The Kink Consultant

In part two of this special three-part solo series, I am breaking down exactly how to have the conversation with your partner about your kink.

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠http://www.amandadames.com/coaching

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, I continue the series on how to tell your partner you are kinky. In part two, I walk you through the actual conversation from start to finish. I explain how to set up the conversation at the right time, how to lead with curiosity before you share, and why asking for consent to share your fantasy changes everything. I also break down how to explain your kink in a way your partner can actually understand by naming the feeling underneath it, how to give them space to process, and why closing the conversation with gratitude and a future check-in date matters.

If you have been ready to have the conversation but are not sure what to actually say, this episode gives you the exact framework.

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Fantasy mapping: https://www.amandadames.com/fantasy-mapping-with-amanda-dames-opt-in

Speaking your desires with confidence: https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

In the first episode of a special three-part solo series, I am breaking down everything you need to know before you tell your partner you are kinky.

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠http://www.amandadames.com/coaching

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, I am launching a special solo series on how to tell your partner you are kinky. In part one, I focus on the preparation that needs to happen before the conversation even starts, because disclosing a kink and asking your partner to participate in it are two very different things.

I walk through the questions you need to ask yourself first, including why you want to tell them, where your kink falls on the spectrum of fantasy, nice to have, and need, and how to identify the feeling underneath the kink so you can explain it in a way your partner can actually understand. I also address how to prepare for a no, why highly stigmatized kinks require extra time and softness, and why releasing shame is the number one thing standing between you and the experiences you want.

If you have been hiding a kink, wondering how to bring it up, or scared of how your partner will react, this episode gives you the foundation you need before part two.

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Melanie Rose, star of Netflix's How to Build a Sex Room, joins the podcast to discuss sex room design, the history of sex toys, and how to create a pleasure space that works for your body and your relationship.

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠http://www.amandadames.com/coaching

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Melanie Rose, interior designer, artist, and host of Netflix's How to Build a Sex Room. They discuss how she went from designing kitchens and bathrooms to creating intimate sanctuaries for couples, why sex rooms do not have to look like dungeons, and how she approaches consultations with curiosity and zero judgment. They also discuss her favorite recommendations for spicing up a master bedroom, including the Tantra Chair, underbed restraint kits, and her curated website where everything has been personally tested or vetted.

If you have ever wanted to add a little spice to your bedroom, wondered how to store your kinky items tastefully, or been curious about what it is really like to design a sex room, this episode is for you.

Connect with Melanie Rose

https://www.melanieruthrose.com/

https://www.instagram.com/melanieruthrose/

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100013043105080

https://www.pinterest.com/melanieruthrose/

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

The hosts of The Kinky Cocktail Hour join the podcast to share their 24/7 D/S dynamic story, how they evolved their relationship over time, and why kink is the way they communicate.

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠http://www.amandadames.com/coaching

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Saffer Master and Lady Petra, hosts and producers of The Kinky Cocktail Hour podcast. They share their powerful origin story of coming out of 30-year marriages, finding each other on FetLife, and building a 24/7 dynamic. They explore how Lady Petra discovered her dominance after years of identifying as a service submissive, why they renew their vows every six months, and how checking your ego at the door is the key to a healthy dynamic. They also discuss the importance of daily debriefs, why kink is the way they communicate, and how they built their relationship through curiosity and connection.

If you have ever wondered how a dynamic can evolve over time or how to navigate a major shift in roles, this episode offers a beautiful example of what is possible when both partners stay open and committed.

Connect with Saffer Master and Lady Petra

https://tinyurl.com/Hard-Married

https://hardmarried.net/

https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/kinky-cocktail-hour/id1505110538

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Before you get into the episode this week, I wanted to let you know The Kink Bundle is BACK: https://kconsultant--domsubliving.thrivecart.com/kink-bundle/ 

30+ educators helping you level up your skill

Fitrix, personal trainer, and OnlyFans creator Carmilla Vess joins the podcast to discuss how kink and fitness intersect, why butt plugs can teach you to squat, and how to break the binge-restrict cycle. 

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠http://www.amandadames.com/coaching

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Carmilla Vess to explore the unexpected overlap between kink, fitness, and binge-eating. Carmilla shares her approach to fit domming, why she refuses to use food or working out as punishment, and how she builds sustainable programs for clients. They also dive into the binge-restrict cycle, why shame keeps people stuck, and how to love your body through the process instead of hating it into change.

If you have ever struggled with consistency in the gym, felt shame around your body, or wondered how kink and fitness actually connect, this episode offers practical tools and a refreshing perspective.

Connect with Carmilla Vess

https://www.instagram.com/fitfor.ofans/

https://www.instagram.com/xo_carmilla/

https://www.tiktok.com/@carmilla_vess

https://x.com/Carmilla_Vess

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Four real people, four very different kink journeys, and a whole lot of proof that listening to your kink can actually change your life. 

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠http://www.amandadames.com/coaching

For the 100th episode of The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with four former clients to share their real-life stories of kink, BDSM, relationships, desire, and self-discovery. From finding the courage to prioritize a long-suppressed kink, to discovering D/S as an adult virgin, navigating a relationship where partners have different interests, and learning how to bring kink into a long-term partnership, these stories show just how different a kink journey can look. There are no neat fairy-tale endings here. There are hard conversations, changing relationships, boundaries, experimentation, vulnerability, and plenty of growth.

If you've ever wondered what could happen when you stop ignoring what you want, this episode is for you. Hear how embracing kink helped these clients become more honest with themselves, communicate more openly, build stronger relationships, and feel more comfortable in their own skin. 

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Clinical sexologist Dr. Stacy Friedman joins the podcast to discuss how to talk to your partner about your deepest fantasies, navigate midlife desire, and advocate for your sexual health.

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠http://www.amandadames.com/coaching

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Dr. Stacy Friedman, clinical sexologist and intimacy coach, for a conversation on fantasies, desire, and midlife changes. Dr. Stacy shares her personal experience with menopause, hormone replacement therapy, why testosterone is crucial for female libido, and how to advocate for yourself with doctors. They also discuss erectile dysfunction, pegging and anal play shame, alternative lifestyles, and why you shouldn't just ChatGPT your relationship problems.

If you have ever struggled to share a fantasy, felt your desire shift in midlife, or wondered how to reconnect with your partner, this episode offers practical advice and compassionate guidance.

Head to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 off

Connect with Dr. Stacy Friedman 

https://drstacyfriedman.com/

https://www.instagram.com/drstacyfriedman/

https://www.youtube.com/@DrStacyFriedman

https://tiktok.com/drstacyfriedman

https://threads.com/drstacyfriedman

https://open.spotify.com/show/1Kgh4gvyxZOMjqQZyfRYnb?si=7340b3b967d843f0

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Emotional intimacy coach Allana Pratt joins the podcast to discuss psychedelics, kink, and coming home to your body through healing trauma and somatic integration work.

Join the Self-Dom Challenge: https://www.amandadames.com/offers/9fk5ewdh/checkout

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Allana Pratt, emotional intimacy coach, author, and host of the Intimate Conversations podcast. They explore the difference between the ego and the soul, why healing trauma leads to better kink and more authentic desire, and how to stop sabotaging relationships by coming home to your body. Allana also discusses her work with clients using low-dose psilocybin and cannabis to access the subconscious, integrate wounds, and create lasting change.

If you have ever felt stuck in patterns, disconnected from your body, or wondered how trauma affects your kink and relationships, this episode offers a compassionate and eye-opening conversation on healing and embodiment.

Head to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 off

Connect with Allana Pratt

https://allanapratt.com/

https://allanapratt.com/patreon/

https://www.instagram.com/allanapratt/

https://www.youtube.com/user/AlanaPratt

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠

https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Samia Mounts returns for a deep conversation on dismantling the patriarchy, polyamory, and how we can all break free from the systems that hold us back. 

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with returning guest Samia Mounts, voice actor and host of the Happy Slut podcast. They explore how patriarchy harms everyone, including men, and why dismantling it leads to better sex and deeper connection. They discuss the male loneliness epidemic, why women are not experiencing the same level of loneliness, and how men are cut off from their emotions from a young age.

They also explore the connection between polyamory, sexual autonomy, and feminism, why women are reclaiming their desire, and how competitive versus caretaker dynamics play out in society. If you have ever wondered how patriarchy affects your sex life and relationships, this episode offers a compelling and thought-provoking conversation.

Somatica Episode: I’m Moving For A Man?!? https://youtu.be/kkAWOiQ4UnM?si=ST0H1gxx6NV3UEyz

Head to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 off

Connect with Samia Mounts

https://www.samiamounts.com/

https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBkJT8ttJYCyIS8ig6gZ7pA

https://www.tiktok.com/@samia.mounts

https://www.samiamounts.com/podcast

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store

Licensed clinician and author Caroline Hood joins the podcast to discuss the truth about female desire, the impact of mental load, and how to navigate mismatched libido in relationships.

Book A Consult Call with Amanda ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consult⁠

This week on The Kink Consultant Podcast, Amanda sits down with Caroline Hood, a licensed clinician and author of the upcoming book Sex Begets Sex: Reclaiming Desire as an Act of Female Empowerment. Caroline shares practical advice on how to start conversations about intimacy without blame, why scheduled sex can actually be helpful, and how couples can rebuild connection after years of drifting apart. They also discuss the double standards women face around pleasure, the importance of deconditioning shame, and why oral sex should never have been categorized as foreplay.

If you have ever felt disconnected from your desire, struggled with mismatched libido in your relationship, or wanted to reclaim your sexual identity, this episode offers compassionate, actionable guidance.

Head to https://www.swinkation.com/signup and use code TKC50 for up to $400 off

Connect with Caroline Hood

https://www.desireinreallife.com/

https://www.instagram.com/desireinreallife/

https://substack.com/@desireinreallife

Connect with Amanda

⁠https://www.amandadames.com/⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Download the BDSM Checklist Here: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560⁠

Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/store