The Inner Dive

introduction to this story: followthepaint.substack.com/p/episode-8-three-turns-of-the-novel

gallery of selected art: esthersharp.com/gallery

video channel: youtube.com/@inksmudgestudio

Get full access to Follow the Paint at followthepaint.substack.com/subscribe

An audio log to mark the completion of my novella.

Visual version of this episode available at Ink Smudge Studio

Intro music: “Bright Waking Moon” by Ethan Sharp, full song and album available here

You can subscribe to my written field notes on Substack and find more of my work at esthersharp.com

Three Turns of the River available Fall 2025

Get full access to Follow the Paint at followthepaint.substack.com/subscribe

In this piece I share readings by and about Mary Oliver.

Mary is one of the portraits in my personal pantheon, available now as part of the Art-chetype Series in my shop.

The music at the beginning of this episode is Bright Waking Moon, written and composed by my brother, Ethan Sharp, and used with his permission. You can find the full song and buy the whole album (The Kith: A Lunar Calendar) inspired by my fantasy novel-in-progress here.

The music at the end of this episode is by cicada brood XIV, recorded in May 2025. All rights reserved to them.

Get full access to Follow the Paint at followthepaint.substack.com/subscribe

In this double dive, Emma and I swim through our usual wide range of waters, including the limiting effects of metrics, where our true resources are (accessible to all), and the medicine of basking in blessings (not just counting them). We also dissect my ongoing break from Instagram and how social media can affect our creative output and sense of self approval—AND how it doesn’t have to.

This call was recorded while I was sitting in my backyard and Emma was camped by a river thousands of miles away—hurray for technology! That said, you may notice a soundtrack of birdsong, cicadas, an occasional breeze, and the return of some dog ASMR.

Special guest appearances by hummingbirds.

Intro music from the “The Body, The Sound” written, performed and recorded by Emma Liles (all rights reserved to her)

Our writing on Substack:

FOLLOW THE PAINT by Esther Sharp

TRUE NATURE by Emma Liles

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit followthepaint.substack.com

The first double dive of this year was actually recorded last year—we trust it’s on wizard’s time, and is arriving precisely when it means to. Join us for what Emma calls, “An open-ended conversation on what it means to be a creator.”

Hey Tony! We’re toning here!

In this episode…

+ the one wrong thing

+ an economy of feeling tones

+ no gatekeepers, no gates

+ blessings of dissatisfaction

+ how we bring hierarchies with us

+ welcoming Gene Keys and the flies in our own eyes

+ vibrational families

+ allowing the mutation of the transmission

+ the inner plateau

+ what tone do we want to be toning?

+ a horse with no name (aka Instagram) and how it’s gotten us into and out of some deserts

Emma on Instagram (solpothecary) and Substack (True Nature)

Esther on Instagram (followthepaint), Substack (Follow the Paint), and her site

Podcast on Instagram (theinnerdive)

Intro song from “The Body, The Sound” written, performed and recorded by Emma Liles (all rights reserved to her)

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit followthepaint.substack.com

A solo dive into a preoccupation from my childhood turned disillusionment turned career calibration. (There’s also a cryptic writing update.)

The new intro music is from a song written and performed by Emma Liles—used with her very kind permission. (All rights reserved to her.)

@ theinnerdive

@ followthepaint

esthersharp.com

Get full access to Follow the Paint at followthepaint.substack.com/subscribe

Emma Liles (the birch to my doug fir) returns for our monthly double dive, and true to the impromptu pottery theme, we begin with blobby lumps and develop them into various useful or pretty pieces.

HIGHLIGHTS:

* the yinward turn

* we discover a new mutual interest that sparked the same insight

* I rave about a pottery show (and the crying featured on it)

* the orange hand towel aka the wisdom of the napkin

* feeding (or subconsciously dosing) ourselves the colors we crave

* Chiron in the realm of communication

* being the clay

* a dose of serenity (my unusual takeaway from the film “Titanic”)

* the resonance of basins, guitars, and truth

* sunrises and sunsets as energy packs

* “straight up whale time”

* integration of the material

* forest communication (the importance of diverse feedback)

* two kinds of silence

* “all strings resonance”

* Emma shares her pottery song!! (53:15)

* allowing the wheel to turn

* the lie of fear being wisdom or a safety feature

* detoxing from worry

* walking ourselves back from the extremities of our own psyches

* my Jenga tower analogy which “eventually breaks down” (pun not intended)

* finding the essence in different places

* the root of all suffering (two translations with the same core)

FOOTNOTES

Amongst other things, we reference the teachings of Abraham Hicks, Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg, and The Hidden Life of Trees by Peter Wohlleben

Also I misspoke regarding Chiron, which stays in a sign for 1-9 years—not as long as Pluto does.

Emma on Instagram: @solpothecary

Emma’s weekly publication: TRUE NATURE

Me (Esther) on Instagram: @followthepaint

My short story: THE JADE ROOM

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit followthepaint.substack.com

In this solo dive, I tell the back story of my longtime novel, including…

* finding my voice in a river

* quilting the pieces together in England

* “hard-won holiday attention”

* how I took a 3/4 win and made it into a loss

* how Now Me sees Past Me

* writing a life raft

* no one had crowned me

* how The French Dispatch (and Wes Anderson in general) sparked me to be myself

* “We let her do what she wants”

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit followthepaint.substack.com

In this episode I chat with my one-time schoolmate and longtime pal, the talented singer-songwriter Travis Shipley.

Amongst many other things, we talk about…

* what it’s like to pull songs from the void (and sometimes lose them back to it)

* moving on from younger eras of our work when our perspectives change

* the narratives we create about ourselves and then operate from

* the glee of improv comedy with people you know and love

* how he’s waking up to the stoke of being alive

* the river of joy and how you get there (HINT: you don’t have to earn it)

You can find Travis on Instagram @therealtravisshipley and listen to some of his solo back catalog here (My favorites from that lineup are The Fall, Carefully Care for Them, and the cover of Tainted Love)

You can learn more about me and my work on my web site and find me on Instagram/Facebook @ followthepaint (but more on Instagram tbh)

You can read my zine-style newsletter FOLLOW THE PAINT here and buy my slipstream short story THE JADE ROOM here

If you enjoy these conversations, please rate and review the podcast wherever you’re listening to it and/or share it directly with friends so other like-hearted folks can find it.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit followthepaint.substack.com

Imagine Hermione Granger had a devout Buddhist phase before diving whole-heartedly into herbology, and you might have a pretty good idea of my guest this week.

EMMA LILES is a writer, musician, herbalist, essence cocreator, devotee of wild nature, tent dweller, and forager who has learned to trust nature, the body, and her own ability to focus implicitly—this is what she loves to share with others, and I am honored to call her one of my dearest friends and most significant catalysts in my life.

In this episode, we get into MANY THINGS, including…

* Emma’s flowy, empowered approach to astrology (“it doesn’t have to mean anything!”) and how Mercury retrograde can just be like saying it’s raining…

* The “green wall”—what it is, and how it drops

* Emma’s experience being deeply immersed in and then moving on from a rigorous religious practice

* A brief special guest appearance from my partner <3

* Wish-fulfilling trees

* The creative power of focus

* The gospel of plantain

* Healing modalities as ways we might evolve our biology (not “fix” a problem)

* Unshaven women!!

* Emma describes the music she will be sharing through True Nature

* Rodney Mullen—the skateboarding mystic (“living the math”)

* Emma offers her beautiful take on the Age of Aquarius (sharing our uniqueness benefits each other!)

Wouldn’t you know this would be the first week where the show notes call for a reference list?

First and foremost…

* TRUE NATURE—Emma’s masterpiece-in-the-making, her weekly newsletter where she shares more of her self, experiences, and creations (music, essences, etc). Free and paid subscriptions available! Treat your mind and spirit to more of the Emma frequency!

* FOLLOW THE PAINT—my zine-style newsletter featuring my writing and art. New issues on alternate weeks from the podcast.

* THE JADE ROOM—my slipstream short story, now available as an eBook exclusively (for now) on Kindle.

Citing other sources, in the order they’re mentioned…

* Mary Oliver poem: “The Wild Geese” (cited in the episode and read during the intro)

* Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramahansa Yogananda

* The School of Evolutionary Herbalism

* Love Poems from God

* Plant Intelligence and the Imaginal Realm by Stephen Harrod Buhner (Emma references Buhner’s work several times—she doesn’t directly name this book, but I happen to know it’s one of her faves!)

* The Fourth Phase of Water by Gerald H. Pollack

* The Rodney Mullen interview I referenced

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit followthepaint.substack.com