The Just Checking In Podcast

In episode 282 of The Just Checking In Podcast we checked in with Holly Brencher.Holly is a journalist and currently works as an AI Expansion Reporter at Newsquest.We came across Holly through a very personal article she wrote on Newsquest about the death of her brother Billy, who tragically took his own life 6th November 2024.The article was called a ‘Tribute to Welling's Billy Payne - love, struggle and advocacy’.In this episode we discuss how Holly got into journalism, through a chance workshop she saw on how to get into the industry after initially picking courses on script writing, despite her anxiety about going to university altogether.We then discuss the three year journalism degree she did at News Associates, based in Twickenham and landing the job she is in now.For industry issues, we discuss work-life balance and social class.For Holly’s mental health, we discuss her experience of anxiety from an early age and her difficulties with it when she entered an all-girls school in secondary school. This included severe panic attacks which took her out of school for a year and a half. We then discuss the life and death of her brother Billy, who is her half-brother biologically.On that aforementioned day in November 2024, Holly and her mum were given the news that Billy had taken his own life in prison. This is the first major grief Holly has gone through and she has been trying to process the news in the months following his death. There has been an inquest into Billy’s death which is still ongoing at time of recording and hopefully once this has been completed, Holly and her family can have closure.As always, #itsokaytoventYou can read Holly's article in full here: https://www.newsshopper.co.uk/news/24748582.tribute-wellings-billy-payne---love-struggle-advocacy/Support Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvkTRIGGER WARNING: this podcast contains a deep discussion about grief, loss and suicide, which some listeners may find upsetting or distressing, so please listen with caution.

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In this episode of Mind On The Game we checked back in with Aaron Bowes. Aaron plays as the First XV fly-half in the Ashford Rugby Club's Men's team. He is also an old friend of VENT Founder Freddie Cocker. We first checked back in with Aaron way back when in December 2020, where we discussed how he got into rugby, the life skills it gave him including self-confidence and his friendship with Freddie, when they first met whilst studying at Sussex University together. We also discussed some bullying he went through in school because of his ears and the operation he had to pin them back which stopped the bullying and the fresh start it gave him.In Part 2, we discuss an ACL injury Aaron suffered in September 2021, at a point where he was playing his best rugby, the surgery he had to have for it in June 2022 and the recovery journey he went through for a whole year, before starting playing again in the 2023/24 season.We also discuss his desire to get back into the gym now he is fully recovered and so he avoids going through a similar injury again, and some memorable games he's played in this year and last year which helped him get his mojo back.For Aaron’s continued mental health journey, we discuss the milestone of reaching 30 years old, the stress of buying a house with his partner and the role she has played on his mental health, and a recent award he received at his workplace.As always, #itsokaytoventYou can listen to Part 1 of Aaron's journey here: https://soundcloud.com/venthelpuk/mind-on-the-game-aaron-bowesSupport Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvk

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In episode 281 of The Just Checking In Podcast we checked in with Tom Toolan. Tom Toolan is a father and the Founder of the 'Find Rhian' campaign, a campaign he started to find his daughter Rhian who was abducted by her mother in 2018, taken out of the UK and to her home country of Poland against a court order. Rhian was just six years old at the time.Rhian's abduction is a Criminal Offence under the 1984 Child Abduction Act and is currently wanted by Suffolk Police for the abduction. Despite his campaigning work, Rhian has not been found and Polish authorities have done very little to nothing to help him. In this episode we first discuss Tom’s upbringing in Liverpool and his working-class background, the death of his dad and Tom’s discovery that he had suffered from mental health difficulties.We then discuss his marriage and divorce from his first wife, which caused him to lose his house and contact with his children from that relationship. Tom then married again but it unfortunately ended in divorce again, and he spent another period on his own. He said this was the lowest point in his life up to that point.Tom then entered into a relationship with Rhian’s mother but this relationship broke down in 2017. Prior to Rhian’s abduction, Tom went through the family court system where he was faced with false accusations of rape and domestic abuse from Rhian’s mother in the UK and the astonishing situation where his second ex-wife testified against him in court too and he claims campaigned to encourage Rhian’s abduction.He then went through the Polish court system where she made further claims of alcoholism and implied he had used her for slave labour and exploitation. At time of recording Rhian will be around 11 years old and she has been completely alienated from her father. We chart Tom's story from the start to where it is now, the campaigning work Tom is continuing to do to fight for his daughter, what needs to change in the UK legal system to give fathers a voice, why this issue continues to be ignored by the mainstream mental health conversation and how it plays into the conversation around male suicide. As always, #itsokaytoventYou can find out more about the 'Find Rhian' campaign here: https://www.rhiantoolan.com/Support Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvk

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In episode 280 of The Just Checking In Podcast we checked in with Luke Loughlin, and his sister Lindsay Loughlin. We first checked in with Luke in JCIP #244 where we discussed the story of men's mental health platform Men United, whom he was previously a co-founder of. We also discussed his own personal story of being diagnosed with ADHD and a learning difficulty, sexual abuse by a female perpetrator, addiction and suicidality. We then discussed his journey of recovery, using faith as a vehicle for it, getting sober and practicing sobriety, and working on his attachment style. All these positive steps have got him to where he is today. The missing part of the conversation around addiction in the mainstream, and it’s one we wanted to cover in this episode is the negative behaviours it causes addicts to do, and how the addicted person's loved ones handle those behaviours and find a path back to a healthy relationship, if that is possible.In this episode with Luke and Lindsay, we discuss their family upbringing and the values their parents instilled in them, the rough tides of Luke’s addiction and the sexual abuse he went through which fuelled the addiction. We then discuss the difficult decisions Lindsay and her family made to detach from Luke whilst he was in the throes of this addiction.We then explore the concept of forgiveness, how Luke forgave himself for his actions and understanding his abuse and how Lindsay felt when she discovered the abuse Luke had been going through and the context it provided for his actions and addiction.We then finish by discussing how Lindsay and his family forgave Luke and, together, found a path back to redemption, love and reaching the place they are now in their relationship. Since we checked in, Luke is now godfather to Lindsay’s son, Luke’s nephew and is giving back to his family and his community through his church, other avenues of positivity and will be starting his own new project in 2025 called 'The Inside Job Project'.The inspiration for the name is because, as Luke says, ‘recovery is an inside job. Change is an inside job’. Recovery only started for Luke when he got honest with himself, owned his shit and self-reflected to discover the trauma he had buried. Once he had done that, he started to produce a change inside that lead to outside changes in his life.As always, #itsokaytoventYou can follow Luke on social media below: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentalhealthloughlin/You can listen to Part 1 of Luke's journey here: https://soundcloud.com/venthelpuk/jcip-244-luke-loughlinSupport Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvkTRIGGER WARNING: this podcast contains a brief discussion about sexual abuse, which some listeners may find extremely upsetting or distressing, so please listen with caution.

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In episode 279 of The Just Checking In Podcast we checked in with Leah Morris.Leah currently works as a Centre Manager at the Liverpool branch of James’ Place UK, a charity who are doing lifesaving work for men's mental health.Leah was diagnosed with Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD) in her early 20s after experiencing some workplace bullying in a previous role prior to joining James’ Place UK. Prior to that, she had experienced panic attacks as a teenager whilst studying for her GCSEs but didn’t know what they were at the time. After she was diagnosed with GAD, she was prescribed medication in 2019, specifically Fluoxetine which she said helped get her back to a baseline level and she has now been off medication in 2020.At the heart of her mental health recovery has been fitness and exercise. Before the Covid-19 pandemic, she started running, doing the ‘couch to 5k’ programme. She got to the point where she was running 5ks three times a week for a year.However, in Christmas 2021, she bought a house and stopped running when she was dealing with the upheaval that moving house brings. She tried picking up running again in 2022 but couldn’t get back into it. In May 2023, she joined James’ Place UK and at the start of 2024, she got back into fitness, this time trying swimming to help her mental health. She found her rhythm again and now swims three times a week at time of recording. In this episode we talk about Leah’s anxiety, workplace bullying, the role fitness played in her recovery and the importance of having the right support network around you to maintain or boost your mental health.As always, #itsokaytoventSupport Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvk

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In episode 278 of The Just Checking In Podcast we checked in with Evan Grant.Evan Grant is a mental health campaigner and the Co-Founder, alongside his wife Carol and son Alastair of the Cameron Grant Memorial Trust.The Trust was set up in memory of his son Cameron, who tragically took his own life in 2014, when he was just 21 years old. Cameron’s death devastated Evan’s family and they set up the Trust shortly after Cameron’s death to try and change the conversation around mental health.Wee came across Evan’s story through James’ Place UK as he was interviewed by The Times as part of the newspaper’s Christmas Appeal, in which Evan called for another centre to be set up in Birmingham, alongside the centres already established in London, Liverpool and Newcastle.In this episode, we discuss Evan’s 35-year career at IBM, fatherhood, Cameron’s life, his love of ultimate frisbee, his suicide and the grief that was inflicted upon him and his family then, and how he reflects on it 10 years on. We then discuss the work that the Cameron Grant Memorial Trust has done over those 10 years, shipping over 1.4m of Cameron’s Coasters and more than 230,000 postcards and business cards around the UK, Evan's public speaking work in schools, universities and workplaces and letting everyone know that “There is always someone you can talk to.”As always, #itsokaytoventYou can find out more about the Cameron Grant Memorial Trust here: https://www.camgrant.org.uk/You can follow the Trust on social media below: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cammemorial/You can read The Sunday Times article we discussed in full here: https://www.thetimes.com/uk/society/article/avoid-the-hurt-of-the-lost-years-and-lost-chances-suicide-christmas-appeal-bxv70m3v6.You can also sign up the Trust's charity bike ride to Amsterdam here: https://www.redfoxcycling.co.uk/event-details-registration/hampton-in-arden-to-amsterdam-cycle-challenge-may-2025-2Support Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvk

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In this episode of Behind The Mic we checked back in with Norwegian artist, Severin. We first checked in with Severin in August 2023. In Part 1 we discussed his musical identity, moving from singing and producing music in English to Norwegian, overcoming shyness he had as a child and how his artist persona was a vehicle for him to gain confidence and improve his self-esteem. Since we checked in, Sev has tried release as much music as possible. He has released a series of singles, as well as two EPs, ‘i fer ikkje sove’ and ‘i elska at du gjaer me ildt’.In this episode we discuss these two EPs and the musical direction he has gone in from his earlier records, performing at Trondstad Calling festival, supporting a massive Norwegian-crossover artist Sigrid at her Molde show this year and his plans for a tour of Norway in 2025. For Sev’s continued mental health journey, we talk about his recent experiences of social anxiety, how he’s managed it and the tools he uses to combat it. His partner and him are both good listeners and have similar personalities, which can bring a lot of positives. However, after they moved in together, the downside is they can tend to enjoy staying in too much and aren't as social as they feel they should be, and we talk about finding the right balance between a good night in and keeping up appearances. As always, #itsokaytoventListen to Severin on streaming platforms below:Spotify: open.spotify.com/artist/6ulhSTqJ3…TrS8GGEk5KfTrtiQYouTube: www.youtube.com/@gossegutYou can follow Severin on social media below:TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@gossegutInstagram: www.instagram.com/gossegut/You can listen to Part 1 of Severin's journey here: https://soundcloud.com/venthelpuk/behind-the-mic-severinSupport Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvkOutro: Severin - Toxic: https://open.spotify.com/track/5joGcsBgPiOPf1hbgme5CF?si=f35b43f71de54908

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In episode 277 of The Just Checking In Podcast we checked in with Earl John Charlton.Earl is currently employed by Northumbria University as a professional with lived experience. However, prior to that he has worked as an outreach worker and a seller for The Big Issue, one of the most important charities in the UK for giving homeless people an income, dignity and pride.Earl spent 18 years of his life being homeless. His start in life began with trauma and violence as he witnessed his dad domestically abusing his mum from the ages of 3-13 years old. He was subsequently placed into the care system but ran away from it at 14 and became homeless for the first time until he was 19. He became a heroine and crack cocaine addict and stayed an addict for the next 19 years, as well as an addiction to alcohol for 20 years.He then became involved in drug gangs, running county lines for them to earn money and feed his addiction. His rock bottom moment came in 2013/14 after he had been in London for a few years when he put himself in serious danger after a dispute with one of the gangs. He managed to escape London through a friend and went back to the North East. By the time he had beat heroine and crack cocaine addiction in 2014, alcohol addiction in 2016 and a methadone addiction in 2018, Early had nearly died twice and nearly lost his leg three times.We came across Earl through his interview in a hugely powerful film by Lorna Tucker called ‘Someone’s Daughter, Someone’s Son’, which highlights the plight of many homeless people across the UK. Since Earl has gotten clean, he has started giving back to his South Shields community by working as an outreach worker and putting on open-mic nights with musicians from the local community. He also got national media coverage when UK Rock artist Sam Fender came across Earl’s story and they had a conversation you can find on YouTube. That has culminated in one song on Sam’s upcoming new album ‘People Watching’ being about Earl called ‘Crumbling Empire’.In this episode we chart Earl’s life journey, from witnessing the domestic abuse, to the negative impact not having a positive father figure in his life had on him, being homeless for 18 years, becoming a father and then losing access to his son when his partner left him one day, the throes of addiction and his recovery to where he is now. We then discuss all the advocacy and community work he has done since getting clean, meeting Sam Fender and much more. As always, #itsokaytoventYou can watch 'Someone's Daughter, Someone's Son' in full here: https://youtu.be/vhiwguIxoyA?si=Qj-tFCM0-Pyms0e1You can listen to Crumbling Empire by Sam Fender here: https://open.spotify.com/track/5M4BVWXiOUabQUqdY8eqJt?si=qO919ccTRQ2b51WmSzYJCA&context=spotify%3Aalbum%3A6Abecbed8BYAdHy9RaVoY7You can watch Earl's interview with Sam Fender here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyLlnTvaGz8&pp=ygUYdGhlIGJpZyBpc3N1ZSBzYW0gZmVuZGVyYou can follow Earl on social media below: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/earljc78/Support Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvk

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In episode 276 of The Just Checking In Podcast we checked back in with James Roffey. James is a personal trainer and semi-professional footballer. He was previously the business owner of his personal training brand ‘The Mental Health PT’ but due to personal and business reasons, has rebranded and relaunched it as ‘Ultimate Body and Mind’. James first came on the pod in JCIP #183 where he discussed his journey into personal training and his struggle and recovery from a long-term eating disorder, which was triggered by three major life events.Since then, a massive amount has happened in James’s life, positively and negatively. For the former, he signed for non-league club Sheffield FC, only for the team to sign a professional goalkeeper the day before the transfer window shut and make him the number two goalkeeper at the last minute. As a 36-year-old, James needed to play minutes and had to leave the club and join another team as a result. For the latter, he has separated from his wife, which became messy and caused James severe mental health difficulties. During this separation, James discovered he was infertile because of a genetic condition he had called Klinefelter syndrome which, according to the NHS website, is characterised by boys being born with an extra X chromosome, so for James he has XXY, as opposed to XY for other men without the condition. It’s important to state that the X chromosome is not a "female" chromosome and is present in everyone. The presence of a Y chromosome denotes male sex. Symptoms of Klinefelter Syndrome in childhood can include: shyness and low self-confidence, problems with reading, writing, spelling and paying attention, mild dyslexia or dyspraxia, low energy levels, and difficulty socialising or expressing feelings. In teenagers, it is characterised by growing taller than expected. Finally in adulthood, as James tragically discovered, it is characterised by infertility as well as low sex drive, smaller testes and erection problems, which James bravely admits on the podcast but originally attributed it to his eating disorder.Kleinefelter Syndrome is also recognised as a Difference in Sexual Development (DSD). James also began suffering from cluster migraines because of the stress of his marriage breaking down, as well as a myriad of other events happening which we can’t discuss on this podcast. James’s uncle also tragically took his own life in 2024 after trying to take his own life previous to that three times.James says his uncle was let down by the system; the healthcare system for not providing adequate care, and the family court system as his uncle separated from his wife and claims he was parentally alienated from his step-children by his ex-wife.In Part 3, we discuss James’s business rebrand and why he did it, a deep dive into his marriage breakdown, his infertility diagnosis, drama in his football career and how he took himself from rock bottom to where he is now. Infertility is one of the most stigmatised experiences one can feel as a man for obvious reasons and we are very proud of James for the bravery he has shown on this podcast to discuss it so openly and courageously for all of the men who live with Klinefelter Syndrome in the UK, which is currently as high as 1 in 600 in this country.As always, #itsokaytoventYou can find out more about Ultimate Body & Mind here: http://www.ultimatebodyandmind.comYou can follow James on social media below: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theultimatebodyandmind/You can listen to Part 1 and Part 2 of James' journey below: Part 1: https://soundcloud.com/venthelpuk/jcip-183-james-roffey-part-1Part 2: https://soundcloud.com/venthelpuk/jcip-183-james-roffey-part-2Support Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvk

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In Part 4 of James Roffey’s journey, we discuss the grief he and his family went through from his uncle’s suicide and the decisions he had to take to make ends meet after losing his entire client base in Huddersfield after the marriage breakdown. As always, #itsokaytoventYou can find out more about Ultimate Body & Mind here: www.ultimatebodyandmind.comYou can follow James on social media below:Instagram: www.instagram.com/theultimatebodyandmind/You can listen to Part 1 and Part 2 of James' journey below:Part 1: https://soundcloud.com/venthelpuk/jcip-183-james-roffey-part-1Part 2: https://soundcloud.com/venthelpuk/jcip-183-james-roffey-part-2Support Us:Patreon: www.patreon.com/venthelpukGoFundMe: www.gofundme.com/f/help-vent-supp…ir-mental-healthMerchandise: www.redbubble.com/people/VentUK/shopMusic: @patawawa - Strange: www.youtube.com/watch?v=d70wfeJSEvk

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