
• In a surprising twist, what did Erin get Mary to promise to try? It's a reverse culture shock!

Links: Our conversation with Jennifer Wilson from the Canada Homestay Network

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