We (Abby and I) recently hit one of those parenting walls where our strategies and tools that had worked well up to this point were not working anymore.

We believe in the power of contribution in our home and in our family. Society and humans are better when we’re connected and contributing, not just to ourselves but to each other.

But lately, the house has been a mess more often than not. Chores were not getting done and all the ways that Abby and I were trying to encourage, motivate, and get our kids to do what we wanted them to do were not working anymore. Our highest energy compliant child was still doing their chores and frankly picking up some of the slack that the other two kids were leaving behind.

The compliant child, like me and Abby was starting to feel resentment about it. We had to find a better way to encourage and motivate contribution in our home.

So, I went on the hunt to better understand motivation and how we as humans orient to expectations and I found Gretchen Rubin’s book, The Four Tendencies.

In the book she describes how each of the 4 tendencies orient to expectations and how we as their parents can align with our kids motivations and help them build a habit of contribution.

We’ve been putting the ideas in the book to the test by practicing new strategies with our kids over the past 2-3 months with excellent results and we wanted to share with you how we’re doing it and what’s working for us so you can do the same in your home with your kids!

Four Tendencies Cheat Sheet For Parents → https://gretchenrubin.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/Four-Tendencies-One-Sheet-Children.pdf

Four Tendencies Quiz → https://gretchenrubin.com/four-tendencies/

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

You can make regulating your nervous system easier by taking better care of your physical body.

If you know how to drop into your body and process your emotions, bringing your nervous system back to regulation but you’re not sleeping at night, you’re going to have to work a lot harder to regulate your emotions.

If you can take 10 minutes and do a thought download to observe your thoughts and get to know yourself better but you’re not regularly and consistently moving your physical body, regulating your emotions will be much harder to do.

The way in which you care for (or don’t) your physical body matters and will either make it easier or harder for you to regulate your emotions.

Everything we talk about in this podcast episode costs you nothing but your time and the willingness to build new habits or slightly adjust your routine each day.

The reward is a physical body that can handle dysregulation in yourself and in other people because its well taken care of.

Ready to build a physical foundation so regulating your emotions feels easier?

Listen now!

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

Have you ever found yourself keeping track of your spouse’s shortcomings?

Or waiting for them to change so you can finally relax, feel loved, or be okay?

If you’ve ever thought:

They make me feel anxious

or

If they’d just listen better, I wouldn’t get so upset.

It’s likely that you too are plagued by this very common mindset in relationships.

I know we (me and Abby) have been plagued by this mindset, especially in the first decade of our marriage and it’s pretty corrosive to the health of our relationship with each other.

Curious to learn more? Listen now!

We quote Dan Allender, Sue Johnson, and Esther Perel in this episode:

Sue Johnson

Dan Allender

Esther Perel

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

What if emotions aren’t as messy and unpredictable as we think they are?

What if the way your emotions work could be rationally and logically explained?

And what if you could completely change your life by learning how to interpret and regulate your emotions?

This is exactly what my coaching client, Sam did!

Listen now to hear his story.

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

Abby and I argued for years over one, surprising thing: to avoid having an impact on the other person that wasn’t purely positive.

Wait, what?! Why would we fight about this?

Because we were both trying to be selfless. We really wanted to serve the other person and take care of them and in the process we stopped taking care of ourselves (because wasn’t that the other person’s job now that we are married?)

So we stopped asking for things we wanted, like time alone or time with other friends (without our spouse), and even time together.

We tried to become selfless and this only resulted in more arguments and less connection.

In this episode we refer to Dr. Becky Kennedy as one of our parenting heroes, you can find her here: https://www.goodinside.com/about/

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

What was it like for you growing up?

Did you feel like you were adequately prepared and supported as you transitioned from being a child to growing into an adult?

What about life skills? As an adult did you find that you knew how to manage yourself and your life so you could feel at peace and safe no matter what happens?

Were you given autonomy and agency as you entered your teenage years or did your parents tighten the reigns of control over you even more?

Whatever your experience, I bet we all can agree that there are things we would want to improve on for our kids!

Now let’s talk about what you want for your kids.

How would you like your kids to transition from being a child to becoming an adult?

How would you like to support them in this very important life shift?

What would it look like for you to create a rite of passage for your kids?

Our oldest turned 12 this year and we’ve built a rite of passage plan for her that will span this next year with challenges and tasks for her to complete along the way. We want to welcome her into the world of women and make sure that she feels supported by her community!

The book we refer to in this episode is called 12 Tasks.

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

Abby and I are no longer in the baby and toddler season of parenting but we remember it fondly and with a lot of pain. 😂

It wasn’t until our 3rd and final child was a toddler that we started practicing the most important skill and man, it made all the difference. Before that we were often blown by the winds of chaos when our first two daughters were babies and toddlers because we didn’t know how to do it any other way.

In this episode we’ll share how you can survive and even feel better in the midst of the chaos and sleep deprivation of the baby and toddler season of parenthood.

As we reflect on that season of our lives, there were 3 things we learned and started practicing that made the most positive difference for our well being, our own peace and sanity during this demanding season of life.

If you’re a parent of babies or toddlers, we see you. We made this episode for you!

Our hope is that your season of parenting the little ones can be even better than ours since we didn’t learn some of these skills until our youngest was a toddler.

Ready to make one of the hardest seasons of life a lot better? Listen now!

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

Are you a ventaholic (yes, we made up a word)?

Do you enjoy a good vent session? I know I do. 😬

Do you find yourself venting about the same things, people, challenges over and over again?

IT’S A TRAP! 🪤

Venting is a trap. We find ourselves eating tasty treats but after we’re done venting nothing has actually changed (in the real world) unless we do something about it. So we stay stuck in the venting cycle which has non trivial downsides to it.

If you’re curious and want to learn more about how venting isn’t all that healthy for you or your relationships, this episode is for you!

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

When’s the last time you heard or said, “I’m really tired” or maybe, “why am I so tired today?”

How about when someone asks how you’re doing and you answer, “Tired”.

We wear tiredness like a shield and saying we’re tired often lets us opt out of naming what’s really, truly going on for us.

In this episode Abby and I get personal, sharing our own stories of shielding ourselves with “tired” instead of admitting that we’re feeling lonely or mentally drained.

We’ll share some of the tools we use to help us recover when we’re feeling physically, mentally or emotionally tired. The treatment is different based on which tired you’re feeling and it’s very personal, based on your temperament and personality.

If you want to learn how to recover quickly when you’re feeling tired and get to the root of what you’re feeling, (the thing underneath the tired) then you’ll love this episode!

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching

What if you could put something on your calendar or decide to do it and know that it was as good as done?!

When we first heard this phrase, it was irritating. Sounds nice, like a fairytale land for people without children!

Then we started doing our own work and both of us have worked with professionals (therapists and coaches) to help us grow.

And we realized, it’s totally possible to commit to something and know that it’s as good as done because we know how to follow through!

In this episode we’ll share with you the tools we use to get things done, consistently and to make a new change in our lives and show up consistently even when we don’t feel like it.

Turns out, we were blaming our kids and it wasn’t their fault. We just didn’t have the tools or skills we needed to commit to something and follow through!

Have a question or comment to share?We would love to hear from you!

You can send us an email at:[email protected]

Want to book a free coaching call?

Find a time here → https://calendar.app.google/CnogbPVEiXvThLeCA

Here’s where you can find us online:

Websites:

https://www.colemanhousefield.com/

https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/

Substack:colemanhousefield.substack.com

Instagram:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching