Aubrey Hirsch is a writer, illustrator, and NEA Literature Fellow whose work, featured in The New York Times, TIME, and beyond, explores gender, justice, and the body. We talk about surviving gun violence and how healing is “exhaustingly repetitive,” why the language of trauma often shows up as images, and how comics can turn rage into research-backed advocacy. We also get tactical about navigating medical gaslighting, setting boundaries in exam rooms, and building functional hope when the news feels impossible. If you’ve ever felt dismissed, silenced, or reduced to a chart label, this one’s for you. You’re not “too sensitive”, you’re reading your body’s signals.

In this episode:

• Survival, reframed: how surviving gun violence reshaped Aubrey’s relationship to her body, safety, and health care.
• The language of trauma: why memory lives in images, not words—and how comics help translate what the body remembers.
• Rage as fuel: turning anger into art, advocacy, and collective action instead of suppression or shame.
• Restoring power in care: scripts to counter medical gaslighting and reclaim control in exam rooms.
• Functional hope: how to keep steering toward progress—even when everything feels impossible.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

Aubrey's Instagram

Aubrey's Bluesky

Link to order Aubrey's newest book, Graphic Rage: Comics on Gender, Justice, and Life As a Woman in America

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

Dr. Arianna Sholes-Douglas is a board-certified OB-GYN, founder of TULA (“balance” in Sanskrit), and author of The Menopause Myth. We decode perimenopause starting in your 30s, how dropping estrogen rewires the brain (hello, rage/brain fog/sleep chaos), and why these shifts are biochemical—not character flaws. We delve into a practical approach to an integrative plan that combines hormones, nutrition, movement, and mental health; how to distinguish between TikTok tips and evidence-based recommendations; and why menopause is a workplace issue that leaders can’t ignore. If you’ve ever been dismissed, told to “just manage stress,” or treated like midlife is a decline, this one’s for you. You’re not “overreacting”—you’re adapting to a new operating system.

In this episode:

• Perimenopause, decoded: symptoms beyond hot flashes and why they can start in your 30s.
• Brain on estrogen: irritability, brain fog, and sleep disruption explained—what’s chemistry vs. “personality.”
• Whole-person care: how hormones, nutrition, movement, and mental health work together (and why one pill isn’t the plan).
• Misinformation filter: where to go for science (e.g., The Menopause Society), how to vet influencers, and what red flags to look out for.
• Community > isolation: the “science of sisterhood,” why real-life circles matter, and using social platforms without the overwhelm.
• Equity lens: how race, culture, and bias shape symptoms, access, and outcomes, and why women of color need extra advocacy.
• Be your own advocate: what to track, when to get a second opinion, and why bringing an appointment buddy can be lifesaving.
• Lifestyle pivots that help: alcohol, food, stress, and sleep. What served you at 25 may sabotage you at 45.
• Sexual health is health: normalizing conversations about vaginal changes, pain, and libido—evidence-based options included.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

Dr. Arianna's website

Book a consultation at Tula Wellness & Aesthetics

Purchase Dr. Arianna Sholes-Douglas book on Amazon

Podcast on Spotify and Apple and Youtube (available on all major platforms)

Follow Dr. Arianna Sholes-Douglas on socials:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LinkedIn⁠⁠

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

Dr. Sameena Rahman is an OB-GYN, menopause & sexual medicine specialist, and the force behind Gyno Girl. We unpack perimenopause beyond hot flashes, how vasomotor symptoms connect to heart and brain health, why South Asian women carry outsized cardiac risk, and why antidepressants are prescribed far more often than hormones. We also break the silence around sexual pain, recurrent UTIs, and pelvic floor dysfunction (spoiler: it’s not “just do more Kegels”) and walk through evidence-based treatments, including when vaginal estrogen or DHEA can be lifesaving. If you’ve ever been dismissed, rushed, or told to “have a glass of wine,” this one’s for you. Your pain isn’t a footnote—it’s data.

In this episode

• Perimenopause, decoded: symptoms beyond hot flashes and why vasomotor changes can signal broader cardiometabolic issues.
• Risk, reframed: the unique cardiac burden faced by South Asian women and what to ask your clinician.
• Meds mismatch: why many midlife women are 4x more likely to get an antidepressant than hormones—and how to navigate that conversation.
• Sexual health = health: genital urinary syndrome of menopause (GSM), recurrent UTIs, and pelvic floor dysfunction—and why Kegels can worsen pain for some.
• Treatments that help: role of pelvic floor PT, topical vaginal estrogen/DHEA, and a whole-person, “sex-detective” approach.
• Advocacy toolkit: how to prep for appointments, what to track, language to use at check-in (“pelvic concern”), and how to be heard.
• Culture & stigma: moving through shame (“sharam”), medical bias, and why sexual wellness at midlife is part of longevity, not vanity.
• Stronger bones, safer lives: why estrogen education matters for osteoporosis prevention and fracture risk.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

Dr. Sameena Rohman Instagram

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

Abigail Leonard is a journalist and author who blends intimate storytelling with sharp policy analysis. In her new book, Four Mothers, she follows first-time moms in Finland, Japan, Kenya, and the United States through their babies’ first year, revealing how culture and policy shape birth, postpartum care, mental health, and a mother’s sense of self.

Abigail’s work feels urgent for our community. In the U.S., new parents navigate a system with no guaranteed paid leave, patchy childcare, and persistent myths of maternal self-sacrifice. By contrasting that reality with countries that center maternal well-being, Abigail shows how support isn’t a luxury; it’s health care.

In this conversation, Abigail and I explore the universal shocks of new parenthood and the wildly different outcomes produced by policy and culture. We dig into birth, pain, breastfeeding pressure, paternal leave, social media, and the single policy change that would move the needle fastest.

• Birth & pain across countries: Japan’s limited pain relief, Kenya’s cost barriers, Finland’s mother-first comfort, and the U.S. “superwoman birth” myth.
• Postpartum support that works: Traditional 30–40 day rest practices in Japan and Kenya, and how modern policy can scale them.
• Mental health & loneliness: Why anxiety, identity shifts, and grief are common and how community (not opinions) protects mothers.
• Fathers matter (and so do norms): Why paternity leave uptake depends as much on culture as on law, plus what’s changing
• The corporate perks problem: How generous leave for some widens inequality for most, and who’s blocking national paid leave.
• One big fix: The case for guaranteed paid family leave now—and what should follow (childcare, community care).

Four Mothers is available wherever you get books. If you’re navigating postpartum anxiety or depression, you’re not alone—talk to your provider and lean on your people.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

Connect with Abigail on Instagram

Four Mothers

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

Elaine Lin Hering is a globally recognized facilitator, writer, and speaker who has worked on six continents, helping people and organizations develop the skills we often lack: effective communication, collaboration, and conflict resolution. She has taught executive education at Harvard, Dartmouth, Berkeley, and UCLA, and has even served as the Advanced Training Director for the Harvard Mediation Program.

Elaine’s book, Unlearning Silence, feels especially urgent for our community. Too often, women, and especially women of color, are told that the solution is to “speak up.” But as Elaine shows us, silence isn’t a personal failing. It’s something we’re taught by families, cultures, workplaces, and systems that punish us when we use our voices.

In this conversation, Elaine and I discuss how silence impacts our health, leadership, and relationships, and how we can begin to unlearn it. Because when we do, we create space for lives that are more fulfilling, more just, and more free.

• The real diagnosis: Why “just speak up” misses the point and how silence is learned, rewarded, and punished.
• Identity: How gender, race, ability, and intersectionality affect who is heard (and who isn’t).
• Health care power dynamics: What happens when providers minimize symptoms and concrete ways to reclaim agency (second opinions, switching doctors, bringing allies, better documentation).
• From window dressing to impact: The difference between being “at the table” and being listened to, plus what leaders must change.
• Designing for listening: Practical ways teams can reduce systemic silencing (better meeting design, multiple channels for input, closing the feedback loop).
• Micro-reps for courage: Safe, low-risk experiments to strengthen your “speak-up” muscle (time-bound trials, low-stakes preferences, scripts).
• Legacy work: Breaking generational silence and building relationships that can repair, not just endure.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

LinkedIn Profile

@elainelinhering on IG

Elaine's Website

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

In this powerful episode, physician, medical director, and advocate Dr. Bayo Curry-Winchell shares her harrowing birth story, how she was dismissed in her own hospital, and the mission it launched: to make U.S. healthcare believe women, especially Black women, the first time they speak. We unpack why America’s maternal mortality crisis persists, how bias shows up at the bedside, and what concrete steps clinicians, patients, and policymakers can take now.

• Birth trauma & the credibility gap: Why women aren’t believed about their bodies and what that costs.
• Beyond access: How implicit bias, systemic racism, and a fractured health system drive outcomes for Black mothers.
• Language matters: Retiring the word “normal” in exam rooms and replacing it with curiosity and care.
• Race in the chart: How tools like the old VBAC calculator (with race baked in) perpetuated inequity and why evidence change can take 17 years to reach practice.
• Policy to bedside: How restrictive reproductive laws ripple into ERs and ORs, delaying life-saving care.
• Advocacy playbook: Tactics for patients bring a witness, track symptoms, ask, “Help me understand why you think this is normal?”
• Training tomorrow’s clinicians: Teaching students to pause assumptions, listen first, and practice empathetic care.
• Storytelling as medicine: How sharing our stories (“me too”) builds community, shifts culture, and saves lives.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

Beyond Clinical Walls

TED Talks by Dr. Bayo

Dr. Bayo's Website

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

Shannon Watts is someone who has forever changed the conversation around gun violence and what it means to be a woman on fire. She is the founder of Moms Demand Action, the grassroots movement she launched from her kitchen table the day after the Sandy Hook tragedy. What started as a single Facebook post quickly grew into the largest women-led, volunteer-driven organization in the country, now part of Everytown for Gun Safety, with chapters in all 50 states and nearly 11 million supporters.

Before all of this, Shannon was a stay-at-home mom of five and a former corporate communications executive. Today, she's one of TIME's 100 Most Influential People and a relentless advocate for women's leadership, gun safety, and personal transformation.

In this conversation, Shannon joins The Pain Gap to discuss her new book, Fired Up, which serves as both a rallying cry and a roadmap for women who are ready to stop living in their "shoulds" and start following their passion. We discuss burnout, bravery, the myth of balance, and why stepping into your power—at any age—isn't just radical, but necessary.

Whether your fire is personal, political, or quietly beginning to burn, Shannon reminds us that it's never too late to light it—and that we all have a role to play in lighting up the world.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

Shannon's Website

Instagram: Shannonrwatts

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, visit Anushay's website or sign up for her Substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

Jackie Piasta is a nationally recognized Women’s Health Nurse Practitioner and certified Menopause Society Practitioner. Jackie has dedicated her career to filling the gaping holes in how we care for midlife women, from revamping the menopause curriculum at Vanderbilt University to training over 150 clinicians through her mentorship program. She's also the founder of Monarch Health, where she’s reimagining what compassionate, evidence-based, personalized care looks like for women navigating perimenopause, menopause, sexual health, and everything in between.

In this conversation, we talk about the myths that keep women suffering in silence, the staggering gaps in medical training around menopause, and why women are still being told their symptoms are "all in their heads." Jackie also shares what we can do right now to feel better, advocate for ourselves, and age with strength, knowledge, and power.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

Following Jackie on Instagram:

@jackiep_gynnp

@mymonarchhealth

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

Brittany Brathwaite, Kimberly Huggins, and Tesiah Coleman are the founders of Kyndred, a revolutionary new health platform transforming care for Black women and gender-expansive people.

Together, these leaders are not just exposing what is broken in the system. They are building something radically better. With backgrounds in reproductive justice, trauma-informed therapy, nursing, and health equity, Brittany, Kimberly, and Tesiah bring deep expertise and lived experience to the creation of a healthcare model that is digital first, race-conscious, and rooted in community.

In this episode, we explore:

• The origins and vision behind Kyndred

• Why self-advocacy is not enough and what proper care looks like

• The mental and emotional toll of navigating a system not built for you

• How Kyndred is redefining access, education, and joy in healthcare

• Why Black women need not just providers but health care homegirls

Kyndred is a groundbreaking, Black-owned and operated virtual clinic dedicated to transforming sexual and reproductive health for Black women. Through a digital-first platform, Kyndred provides race-concordant, culturally responsive, and patient-centered care that affirms joy, autonomy, and community. Join the waitlist or learn more here.

Episode Resources:

• The Pain Gap
• Website: www.withkyndred.com
• Link to join Kyndred Waitlist for Care
• Link for Healthcare Providers Interested in Working with Kyndred
• Instagram: @withkyndred
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/withkyndred/

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]

Dr. David Clarke is the President of the Association for the Treatment of Neuroplastic Symptoms and a board-certified gastroenterologist. Dr. Clarke has spent decades uncovering the hidden link between emotional trauma and physical illness.

We unpack what neuroplastic symptoms are, real, brain-generated conditions triggered by stress, trauma, and repressed emotions, and why women are disproportionately impacted. From IBS and migraines to chronic pelvic pain and long COVID, many “medically unexplained” conditions are rooted in the brain’s wiring.

Dr. Clarke also explains how Neuroplastic Recovery Therapy is helping patients finally find relief, without the need for drugs or surgery. If you've ever been told your pain isn't real, or that doctors “can’t find anything wrong,” this episode is for you.

Episode Resources:

The Pain Gap

Symptomatic.Me

To learn more about Anushay Hossain's work, check out Anushay's website or sign up for her substack. To continue the conversation, feel free to DM @anushayhossain or email me at [email protected]