What is a promise that you made to yourself as a child?

She said, “ … When I was growing up, I had a youth group leader … she took me to a little restaurant called, Olga’s Kitchen. I don't even remember what she said to me, but I know she said something … that made me feel like she saw me … she didn’t understand what my story was, but she saw me and she reassured me that she loved me and I was beautiful inside and out … That there was a purpose for my life … I left that meeting with making a promise that if I made it through my teen years, I would spend the rest of my life helping other kids find their way …”

What once seemed, as a simple promise, is now part of Erica’s life work, to change the world through reforming practices and policies in domestic and international adoption.

What is a promise that you made that you still need to fulfill?

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Wholeness & Healing: Know your story and history

On Promises: What is a promise that you made that you still need to fulfill?

On Environment: Focus on creating and maintaining lifelong relationships

On Development: Focus on gaining valuable and meaningful experiences

For a long time, she didn't know how to use her voice.

She said, “ … A lot of my story, at least right now, has to do with my identity … Coming into that and finding the agency to claim that … when we think about finding our voices, I think that’s something that everybody goes through …”

Was there a time in your life when you felt that you didn’t have a voice? If so, how did you rediscover your voice?

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Identity: You get to claim your identity

On Criticism: Surround yourself with people who will support you

On Story: Know your roots

On Voice: Use your voice to be brave for others

Are you aware of the triggers that cause your stress or anxiety?

She said, “… It was in my Master’s program that I became aware of my triggers … You have to be aware of what causes your stress, your pressure, and your anxiety …”

Self-awareness or self-reflection, a process that is easier said than done.

A process that allows us to take a step back and reflect on our life, behavior and beliefs.

What do you to do to practice daily self-refection?

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Identity: Fall in love with yourself

On Stress: Become aware of what triggers your stress

On Anxiety: Take the time to reflect

On Environment: Be able to say, “No” to people who aren’t helping you grow

It all started when she was a little girl.

She said, “Since I was a little girl, I always knew that I wanted to be a social worker. So, I knew that I had to do certain things in order to be able to work with people …”

I was once told, “a dream written down with a definite date becomes a goal; a goal broken down into actionable steps becomes a plan; a plan supported by action becomes a reality.”

For Ebony, the process was not any different [dream -> goal -> plan -> reality]

She continued by saying, “ … I always knew that I wanted to work with people … I didn't know the form or the setting, but I knew that I wanted to work with teens … So, I knew regardless of the things that I was facing in foster care or the abuse that I was enduring that I had to keep pushing forward in order to see the ending light. In order to get to be where I am today to help other people …”

What are you doing to put yourself closer toward achieving your dreams? What type of people are your surrounding yourself with or need to surround yourself with to help you achieve those dreams?

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Story: Use your story to give back to others

On Trauma: Seek support groups

On Routine: Develop a routine that brings the best of you

On Self-Care: Take the time to care of your mind, body and spirit

It took him years to get to this point.

He said, “… The story that I was once ashamed of was the story that was helping liberate people from their own circumstances or issues they may have been ashamed of …”

What are you still ashamed of when it comes to sharing your story? How are you working through it?

It is by answering such questions Branden Brown was able to find his purpose in life, to help increase the quality of life of people and their families through teachings and powerful coaching experiences.

Tune in to our conversation with Branden Brown, as we discuss the importance of choosing your own family, treating others the same way you want them to treat you, helping yourself before you can help others, and many others.

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Family: You get to choose your family

On Relationships: Treat people the way you want them to treat you

On Helping Others: Help yourself before you can help others

On Narrative: Live the story you want to tell, not the story others want you to tell

What do you do when you experience negative self-talk?

An inner dialogue you have with yourself that often goes unnoticed.

She said, “… How do you get yourself to that part where you’re able to give yourself a positive self-talk? Not just hear it, but listen and believe it … How do you get to the point where you’re able to look yourself in the mirror and say, “I love you?”

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Self-Worth: Reflect on and acknowledge your accomplishments

On Healing: Heal yourself before you can heal others

On Forgiveness: “I forgive you for everything …”

On Self: “Define yourself for yourself, so you’re not crunched into other people's fantasies…”

Where do you look for strength during times of adversity?

She said, “I’ve been in therapy since the age of 13 and I’m still in therapy … It’s not shaming to go into therapy … It’s your strength … It’s connecting with that part of you that is strong … We don’t get over things, we move through things and you need someone to be there with you through your processing because what’s shareable is bearable within yourself …”

Who are the people that you can count on when times get tough?

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Stress Management: Break it down into parts to help you process

On Voice: Listen to your inner voice

On Negative Thinking: Recognize it, and then suggest THREE positive thoughts

On Shame: Learn how to adopt yourself

***

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"Where do you belong?"

A question that some, if not most of us, get asked over and over throughout our lifetime.

A question that evokes thousands of responses, but how often do you take the time to stop and truly think about your own definition of “belonging”?

What are the elements that make up “belonging”? What does it mean to truly belong somewhere? How does it make you feel?

What are the elements that make up your sense of belonging?

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Environment: “You’re the average of the five people you spend most of your time with”

On Growth: Surround yourself with people who will challenge your thinking

On Transition: Learn how to say, “No”

On Development: “Listen to people who are like you and follow in their footsteps”

A decision had to be made.

She said, “After being a foster for a little while, you just start wondering, ‘I want a family… I want to feel like I belong …’ You’re pushed to these strangers home and it didn't feel right to not know what to call them. I didn't want to call them, ‘uncle’ or ‘auntie’… They didn't feel like an ‘uncle’ or ‘auntie’… I knew that these people could potentially be really good for me in my life. That’s when I thought, ‘Maybe I should ask if I can call them Mom & Dad…’”

Do you remember the first time you called your parental figures, “Mom & Dad”? How did you feel after saying those words?

A set of questions that may be difficult for some, if not most of us to recall, but for Whitney, it’s a memory she’ll never forget.

What type of role have your parents played in your life?

If given one word to describe either of your parents, what would that word be?

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Foster Care: “Bloom where you are planted”

On Trust: Take one-step at a time

On Adversity: Know who you are

On Self-Worth: You are worth it

How does one develop trust? What are the elements that make up trust?

He said, “What I’ve seen in the past from my experience is trust really came from those who were consistent in my life …”

It is through consistency that we are able to tell whether or not people are fully invested in the relationship at hand.

Do they trust you enough to reveal deeper parts of themselves?

Do their actions speak louder than their words?

A set of questions that most of us seek answers to, as we try to form healthy and trustworthy relationships.

What questions do you seek answers to as you’re developing trust in a relationship?

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

On Mentorship: Find people who will help you see the bigger picture in life

On Developing Trust: Learn to observe your environment

On Leadership: “Actions always speak louder than words”

On Self-Narrative: “Why” do you want to share your story?