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Divorce is never just about legal proceedings—it’s an emotional battlefield. In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Robert Goldman, a seasoned attorney-turned-psychologist specializing in forensic evaluations, child custody cases, and court-ordered therapy. We dive into the complexities of the legal system, parental accountability, and how to manage expectations when seeking justice in court.

We also discuss the emotional toll of high-conflict divorces, the role of parental influence on children, and the healing journey post-divorce. Dr. Goldman offers his expert insights on narcissistic abuse, the power of resiliency, and why some people struggle to move forward while others thrive.

Episode Highlights:

[00:02] - Introducing Dr. Robert Goldman and his unique background in law and psychology.
[02:21] - Holding an ex-spouse accountable—what happens when court orders aren’t followed?
[03:25] - Managing expectations in the legal system and why “justice” isn’t always what people think.
[04:59] - How should a targeted parent respond when children are manipulated against them?
[06:14] - The danger of labels like "manipulation" and "narcissistic abuse"—why critical thinking is key.
[10:21] - The emotional toll of family court and why many feel re-traumatized.
[15:24] - Why even "amicable" divorces can feel like moral violations and trigger intense emotions.
[22:47] - Can trauma from a divorce physically change your brain? Dr. Goldman explains the science behind it.
[32:30] - How do you prove harassment in court? The importance of unbiased evidence.
[37:00] - The shifting role of fathers in custody battles—what changed since the 70s?
[41:57] - The power of healing: why some choose growth and others stay stuck.
[44:55] - Finding meaning in suffering—how trauma can lead to personal transformation.

Links & Resources:

📞 Contact Dr. Robert Goldman: 631-499-7500
 📖 Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl – A must-read on resilience and finding purpose in suffering

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Life has a way of bringing people into our world at exactly the right time. In this episode, I open up about a powerful connection that played a huge role in my healing journey during and after my divorce. I share how meeting someone who truly saw and valued me helped me break free from people-pleasing tendencies, rebuild my self-worth, and experience emotional safety in ways I never had before. This wasn’t just about romance—it was about recognizing my own strength, understanding my emotional patterns, and learning to stand fully in my power.

I also dive into the deep work of healing while still experiencing pain, balancing masculine and feminine energies, and trusting that God was guiding me through every challenge. If you've ever felt stuck in heartbreak or questioned if healing is even possible, this episode is for you. Let’s talk about resilience, growth, and the life-changing impact of genuine connection.

Episode Highlights:

[00:02] - Welcome & introduction: A glimpse into my healing journey.
[03:15] - How deep emotional pain led me to an unexpected, healing connection.
[07:42] - Breaking free from people-pleasing & learning to use my voice.
[11:28] - The balance of masculine & feminine energy in relationships.
[15:00] - Trusting God's plan through pain & transformation.
[19:25] - Embracing self-care, self-love, and the power of inner work.
[23:48] - Final thoughts: How to start prioritizing yourself and your healing.

Links & Resources:

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Hey everyone, welcome back to The Music of Life! I'm Caryn Portnoy, and today’s episode is a deeply personal one. I’ve talked a lot about my divorce in past episodes, but now, I feel like I’ve turned a corner. It’s time to focus on healing, hope, and the journey forward. My healing process wasn’t quick—it took over two years—but I made it through, and I want to share what helped me move from heartbreak to a place of inner peace.

In this episode, I’m opening up about the rituals and practices that helped me, from spiritual awakenings and prayer to meditation and self-care. I also share the unexpected connection I made online that brought love and companionship during my healing process—and the valuable lessons that relationship taught me. If you’re navigating loss, heartbreak, or major life changes, this episode is for you. Healing is possible, and I’m here to remind you that blue skies are ahead.

Episode Highlights:

[0:00] – The moment I knew I was ready to stop talking about my divorce and start focusing on healing.

[5:45] – The three things I refused to let my ex take from me.

[9:30] – My weekly ritual baths and how they became a sanctuary for emotional release and prayer.

[14:20] – How an unexpected online connection turned into a deep and meaningful relationship.

[22:40] – The slip-up that could’ve ended everything—but instead brought us closer.

[30:15] – The devastating breakup and how I navigated the pain of losing someone I deeply cared for.

[35:50] – My personal "rebirth" moment at a Florida beach and how it symbolized the end of one chapter and the beginning of another.

[38:30] – Where I am now, what healing looks like today, and my hopes for the future.

Links & Resources:

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Co-parenting with a narcissist is not just difficult—it’s a relentless, exhausting battle that impacts every part of your life, especially your children. In this episode, I relive the realities of narcissistic co-parenting, from parent alienation to emotional and legal abuse. I share my own experiences, highlight expert insights, and include powerful clips from professionals like Dr. Ramani and Dr. Christine Marie Cocciola. These discussions shed light on how narcissists manipulate children, weaponize the legal system, and leave the targeted parent feeling powerless.

If you've ever felt like you're constantly in survival mode, battling high cortisol levels, chronic fatigue, and the never-ending emotional and financial abuse that comes with co-parenting with a narcissist, this episode is for you. I also share clips from a registered psych nurse who explains the physical toll of narcissistic abuse, as well as a powerful message for single moms who feel trapped in this cycle. Stay tuned because I promise—you’re not alone, and there is hope.

Episode Highlights:

[00:06] - Welcome to the episode and why this topic is so important.
[02:07] - A powerful insight from Dr. Ramani on why mistreating a co-parent is abuse.
[03:43] - The heartbreaking reality of parent alienation and how it impacts children.
[06:32] - A registered psych nurse explains the physical effects of narcissistic abuse.
[08:53] - The harsh reality of counter-parenting and why narcissists refuse to co-parent.
[09:55] - The common experiences of narcissistic abuse survivors and a message of hope.

Links & Resources:

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In this episode, I open up about my own experience with legal abuse during my divorce. This is a story about resilience, empowerment, and discovering the strength to rise above unimaginable challenges. I share what legal abuse looks like, how it impacts those of us who endure it, and why community and healing are so essential. I’m here to remind you that no matter how overwhelming it may feel, you’re not alone, and you are stronger than you realize.

Episode Highlights:
[00:06] - Reflecting on my experience attending Podfest and being inspired by a creative, supportive podcasting community.
[01:30] - A discussion on legal abuse, from stalling court proceedings to financial manipulation.
[05:45] - The emotional toll of my journey and how I refused to let it define me.
[08:10] - The healing process: how I found the strength to rise above my circumstances and embrace a new chapter.
[10:30] - A heartfelt message of hope and encouragement for listeners enduring similar struggles.

Links & Resources:

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Hi everyone, it’s Caryn, and welcome back to The Music of Life! This week, I’m diving into a deeply personal and eye-opening episode about the subtle—and not-so-subtle—ways financial control and manipulation can manifest during a divorce. I’ll share the bizarre story of how toilet paper became a symbol of power in my marriage, along with the emotional and financial toll it took on me. From hoarded household goods to disrupted financial agreements, this episode is all about resilience and reclaiming control when everything feels stacked against you.

If you've ever felt like you were being played in ways you couldn't have imagined, or if you're simply curious about the emotional layers that come with financial independence, this episode is a must-listen. It’s raw, it’s real, and hopefully, it will give you some insight into navigating similar struggles with grace and strength.

Episode Highlights:

[0:06] - Kicking off the episode with a vivid dream and its surprising connection to real-life challenges.
 [2:45] - How toilet paper turned into a bizarre control tactic during the marriage.
 [6:12] - Breaking down the financial manipulations and their emotional impact.
 [8:33] - The truth about court-ordered temporary maintenance and the games played with joint accounts.
 [10:20] - Uncovering how generosity was weaponized to maintain appearances.
 [12:45] - Closing reflections on resilience, taking the high road, and the importance of community support.

Links & Resources:

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This week, we’re diving into one of the most challenging experiences a parent can face: navigating divorce from a narcissistic partner. Sharing insights from leading experts like Dr. David E. Clark, along with my own journey, we explore the devastating impact of narcissistic parenting and how it can dismantle relationships with your children. But don’t worry—you’re not alone, and there is hope.

If you’ve been through the heartache of co-parenting with a narcissist or are struggling to find your footing in the midst of it, this episode is here to help. Together, we unpack strategies to regain your strength, build connection with your kids, and reclaim your life. 

Episode Highlights:

[3:25] - Reading Dr. David E. Clark’s insights on narcissistic parenting and its devastating effects.
 [8:45] - The power dynamics of narcissistic abuse: control, smear campaigns, and spoiling children.
 [14:10] - Personal stories: witnessing the loss of connection with my daughter.
 [18:00] - Rebuilding relationships with your children despite narcissistic interference.
 [21:15] - Finding hope and clarity in the long-term journey to healing.
 [25:00] - Closing thoughts and how to share your own story or connect for support.

Links & Resources:

Dr. David E. Clark’s website: https://www.davideclarkephd.com/ 

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In this deeply personal and heartfelt episode of The Music of Life, I open up about the emotional and psychological abuse I endured during my marriage and how it shaped my life. Reflecting on childhood dynamics with emotionally unavailable parents, I share how these patterns influenced my choices and relationships as an adult.

This episode sheds light on the subtle yet devastating effects of emotional abuse, the power of storytelling in healing, and the resilience it takes to navigate these experiences. If you’ve ever felt trapped, unheard, or manipulated, this episode offers understanding, validation, and a reminder that you’re not alone.

Episode Highlights:
[0:00] - Introduction and the significance of sharing your story.
[2:12] - Reflecting on emotional neglect in childhood and its impact on adult relationships.
[6:48] - Recognizing the signs of emotional and psychological abuse in marriage.
[10:15] - How manipulation and withholding affection can erode self-worth.
[14:32] - Powerful dreams that revealed emotional trauma and subconscious fears.
[18:55] - The role of storytelling in finding community and healing from abuse.
[21:47] - Song inspirations for this episode: "Close My Eyes" by Mariah Carey, "Prisoner" by Raphael Lake, Aaron Levy, and Daniel Ryan Murphy, and "Sharks" by Imagine Dragons. 

Links & Resources:

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In this raw and revealing episode, I get into the challenges of navigating co-parenting and overcoming manipulation during and after divorce. From struggles with custody agreements to dealing with intentional disruptions, I share my experiences of staying resilient amidst attempts to alienate me from my daughter. You’ll hear about the impact of toxic dynamics, how I managed to rise above it all, and the lessons I learned along the way. Tune in to discover how I reclaimed my peace, launched this podcast as part of my healing journey, and continue to find strength while inspiring others to do the same.

Episode Highlights:

[0:07] - Kicking off the episode: reflections on adversity and co-parenting challenges.
 [5:45] - How my ex manipulated custody agreements and alienated my daughter.
 [9:10] - A bizarre story about the "dog food in the piano" incident and its deeper implications.
 [12:35] - The challenges of being excluded from pivotal parenting moments, like summer camp decisions.
 [13:55] - Finding healing and purpose through launching this podcast and sharing my story.

Links & Resources:

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In this episode, I share the raw and emotional journey of navigating a complex custody battle and the process of moving out of the home I shared with my ex-husband and daughter. I dive into the challenges of maintaining my relationship with my daughter amidst constant interference, control battles, and the heartbreak of watching her caught in the middle. This story touches on the relentless harassment, the custody hurdles, and the process of learning to set boundaries in an extremely high-conflict co-parenting situation.

Episode Highlights:
[00:01] - Kicking off with a look at how custody unfolded during the divorce.
[03:45] - Temporary custody battles: scheduling and struggles over 50/50 time.
[07:10] - Setting boundaries: learning to hold my ground in challenging situations.
[11:25] - The chaotic moving day: dealing with harassment and unexpected emotions.
[17:30] - Saying goodbye to my daughter: a gut-wrenching farewell in our kitchen.
[22:15] - Realizing that I’m now in a place of indifference and healing.

Links & Resources:
Be sure to follow, share, and leave a comment if this show resonates with you! Send me a message at podpage.com/themusicoflife to share your experiences, or to leave a comment. I'd love to feature it in a future episode.