What is the "Hard Case" for self-care?  Why do we so often, when helping others, try to get to offering solutions instead of just being there to honour and validate another person's reality.  Sometimes the first step in the change process is just taking time to notice.  

Quote for the year: "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived." -- Henry David Thoreau

Showcase Resource: 

1) The International Self-Care Foundation - Visit this site for a definition of self-care and learn about the 7 Pillars of Self-Care.  Click here to access the site - http://isf-foundation.us/

Related Episodes: 

1) Episode 58 - Self-Care Self Assessment - Episode 58 - Self-Care Self-Assessments & Inter-Being Scaffolding | The Hopeful Humanist Cafe

A Parting Salutations: 

Thank-you for joining me for another meeting of the minds. As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous.

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -

In this episode, I invite the listener to join me as I provide a summary account of a virtual, two-day training workshop that I attended about a therapeutic counselling modality called, "Acceptance and Commitment Therapy" - otherwise known as ACT.  The total listening experience includes six audio segments. Each of the two days of training includes an introduction to the day and two summary modules about the material covered.  In each module, I provide a concise sharing about a concept central to ACT (i.e. functional contextualism, relational frame therapy, etc.).  Between each module, you will "notice" (the act of mindfully noticing is a big deal to ACT) a very short "typewriting" sound prompt, which is an invitation for the listener to just take a break (actually "pause" the episode) and reflect upon the relevance of the ideas shared to my ongoing discussions about self-coaching and self-care.  Hopefully, during the "paused" moments, one might think how the material relates to one's ideas about what constitutes self-care and how one might expand one's thinking about self-care. 

Modules: 

1) Module One: In this module, I talk about "functional contextualism," which is the underlying philosophical foundation of ACT.  I relate the concept to the idea of the self. I suggest a better frame for the idea of a dynamic self that engages in self-care might be this thing called, "Inter-being wellness."  Want to learn more about functional contextualism, click here - What is functional contextualism? - YouTube

2) Module Two: In this module, I briefly talk about "relational frame theory," which is a theory that can work in conjunction with ACT.  I invite the listener to explore one's idea of what self-care is and how one might expand upon already internalized ideas of self-care.  Is self-care an indulgence? A luxury? What activities constitute self-care? Soaking in a hot tub? Setting a boundary? Having a hard conversation? Making an apology?  Here is a video if you are interested in learning more about RFT - Relational Frame Theory (RFT) From your ACT Auntie - YouTube

3) Module Three: In this module, we explored the benefits of finding or creating a metaphor for one's life.  Metaphors can orient a person and direct a person. Metaphors capture themes that reveal values and can remind us about what is meaningful during difficult moments.  What life metaphor is operating in your life? Here are some ACT metaphors -

The Stageshow Metaphor - YouTube

Passengers on the Bus - YouTube

Monsters on a Boat - YouTube

4) Module Four: This module is a wrap-up discussion about the ultimate goal of ACT -- to build and nurture "psychological flexibility" in one's life.  There is also acknowledgement that life is hard and that sometimes we get stuck.  During these times, we need to be gentle with ourselves and just keep on practicing skills we already know or open up to learning and trying some new ones.  Watch the following Steven Hayes' Ted Talk to learn more about psychological flexibility - Psychological flexibility: How love turns pain into purpose | Steven Hayes | TEDxUniversityofNevada - YouTube

Showcase Resource: 

1) The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living (Audible Audio Edition): Russ Harris, Russ Harris, Shambhala Publications: Amazon.ca: Books

2) The following blog post was written after I attended the introductory workshop for ACT way over a year ago.  In it, I talk about the centrality of noticing to the mindfulness practices connected to ACT.  Additionally, I explore what I believe are four core competencies for the practice of self-care. There is also a link for Russ Harris' ACT webpage where one can access a lot of free material related to different ACT tools and strategies.  https://soundcarelifecoaching.com/online-resources-1/f/making-acceptance-commitment-therapy-relevant-to-life-coaching

A Parting Salutations:

Thank-you for joining me for another meeting of the minds. As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous.

Supporting the Café: 

Please help keep the conversation at Hopeful Humanist Café going. Check out my support page at Soundcarelifecoaching.com by clicking here - https://soundcarelifecoaching.com/support-the-hh-caf%C3%A9

Steve, The Hopeful Humanist

Peace, take care, be well and share!

This episode is simply a short question. It is an invitation to put one's "self" under the metaphorical microscope.  This can be a hard thing to do, but it is essential for living a deliberate and mindful life.  

I anticipate that I will follow-up this question with a future episode where I intend to debrief and unpack the question in order to explore the implications it has in our lives as it points to a responsibility to be careful about the words we use.  We shape our lives and our relationships with language.  Should there be a maxim that guides us in this respect?   

For now, however, I find myself just wanting to sit in the question and allow it to percolate.  

A Parting Salutations:

Thank-you for joining me for another meeting of the minds. As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous.

Supporting the Café: 

Please help keep the conversation at Hopeful Humanist Café going. Check out my support page at Soundcarelifecoaching.com by clicking here - https://soundcarelifecoaching.com/support-the-hh-caf%C3%A9

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -

In this very brief episode of the Hopeful Humanist Café, I will showcase what I will simultaneously call a "Sound-Story" & "Audio-Sound-Blot."  The episode is simply a listening experience.  One might just sit back and get comfortable or grab one's journal and open up to the possibility of an imaginative outpouring.   

As a "Sound-Story," the invitation is simply to listen to the collection of sounds so one can string together a story about what is happening.  I see it as a possible prompt for one's daily journaling exercise.  Using your imagination, what story do the sounds tell you?  Listen and write.  

As an "Audio-Sound Blot," the invitation is simply to quiet one's monkey mind, breath, be and just "notice." Listen and ground.  Use your breath to calm both your body and your inner world.  

The track is 5 minutes and 39 seconds long.  It is created from 13 different sounds.  Can you identify them all?  It was a lot of fun to make.  My youngest son, Blazing Phoenix, who is definitely not a morning person, has found it useful in helping him get up in the morning.  He will migrate from his comfortable bed to the living room couch.  In the dimly lit room, he will cuddle up in his favourite blanket, listen to the track, and challenge himself to gear up for the start of his day by the time the track runs through.  It has become a part of our morning routine.  If it works, use it, right!  

Showcase Resource: 

1) If you want to get in the sandbox and see what you might create as an original beat or something like a "Sounds-Story"/"Audio-Sound-Blot," check-out Soundtrap from Spotify by clicking here: https://www.soundtrap.com/

I use the free version, but paid upgrades are possible.  

A Parting Salutations:

Thank-you for joining me for another meeting of the minds. As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous.

If you think you might benefit from working with a Self-Care Life Coach, please visit my website at Soundcarelifecoaching - Self-Care - Kitchener, Ontario to learn more.  You can start the process by emailing me at [email protected]. 

Supporting the Café: 

Please help keep the conversation at Hopeful Humanist Café going. Check out my support page at Soundcarelifecoaching.com by clicking here - https://soundcarelifecoaching.com/support-the-hh-caf%C3%A9

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -

Welcome to another spontaneous & unedited blithering at The Hopeful Humanist Café.  

When you do not got the motivation to tackle the Mount Everest challenges on your metaphorical life plate, tackle the small stuff. The small stuff can create momentum. For me that was focusing on the backyard shed.  Unexpectedly, while getting some small checkmarks, I discovered that perspective is a big deal.  

The episode ends with a beat I created for a previous episode called, "Outdoor Playfulness."  It just seemed apropos.

Episode Question: What animal do you think of when you think of the words, "adaptable," "persistent," and "creative?"

T-shirt Idea: "Just Painting Bricks!" A way of describing what my day was like.  The act of painting bricks seems monotonous enough, but when everything is done, then you have the "WOW FACTOR!"  Keep painting them brick.

Quote for the Episode: "Learn to see things from different perspectives. Never limit yourself to just one point of view." ---- Unknown

Threads to connect in the discussion:

1) Creating momentum

2) Gaining perspective

3) Getting over the hindrances of life (from a Buddhist Perspective) - taken from "Awakening the Buddha Within," by Lama Surya Das

1. Craving

Showcase Resources:

1) What is the lifespan of the squirrel? Why do squirrels run in a zig-zag fashion?  Here are a couple links to learn more about squirrels: 

20 Awesome Facts About Squirrels - Wildlife Informer

About Squirrel - Informative Website For Squirrel Lover

Squirrel - Wikipedia

2) What is the raccoons most important sense? What is the average height of a raccoon? Here are a couple of links to learn more about raccoons:

Raccoon Web Site Links (raccoonworld.com)

Raccoon - Wikipedia

Fact Check: I just wanted to note in this episode, I stated that cats generally do not venture more than 5 blocks from their homes.  This information was collected from one source.  After doing a google search, it appears that might not be the case. What I can say, however, in terms of my personal experience, our Nala seldom goes more than 5 houses away from our house and that she was found within a distance of five houses away as opposed to five blocks away.  

Special Thanks:

I would like to share a special thanks with Sasa and Mylene who "one the spot" answered a free-association prompt that I used to introduce this episode.  My interaction with Mylene was especially interesting as it captured how often miscommunications unfold in simple one-to-one interactions.  You will have to listen to the end of the episode to listen to the exchange.  It demonstrates that communication is an ongoing skill to be developed.  

A Parting Salutations:

Thank-you for joining me for another meeting of the minds. As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous.

If you think you might benefit from working with a Self-Care Life Coach, please visit my website at Soundcarelifecoaching - Self-Care - Kitchener, Ontario to learn more.  You can start the process by emailing me at [email protected]. 

Supporting the Café: 

Please help keep the conversation at Hopeful Humanist Café going. Check out my support page at Soundcarelifecoaching.com by clicking here - https://soundcarelifecoaching.com/support-the-hh-caf%C3%A9

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -

This episode is from a Substack article I prepared for my news letter, "Hopeful Humanist Cafe Newsletter." The article is called, "What will you do today."  I really enjoyed making the episode and wanted to include it into the library of episodes available on "The Hopeful Humanist Cafe" podcast.  

Here is the link for the article: What will you do today? - by Steve the hopeful humanist (substack.com)

Something to do today - Make a list of the things you are grateful for ...

Quote: "Take vacations. As many as you can. You can always make money. You can’t always make memories." - Unknown

T-shirt Idea: Create an eternal moment

A Parting Salutations:

Thank-you for joining us for another meeting of the minds. As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous.

If you think you might benefit from working with a Self-Care Life Coach, please visit my website at Soundcarelifecoaching - Self-Care - Kitchener, Ontario to learn more.  You can start the process by emailing me at [email protected]. 

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -

Welcome to The Hopeful Humanist Café.  In episode 71, I am joined by Captain Jack and Danielson for an organic discussion and debrief about an episode from "The Psychology Podcast" with Scott Barry Kaufman. The specific episode we talked about is called, "How William James Can Save Your Life," with special guest John Kaag, who is an Existential Philosopher (see link below).  I framed the debrief with the following orienting question, "As we all work with youth, I work with teen youth and you both work with youth stepping into young adulthood, I would like to paint this picture. We are approached by a young wounded, seeking soul who asks the privileged question, 'Is life worth living and how can philosophy pragmatically save my life?'"  What says we?  

In terms of this episode, peripatetic more pragmatically describes the "walk and talk" flavour/nature of my time spent with Captain Jack and Danielson, two spiritual brothers, while making this episode.  During these "walk and talk" moments, one has the sense of being part of a community; to borrow a Buddhist term, it is as if one is part of what I would like to creatively call my "philosophical sangha."  Disclaimer: Humbly, we are just a "few ones blithering."  

Quote of the Day - "In any weather, at any hour of the day or night, I have been anxious to improve the nick of time, and notch it on my stick too; to stand on the meeting of two eternities, the past and the future, which is precisely the present moment; to toe that line."  -- Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862) American Author

T-shirt Idea: We are all living in a nick of time; life is but a nick in time ...

Showcase Resource:

1) "The Psychology Podcast," by Barry Scott Kaufman. The name of the podcast says it all.  Barry is a Humanist Psychologist who has found a mentor in Abraham H. Maslow.  Visit the following webpage to learn more about Barry's updated "Sailboat" metaphor for Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs - Sailboat Metaphor - Scott Barry Kaufman .

2) Here are three episodes of "The Psychology Podcast" worth listening to:

a) John Kaag || How William James Can Save Your Life May 26, 2022

John Kaag || How William James Can Save Your Life - Scott Barry Kaufman

b) Alexi Robichaux || The Future of Coaching June 30, 2022

Alexi Robichaux || The Future of Coaching - Scott Barry Kaufman

c) Daniel Schmachtenberger || Towards a Radical Cultural Enlightenment February 24, 2022

Daniel Schmachtenberger || Towards a Radical Cultural Enlightenment - Scott Barry Kaufman

Related Hopeful Humanist Episode(s):

1) Episode 68 - Life Coaching Questions Answered by Sarah Crawte (hopefulhumanistcafe.com)

2) Episode 18 - Yearning to Yearn, a Gen Z GIG-a-lo, and On Being Radical (hopefulhumanistcafe.com)

A Parting Salutations:

A special thank-you goes out to Captain Jack and Danielson! It was fun and I am already looking forward to our next blithering session.  

Thank-you for joining us for another meeting of the minds. As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous.

If you think you might benefit from working with a Self-Care Life Coach, please visit my website at Soundcarelifecoaching - Self-Care - Kitchener, Ontario to learn more.  You can start the process by emailing me at [email protected]. 

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -

"Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought

and the thought has found words."

- Robert Frost

Episode 70 with Danielson has finally arrived. Another unedited, one take blithering session with "Just Two Ones."  As indicated in the "Antidote Primer for upcoming Episode," Danielson and I will attempt to interpret and relate to six selected Emily Dickinson poems.  The poems discussed include: 

It is my hope you have had a chance to read and recite out loud the poems before listening to the episode.  I hope you enjoy the conversation ...

Resources: 

1) Please revisit the "Antidote Primer for Upcoming Episode" for complete resource list.

2) In terms of some Canadian poets worth exploring, you might try collections by Al Purdy, John Newlove, Erin Moure and Roo Borson.  

A Parting Salutations:

A special thank-you goes out to Danielson! I am already looking forward to our next blithering session.  

Thank-you for joining me for another meeting of the minds. Here I would like to  leave you with the invitation to think about the benefits of bringing a little more poetry into your life.  Express yourself! As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous. 

If you think you might benefit from working with a Self-Care Life Coach, please visit my website at Soundcarelifecoaching - Self-Care - Kitchener, Ontario to learn more.  You can start the process by emailing me at [email protected]. 

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -

Where do thoughts come from?  In episode 69, we turn to a poem from the American Poet Emily Elizabeth Dickinson (Dec. 10, 1830 to May 15, 1886) where she shares her experience of an arising thought.  It is a beautiful poem. The poem provides one with the opportunity to become aware of one's thinking mind and it's relationship to one's observing mind.  As some are more visual learners than others, here is her untitled creation: 

A thought went up my mind to-day

That I have had before,

But did not finish,–some way back,

I could not fix the year,

Nor where it went, nor why it came

The second time to me, Nor definitely what it was,

Have I the art to say.

But somewhere in my soul, I know

I’ve met the thing before;

It just reminded me–‘t was all–

And came my way no more.

-Emily Dickinson

At the end of the episode, I have included some bonus material. Something extra from Danielson, a regular Hopeful Humanist Café guest, and the first beat I have ever created called, "Outdoor Playfulness."  Both "sharings" utilized free digital audio tools from the online music platform called, "Soundtrap."  I hope you enjoy the listening experience. 

Resources:

1) Want to create a background musical ambience for your outpourings of poetry, check out this resource: https://www.soundtrap.com/

2) Interested in understanding more about the "Default Mode Network?" Check-out this video:(157) Autopilot Mode, the Brain and Mindfulness (The Default Mode Network) #LewisPsychology - YouTube

3) Need strategies to stand up to intrusive thoughts, check out this book by Russ Harris called, "The Happiness Trap."  Find it at your local library or possibly get a free audio copy via Amazon by clicking here: The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living (Audible Audio Edition): Russ Harris, Russ Harris, Shambhala Publications: Amazon.ca: Books . This book in itself, is another episode waiting for the making.  

4) Take a trip to your local library to pick up a book of poems by Emily Dickinson.  If you want to own your own copy, you can click this Amazon link: The Essential Emily Dickinson : Dickinson, Emily: Books - Amazon

Related Episodes:

1) Episode 57 - BOOMPF …”It’s Create a Word Day!” (hopefulhumanistcafe.com)

2) Episode 59 - ”Audio Sound Blot” - Lot#1 Growing Old & Sardines (hopefulhumanistcafe.com)

- both episodes are all about leaning into creative play ... I especially enjoyed the audio sound blot creation and imagine more might come now that I discovered Soundtrap.  Is it time to unleash your creative spirit?  When we do creative things, it seems as it fun is not too far away!  

A Parting Salutations:

Thank-you for joining me for another meeting of the mind. Here I would like to  leave you with the invitation to think about the benefits of bringing a little more poetry into your life.  Express yourself! As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous. 

If you think you might benefit from working with a Self-Care Life Coach, please visit my website at Soundcarelifecoaching - Self-Care - Kitchener, Ontario to learn more.  You can start the process by emailing me at [email protected]. 

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -

In episode 68, I am joined by Life Coach Sarah Crawte who talks about what life coaching is and is not, her journey toward life coaching, and the benefits of connecting with a life coach.  

Maintaining your health is often challenging and, at times, requires reaching out for help. During difficult times, help can be accessed from communities of care that include family, friends, colleagues, spiritual mentors, self-help communities, doctors, nurses, pharmacists, therapists, massage therapists, chiropractors, and/or a life coach . These communities provide the necessary scaffolding to help you focus your priorities, establish balance, and develop your vital sense of self. By developing your sense of self, you can become more aware of your needs, beliefs, values, intentions, and interests. With expanded self-awareness, you can then buffer yourself from life’s inevitable challenges, while also building resilience. (Excerpt taken from my website Soundcare Life Coaching).

An apology: When recording this episode, I was experimenting with a new headset and it is quite apparent I should have kept with my usual  habit of using my lapel microphone.  As a consequence, the sound quality was compromised.  It is my hope the listen is still bearable and that the topic is interesting enough to encourage the listener to persevere until the end.  Lesson learned.  

Orienting Quote: "Life begins at the end of your comfort zone." Lifecoachinghub.com

Resources:

1) "Almost anyone can become a life coach. A hidden cameral investigation reveals why that's a problem." An article from CBC news that explores the importance of not confusing coaching for therapy and encourages coaches to stay in their lane.  While I definitely support the idea of trauma-informed life coaching, it is for the purpose of identifying those situations where it is appropriate to make a referral for those suffering from anxiety, depression and PTSD and a caution about practicing outside of one's scope of expertise.  To read the article, click here -Almost anyone can become a life coach. A hidden camera investigation reveals why that's a problem | CBC News. 

2) "Mental health coaches filling the gaps during pandemic." Another CBC article that focuses on the increased demand for life coaches as those in need of immediate mental health support are left stranded due to long therapy waitlists.  The Covid-19 pandemic has resulted in increased levels of anxiety, depression, substance use and loneliness.  Therapist are over-extended yet the need for help NOW requires a remedy.  To read this article, click here - Mental health coaches filling the gaps during pandemic | CBC News. 

A Parting Salutations:

Thank-you for joining me for a blithering tip-of-the-iceberg conversation about life coaching with Sarah.  As always, the conversation is ongoing and continuous.

If you think you might benefit from working with a Self-Care Life Coach, please visit my website at Soundcarelifecoaching - Self-Care - Kitchener, Ontario to learn more.  You can start the process by emailing me at [email protected]. 

Peace, take care, be well, and share

The Hopeful Humanist -