The Real Stuff with Lucie Fink

This episode is part four of "All the Stuff I Don't Usually Talk About." (The final part of a four-part mini series!)


If you've been following along, this is the one where I get into the mindset work behind everything else. In 2018 a life coach reached out to me, and I've worked with her nearly every week for seven years since. What began as mindset coaching turned into business strategy and then into a mix of both, and she has helped me reshape how I show up in my career and in my life.


I'm sharing the shifts that have stuck with me the most: the mountain analogy I use when I catch myself feeling competitive with other creators, what changed once I started saying the uncomfortable thing out loud, and why so much of my disappointment in parenting comes down to expectations versus reality. I'm also talking about how I rebuilt my relationship with my workday so my weeks feel personally and creatively fulfilling, and about the financial goal I chased for six years and the surprising question that arrived the moment I hit it.


If you liked this series, let me know in the comments, and send me any ideas you have for future mini series!

Sponsors:

Cotton: Cotton: Learn more at https:/www.TheFabricOfOurLives.com

Talkspace: Get $80 off your first month with promo code SPACE80 at https://www.Talkspace.com

Target: All that’s new and uniquely you. It’s in the bag. https://www.target.com

Shopbob: Download the Shopbop app and use code "realstuff" for 15% off your first app purchase.

Watch this episode in video form on Spotify or YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There are parts of my influencer life I've never really talked about publicly... until now. Welcome to part three of my four-part mini series, "All the Stuff I Don't Usually Talk About."

You might feel like you know everything about my life, but what you see is only a tiny fraction of it. In this episode I'm pulling back the curtain on the creator side of things: how one of my recent vlogs was pieced together from just a few seconds of filming each day, and why I've always chosen to curate what I share.

I'm also getting into how I came into this career (I never set out to be an influencer), why I'd keep making things whether I had ten followers or ten million, and why I believe audience size and business success are two very different things. I'm sharing why I think more followers can actually make your life worse, what it's like when your neighbors and the people in your town already follow you (including a playground story that's hilarious in hindsight), and my honest take on the idea that friends who don't like your posts aren't really your friends.

If you've ever been curious what this job is like from the inside, this one is for you.

Come back next week for part four, all about mindset shifts!

Sponsors:

Shopbob: Download the Shopbop app and use code "realstuff" for 15% off your first app purchase.

Cotton: Learn more at TheFabricOfOurLives.com

Labcorp OnDemand: Visit https://www.OnDemand.Labcorp.com/realstuff and use code "realstuff" to save up to 15% on select tests.

Watch this episode in video form on Spotify or YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is part two of "All the Stuff I Don’t Usually Talk About." (A new, four-part mini-series).

If you thought episode one was juicy, this one is just as honest; this time about parenting.

I've been parenting publicly since the day Milo was born, which comes with its own strange pressure. I'm getting into the stuff I don't usually post about: catching myself reacting to my kids' friendship drama as if I'm reliving my own issues at school, the interesting parallels between Milo's sibling antics and things I used to do to my own sister thirty years ago, and the constant second-guessing that comes with deciding how many activities is too many.

I'm also talking about holding Milo back from kindergarten, the milestone comparisons that come with being surrounded by other parents in a small town, and the shift Michael and I have had to make from gentle parenting to something a little more authoritative as our almost five-year-old pushes back harder than ever. I'm sharing the exact phrase that's been working on our toddler when he's snapping at us, and why I don't think there's ever really a right answer in parenting (just a lot of trying things and seeing what feels right).

If you're a parent, I hope this makes you feel less alone. We are all figuring it out in real time, even the people whose lives look put together online.

Come back next week for part three, all about influencer life!!

Sponsors:

Quince: Go to https://www.Quince.com/REALSTUFF for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

Ladder: If you have an iPhone, head to https://www.ladder.fit/REALSTUFF and get a free 7-day trial with no credit card and $10 off your first month.

Labcorp OnDemand: Visit https://www.OnDemand.Labcorp.com/realstuff and use code "realstuff" to save up to 15% on select tests.

Watch this episode in video form on Spotify or YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There are parts of my marriage I’ve never really talked about publicly…until now.

Welcome to part one of a new four-part mini series, All the Stuff I Don’t Usually Talk About. I may share a lot of my life online, but the reality is that you’re only seeing a tiny fraction of what’s actually happening behind the scenes. In this episode, we’re starting with marriage.

I’m opening up about what Michael and I actually argue about, how having kids changed our relationship, the ways our communication styles differ, and some of the traits in myself that I’ve had to confront along the way. I talk about my tendency to problem-solve when Michael really needs emotional support, why I’m working on becoming a better listener, my defensiveness during conflict, and some of the ways we approach parenting differently.

I also share why becoming parents was the first time I truly understood what people meant when they told us “marriage is hard” — and why even after more than a decade together before having kids, we still had to learn how to navigate an entirely new version of our relationship.

Michael and I have a relationship I’m incredibly grateful for, and we still have things we work through. We both go to therapy, we’ve tried couples counseling, and I’m always interested in finding ways to communicate better and continue strengthening our relationship.

If you’re married, partnered, parenting together, or have ever wondered what really goes on behind the scenes of a relationship that looks solid from the outside, this one is for you.

It’s vulnerable, but I think that's exactly why it's useful.

Sponsors:

Cotton: Learn more at https://www.TheFabricOfOurLives.com

Labcorp OnDemand: Visit https://www.OnDemand.Labcorp.com/realstuff and use code "realstuff" to save up to 15% on select tests.

Nutrafol: Visit https://www.nutrafol.com and enter promo code REALSTUFF for $10 off your first month's subscription and free shipping.

ButcherBox: Go to https://www.ButcherBox.com/realstuff for $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ground beef for life, or free chicken thighs or top sirloins in every box for a year – with free shipping always.

Watch this episode in video form on Spotify or YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's guest is Keltie Knight—a name a lot of you will know from her years hosting E! News, and someone I've wanted on this show since it started. Our paths actually crossed years ago through her best friend Christina Perry, an early guest on this podcast.

Watch this episode in video form on Spotify or YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's guest is Sabrina Chazen, a size-inclusive fashion blogger and full-time content creator I've wanted on the show since day one. We met on a brand trip in Miami a couple of years ago, and within minutes of talking to her, I knew: this woman does not hold back. It's honestly wild that it's taken us two years to actually record this.

Sabrina came on ready to talk about her GLP-1 journey, something she's barely spoken about publicly despite being one of the earliest people I knew to try it (before it was the topic of conversation it is now). However, her story isn't the one you'd expect. The drug didn't make her smaller. She lost some weight at first, then her insurance stopped covering it once her bloodwork improved, and things unraveled from there (including, at one point, quietly taking it from her dad's fridge). What she describes isn't really about the number on the scale; it’s what the medication was doing for her body that had nothing to do with weight loss at all—and how strange it feels to explain that to a world that assumes GLP-1s are only about getting thin.

Then the conversation shifts into something even more raw: a friendship breakup that Sabrina has alluded to online for over a year but never told in full. It starts at her local club, with Sabrina checking in on a friend's kids during a rough patch, and ends, later that same night, with her own son bleeding from a head injury and that same friend going silent for hours when she needed her most. It’s a real, unfiltered conversation about boundaries, forgiveness, and the specific chaos that hits women's friendships in their late 30s and 40s; something Sabrina says she's never experienced at this level before in her life.

We also get into the business side of Sabrina's world: how she quietly built a six-figure affiliate marketing career, one link at a time, starting with a goal of just $100 a day.

Thank you, Sabrina, for finally sitting down with me and for trusting our audience with all of it. If you're watching on YouTube, drop a comment and let her know you're rooting for her!

Follow Sabrina: https://www.instagram.com/sabrinachazen/

Sponsors:

Quince: Go to https://www.Quince.com/REALSTUFF for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

Labcorp OnDemand: Visit https://www.OnDemand.Labcorp.com/realstuff and use code "realstuff" to save up to 15% on select tests.

Watch this episode in video form on Spotify or YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the second part of the conversation with my husband, Michael. If you missed part one, we covered parenting, marriage, and life with two toddlers. This time, we're talking about what happens when your husband becomes your business partner, too.

It's been just over six months since Michael left his corporate job to join me full-time at Lucie Fink Media, and we're getting into what that's actually looked like day-to-day. Michael walks through his role overseeing the finances of the business, including a tracker spreadsheet that helped us catch a payment we never received from a brand deal, and how that role has expanded into bigger projects: helping spearhead our Spotify Video partnership, exploring equity investments in brands we believe in, and starting early conversations around a scholarship fund for students who want to get into media but don't have an easy path in.

We also get honest about the friction points: our very different working styles (Michael is methodical and slow-paced, I move fast and want things done immediately), how we navigate boundaries between work time and personal time, and a moment early on where our different paces led to a real "whoa, let's not do that again" meeting.

Then we open it up to your questions from Instagram, including what's given Michael the most joy since leaving corporate (spoiler: his health has changed dramatically), whether we took a financial hit as a family when he left his salary behind, and how we handle delegating tasks to each other. We also still don't have an official job title for him, so let us know in the comments what you think it should be!

Sponsors:

Cotton: Learn more at https://www.TheFabricOfOurLives.com

Labcorp OnDemand: Visit https://www.OnDemand.Labcorp.com/realstuff and use code "realstuff" to save up to 15% on select tests.

Nutrafol: Visit https://www.nutrafol.com and enter promo code REALSTUFF for $10 off your first month's subscription and free shipping.

Ladder: If you have an iPhone, head to https://www.ladder.fit/REALSTUFF and get a free 7-day trial with no credit card and $10 off your first month.

Vinted: Download the Vinted app for free to start listing with no seller fees.

Watch this episode in video form on Spotify or YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today I'm bringing my husband Michael back on the show for a special two-part episode. This week is all about parenting.

Michael and I recently became co-CEOs of our life together, when he left his corporate job to join me at Lucie Fink Media. Today, we’re catching up on the family side of things, and we're recording it in a pretty unusual setting: we've moved in with Michael's parents for the entire summer while our house undergoes a renovation—which means we're currently living under one roof with ten people, including Michael's sister, her husband, and their six-month-old baby.

We get honest about the sibling dynamics between our two kids, Milo (almost five) and Coco (almost two). We also talk about a couples therapy session we did (not about our marriage, but about how we tag team parenting when one of us is at a breaking point), and the specific hand signal our therapist suggested for when one of us needs to step away.

Michael also shares some parenting mistakes worth learning from, including a Nanit monitor feature he wishes he'd never turned on, and the shockingly simple trick (a 10:30pm wake up and a whispered secret code word) that finally stopped Milo's middle of the night wake ups.

We close out the episode with a rapid fire round of your questions, covering everything from what surprised us about having a boy and a girl, to what we wish we'd known before having kids, to how we handle disagreements as parents.

Part two, all about working together since Michael left corporate, is coming next week!

Sponsors:

Quince: Go to https://www.Quince.com/REALSTUFF for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

Labcorp OnDemand: Visit https://www.OnDemand.Labcorp.com/realstuff and use code "realstuff" to save up to 15% on select tests.

ButcherBox: Go to https://www.ButcherBox.com/realstuff for $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ground beef for life, or free chicken thighs or top sirloins in every box for a year – with free shipping always.

instant hydration: Go to https://www.instanthydration.com/realstuff and use my promo code REALSTUFF for over 40% off your first subscription order.

Watch this episode in video form on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A few months ago I posted about attending an Instagram event in New York City, where they walked me through Teen Accounts. This is a feature now used by hundreds of millions of teenagers worldwide. The reaction split my audience right down the middle. Parents of teens thanked me for sharing it, while parents of young kids (myself included) responded with skepticism.

So I decided to go straight to the source.

Today I'm sitting down with Tara Hopkins, who works in policy at Instagram. My kids are still young, so phones and social media still feel like a distant (and sometimes terrifying) hypothetical for future me. But it's already a big topic of conversation in my house, and I had a lot of questions.

Tara's career path alone is worth the listen: from the European Parliament in Brussels, to the UK's largest child protection charity, to Instagram in her early 40s, when she said she "wanted to start to learn again." She's also a mom of two teenagers, 16 and 13, so she's not just building this stuff, she's living it at home, too.

In this episode, Tara walks me through how Instagram's AI can detect that a user is a teen even if they lie about their age, why 97% of 13-to-15-year-olds stay in the most restrictive settings without ever asking to change them, and how 94% of parents surveyed in the US said Teen Accounts have been helpful. Tara also walks through the specifics, like the 60-minute time notification and the 10pm to 7am sleep mode.

During our discussion, I bring up something that's bugged me for a while: why does my own educational content, like the stuff I share about periods and reproductive health, sometimes get flagged? Her answer actually helped clear up a lot of my own misconceptions.

There’s a part near the end that you may find especially interesting. We talk about what parents can and cannot see in their teen's DMs, and why they drew that line exactly where they did.

Instagram Teen Accounts —now inspired by 13+ movie ratings—are designed to give parents peace of mind that their teens are safer with the right protections in place. Learn more about Instagram Teen Accounts at https://about.fb.com/news/2025/10/instagram-teen-accounts-pg-13-ratings/

Support your family’s online experience with expert guidance and tools from Meta’s Family Center. Explore resources today, including Meta’s Screen Smart Program, at https://familycenter.meta.com.

Watch this episode in video form on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today's audience caller is Chloe and she's a milestone guest for The Real Stuff: our first trans guest in three seasons! A couple of past callers with similar stories backed out right before we hit record, which tells you everything about how much courage this actually takes. I'm endlessly grateful to Chloe for being the one who said yes.

Here's the twist: Chloe didn't discover she was trans as a kid, or a teenager, or even in her 20s. She was 45 years old and sitting in a UK office on her lunch break when she downloaded a FaceApp filter that gender-swaps photos. It started mostly as a joke. She pressed the button expecting to laugh. Instead, she disappeared into the bathroom for almost an hour, just staring at the picture. That was October 2023.

What follows is Chloe walking us through absolutely everything—and I mean everything. The month she couldn't sleep. Coming out to her wife of nearly a decade (whose response was somehow even more generous than you'd hope for). Coming out to her parents, her job, eventually the whole world via a single Facebook post. The diagnosis process. And yes, the actual cost of transitioning, dollar for dollar and pound for pound. From NHS waitlists to $80,000 surgeries in California to significantly cheaper options in Thailand.

We also get into a genuinely fascinating deep dive into the anatomy of the surgery itself. 

Chloe, now separated and in her late 40s, is traveling solo, dating again, and finally—for the first time in her life—getting to be herself, out loud, in public.

Thank you, Chloe, for trusting us with your story!

Follow Chloe: https://www.instagram.com/lucyseekelly/

Sponsors:

Forkful: Head to https://forkfulmeals.com/LUCIE for 50% off your first order today!

Ladder: If you have an iPhone, head to https://www.ladder.fit/REALSTUFF and get a free 7-day trial with no credit card and $10 off your first month.

Watch this episode in video form on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLjmevEcbh5h5FEX0pazPEtN86t7eb2OgX

To apply to be a guest on the show, visit luciefink.com/apply and send us your story.

I also want to extend a special thank you to East Love for the show's theme song, Rolling Stone.

Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealstuffpod

Find Lucie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/luciebfink/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@luciebfink

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/luciebfink

Website: https://luciefink.com/

Subscribe to my free newsletter "The Lucie List" here: https://thelucielist.beehiiv.com/subscribe

Executive Producer: Cloud10

Produced by Dear Media.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices