For most of my life, I thought my problem was that people misunderstood me.

What I finally realized is that I was so afraid of being misunderstood that I never really let anyone know me in the first place.

In this episode, I share stories I've never told publicly before. From a childhood moment that shaped the way I viewed sensitivity, to the realization that I accidentally passed some of my own wounds on to my oldest son. We talk about strength, vulnerability, creativity, self-expression, fear, and the armor we build to protect ourselves from getting hurt.

This isn't an episode about having all the answers. It's about what happens when you stop pretending to be the toughest person in the room and start telling the truth.

There are tears, a few laughs, a tornado siren cameo, and probably more honesty than I intended when I hit record.

If you've ever felt misunderstood, overlooked, difficult to categorize, or like you've spent your life trying to be who everyone else needed you to be, this one's for you.

Stay human, weirdos.

Today at church they handed out white flags as a symbol of surrender.

And if I’m being honest… part of me recoiled a little.

Because surrender feels like a dirty word in our culture. We’ll surrender to stress, distraction, anxiety, work, dopamine, and emotional chaos without even noticing it… but surrender to peace, trust, or faith? Suddenly that feels dangerous.

In this episode, I talk about the realization that maybe I’ve been waiting for all the answers before fully walking my path. The problem is, life doesn’t usually work that way. Maybe clarity doesn’t come before movement. Maybe movement creates clarity.

We dive into the deeper meaning of metanoia, not just as repentance, but as a transformation of mind. A reorientation. A shift in the way we see ourselves, life, faith, and the path in front of us.

I also talk honestly about realizing I’ve been too hard on myself. I’ve already written and published a book, started a second, launched a podcast, and begun putting my voice into the world. Maybe I wasn’t standing still. Maybe I was just expecting myself to already be at the destination.

This episode is about surrender, certainty, control, faith, and learning that sometimes the answers show up while we’re walking the path… not before we take the first step.

Sometimes kids don’t just hear stories… they carry them.

In this episode of The Messy Middle, I talk about watching Easton absorb Peter Parker’s story in a way that caught me completely off guard, and how that realization connected to a social media trend that left me with mixed emotions.

This isn’t a rant about parenting or social media. It’s a reflection on emotional weight, gratitude, childhood, and the invisible things kids absorb from the adults around them.

We talk about:
• Why children feel stories before they fully understand them
• The difference between teaching gratitude and transferring emotional burden
• Emotional “weather” inside families
• Why timing matters when it comes to heavier truths
• Letting kids stay kids a little while longer

No dramatic conclusions. Just an honest conversation from somewhere in the messy middle of parenting, healing, and trying to do better than the generations before us.

Because a child can appreciate your sacrifices… without carrying your pain.

What happens when a man stops shape-shifting for survival?

In this episode of The Messy Middle, Tyler talks about fear loops, grief, emotional masking, self-forgivness, and the emotional weather of every room you walk into.

This isn't a polished self-help episode. It's an honest conversation about what happens when survival patterns stop protecting you and start suffocationg you. From watered down versions of himself, to fear of being truly seen, to learning that healing isn't perfection but accountability and honesty, this episode digs into the uncomfortable middle ground between who you had to become... and who you actually are.

There's talk of fatherhood, faith, failure, emotional survival, and the difficult process of letting go of old identities without full knowing what comes next.

Sometimes the hardest thing a person can do is stop performing.

Welcome to The Messy Middle

"Do you want to be healed?"

That question from the Gospel of John isn't as simple as it sounds.

Because healing doesn't just change your situation...it asks you to let go of the identity you built around it.

In this episode, we brak down why that's so hard, how we unknowingly stay stuck, and what it actually means to "turn the other cheek" without losing yourself.

I've spent the last year trying to figure out how to explain this...and it turns out that it's not complicated-it just takes reps. This episode is about the patterns we all run, how they keep us stuck, and what it looks like to finally start interrupting them in real time. No perfection. Just awareness.

This is where it changed. Not all at once. Not dramatically. Just a moment where I stopped ignoring myself and started paying attention.

Nothing in my life looked different from the outside--same job, same house, same responsibilities.

But something shifted in how I showed up.

This isn't about having it all figured out. It's about what happens when you finally hear yourself...and don't ignore it.