The Love Agenda

Rejection, real-life dating, and how normal guys can start conversations that actually lead somewhere.

Rejection is the thing most guys fear,  my friend Eric - who coached men (yes, mostly engineers and attorneys) on style, approaching women, and starting conversations that get you a date.  We are gonna share the effective ways of approaching girls in public without any 'backlash', and how to get a girlfriend in the most regular places in daily life!

We get specific about real-world approach settings. And, good news - you don’t need magic lines! 

We talk through a practical mindset shift for dating in real life, and what it takes the edge off so the next approach feels 10x easier. We also unpack the reality that dating is a numbers game,  and how to make you come across more relaxed and emotionally fluent.

If you are a man and want approachable, actionable dating advice on HOW TO GET A GIRL'S NUMBER BY TALKING TO THEM IN PUBLIC, or a girl who is interested in a clearer view of what guys experience when they approach, this one is for you. 

📝 Take Relationship Assessments

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💖 Meet the host - Tea

🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

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Conflict doesn’t ruin most relationships, avoidance does. We sit down with Dr. Nancy Dome, best-selling author and communication expert, to get radically practical about how to handle hard conversations without shutting down, blowing up, or walking away the moment it gets uncomfortable. 

If you’ve ever replayed an argument for days, swallowed your feelings, or regretted what you said in the heat of the moment, this one gives you a better way.

We break down Nancy’s compassionate dialogue framework and the RIR protocol: recognize, interrupt, repair. 

Recognize is about naming what you feel and noticing the “cost of silence” on your body, your mood, and your choices. 

Interrupt is where you trade assumptions for clarity, using questions that reveal intent, impact, and meaning. 

Repair is the part most people skip: rebuilding trust, setting a clean boundary, creating a new agreement, or admitting that letting go is the healthiest repair available.

Nancy also shares her personal journey of being single most of her life and finding her husband at 48, plus what “not settling” looks like when you still want deep love and real partnership. 

We talk authenticity during the honeymoon phase, deal breakers, self-love, aging, and the exact sentence you can use this week to start a hard conversation with more compassion and less defensiveness.

Subscribe for more honest tools for modern love, share this with a friend who avoids conflict, and leave a review to help us bring more great content to you!

💌 Check out Nancy Dome

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Tea sits down with veteran matchmaker Xiao Li (Shelly), who has spent more than a decade helping Asian and Western singles meet, date, and build marriages across the Bay Area, LA, and New York.

Shelly breaks down the most common misconceptions Western men have about Asian women and the assumptions Asian women bring about Western men, especially around first-date physical boundaries, planning, and what “generous” is supposed to look like. 

We talk about what modern Asian women want now, and get real about the hard stuff people avoid like commitment timing, ghosting, saving face with family, and money habits that can turn into long-term conflict if you never name them.

If you’re dating outside your culture for the first time or you’re already in an intercultural relationship and want it to last, press play and take notes. 

🧧 Meet Xiaoli

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🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

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The fastest way to kill intimacy isn’t “bad sex” it’s the silence around it. Tea sits down with Amanda, a certified sexologist, intimacy coach, and former professional dominatrix, to talk about the part of dating and relationships most people overthink and under-discuss: sexual communication. If you’ve ever wanted to ask for something new but worried it would sound awkward, risky, or “too much,” this conversation gives you a clear path forward.

We get real about why sex is one of the hardest topics to talk about even in strong relationships, and how silence quietly grows into distance. With Amanda’s guidance, we share a practical way to bring up desires, handle boundaries, and protect trust while dating, married, or anywhere in between. 

📋 Amanda's Worksheet
☎️ Book A Call With Amanda 

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💖 Meet the host - Tea

🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

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🙋🏻‍♀️ Send in your relationship questions

☕️Take me out for a virtual coffee 

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Dating a single parent can feel like stepping into a world with invisible rules, until you realize the rules are just real life: kids, custody, work, and a limited amount of time. I’m joined by Pat Hankin, co-author of Field Guide for Single Parents, whose insights come from years of data and patterns gathered from a massive single parent community. We get honest about what makes dating a single mom or single dad different, and what “support” should actually look like when you’re not trying to become the savior of someone’s family system.

We talk through the practical problems that derail promising connections,  and how to make dating work. We also dig into online dating safety and why some single mothers avoid dating. 

If you’re considering a relationship with a single parent, you’ll leave with clearer boundaries, better questions to ask, and a calmer way to judge what’s actually a red flag versus normal parenting logistics. 

📕The Field Guide for Single Parents by Pat Hankin

📘The Book of Beautiful Questions by Warren Berger

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💖 Meet the host - Tea

🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

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Most relationship communication advice fixates on what to say, but the real breakthrough comes earlier than that: understanding what’s driving you. W

I sit down with Sandy Gerber, emotional intelligence expert, to unpack why certain people feel effortless to connect with and why other conversations seem to go off the rails no matter how “careful” your words are.

Sandy breaks down her model of successful communication,  and we talk about the fundamentals that shape everything from dating choices to everyday friction, and tips on how you can instantly reduce confusion, resentment, and mind reading.

We also get into nonverbal communication and first impressions. Sandy shares “connection cues” like mirroring posture and tone, watching where someone’s feet point, and how to look more approachable when you’re nervous. Then we move into emotional regulation tools for high-stakes moments.

We map out the necessary conversations and how to make conflict resolution cleaner and kinder. If you want healthier relationships, better communication skills, and more confident dating, this episode is for you.

Find Sandy Gerber 

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💖 Meet the host - Tea

🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

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🙋🏻‍♀️ Send in your relationship questions

☕️Take me out for a virtual coffee 

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If you’ve ever wondered why “being a good guy” still isn’t leading to the relationship you want, this conversation puts language to the problem and a roadmap to the solution. I sit down with Jason Lange, a men’s embodiment coach and certified No More Mr. Nice Guy coach, to talk about the quiet ways men lose themselves in dating: people-pleasing, hiding desire, avoiding tension, and trying to earn love by staying “easy” instead of being real.

We break down Nice Guy Syndrome, the “man box” pressure to be invulnerable, and why so many men live from the neck up, then feel confused when partners ask for emotional presence. You’ll hear the difference between domination and relational leadership, plus a surprisingly useful tango metaphor for what attunement actually looks like.

We also get practical about modern dating dynamics: how clear planning builds trust, why emotional leadership matters (especially around defining the relationship), and how men’s groups create the brotherhood, accountability, and nervous system resilience that makes intimacy easier at home. 

If you want a healthier form of masculinity that includes both strength and heart, this one is for you. It is also a great episode for women to understand the challenges men face in dating!

Find Jason here

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Support the show

💖 Meet the host - Tea

🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

☀️Apply to be a guest

🙋🏻‍♀️ Send in your relationship questions

☕️Take me out for a virtual coffee 

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I sit down with Ed, a Berkeley and Stanford trained engineer who had a startup exit ($8 Billion project), retired early, and is now rebuilding love after a long marriage while staying on great terms with his ex-wife. He is thoughtful, active, and honest about what it is like to re-enter online dating in midlife with real intention.

We get into the stuff people usually avoid: when chemistry turns physical fast, how sex boundaries can protect trust, and why rushing into sex often clouds judgment for both men and women. We also talk about the modern breakup problem, ghosting and ending relationships through text, and how conflict avoidance shows up as avoidant attachment behaviors. We discuss self-awareness, the perfect label, anxious attachment and communications.

Ed also shares the most surprising tools he is using right now: an AI dating coach and an attachment-focused AI journaling app that helped him uncover deeper patterns through Internal Family Systems style prompts. 

We close with practical relationship advice. If you want more clarity in dating after divorce, better communication, and stronger emotional intelligence, you will get a lot from this conversation.

Resources:

📗 Eight Dates by John Gottman

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💖 Meet the host - Tea

🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

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Today, I am joined by Dara Rahill, a former top-ranked premium matchmaker at the country's largest matchmaking platform, and now the founder of Dara Rae Matchmaking, to reveal what actually predicts a healthy long-term relationship when you look beyond photos, height filters, and perfect-on-paper stats. 

We dig into the behind-the-scenes reality of modern dating:  “checklists”, dating profiles, and how dating app culture amplifies snap judgments. 

Dara explains how real compatibility is assessed, plus the intuitive “art” a matchmaker develops after interviewing thousands of singles. We also unpack why even highly sought-after people sometimes choose high-end matchmaking services.

One of the most eye-opening parts is who can be hardest to match and why. We also challenge the myth of instant chemistry, exploring how attraction can grow through repeated exposure.

If you’re tired of guessing, lower-stakes clarity starts here. Great episode for both men and women.

🎀 Dara Rae Matchmaking

🫶 Dara Rae Instagram

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💖 Meet the host - Tea

🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

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Dating a Bay Area engineer can look perfect on paper… but feel unexpectedly lonely in real life.

In this episode, we get brutally honest about what it’s actually like dating engineers in Silicon Valley—the parts that feel safe and stable, and the parts that quietly hurt. Violina is back, and we’re sharing real stories, unpacking patterns we kept running into, and reflecting on the moments that led to some big realizations.

We also talk about the green flags—what draws so many people to engineers in the first place—and why those same traits can sometimes create disconnect in relationships.

This is about understanding what works, what doesn’t, and what actually matters in the long run. If you’ve ever felt like you’re dating someone who tries to debug emotions instead of actually feeling them, this conversation will hit home.

Whether you’re dating in the Bay Area, seeing a software engineer, or you are an engineer wanting to understand how this dynamic can land, this episode offers clarity—and some practical questions you’ll wish you had asked earlier.

Share your thoughts, or send in questions📝

Support the show

💖 Meet the host - Tea

🎯 The mission and ecosystem of The Love Agenda

☀️Apply to be a guest

🙋🏻‍♀️ Send in your relationship questions

☕️Take me out for a virtual coffee 

✨Social Media