BG. Shane Reeves, the 15th Dean of the Academics Board at West Point joins the Jumping Point podcast for our latest episode

Shane Reeves is a Brigadier General in the U.S. Army. He is the 15th Dean of the Academic Board of the United States Military Academy at West Point, N.Y, and previously served as Professor and Head of the Department of Law. He founded and was a Co-Director of the Lieber Institute for Law and Land Warfare.

While he could have practiced law anywhere but he couldn’t see himself doing it anywhere else but the US Army. His law focus has no greater stakes and focuses on National security, War and War Crimes which has taught how to understand the Human Condition.  

Shane is an incredible example of Humble Selfless Service and in a charismatic and funny way he’s the lessons he’s learned in leadership and understanding humans that we can apply in our daily lives. 

• Humans are Humans – people always
• Step Up – If We don’t Lead then Who Will?
• Winning matters but it’s not, zero sum game, humbly champion the success of others
• Access to Information does not mean Wisdom
• Red Cell Everything
• Dispassionate disagreement
• Intellectual Coddling / Intellectual Adversity – Out think our Problems.

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𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐃𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐘 – 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐌𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐑𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞

I was first introduced to cold immersion by Wim Hof a few years ago and now one of my favorite hobbies it to study the work of Dr. Andrew Huberman of Stanford. His research includes documents the myriad of benefits of cold-water immersion:

• Metabolism, Optimizing Brown Fat Cells
• Mood (Dopamine regulation), Mindset, Mental Health Recovery
• Exercise Recovery
• Pain & Inflammation regulation
• Focus & Mental Resilience

I am 100% seeking the psychological change.  I am training for psychological resilience on a daily basis with deliberate periods of physiological discomfort. Through repetition we can develop a Habit and build more neurological feedback loops in the direction of taking action in the face of stress, strain and discomfort.  

By utilizing the powerful connection between psychology and physiology we can change our narrative and remove our self-imposed limitations.  

Multiple mornings have gone by where I say “ugh …I don’t want to do this”. I even begin developing justifications and excuses …” This is Excessive”, “Who do I think I am?”,” I’ve done it long enough”. I almost quit. As soon as I hear that voice and feel that physical feeling in my Vagus Nerve…I take IMMEDIATE Action in the opposite direction. I do it any way… I step and WIN that small mental battle.

This is me keeping a promise to myself. My SELF heard me commit to cold showers and each time I live up to that promise, I solidify the belief that I am a person who does what they say they will do.  𝐀𝐬 𝐃𝐨𝐧 𝐌𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐑𝐮𝐢𝐳 𝐩𝐮𝐭𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐈 – 𝐁𝐞 𝐈𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐜𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝.

At some point throughout the day and life there will come times that I have to endure discomfort and each day I prove to my SELF that I am capable.  

The water is also never as cold as I think it will be the second before step in. The narrative in my mind is worse than reality. The meditation I use while in the cold helps me focus on:

Where else in my life is my narrative worse than reality?

Where am I suffering my imagination in advance?

 Where do I procrastinate?  …maybe the water isn’t that cold.  

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞?

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“𝐃𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐓𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐀𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐏𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲” – 𝐀𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐈𝐈, Don Miguel Ruiz

In his book The Four Agreements (A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom), author Don Miguel Ruiz suggest that we must make an agreement with ourselves to not take anything personally.

When we think of taking things personally, we often think of receiving criticism from another person or some external event the we feel is happening to us specifically because of us. We tell ourselves some version of the story that “if I were different or if I were someone different than they wouldn’t say that or this wouldn’t be happening”.  In that moment we are acting on an overdeveloped sense of Personal Importance. Taking the words or actions of others as personal to us is actually an extreme expression of selfishness.

We are making it about all about ourselves when it may have nothing to do with us at all.  We may hear feedback from another person as judgment or as criticism because we each process what we hear through our awareness of our flaws, weaknesses, and insecurities. We are not affected emotionally by what is actually said, but rather by our interpretation which is formed by our beliefs.

 Taking things personally is a direct result of the stories we tell ourselves and what we ultimately believe about ourselves. We believe a story about ourselves and their words touch an emotional wound that causes pain. We create a narrative of what the person meant with their words rather than what they actually said.

Notice how many words refer to SELF in this description?  Are we being selfish and taking things personally?

What story do we have a habit of reliving when we take things personally?

What are the cues that cause me the or remember this story?

 What is my usually reaction to this story?

 How can I respond instead?

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Dr. Marina Theodotou, EdD is an incredible example of the fact that how we start does not have to determine how we finish.  She reminds us in this episode that “we don’t determine the cards we’re dealt but we do have a choice in how we play them “

At a young age she was exposed to having to flee her home country of Cyprus and grow up in a foreign country in Northern Africa.  Even in her description of that event she is careful to say that just because they lost every material possession, she did not lose everything because she had her family.  That experience and hardship along with the example of her parents and older siblings is what forged a mindset resilience and gumption

Her mindset of gumption allowed her the opportunity to have former Bank of America CEO Hugh McColl as a mentor, pursue a Ph.D. in an entirely different field from her former experience, and make a mid-career shift where she has the opportunity to impacts the lives of thousands of people each day.

Losing a job is actually the catalyst and provided her with the freedom of newness that was the catalyst that led her to the next chapter that is even more gratifying than the one before.

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𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭, 𝐰𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦 𝐇𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐬, 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐦 𝐔𝐬 – 𝐉𝐢𝐦 𝐑𝐨𝐡𝐧

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If we have decided we want to change and we agree that our Habits are what make us who we are then we are ready to take actions. We agree that nothing changes if nothing changes or in others words in order for our life to become different, WE have to become different; take different actions. We are accountable to future self and the current results in our life is a result of our current habits.

Developing the habits required to successfully achieve goals takes rendering down the endpoint to the smallest possible action that is required to begin …and doing it.  The author Leo Babauta reminds us that “Actually, doing the habit is much more important than how much you do.” 

It’s not about quantity of each event is about repetition. Small actions create massive results when done consistently because of the concept of momentum. Momentum builds with every action we take no matter how small it is as long as it is constant an in the same direction.

If we can boil down the starting point to an actions item so small, we almost feel ridiculous not taking it we remove all obstacles and options for procrastination. 

Developing new habits requires forming new neurological loops in our brains. This means Identifying our CUES- whatever would cause us to take the negative habit. Interrupting that pattern by identifying the former actions without criticizing ourselves for having it. Replacing the action with the new habit and rewarding the new behavior. Celebrating the victory and rewarding the new behavior is crucial. Each time we celebrate it activates the dopamine sensor in the brain to anchor and reinforce those new actions with that cue which creates a desire for the new routine which brings that reward thus forming the HABIT.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”

— Will Durant’s translation of Aristotle

We are what we repeatedly do and we believe what we repeatedly think. “I AM” are the two most powerful words we can say to ourselves because whatever we follow that with is how we identify ourselves and expresses what we believe about ourselves. The language we use carries power. Whatever we repeatedly say will slowly become a Habit of thought and that habit will solidify a core belief within us.  It’s those core beliefs that will then dictate our actions and those actions become what we repeatedly do. Our lives will be a summation of the actions we take habitually.

If I’m constantly telling myself a story that is some version of: “I AM” too much of this or “I AM” not enough of that, then I am reinforcing ideas that will eventually determine the daily actions I take.  

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Up to 40% of our daily lives are repeated with behaviors and activities that are in near-exact as the day before. Day after day we think the same thoughts, drive on the same roads, eat the same set of foods and do the same tasks. We slip into a what feels like a robotic trance of thoughtless habit. 

Those daily actions, Repetition, routine, ritual and consistency known as our habits dictate who we are and what we become. Living a life of success and happiness is not an accident, it’s a habit.  Our habits of action will dictate what we become which will then reinforce the language and beliefs we have and around we go. Our quality of life, feelings of success and our sense of wellbeing become a self-fulfilling prophesy.

In order to change what we think of ourselves and what our future self becomes, were going to have to Act our way in to a better way of thinking because we simply think up better actions. To change our thoughts, we start with our actions.   

The most important aspect of habit formation is getting started.  Every small act can make an enormous difference in our life so Start by doing Just one thing! Even if we don’t feel like it, do it anyway. The actions lead and the belief will follow.

Jeff “Montis Man” Harris is a living example that We Can Do Hard Things !

On Dec 25, 2018 he was diagnosed with Achalasia and did not eat solid food until Dec 25, 2019.  He endured 365 days of living on protein shakes multiple surgeries, needing to sleep upright in a chair all while serving as a CEO and continuing to compete in Endurance Races.

When it comes to self-discipline and a Hunger for Greatness, He’s learned a few things because e’s had to do a few things. He set out to be an example of how to shift our victim mindset to a warrior mindset.

“Our Attitude it the most important decision we make every day” – Jeff Harris.

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐂𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐨𝐱 - 𝐋𝐞𝐬 𝐁𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧! – Les Brown

Our words not only have wisdom but they can work wonders. Sharing a kind or encouraging message to another human being can change the course of their actions and what they believe about themselves.

Helping others fills our cup more than any accolade or material possession. Walking a path with another person and using our experience to pay forward is one of the many gifts granted by #mentorship. This symbiotic relationship is a conduit for 𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 . Sharing our experiences with another person clarifies our message and hold us accountable to our own advice.

A truly #gratifying experience happens when we share a part of ourselves with another human being. When we lean in to #vulnerability and share honestly about the challenges, thoughts and the lessons we’ve learned from our experiences. We give the other person and opportunity to find a connection they may have never thought they'd have. Even though the circumstance may differ, the way we felt during that moment is the same and they relate to us in a deeper way. This opens the door for many more meaningful conversations in the future.  

No one person accomplishes great things on their own. They have a team of people guiding and encouraging them along the way. Who we surround ourselves with and the attitudes, outlooks and language they use eventually become our own They become our examples of what we believe is possible. Those beliefs are reinforced our words and actions.

#mentors allow us to go places within ourselves that we may not go by ourselves because they can see things in us that we may not see in ourselves.

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐋𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥! 

QUESTIONS FOR THE WEEK:

Who are the mentors you're surrounding yourself with?

Who in your life are you encouraging?

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“𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐚𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐝𝐮𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐭𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐭 – 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐬 𝐀𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐬

WE HAVE THE CHOICE. We don’t have to allow our external circumstances to govern our thoughts, emotions, and actions. When we are doing this, we are living our lives in a reactive state and our mental and spiritual condition are at the mercy of the natural unpredictable realities of life.

It’s not all about us - we cannot live our lives based on our personal preference on how things “should” be or thinking that we have complete control over external people, places and things. If we allow external circumstances to have sole control over our internal state of happiness and wellbeing then we are actively choosing a life of resentment, fear and disappointment and actively refusing a life of gratitude, serenity, and fulfillment.

Living life on life’s terms means being mindfully fit and continuing to increase our awareness of our natural reactions to life and how they affect our thoughts and actions. Putting this principle into practice takes time and effort.

The first step to no longer living a reactive life is acceptance. If we are disturbed, it is because I find some fact of life in some way unacceptable to our personal preference.  I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.

We must actively work on raising our awareness of our natural reactions to life where these natural reactions or emotions originated and how they affect our actions allows us to 𝐑𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐯𝐬 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐭.

WE HAVE THE CHOICE

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Tammy Barlette is a Lieutenant Colonel with over 20 years of active duty service to our nation, who founded a speaking collective featuring female veterans (www.AthenasVoiceUSA.com).

She is a fighter pilot who flew the mighty A-10 Warthog, a graduate of the prestigious US Air Force Weapons School and an experienced Remotely Piloted Aircraft (RPA) pilot.

Her professional experience is highly unique and powerfully impacted her outlook on life.  She is passionate about sharing what she's learned with the world, believing the power of positive and inspiring human connection can change people for the better.

She is on a mission to help others see the power to accomplish great things is within them.

Her stories of triumph and tribulation will move you to action.

Athena Voice 

Tammy Barlette - YouTube

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