April O'Neill: I'm going to find an apartment. I have an idea we're going to be here for a long time.

Leonardo: An apartment?

Michaelangelo: Do they have apartments in Japan?

Raphael: Do I look like a real estate agent?

Leonardo: What about condos?

[last lines]

Splinter: Were you seen?

Leonardo: Of course not, Master Splinter.

Donatello: We practiced Ninja.

Michaelangelo: [off camera] The art of invisibility.

[appears from behind Raph]

Splinter: [holds up the New York Post, with a front page picture of the turtles on stage, with the headline "Ninja Rap is Born!"] Practice harder.

[the turtles groan]

Splinter: Ten flips, now! And remember:

[quoting the song played at the show]

Splinter: "Go Ninja, go Ninja, go!" I made another funny!

[laughs]

[last lines]

Leonardo: We were awesome!

Michaelangelo: Bodacious!

Raphael: Bitchin'!

Donatello: Uh...

Michaelangelo: Gnarly!

Leonardo: Radical!

Raphael: Totally tubular, dude!

Michaelangelo: Wicked!

Leonardo: Hellacious!

Donatello: Uh, mega...

[Splinter clears his throat, the Turtles clam up]

Splinter: I have always liked... Cowabunga.

Leonardo, Michaelangelo, Raphael, Donatello: COWABUNGA!

Splinter: [laughs] I made a funny!

Thomas: [noticing a container in Hans' trailer] Is that what we rubbed on ourselves?

Hans, trolljegeren: Yes.

Thomas: What is it?

Hans, trolljegeren: Concentrated troll stench. A mixture of all the crap you can squeeze out of a troll.

Rocco Piedra: Marky Einstein?

Rocco Piedra: The little guy?

Rocco Piedra: He's not even a wrestler!

Rocco Piedra: Isn't he gay?

Sandy Gold Piedra: No daddy.

Sandy Gold Piedra: He's not gay, he's Jewish.

Louise Banks: Despite knowing the journey... and where it leads... I embrace it... and I welcome every moment of it.

Gary King: How is, uh...

Peter Page: Vanessa.

Gary King: No. Your wife.

Peter Page: Vanessa.

Gary King: Yeah. How's she?

Peter Page: She's good.

Gary King: Have you had sex yet?

Peter Page: We have two children.

Gary King: Ooh twice! Get you, fuck machine.

Nicholas Angel: All right, what about this guy? Ask yourself, why has he got his hat pulled down like that?

Danny Butterman: He's fuck-ugly.

Nicholas Angel: Or, he doesn't want you to see his face.

Danny Butterman: 'Cause he's fuck-ugly.

Ed: Do you want your messages?

Shaun: What?

Ed: Well, your mum rang about you going around tomorrow night, and then Liz rang about the two of you eating out tonight, and then your mum rang back to see if I wanted to eat her out tonight.

Shaun: *What*?

Ulysses Everett McGill: Damn! We're in a tight spot!