The Joyful Mourning - A Podcast for Women Who Have Experienced Pregnancy or Infant Loss

Mother's Day is especially painful when your heart is longing for a baby. So on this week leading up to Mother's Day, a week that feels difficult, impossible even, I imagine you might be feeling like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when he says: "in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints." Maybe you feel far away from God. Maybe you feel like He is punishing you. Maybe you feel like He has forgotten to be gracious. Maybe you feel like His faithfulness has come to an end and that He is no longer compassionate. Spend the next few days with me as we diligently make an effort to remember the God we love and serve. Just like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when, after his seemingly harsh lament towards God, says very decisively, "Then I said, 'I will appeal to this, to the years of the right hand of the Most High.'" (meaning I will call to mind all the ways I have seen Him work and what I know to be true from my past) and the psalmist goes on to say: "I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds." Let's spend a few minutes together each morning this week intentionally remembering who God is and what that means for us personally. DAY 05 : GOD IS LOVE Romans 8:35, 37-39 "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." What does the truth that God is love, mean for us today: It means that He is unconditionally committed to us. It means He would do anything for you and He showed that by sending Jesus to die on our behalf, there is no greater assurance of His love or His commitment to keep His promises than that moment on the cross. It is God's essential nature to love and He shows that by loving a people who do not deserve it. A people who by their own nature are rebellious towards Him. This kind of love that is essential to God's nature is not a feeling kind of love, God is bigger than mere sentiment. Rather this is sacrificial love. A love that dies for the sake of another. A love that forgives. A love that chases after those in need of rescue. A love that loves the unloveable. Romans 5:8 says "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us" And this isn't a generic blanket of love. No this is a personal and individual love. God loves you personally. That means you can trust Him with your life. With your grief. With your pain. With your deepest desires and your deepest fears. You can run to Him because He loves you more profoundly than you could ever imagine. This unconditional kind of love we see here in Romans 8 means there is nothing that could ever get in the way of His love for you. Not even your own self - not your anger or frustration or doubt or fear towards Him. Nothing can separate you from His love. He is unconditionally devoted to you -- whatever it takes. I love the way Sally Lloyd Jones describes God's love for His children as - "never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking, always and forever kind of love." --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/specialepisode05

Mother's Day is especially painful when your heart is longing for a baby. So on this week leading up to Mother's Day, a week that feels difficult, impossible even, I imagine you might be feeling like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when he says: "in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints." Maybe you feel far away from God. Maybe you feel like He is punishing you. Maybe you feel like He has forgotten to be gracious. Maybe you feel like His faithfulness has come to an end and that He is no longer compassionate. Spend the next few days with me as we diligently make an effort to remember the God we love and serve. Just like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when, after his seemingly harsh lament towards God, says very decisively, "Then I said, 'I will appeal to this, to the years of the right hand of the Most High.'" (meaning I will call to mind all the ways I have seen Him work and what I know to be true from my past) and the psalmist goes on to say: "I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds." Let's spend a few minutes together each morning this week intentionally remembering who God is and what that means for us personally. DAY 04 : GOD IS FAITHFUL Psalm 36:5, 7-9 "Your steadfast love, O Lord, extends to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds. How precious is your steadfast love, O God! The children of mankind take refuge in the shadow of your wings. They feast on the abundance of your house and you give them drink from the river of your delights. For with you is the fountain of life; in your light do we see light." What does the truth that God is faithful, mean for me and you: First, what does it mean that God is faithful? It means that He is perfectly loyal, constant, true, devoted, unwavering, steadfast, dedicated, committed. So if God is faithful, committed, devoted, constant, unwavering and loyal that means I can trust Him to always keep His promises. That He will do what He has said He will do. He will accomplish what He sets out to accomplish. He keeps His promises. He promises to be my refuge and my strength. So that means that I can run to Him for refuge because I know he will always be there. I never have to doubt His constant presence. He promises that He will never leave me so that means I can go about my day knowing I am not alone in this. He promises to bring good from this heartache. That means I can joyfully search for the ways He is working to bring about redemption. He promises a future and a hope and an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled and unfading that He is guarding and keeping safe by His power so I can look toward the future knowing that my present circumstance is not the end. We see through human eyes and humanity is never perfectly loyal or perfectly committed or perfectly constant so it is difficult to imagine a God who is. But the truth is: His faithfulness is not fickle. It does not depend on our ability to love Him in return or our ability to live a faithful life. He is faithful because He is faithful -- His constancy and commitment is not dependent on how big our faith is or how good we are or how well we are handling our grief. It is because He is a good God who's faithfulness is without measure. It reaches to the heavens. It has no bounds. There is nothing you could do or have done that would ever limit His faithfulness or His love towards you. And because His faithfulness never wavers you can trust Him to keep His promises. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/specialepisode04

Mother's Day is especially painful when your heart is longing for a baby. So on this week leading up to Mother's Day, a week that feels difficult, impossible even, I imagine you might be feeling like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when he says: "in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints." Maybe you feel far away from God. Maybe you feel like He is punishing you. Maybe you feel like He has forgotten to be gracious. Maybe you feel like His faithfulness has come to an end and that He is no longer compassionate. Spend the next few days with me as we diligently make an effort to remember the God we love and serve. Just like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when, after his seemingly harsh lament towards God, says very decisively, "Then I said, 'I will appeal to this, to the years of the right hand of the Most High.'" (meaning I will call to mind all the ways I have seen Him work and what I know to be true from my past) and the psalmist goes on to say: "I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds." Let's spend a few minutes together each morning this week intentionally remembering who God is and what that means for us personally. DAY 03 : GOD IS SOVEREIGN Daniel 4:34-35 "At the end of the days I, Nebuchadnezzar, lifted my eyes to heaven, and my reason returned to me, and I blessed the Most High, and praised and honored him who lives forever, for his dominion is an everlasting dominion, and his kingdom endures from generation to generation; All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as he pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back his hand or say to him: "What have you done?"" Psalm 115:3 Our God is in the heavens; he does all that he pleases. Psalm 135:5-7 For I know that the Lord is great, and that our Lord is above all gods. Whatever the Lord pleases, he does, in heaven and on earth, in the seas and all deeps. He it is who makes the clouds rise at the end of the earth, who makes lightnings for the rain and brings forth the wind from his storehouses. What does this truth about who God is, that He is Sovereign, mean for me and mean for you? First, let's talk about what the word Sovereign means -- if we were to look it up in a dictionary we would see "supreme ruler" or possessing "supreme or ultimate authority or power" But what does that mean when we apply it to God? It means that He is the ultimate source of all power, authority and everything that exists. It means that there is absolutely nothing that happens in the universe that is outside of God's influence and authority because He is over all and above all. He has no limitations. This attribute of God, His being sovereign, over all and above all, supreme and ultimate power and authority, is what makes Him superior to all other gods and makes Him, and Him alone, worthy of worship. Worthy of our trust. So what does that mean for you and me today; how does God being sovereign help me in the middle of my pain? In the middle of my paralyzing fear? It means that if He is over all and above all, and if nothing happens in the universe that is outside of His authority or His control then I am safe. It means I don't have to be afraid or live in fear because He is in control. It means I can live with a joy even amidst my pain because I know that He has not forgotten me, He sees me, He loves me more deeply than I can ever imagine so I can trust that what is in front of me can be used for my good and His glory. Even when it hurts. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/specialepisode03

Mother's Day is especially painful when your heart is longing for a baby. So on this week leading up to Mother's Day, a week that feels difficult, impossible even, I imagine you might be feeling like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when he says: "in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints." Maybe you feel far away from God. Maybe you feel like He is punishing you. Maybe you feel like He has forgotten to be gracious. Maybe you feel like His faithfulness has come to an end and that He is no longer compassionate. Spend the next few days with me as we diligently make an effort to remember the God we love and serve. Just like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when, after his seemingly harsh lament towards God, says very decisively, "Then I said, 'I will appeal to this, to the years of the right hand of the Most High.'" (meaning I will call to mind all the ways I have seen Him work and what I know to be true from my past) and the psalmist goes on to say: "I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds." Let's spend a few minutes together each morning this week intentionally remembering who God is and what that means for us personally. DAY 02 : GOD IS EVER PRESENT "Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me. If I say, "Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night," even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you." Psalm 139:7-12 "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you." Isaiah 43:2 What does this truth about who God is, that He is Ever-Present, mean for me and mean for you? It means that He is always with me and He is always with you. It means we are never alone. It means that He doesn't expect us to face the pain and the hurt and the brokenness on our own. It means that "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me." Psalm 23 It means you never have to be afraid. Because the God who is All-Powerful, the God who is never overwhelmed, the God who has never faced a challenge too difficult for Him, the God who says "Nothing is too hard for me" is right there with you. He has never left your side. He is with you in the fire and in the flood and by His power He is guarding you and protecting you. You are safe because He is there. You are never, ever, ever alone friend. And he never meant for you to walk this road on your own. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/specialepisode02

Mother's Day is especially painful when your heart is longing for a baby. So on this week leading up to Mother's Day, a week that feels difficult, impossible even, I imagine you might be feeling like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when he says: "in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints." Maybe you feel far away from God. Maybe you feel like He is punishing you. Maybe you feel like He has forgotten to be gracious. Maybe you feel like His faithfulness has come to an end and that He is no longer compassionate. Spend the next few days with me as we diligently make an effort to remember the God we love and serve. Just like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when, after his seemingly harsh lament towards God, says very decisively, "Then I said, 'I will appeal to this, to the years of the right hand of the Most High.'" (meaning I will call to mind all the ways I have seen Him work and what I know to be true from my past) and the psalmist goes on to say: "I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds." Let's spend a few minutes together each morning this week intentionally remembering who God is and what that means for us personally. DAY 01 : GOD IS ALL-POWERFUL "Ah, Lord God! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you." Jeremiah 32:17 What does this truth, that He is all-powerful, mean for me? It means that He can help me with anything and through anything. Nothing is too hard for Him. Nothing is impossible for Him. Nothing that stands as insurmountable for Him. Nothing, not one thing in the history of the world, that is overwhelming to God. Your pain is not too big for Him to heal. Neither is your relentless anxiety. Your restlessness and sleeplessness. Your deep fear. Your bitter jealousy. Your joyless heart. Your utter brokenness. None of it is too big for Him to heal and restore and make new. None of it overwhelms Him. Nothing is too hard for Him. You are not too much for Him. His strength and His wisdom are sufficient. He can do it. Maybe it's because we have likened God to humanity that we forget His power. We see our inability, we feel our overwhelm, we sense our powerlessness and we mistakenly assume the same for God. But He is God. And we are not. May our inability point to His ability today. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning SPECIAL EPISODE 01 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/specialepisode01

Whether you are walking through infertility, miscarriage, infant loss or you are here because you love someone who is walking through that kind of grief -- the truth and wisdom shared in this episode will undoubtedly leave you changed. Listen in as my friend Gina Zeidler gives the most honest, tender and truth-filled interview. Gina is a wife, a mama, and an amazing photographer -- she is also a woman who has walked through years of infertility and two miscarriages. Her honesty about how she has grappled to believe that God is good amidst such pain and loss offers freedom to the woman who is fighting to believe in His goodness today. Her honesty about what she wishes people on the outside knew about infertility and baby loss is tangibly helpful for those who are desperately trying to help a grieving friend. Gina's vulnerability and candid wise words are filled with such hope that I promise this interview will leave you different -- whether its the way you give yourself the freedom to ask for help when you're hurting or the freedom to talk to God honestly or the freedom to realize, maybe for the first time, that God will bring about healing, that you will have joy again. Gina's story isn't wrapped up with a tidy bow and yet she speaks with joy and hope. I am sure that because of this, no matter where you are in this grief journey, this episode is sure to bless you. DO YOU FEEL ALONE IN YOUR GRIEF? In Gina's final words to the listeners she encourages women who are grieving to find community. Find women who understand what this pain feels like. Women who can say "I know" and really mean it. Gina talks about how invaluable this kind of support is in the healing process. If you are listening today and you feel alone in your grief, come join our free online community by clicking here. DO YOU LOVE SOMEONE WHO IS GRIEVING? As we near Mother's Day I just wanted to let you know about two things: 1. I have created a set of really beautiful instant download, printable greeting cards specifically for the grieving mother on Mother's Day. One of the kindest and most generous things you can do for a grieving mother is tell her you love her on Mother's Day; that you're praying for her and remembering her. These cards will help you do that very thing. You can find those at shop.themorning.com/collections/mothers-day-cards. 2. If you are looking for a gift for your grieving friend this Mother's Day, I have the perfect thing for you. Check out The Morning Gift Shop, a carefully curated gift guide for grieving mothers. You can find that over at www.themorning.com/giftshop. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com GIFT SHOP FOR GRIEVING MOTHERS: www.themorning.com/giftshop THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 031 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode031

You're listening to The Joyful Mourning Podcast Episode #30. Listen in as I talk with my new friend Jenna Dail. Jenna is the founder of The Color Blue & Hope, a non-profit organization that provides comfort and care resources for women on bed rest in the form of Boxes of Hope. She founded this organization after experiencing a significant period of bed rest while pregnant with her twin boys, fighting to keep them alive. Jenna knows the pain of bed rest and she knows the pain of loss when bed rest doesn't end the way you hope it would, with two healthy baby boys on the other side. During our time together, Jenna talks honestly about the realities of bed rest and the difficult reality of losing her twin boys. She shares openly about pregnancy after loss and gives a few very practical words of wisdom about walking through that season. We talk about the expectations we put on ourselves and on others while grieving and she shares the most valuable piece of wisdom her counselor gave her regarding those expectations. Jenna also talks about what it looked like for her to finally realize that she didn't have to hide her grief from her older children and instead what a meaningful role it is to help them learn what it looks like to navigate hard things. Lastly, she shares why she started a non-profit and what she loves about it most may surprise you. This episode is sure to bring practical wisdom and freedom to your grief journey. DO YOU FEEL ALONE IN YOUR GRIEF? In this episode, Jenna shares how important it is to find a friend to talk to and walk through this journey with. If you feel alone and need a friend who understands the realities of life after losing a baby, come join our free online community by going to www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com. DO YOU LOVE SOMEONE WHO IS GRIEVING? As we near Mother's Day I just wanted to let you know about two things: 1. I have created a set of really beautiful instant download, printable greeting cards specifically for the grieving mother on Mother's Day. One of the kindest and most generous things you can do for a grieving mother is tell her you love her on Mother's Day; that you're praying for her and remembering her. These cards will help you do that very thing. You can find those at shop.themorning.com/collections/mothers-day-cards. 2. If you are looking for a gift for your grieving friend this Mother's Day, I have the perfect thing for you. Check out The Morning Gift Shop, a carefully curated gift guide for grieving mothers. You can find that over at www.themorning.com/giftshop. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com GIFT SHOP FOR GRIEVING MOTHERS: www.themorning.com/giftshop THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 030 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode030

You're listening to The Joyful Mourning Podcast Episode #29. In this week's episode I have the privilege of spending some time with Josefina Sanders. Josefina is a writer an artist who has used words and art to process through the grief of losing a baby. Josefina shares her story of miscarriage and the ways she found healing. Shes talks about the value of journaling through the grief and a few very simple and practical tips for getting started with journaling if that is something that is new to you. She also shares invaluable wisdom about walking through grief with a spouse or partner -- how important it is to ask questions like "how are you?" even when the other person is processing so differently than you are. And as we end our time together Josefina gives so much freedom to women who are grieving by saying "Be gentle with yourself. Give yourself time and space to grieve." This episode is sure to bless you today as Josefina's wisdom is beyond her years and her joy is contagious. I hope you love listening as much as I loved chatting with my new friend. DO YOU FEEL ALONE IN YOUR GRIEF? Josefina mentioned in our time together was how helpful it was to find women who understood the pain of miscarriage when she was walking through her grief. If you are alone in your grief and just need another woman who has been there and understands, come join The Joyful Mourning Community. It's a free online community created to be a safe place for women just like you to be reminded they aren't alone in this, to find another woman who understands, who can listen and pray and offer wisdom and just be there so you don't have to feel alone anymore. Come join us by going to thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 029 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode029

You're listening to The Joyful Mourning Podcast Episode 028. In this week's episode I get to spend some time chatting with Libby Marler, a wife, a mother and an experienced counselor who recently set out to specifically help families who have received difficult news such as fatal diagnosis'. Libby shares her own story of her daughter Meredith, what it was like to receive the news that Meredith had a life-threatening congenital heart defect, what it was like to lose her after complications from an open heart surgery and what it has been like since then, learning to live without her. Libby shares an incredible amount of wisdom about walking through grief -- wisdom that will bring you freedom in your own grief today. We talk about bringing all of our emotions, all of our feelings, even the messy, ugly ones, to God and how He wants us to bring those things to Him. We talk about the importance of community and friendships and saying out loud how we are doing and how much healing takes place when that happens. And if you are here because you love someone who is grieving -- we have so much wisdom for you in this episode too and we even share the one question we think you should be asking to someone who is hurting. I'm so grateful you are here friend and I pray this episode blesses you today. -- DO YOU FEEL ALONE IN YOUR GRIEF? As I mentioned, and as you will hear, Libby and I spend time talking about the value of community, of friendships, of having a safe place to process how we are doing. If you are looking for that very thing, if you feel alone in your grief and just need another person to listen, come join The Joyful Mourning Community. It's an online community of women just like you who can listen and pray and offer wisdom and just be there so you don't have to feel alone anymore. Come join us by going to thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com. I'll see you there. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 028 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode028

In this episode I get to spend some time with my friend Jess Connolly as she shares the story of her miscarriage. Listen in as Jess gives invaluable wisdom about loss and grief. She shares with us the most helpful advice she was given after her miscarriage, that came her mom; advice that I wish every woman could hear and allow to inform the way in which they grieve. We talk about the dichotomy of fear and joy that co-exist when a woman who has experienced miscarriage gets pregnant again. We talk about what it looks like to give your spouse the space to grieve and we even talk about the enneagram.* Jess also shares one of the most tender and encouraging visual images that will remind an aching heart that though there may be death in our physical bodies, God is still growing something good in the spiritual. We talk about the value of saying out loud the fears or insecurities or lies we are believing about our grief and the importance of finding a safe place to say those things. If you are need of a safe place to voice those things, come join us at The Joyful Mourning Community -- created to be that very thing, a safe place where you can feel known and understood in your grief. A place where other women who understand what you are going through can remind you that there is no shame in the way you are processing your grief. To join the The Joyful Mourning community go here: www.themorning.com/community. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 027 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode027