The Middle-Aged Candy Store

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering. 

In this episode, Dr. Sex dispenses marital advice to some wizards, and the Vatican joins the AI craze by selecting a very unusual pope. Meanwhile in the store, the Scrap Metal Woman and her sister visit Karen and help her manage her new investor.

• Ask Dr. Sex: Wizard Problems was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip and performed by Tony Culverwell, Donnie Febbleston, and Megan Liley, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• We can forgive that for you wholesale, or, PopeGPT was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip and performed by Donnie Febbleson, Tony Culverwell, and Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Karen Loomer, Megan Liley, and Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston. 
• All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons Zero and can be found on freesound.org. Special thanks to: 

• S: Zap.flac by jnr hacksaw | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Heavy Metal Impact by magnuswaker | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: DullThud.wav by TriqyStudio | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Melee Weapon hit with male moan & body fall by Paul368 | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Footsteps outdoors gravel.wav by jedg | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Crowd/Mob/Riot Noise (Voices Only) - 14 people, 2 minutes HENRY VI by FillMat | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Kicking_Dumpster.wav by kmyers1316 | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: System Notification by UNIVERSFIELD | License: Attribution 4.0
• S: Chatton.mp3 by Kastenfrosch | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Keyboard Typing 1 (HHKB, Topre) by grcekh | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Crowd gasp.wav by RadioCounseling | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Smoke_Machine_Blast_Long.wav by Annesy | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Traditional Church Organ Music [Florence - Italy] 03 by Skjor1 | License: Creative Commons 0

• Sound design by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Cover art by Amanda Matalanis. 

The Middle-Aged Candy Store will return for Season 5.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering. 

In this episode, we hear the tale Gail Gomish, a good woman of Ergu whose devotion to the gods and ownership of a Prius is not enough to save her from alien abduction. Meanwhile in the store, Karen’s accountant, Coolsworth, provides some devastating news about the store’s latest employee - but not before the store suffers dire consequences.

• The Epics of Gail Gomish, Parts One and Two, were written by Donnie Febbleston, performed by Carol McLeod and Donnie Febbleston, and produced by Donnie Febbleston.
• Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Karen Loomer, Megan Liley, and Donnie Febbleston.
• Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston. 
• All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons Zero and can be found on freesound.org. Special thanks to: 
• S: Magic Stars Retro Sparkle by smokinghotdog | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Lighter flicker on and off.WAV by thomasanthony321 | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Crowd Booing 3.mp3 by mrrap4food | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Comedy FX by Evil_Ear_Recordings | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: [SFX] custom white noise by waveplaySFX | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: sweep.mp3 by PaperAirplaneBoy | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Synth sweep by dippy_ | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: toaster_down 01.wav by ShadowSilhouette | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Relaxing Beach Waves by ClubsHeartsSpadesDiamonds | License: Creative Commons 0
• Sound design by Donnie Febbleston.
• Cover art by Amanda Matalanis. 

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering. 

In this episode, Canada’s top politicians make some very poor decisions at the race track, and the Geographical Rage Enablement Action Team outlines some important updates. Meanwhile in the candy store, Crystal Ball and Monkey Paw help out our favourite ant-controlled Victorian orphans.

• The Canadian Pension Plan on Lady Luck to Win in the Ninth was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, performed by Donnie Febbleston, Megan Liley, and Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Geographical Enragement Cavalcade was written, performed, and produced by Donnie Febbleston.
• Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Megan Liley, Linda Febbleston, Donnie Febbleston, and Tony Culverwell.
• Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston. 
• All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons Zero and can be found on freesound.org. Special thanks to: 
• S: Two Kazoo Fanfare.wav by pel2na | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Light key jingling by redpanda69 | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Crowd Screaming by DigestContent | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: slaps, face, foley, 10.flac by TRP | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: crowd ext large cheering parade overhead6 Montreal, Canada.flac by kyles | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Clean and Pompous Fanfare Trumpet.mp3 by joepayne | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Wild Horses Galopp by D4XX | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Heathers Gunshot Effect2.wav by okieactor | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: crowd ext park medium activity after outdoor show quebecois voices steps on beer cans with distant city skyline Montreal, Canada.flac by kyles | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: synth banjo by SoundsExciting | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: R02-11-Hip Hip Hooray.wav by craigsmith | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Ghost sigh2.wav by HorrorAudio | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Gong.aif by DiArchangeli | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Bottle Slide Wood_1-2.aif by lucaslara | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: eery ambience.aif by plamdi1 | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: horror Ghost low-pitched sound.wav by HaraldDeLuca | License: Creative Commons 0
• street small town or city light throaty traffic birds table saw spanish voices Saravena, Colombia 2016.flac by kyles -- https://freesound.org/s/405083/ -- License: Creative Commons 0
• Crows, park, urban, Stratford, 10.mp3 by TRP -- https://freesound.org/s/576476/ -- License: Creative Commons 0Sound design by Megan Liley.
• Cover art by Amanda Matalanis. 

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering.

In this episode, we take in another episode of the hit series, “Vehicles Abandoned in a Field”, learning the sad story of Arthur Glendennis and his Bricklin SV-1, and hear a cautionary tale on the dangers of time travel. Meanwhile in the store, Karen is a guest on her favourite morning radio show, and Medusa has an unfortunate run-in with a coworker’s spouse during a visit from Dave and Avialannia.

• Vehicles Abandoned in a Field was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, performed by Tony Culverwell, Donnie Febbleston, Megan Liley, and Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Jasmine’s Time Travel was written by Megan Liley, performed by Francois Schneider, with additional voices by The Gathering, and produced by Megan Liley.
• Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Karen Loomer, Donnie Febbleston, Tony Culverwell, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and Adam Bailey.
• Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston.
• All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons Zero. Special thanks to:
• S: Typing Real.wav by Kevinflo 
• S: Shovel_Pick_Up.aif by crcavol 
• S: 1125coughing.wav by sagetyrtle 
• S: 20170101 Slide Glass Door 02 by kijjaz
• S: teapot and tea cup.wav by rocuma 
• S: Kettle by FlashTrauma 
• S: 120621 Barn door interior, bangs, rattles BLYTH.flac by TRP 
• S: Rustling foliage.WAV by DDT197 
• S: Walking Footsteps on Wood by sillygrizzlies 
• S: traditionnal blacksmith by bruno.auzet
• S: Country Night Ambiance by forfie
• S: Crazy Bat by NicknameLarry
• S: Electro_Static.flac by TreyVZ 
• S: Anniversary Vintage Music Box by f-r-a-g-i-l-e 
• S: The Dramatic Music.wav by xtrgamr
• S: Small city outskirts at night, near prairie meadow with cricket, road traffic hum, dog barking far away in Santa Elena by felix.blume 
• S: taratata.wav by milton.
• Sound design by Megan Liley.
• Cover art by Amanda Matalanis.

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering. 

In this episode, intrepid reporter Stacey brings us harrowing footage of a war between ants and flies, and we hear the exciting trailer for POLICEBOT, the new series from the creators of Pizza Cops. Meanwhile in the candy store, Karen meets diversity consultants Cindy and Cindy, and finds out that they may not be what they seem.

• Stacey Reporting Live was written by Tony Culverwell, performed by Amanda Matalanis, Megan Liley, and Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and produced by Tony Culverwell.
• All Robocops are Bastards was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, performed by Megan Liley, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, Donnie Febbleston, and Tony Culverwell, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Megan Liley, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and Karen Loomer.
• Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston. 
• All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons Zero and can be found on freesound.org. Special thanks to: 
• tuben - cheesy morning news tune
• 130221 - ant sound
• meliaroger - anmlinsect_br serrinha do alambari ants walking on contact mics in a nest loudness 16_melia-roger_contacts
• pfranzen - dropping-the-mic
• brunoauzet - drone-dji
• lukzus - drone multicopter flyby
• magnuswalker for Heavy Metal Impact
• tomwilkinson for metallic clang
• V-ktor for large explosion 2
• Harrisando for Bonk.wav
• TobiasKosmos for DogYelp.wav
• thaigaudio for Lottie small dog growling barking and playing 4
• nicholaswyoung2 for 80’s blender (water + ice)
• Brentamo for city_street.wave
• zagi2 for ambush.wave
• SamsterBirdies for scrap metal dropping
• belanhud for Ragun Zap 1
• tgerginov for Magic
• Sound design by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Cover art by Amanda Matalanis. 

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering. 

In this episode, the famous Inspector Monocle visits the historic manor, High Dudgeon, to solve the foul murder of one Tom Hardhands. An organizing meeting for the Slobbering Vandals support group discusses problems with their silent auction as slobbering and breakage unfolds but just as the space station astronaut finishes his update to the group, the narrator describes a violent incursion of scheming emus, dolphin hair dryer salesmen and yawning gigglers. Meanwhile in the store, Karen encounters the fierce Gorak in her quest for revenge against the Candy Salesman.

Lady Aspartame’s Lover was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, performed by Michael Giel, Tony Culverwell, Rachel Perry, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, Donnie Febbleston, and Karen Loomer, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip. Incidental music by Johannes Sebastian Bach, performed by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip. 

Slobbering Vandal Support Group was written by Donnie Febbleston, performed by Megan Liley, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, Karen Loomer, Tony Culverwell, and Donnie Febbleston, and produced by Donnie Febbleston.

Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Karen Loomer and Donnie Febbleston.

Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston. 

All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons Zero and can be found on freesound.org. Special thanks to: 

• Dolphin Noise-.wav by jfournier18
• Lots of Morse Code by Buss1000
• Outro Quindar Tone by scy.wav
• hair dryer.wav by loullipop
• Cartoon Chicken Loud Single Screaming Squawk sound effect by Mastersoundboy2005
• Break Mirror002.wav by Tetrisrocker
• Indoor adult murmur, couple.wav by SpliceSound
• handcuffs_taken_out_and_closed.wav by daboy291
• Bell rings timidly.wav by Fenodyrie
• dorm door opening.wav by pagancow

Sound design by Donnie Febbleston.

Cover art by Amanda Matalanis. 

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering. 

In this episode, a cat owner learns why you don’t actually want to be able to hear what your cat has to say, and we learn the history of some unfortunate public art with Sister Eileen the Monotonous and Tiresome. Meanwhile in the candy store, Karen and Medusa meet Coolsworth, accountant extra-ordinaire, who describes his accounting school basketball triumphs over an anthropomorphic duck.

• The Cat Experiment was written by Donnie Febbleston, performed by Tony Culverwell, Donnie Febbleston, and Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and produced by Donnie Febbleston.
• Frescoes That Have Aged Poorly was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, performed by Megan Liley, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Karen Loomer, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and Donnie Febbleston.
• Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston. 
• Sound design by Tony Culverwell.
• Cover art by Amanda Matalanis. 
• All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons and can be found on freesound.org.
• Sound credits:
• S: Für Elise Music Box.mp3 by UltraGSV
• bplayers for door-open-close-with-bell
• nomiqbomi for uh-oh
• icsp for drop-of-water
• prime45 for flute-mix
• aceinet for d-to-slow-you
• maodin204 for fireworks-explosion-1
• maodin204 for fireworks-explosion-2
• maodin204 for fireworks-explosion-3
• visionear for explosion-fireworks-processed-ed-larez-vsnr
• pax11 for e_pop-120bpm
• vanyamba for fm-sitar-waveform-stereo-c2
• csaszi for pigeons_fly-away_-wing-flaps_csg
• mickeythesoundcollector2023 for concert-crowd-cheering
• soundslikeyukon for boys-shooting-hoops-on-wood-floor
• vhschool2019 for basketball-swish
• tgerginov for wind-woosh
• bezaard for the-roland-d-50s-sitar-test
• S: Car driving ambience by priesjensen
• S: New York Jazz Loop by FoolBoyMedia | License: Attribution NonCommercial 4.0
• S: British Television Programme.wav by a.transmission

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering. 

In this episode, we learn the thrilling story behind an abandoned Vauxhall, and protect our eternal souls by attending Monster Truck Latin Mass. Meanwhile in the candy store, Karen invokes a genie to help her with her recruitment problems, and interviews some unlikely prospective employees.

Vehicles Abandoned in a Field: The Vauxhall  was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, performed by Tony Culverwell, Megan Liley, Donnie Febbleston, Karen Loomer, and Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.

Monster Truck Latin Mass was written, performed, and produced by Donnie Febbleston. 

Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Karen Loomer, Tony Culverwell, Megan Liley, and Linda Febbleston. 

Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston. 

All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons Zero and can be found on freesound.org. Special thanks to: 

• s-cheremisinov for cinematic-rise-and-hit_02
• devern for cinematic-build
• davejf for melody-loop
• smokinghotdog for magic-stars-retro-sparkle
• pjcohen for udustereoloop
• szegvari for dark-nord-cold-thriller-horror-voices-ambient-amb-myst-cinematic-surround
• crimeraaa for keyboard
• aboalgamer for mouse-click-sound-effect
• kyles for street small town or city light throaty traffic birds table saw spanish voices saravena colombia
• trp for crows park urban stratford 10
• Volvion for latin-cathedral
• 1969 Dodge Charger Car Horn by truss88
• girl gigle by ienba
• record scratch by luffy
• birds in the woods by berwitz
• barrypirro for irish-jig
• dilsun for old_truck_metal_squeaks-creaks-rattle-impact_door_hollow_open_close_impact
• morganpurkis for single-gunshot-52
• josephlarralde for metal-cupboard-door
• wanaki for car-horn
• rodzuz for slap-in-the-face

Sound design by Tony Culverwell.

Cover art by Amanda Matalanis. 

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering.

In this episode, Murderous Meg makes new friends at a carnival, and Pizzabot takes an ethical stand against the police state. Meanwhile in the candy store, Karen does some very unethical market research.

• Murderous Meg: The Carnival was written by Donnie Febbleston, performed by Megan Liley, Donnie Febbleston, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, Karen Loomer, and Tony Culverwell, and produced by Donnie Febbleston.
• Robot Contempt of Court was written by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, performed by Donnie Febbleston, Tony Culverwell, Karen Loomer, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, and Megan Liley, and produced by Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.
• Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Karen Loomer and Donnie Febbleston.
• Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston.
• All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons and can be found on freesound.org. Full sound effect credits are available here.
• Sound design by Megan Liley.
• Cover art by Amanda Matalanis.

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to the Middle Aged Candy Store, produced by The Gathering.

in this episode, a yoga class finds an unlikely new guru in “I’m Here to Expose my Zenicles”, and we catch a fan favourite episode of the world’s most off-topic sitcom, “I Digress”. Meanwhile in the candy store, the European Ladies of Indeterminate Nationality make a stunning revelation about Skip’s true nature, and Medusa has a run-in with a coworker’s spouse.

Credits:

i’m Here to Expose My Zenicles written by Tony Culverwell and Donnie Febbleston, performed by Karen Loomer, Kristin Mueller-Heaslip, Megan Liley, Tony Culverwell, and Donnie Febbleston, and produced by Tony Culverwell.

I Digress written by Donnie Febbleston, performed by Donnie Febbleston, Linda Febbleston, Tony Culverwell, and Karen Loomer, and produced by Donnie Febbleston.

Intro and interstitial segments written by The Gathering and performed by Karen Loomer, Megan Liley, Michael Giel, and Kristin Mueller-Heaslip.

Theme music by Donnie Febbleston and performed by Donnie and Linda Febbleston.

All sound effects are licenced under Creative Commons Zero and can be found on freesound.org. Special thanks to:

• S: dorm door opening.wav by pagancow | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Chillidos_Animal.wav by nmarciniegasm | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: HAMMER_1.wav by pablodavilla | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: 120827 Raccoon, bark, screech, yelp, squeal, backyard, Toronto.wav by TRP | License: Creative Commons 0
• S: Gas_Spray_Pressure_Various.wav by LamaMakesMusic | License: Creative Commons 0
• sound: street-small-town-or-city-light-throaty-traffic-birds-table-saw-spanish-voices-saravena-colombia-2016 creator: kylessound:
• crows-park-urban-stratford-10; creator: trp
• door-open-close-with-bell creator: bplayers
• soundeffects4You
• Jay Frosting
• Ehohnhke
• zgump for sitar-01
• gsb1039 for egyptian-discovery
• thegreeneyedghost for wooden_frog_ornament_1

Sound design by Megan Liley.

Cover art by Amanda Matalanis.

Podcasts appear every first and third Tuesday of the month.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.