The Hope Over Coffee Podcast

Equipping a man of God. What does that look like in today's culture? What boundaries do you have set in place while you are trying to raise your children? Do you have a mindset of equipping your kids with tools, wisdom, and knowledge to handle the unknown? Will you have enough grace, compassion, and foresight to lead your kids through their bad decisions? We live in a culture of relentless pursuit of sex and porn, and it is highly likely that your children will be exposed to porn by age eight. What does that mean for you? What does that mean for you kids? Being exposed to things like porn at an early age makes them susceptible to a lifestyle that revolves around pursuing porn. Possibly an addiction to it. So how do you handle that, a believer? Are you free from addiction to it? Can you lead your family with pure intention in your life? Are you able to talk about this with the community? Do you have any support if you have questions or struggles related to porn for you or your family? We must be intentional with the legacy we are leaving behind. We must equip a man of God that is coming up next. What are you doing to reach that goal?

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Do you know who you are? What is your identity wrapped up in? Could it be where you spend your time, energy, and money? I know that when I was heavy in my addiction there was a lot of effort put to satisfy that addiction. Now that I have found freedom from that addiction I spend a lot of effort to not satisfy that addiction. I'm spending my time, energy, and money on things that bring me closer in alignment with being Christ-like. Do I get it perfect all the time? Absolutely not! But I know there is more to life than getting the next fix! The is more than me trying to fill what I thought was the greatest need in my life, which was much self. Now, I want to challenge believers in their spiritual walk. I want to challenge their assumptions about how they pursue Christ. We are sleepwalking through life and it will probably take a "rock bottom" experience to wake us up. We have generations at stake, and we can only think about that next fix. That "I gotta get comfortable because this life is uncomfortable, and I can't take it." What are we doing? What will it take to get you to live in the uncomfortable, to live in a space where we can't stay passive and allow our families to take 3rd place in our lives? 

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Stop Start Continue. The new season of The Hope Over Coffee Podcast is here! I took a few weeks off and got the opportunity to upgrade some of the Hope Over Coffee equipment. In other words, I got a new computer… So with that, I now have the ability to produce a video for the pods. I am super nervous about it. I don't think it's any different than putting out audio-only other than everyone can see me! All my insecurities are on display. But I think this is a good way to get the message of hope out there. Maybe that is why it scares me the most. It may actually get seen by people, and I could be misunderstood. But I'm gonna keep pressing on. Fight the good fight and talk about what I know. With that, in this week's episode, I tell more of my story and try to share my heart with everyone. I know there are guys out there who don't want to be stuck in the cycle of porn addiction. I want them to know they are not alone. I was there, I have freedom now, and I still live a life where my flesh wants what it wants, and I must deny myself to serve Jesus. Most days are just like any other. Some days it's harder. The rest are relatively easy in the sense of keeping my boundary of porn. I also want guys to know that in the freedom I found, intimacy has grown exponentially with my wife. You can have that too. We have to put in the work. So let's stop what we were doing, start doing the work it takes to pursue Christ and continue to the end. Run the race.

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Finding perspective! Are we truly concerned with those around us? This week I brought Kristen and Chance to the kitchen table to talk about living as a teenage believers in our current culture. Trying to wrap my thoughts around what it is like for a non-believer to survive in our current state without Jesus. I'm trying to figure out what they do. Our society and climate in America are completely wrapped up in gender and sexuality. And if you don't have Jesus in your life to over a life that is based on sex, what do you do? As we drift further and further away from the morality that God has for us and the standards He calls us to, the next generation will be further from God. I challenged Kristen and Chance to ask what they are doing to help those around them. More specifically, those who claim to believe in Jesus Christ and yet no fruit of the Holy Spirit is displayed in their lives. We cannot know what is in another person's heart, but we can inspect their actions. And what are we doing if they don't align with what Jesus calls us to in the Bible? And ask the question of what influences your walk with Christ. What types of music are you finding your perspective in? Does the music you listen to bring you to a vulgar place or lift you up, or can it be neither? Is it possible to just listen to any music you want as a believer? Come join us as we are finding perspective in the journey of life.

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The incomplete guide to foundational repair is based on the idea that Christ is the firm foundation we build upon and that what we are building is an imitation of Christ. In this episode, we tap into the question of whom you follow. Are you putting in the work to discipline your body to follow Christ? And 1 Corinthians 11:1, Paul tells us to be imitators of him just as he is an imitator of Christ, which caused me to beg the question, whom am I following in my walk of Christ? Is there anyone that I want to imitate that is following Christ? Also, I ask who is following me. We are all being watched in our daily walk; our kids, friends, and family catch our actions. So do they line up with what Christ tells us to do? Are you disciplining your body the way an athlete disciplines theirs to be a winner? Are you trying to figure out what spiritual disciplines are lacking in your life, like reading the word, praying, solitude, fellowship, memorizing scripture, or journaling? Are you putting in every effort to remain in Christ as he is remaining in you? He is the vine, and we are the branches, and we can do nothing apart from him. But what are you staying in? Are you remaining in sin? Are you remaining in the things of this world or Christ? As believers, if we have the opportunity to discipline our bodies and choose not to, why are we choosing not to? What example does that leave for nonbelievers to see? so this week, we need to examine what it means to pick up our cross and follow Jesus. What does it mean to crucify our flesh and do the will of the Father? We have to do whatever it takes to repair the foundational cracks we have in our building on the solid foundation of Christ!

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Verses

Imitate me, as I also imitate Christ. Christian Standard Bible (Nashville, TN: Holman Bible Publishers, 2020), 1 Co 11:1.

 In the same way, encourage the young men to be self-controlled 7 in everything. Make yourself an example of good works with integrity and dignity in your teaching. Christian Standard Bible (Nashville, TN: Holman Bible Publishers, 2020), Tt 2:6–7.

4 Remain in me, and I in you. Just as a branch is unable to produce fruit by itself unless it remains on the vine, neither can you unless you remain in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. The one who remains in me and I in him produces much fruit, because you can do nothing without me. Christian Standard Bible (Nashville, TN: Holman Bible Publishers, 2020), Jn 15:4–5.

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Foundational Crack. We know that Jesus is the firm foundation we all need to build our lives on. But are we actually doing it? Or do we build a life on a counterfeit foundation? A foundation that does not lead to anything worthwhile in the vision you have for your family. Do you even have a vision for yourself, your family, your co-workers, or anyone around you? Does it have that person looking more like Jesus today than yesterday? How are you striving to reach that vision? Your actions will only allow you to live inside your belief system. So does your belief system say about your foundation? Does the Holy Spirit and your community work to keep your foundation from cracking? Or do you have a foundational crack? Is the weight of everyday life on your counterfeit foundation making you crumble? Can you even see what is good in your life to build on? Or are your eyes closed while your sleepwalking through your spiritual life? We need to wake up and be the church! We need to live our life as Christ's followers if we claim Christ is the Lord of our life. If Christ is our Lord, we must live out a life that reflects our foundation built on Him. Put in the work to dig out what is in the way. Allow Christ to change your heart and mind. 

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Pause. When was the last time you stopped and took stock of what was happening in your life? I just wanted to stop and do a heart check in this episode. I must take a breath and ask, have I been pursuing my kingdom with The Hope Over Coffee Podcast? I have to take a step back and take the bigger picture of Hope Over Coffee and my role in it. I have to navigate the tension between the calling God has called me to and my fleshy pride and selfishness. Now and then, we need to stop and look at the bigger picture. We must seek the wise counsel of those around us and over us. I can get so wrapped up in the number of downloads the podcast can get that and quickly lose sight of what I am here for. To be in complete submission to what Christ has called me to. To be in this season of being an encouragement to men. To let others know there is freedom out there. We are not bound and stuck in the sin that so easily entangles us. We can get out of that ditch we are stuck in, and it takes Christ to do it. I have also been working through this message that God has given me. One that we are holding on to so many things in our hearts. We have hurts, trauma, and hang-ups that get shoved down in our hearts. We then pile the soil on top of it and pack it down tight. Our hearts are getting stiff and compacted tight. We must go to work, dig these things up, and make room for Christ. When we make the room, He can do the work of turning our hearts back to flesh. We can overcome our pains and genuinely know the freedom of following Christ. 

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The one thing you can't live without! What is it? Is it sex, drugs, alcohol, or porn? Does that make these things your greatest need to survive? What about not doing these things? Is that your greatest need? To be sober with whatever your addiction is? Is your greatest need to stop watching porn, to not have our focus entirely on having sex, or to be the most influential person you know. Is your goal each week just to make it to the weekend so you can get drunk and forget your worries? Our greatest need is Jesus, and sobriety is too small a goal. We must walk by the Spirit and do so in the community of other men! Walking in Spirit is also walking in accountability. I must have intimate relationships that know me, and I know them. This is how we love and are sharpened. We come out of our bondage, addiction, and compulsions through walking by the Spirit. We live a Spirit-controlled self that brings us to bring us closer to Jesus. We didn't become addicted overnight, it will take time to get out of it. Trust God in the journey of being Christlike. 

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Verses Mentioned: 

Galatians 5:16

So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. 

Tyndale House Publishers, Holy Bible: New Living Translation (Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, 2015), Ga 5:16.

Romans 8:6

So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.

Tyndale House Publishers, Holy Bible: New Living Translation (Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, 2015), Ro 8:6.

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Who are you protecting? Are you living a life of self-protection? Are you hiding a secret life? Do you hear the lies "If someone really knew me, they wouldn't love me!" Self-protection builds walls that keep people out and keep you in! God has created us to be known and know. Not only God but others. Will you keep denying God's intention and purpose for your life by continuing to live a life of self-protection? Have you found a safe community? Do you even know what to look for in a safe person? You need safe people and intimate relationships in your life. God has created us to have these things because we are created in His image. So what are you not talking about, what are you not getting out, and what are you going to do to stop living a life of self-protection?

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Verses Mentioned: 

Psalm 101:4

I will reject perverse ideas and stay away from every evil. 

Tyndale House Publishers, Holy Bible: New Living Translation (Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, 2015), Ps 101:4.

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Do you know why you do the things you do? Do you go to bible study, small groups, and conferences to prepare yourself for the doom and gloom of life? Are you just trying to feel better by filling your life with good things, all the while holding your sin close to your chest? Deep down you are not ready to let go of the earthly things that bring you comfort. You want the "best" of both worlds. You want to be the "King" of your own life and have all the blessings of the "King of Kings." You have to find your patterns of sin and eradicate them in your life. How can you let go of your kingship if your pattern keeps putting you back on the throne of your life? You have to surrender it to the Lord. In that surrender, you are going to find your purpose and calling in your life. You are going to figure out what it is costing you to keep chasing these patterns. Do you want to pass on a legacy of sin or righteousness? In this free gift of grace and salvation, we do have a part to play. We have lived a life worthy of our calling and pursue Christ with a full heart! We cannot keep going back to the things of dead life. So what is God telling you, and what are you going to do about it?

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Verses Mentioned: 

James 1:19-27

19 Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. 20 Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires. 21 So get rid of all the filth and evil in your lives, and humbly accept the word God has planted in your hearts, for it has the power to save your souls. 22 But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves. 23 For if you listen to the word and don’t obey, it is like glancing at your face in a mirror. 24 You see yourself, walk away, and forget what you look like. 25 But if you look carefully into the perfect law that sets you free, and if you do what it says and don’t forget what you heard, then God will bless you for doing it. 26 If you claim to be religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless. 27 Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you. 

1 John 1:9

9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.

James 5:16

16 Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. 

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