We are used to label people and situations too fast and too easily. When we lose we don't necessarily fail. 

Do the following and, more often than not, you'll win.

Convincing is not pushing. Convincing is not reiterating the message. Convincing is, first of all, getting out of your comfort zone and find a common ground. From there, by being true to yourself, you can start convincing. 

You need to have objectives to lead a team or yourself. Beware of constant goal stretching and appreciate easy wins as a way to reach higher and more challenging goals.