The Joyful Mourning - A Podcast for Women Who Have Experienced Pregnancy or Infant Loss

Listen in as I spend time with Carolyn Keller as she shares with me about her daughter Bethany who had trisomy 13. This episode is full of so much wisdom -- Caroyn shares about her pregnancy journey with Bethany as well as her life in the NICU.

She talks about what it was like to receive a life-limiting diagnosis and how she navigated that news with her husband and her 3 living children. And then we talk about what it was like to say goodbye and navigate life after loss. Again, we talk about marriage and parenting and what her faith looked like during that time.

Carolyn gives so much wisdom in this episode as well as a ton of practical advice including her favorite resources and books for navigating a life-limiting diagnosis and life after loss and how to walk living children through both of those.

Carolyn said something towards the end of our time together, something that only another grieving mom would be able to hear and understand, she said: "I look forward to the sadness because through the sadness, I can have joy remembering my daughter." Such a beautiful and honest and accurate sentiment.

Make sure to listen all the way to the end when Carolyn shares a few more words that I promise will offer you freedom and hope today in your grief journey.

I am so thankful to Carolyn and her willingness to share her story and wisdom with us -- I pray it is a blessing to you.

FREE RESOURCE FOR LIFE AFTER BABY LOSS

Over the past 5 years we have helped thousands of women navigate life after the loss of a baby and we pulled our best and most helpful resources all into one easy to access resource. There is a separate bundle for miscarriage, infant loss and life-limiting diagnosis so the resources are very specific, tailored to you and your grief journey. To get your free resource bundle head to themorning.com/resourcebundle

CHRISTMAS BIBLE STUDY GUIDEwww.themorning.com/christmas

RESOURCE FOR HOW TO LOVE A GRIEVING MOM www.themorning.com/friendsandfamily

SHOW NOTESwww.themorning.com/blog/episode137

FREE ONLINE COMMUNITY www.themorning.com/community

A very special episode as we end Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month.

For us here at The Morning and on The Joyful Mourning Podcast, honoring your babies, telling your stories, raising awareness about the tragic reality of baby loss, and helping those who love a grieving mom better understand what she needs and how to best support her, is not something that ends when awareness month is over.

This is why we are here, week after week, month after month, year after year -- to offer support and community, to remind you that you aren't alone, to help you navigate the difficult and complex realities of life after baby loss.

We wanted to commemorate the end of this special month by sharing your voices, your stories and your wisdom. Listen in to this very very special episode, made up of nearly 30 women with different stories of loss all sharing what they wish others understood about baby loss.

• If you are a grieving mom this episode will make you feel less alone.
• If you love a grieving mom this episode will help you love and understand her better.

I am incredibly thankful to the women who so beautifully and courageously shared their stories and wisdom on this episode. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

It was my joy to listen and learn from you and it is my honor to walk alongside you in your grief.

FREE RESOURCE FOR LIFE AFTER BABY LOSS

Over the past 5 years we have helped thousands of women navigate life after the loss of a baby and we pulled our best and most helpful resources all into one easy to access resource. There is a separate bundle for miscarriage, infant loss and life-limiting diagnosis so the resources are very specific, tailored to you and your grief journey. To get your free resource bundle head to themorning.com/resourcebundle

RESOURCE FOR HOW TO LOVE A GRIEVING MOM www.themorning.com/friendsandfamily

SHOW NOTESwww.themorning.com/blog/episode136

FREE ONLINE COMMUNITY www.themorning.com/community

Listen in as I spend time with Mary Prince and she shares her motherhood journey with me. She talks honestly and candidly about her recurrent miscarriages, and then her son Noah who was born at 26 weeks due to a placental rupture who would die just a few short months later as a result of a rare and very difficult to diagnose heart defect. I ask Mary to talk about what it's been like to be an invisible mother, having experienced pregnancy 4 times, having delivered a baby boy and mothered him in the nicu, but now to have only empty arms.

Mary shares what has surprised her about her motherhood journey and the grief that she has endured. If you love a grieving mom, she gives really helpful wisdom and advice about what it looks like to support a mom who has experienced the loss of a baby.

At the time of this recording Mary was 18 weeks pregnant and Mary gives an honest real-time look into what pregnancy after so much loss has been like. She gives wisdom and really helpful tangible advice that I think will really encourage you if you are in that season. We talk about all those things and so much more.

I am so thankful to Mary and her willingness to share her journey with us -- I pray it is a blessing to you.

FREE RESOURCE FOR LIFE AFTER BABY LOSS

Over the past 5 years we have helped thousands of women navigate life after the loss of a baby and we pulled our best and most helpful resources all into one easy to access resource. There is a separate bundle for miscarriage, infant loss and life-limiting diagnosis so the resources are very specific, tailored to you and your grief journey. To get your free resource bundle head to themorning.com/resourcebundle

SHOW NOTESwww.themorning.com/blog/episode135

FREE ONLINE COMMUNITY www.themorning.com/community

Throughout October I am highlighting specific topics surrounding pregnancy and infant loss in a series of 4 short mini bonus episodes. My hope is to give grieving moms a voice, to acknowledge your loss and at the same time to help others who have not experienced this kind of loss understand a little better what it is to be a baby loss mom.

In this third episode of the series I am sharing a non-comprehensive list of the things a grieving mom may be thinking about at any given moment. I say non-comprehensive because the things we think about as grieving moms are often complex and can be difficult to put into words. I am sharing this somewhat seemingly random list of thoughts to do two things:

1) To help a grieving mom hear me say -- you are not alone in the way you are thinking about this nor are you crazy. The way you are seeing this and thinking about this is completely normal and to be expected.

2) To help someone who has not experienced the loss of a baby better understand what is happening inside the head and heart of a grieving mom -- to have compassion and empathy when you might not understand how she is responding or better yet to have compassion and empathy when you judge her response as not appropriate.

So, if you are a grieving mom I hope this reminds you that you aren't alone. And if you are here because you love a grieving mom, I hope this helps you understand us a bit better.

Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Resources www.themorning.com/pregnancyandinfantloss.

Listen in as I spend time with Kristyn Szala and ask her all kinds of questions about her motherhood journey. Kristyn has experienced infertility, journeyed through ivf, experienced a miscarriage with one of her twins and then would go on to experience a life-limiting diagnosis for her son Asher.

During our time together Kristyn talks honestly about her experience with IVF and what it was like to lose a twin in the first trimester of pregnancy -- she shares what it was like to grieve that loss, the unique challenges it held and what advice she would give to a woman in that situation.

We go on to talk about what it was like to receive a life-limiting diagnosis for her son Asher -- what she wishes she had known, what she learned and what she would have done differently. Kristyn said that immediately after hearing the news she canceled everything, her maternity photos, her baby shower, everything. But then after thinking about it for a few days she decided this baby and this pregnancy was worth celebrating.

She said she asked herself: "how do I want this pregnancy to be? I want it to be full of joy." This part of our conversation was really beautiful and I absolutely love the idea her friend did for her in the way of a Baby Blessing -- you'll have to listen to hear exactly what I'm talking about.

We talked about a few specific tactics that were helpful to her in navigating life after loss as well as a major career change she made a few years following her son Asher's death.

The last thing we talk about very candidly and tenderly is the reality that Kristyn is unable to have more children and what it's like to navigate losing your youngest child -- if that is your reality too, I am sure that what Kristyn has to say about this will remind you that you are not alone.

FREE RESOURCE FOR LIFE AFTER BABY LOSS

Over the past 5 years we have helped thousands of women navigate life after the loss of a baby and we pulled our best and most helpful resources all into one easy to access resource. There is a separate bundle for miscarriage, infant loss and life-limiting diagnosis so the resources are very specific, tailored to you and your grief journey. To get your free resource bundle head to themorning.com/resourcebundle

SHOW NOTESwww.themorning.com/blog/episode134

FREE ONLINE COMMUNITY www.themorning.com/community

Throughout October I am highlighting specific topics surrounding pregnancy and infant loss in a series of 4 short mini bonus episodes. My hope is to give you, grieving moms, a voice, to acknowledge your loss and at the same time to help others who have not experienced this kind of loss understand a little better what it is to be a baby loss mom.

In this second episode of the series I am talking about why we as loss moms talk about our babies and addressing all the other things someone who has not experienced this kind of loss may find strange or odd, awkward or uncomfortable -- or all of the above. If you are a grieving mom I hope this gives you permission to grieve in any way that is helpful to you, and to honor and celebrate your baby in any way you choose. If you are here because you love a grieving mom, I hope this helps you understand us a bit better.

Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Resources: www.themorning.com/pregnancyandinfantloss

Listen in as I spend time with Aimee Jones as she shares with me her motherhood journey and the story of her daughter Ginny who was born still at 34 weeks. Aimee shares honestly about life after the loss, what surprised her about this journey and what were some of the unique challenges of losing her first born, having no answers as to why her daughter died and what it was like to make the decision to try to have another baby and what pregnancy after loss was like for her and what wisdom she would give to a mom entering that season.

I ask her what it was like bringing a living baby home after losing her daughter and how she coped with the grief while simultaneously holding so much joy -- her answer is so beautiful and wonderfully simple and practical. We also talk about how her grief has changed in the 2 years since she lost Ginny, what it was like at the beginning and what's it like now and I think her response will be really encouraging to anyone in the fresh days of grief. One thing

Aimee has an abundance of wisdom to share for the grieving mom and my time with her really encouraged me personally and I am certain that it will encourage you too.

FREE RESOURCE FOR LIFE AFTER BABY LOSS

Over the past 5 years we have helped thousands of women navigate life after the loss of a baby and we pulled our best and most helpful resources all into one easy to access resource. There is a separate bundle for miscarriage, infant loss and life-limiting diagnosis so the resources are very specific, tailored to you and your grief journey. To get your free resource bundle head to themorning.com/resourcebundle

SHOW NOTESwww.themorning.com/blog/episode133

FREE ONLINE COMMUNITY www.themorning.com/community

Listen in to the first bonus episode in a series I have titled Conversations with a Grieving Mom. Throughout October I will be highlighting specific topics surrounding pregnancy and infant loss in a series of short mini bonus episodes. My hope is to give you a voice, to acknowledge your loss and to help others who have not experienced this kind of loss understand a little better what it is to be a baby loss mom. In this first bonus episode I am speaking openly about why raising awareness about pregnancy and infant loss is valuable and important, why it matters.

5 Ways We Are Raising Awareness & Honoring Your Baby(s) www.themorning.com/blog/pregnancy-infant-loss-awareness-2021

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October is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness month. Maybe you saw the statistics yesterday as women raised their hand to say "I am 1 in 4" and to share their story of baby loss. Or maybe you didn't even notice, just another 'awareness' month filling up your feed. It's ok, I didn't know that October was Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month either until it was me. Until I was the 1 in the 4. But here's the thing, while you may not be the 1 you likely know her. She is your friend. Your sister. Your daughter. Your neighbor. Your coworker. The stranger at the grocery store. The acquaintance at church.

1 in 4 is so much more than a number. Raising awareness is about so much more than a statistic. It's a person. It's a life.

We raise awareness because that one matters.

We raise awareness because the numbers would tell us that if it isn't you, then you likely know someone who has experienced the loss of a baby. We raise awareness so that you might know better how to love her and care for her. Because to ignore her pain is to ignore her.

We raise awareness because we want you to know our story. To know our baby. Because to know us and not know about our baby is to not really know us at all.

--

5 Ways We Are Raising Awareness & Honoring Your Baby(s) www.themorning.com/blog/pregnancy-infant-loss-awareness-2021

Over the past 4 weeks we have been talking specifically about navigating faith after the loss of a baby, asking hard questions about God and what the Bible has to say about our loss because if you are anything like me you have asked those questions before, maybe not out loud for fear of judgment but in the quiet private corners of your own mind. Questions like Why did God allow this to happen? Did I do something wrong to deserve this? How can I trust a God who would let this happen? This series of conversations is incredibly needed and it has been a privilege to discuss these hard, but important questions.

In this final episode of this series on faith after loss, I have the privilege of interviewing Kristin Hernandez, author of the book Sunlight in December, A Mother's Story of Finding the Goodness of God in the Storm of Grief. Kristin's motherhood journey has been wrought with loss and she enters into this conversation with incredible tenderness and empathy -- as a grieving mom who has spent time wrestling with God, searching for answers, for truth and for hope.

Kristin shares her motherhood journey with us and what her spiritual walk looked like amidst her losses and after. She talks about misconceptions about what it means to be a strong christian who is grieving and what it looks like when God doesn't answer our prayers in the way we want Him to. And I loved when Kristin said "I can trust and believe what the Bible says, even when I don't feel it."

This conversation is for anyone who knows and loves God and is walking with Him. It's for the woman who is really wrestling in her faith right now. It's also for the woman who isn't quite sure what the Christian faith is all about and maybe you are looking for answers or just want to learn more -- this is a great place to start. And lastly, if you love a grieving mom, this would be a really, really great conversation to listen to in regards to better understanding what a grieving mom is experiencing as she navigates her faith journey.

Kristin and I do our best to bring the truth of scripture into these hard, difficult spaces but I am certain that there is more that could be said and additional conversation that would be potentially helpful. One of the best things I would recommend is to come join us in our free community -- a safe space where you are free to wrestle through your questions, anger, sadness, confusion and hurt. Find out more about our free community by heading to themorning.com/community. I can't wait to meet you there and talk about these things with you.

And lastly, we have pulled together our favorite free resources for navigating faith after the loss of a baby including a free 7 day devotional. Check out those resources at themorning.com/faith.

SHOW NOTES www.themorning.com/blog/episode132

In this episode I am asking a series of difficult but important questions about God, our suffering, and navigating faith after the loss of a baby to Lacey Rabalais. She spends her days studying and writing about God's Word and as a theologian who had also experienced the loss of a baby I knew she would be the perfect person to discuss these questions with. Many of the questions we are discussing today were submitted by you, listeners of the podcasts and or members of our free private community, The Joyful Mourning Community. These are real questions and like I said, somewhat difficult to answer in a way that might feel acceptable in the midst of heartbreak and sorrow.

Questions like:

• Why does suffering exist?
• Did God plan our suffering or did He just allow it?
• How can he be good if either of those are true?
• Is God powerful enough to heal my baby?
• Did He just choose not to?

I know that this conversation and some topics we talk about might be hard to think about or consider and I want to encourage you by saying that's ok -- you're free to wrestle with the truths we present here. My hope is that as you listen, even to that which might be difficult to hear or believe, that your heart would be comforted in knowing that you are not alone and that you are loved by the God of the universe far more than you could ever comprehend or imagine. And that not only does he love you but he loves your baby too.

We do our best to bring the truth of scripture into these hard, difficult spaces but I am certain that there is more that could be said and additional conversation that would be potentially helpful. One of the best things I would recommend is to come join us in our free community -- a safe space where you are free to wrestle through your questions, anger, sadness, confusion and hurt. Find out more about our free community by heading to www.themorning.com/community . I can't wait to meet you there.

Additionally we have pulled together our best resources about navigating faith after the loss of a baby including a free 7 day devotional and a few of the resources that are mentioned in this episode -- you can find all of those resources over at www.themorning.com/hope

Ok friends -- thank you for listening. I pray this episode grows your faith and your love for the God who loves you so much.

JOIN THE FREE COMMUNITY www.themorning.com/community

SHOW NOTES www.themorning.com/blog/episode131

RESOURCES FOR FAITH AFTER BABY LOSS www.themorning.com/hope