Happy new year, even if it’s not real! In this very special episode, Alice and Deanna discuss why they dislike punitive resolutions, whether consuming tubs of buttercream frosting is fine or problematic, whether you can fend off an attacker using tai chi, and (last but not least) Deanna’s epic response to a scandal in the social justice community.

It’s the holidays, in case you haven’t noticed! Deanna and Alice discuss how Christmas can sometimes be an epic bummer—and New Year’s, a great way to help you feel terrible about your life. Other topics covered include the simple joys of Wii bowling, the sanctioned child abuse in “It’s a Wonderful Life,” why you shouldn’t lock your knees, and the unspoken suffering of the merkin-deprived. You know. The usual.

In which Alice and Deanna discuss current events, why violence is blamed on the mentally ill, the difference between “depression” and “feeling bad because everything is legitimately terrible,” how they’ve cheered themselves up over the past week, and the weirdest possible way to respond to a compliment.

The debut episode of a new podcast from Alice Bradley and Deanna Zandt, covering the hilarious communal grounds we share in all being a little crazy. Literally awkward, figuratively unicorn.