Unless of course you're the mysterious Parrot-Man and then it's the most colourful moves.

What have we got to get those house related juices going?

Well try this for size :

The vital need-to-know info on estate agents, how they SHOULD be trained and why conveyancers don't deserve all the flak ( well ok, they can have some!).

Simon Bradbury, who in the nicest possible way, has been around the block is your man when it comes to brilliant guidance and we've got him on.

What Simon doesn't know isn't in this podcast.

HMOs. An acronym to strike fear into the deepest pages of any self respecting Facebook community group.

We talk about it - pick Simmo's brains and tell you about the council that's railing against them.

Charlie Says spreads the word about the sale of Zoopla and as you'd expect, Charlie has some unequalled anecdotes and insight.

Then there's the small matter of Selling Somerset as told by Richard Batten of Move On Removals.

Is it a bird? Is it a man? No it's both!

This is nowhere near as bizarre and unreasonable as it sounds.

Simon Bradbury reckons it should be one of the yardsticks when choosing who to sell your house with.

Simon doesn't stop there.

The biggest story from one of his recent viral videos over in Cambridgeshire is all about sole agency contracts. If you want to know what NOT to do when engaging an agent, Simon's your man and he's here to impart endless wisdom.

The Property Ombudsman have just struck off 4 property businesses and Charlie Lamdin is along to share his analysis of this story and how complaints and regulation are handled when it comes to property transactions.

As is always the way, there's plenty of candour from Simmo, as he reveals what happened when he crossed swords with the Ombudsman over a rogue bike!

Alan the landlord, chef and self-builder has some good news and the end is much nearer - listen in and catch the latest positive development in what's been a torrid journey.

Selling Somerset is told from the perspective of a renter who thought she'd found some nice cloths in the property and we're feeling flush as we tell the story of some public loos that proved to be more than convenient in the property market.

It's a George Clarke special.

No Sir!

We've just been crowned the number one podcast in Goodpods Home and Garden category.

Perhaps no surprise given the collision of these ear catching features :

- Why property renovations could LOSE you money

- How to know if you can trust a lettings agency

- Which house price index is actually telling it like it is

AND

- When is a car park a more attractive marketing proposition than a portal ?

PLUS

Self build wisdom from Alan in Northamptonshire and the reason behind Simmo blagging a free bottle of oil.

Well okay, the lending rulebook for mortgages isn't about to be ripped up anytime soon.

BUT

Our expert-in-the-field Samuel Gee is on hand to look at the news story about mortgage rules potentially being eased.

*MASSIVE UNDERSTATEMENT ALERT* Sam knows his stuff.

And then some.

We do like to think of ourselves as a podcast that informs and entertains and when Charlie Lamdin is on a roll, he can certainly perform both of those.

Give him a subject he's passionate about and off he goes.

This time it's the digitalisation of property transactions. Try saying that when you're on a train from Exeter, the seagulls are in full voice and you're attempting to complete the Rachel Reeves missing CV years word-search!

Alan is back ( thank goodness ) to bring you bang up to date with his self build in Northamptonshire and I've got two more things to say to you :

Selling Somerset copycats and black mould.

Intrigued? You should be!

What a start to the year!

Top flight interior designer Nichola Haysey of Haysey Designs is with us to pick over the techniques, fabrics and styles she's seeing as on trend for 2025.

Have you got your sconces yet?!

Question for you : if you never saw a For Sale board again, would it bother you? More to the point, would it bother Simmo?

Discover which council thinks there are too many of them and whether they'll disappear for good?

Is it too early to call this a board crisis?

The erudite voice of eloquence Charlie Lamdin delivers another Charlie Says and this time, his crosshairs are trained on the introducers and middle men of conveyancing.

You can also check out the latest report on the kinds of smells that can help to sell a house. NO, it's not freshly baked bread anymore - we've moved on from that!

There's also Selling Somerset which is, shall we say, quite fowl!

A very Merry Christmas from the leading property podcast!

Dale Bradford knows how to glamourise estate agency. Responsible for the brand new book " The Time Travelling Estate Agent "

Dale puts veteran agent Eric Meek front and centre of a saga that begins in a garage in an unassuming suburban property. We chat to Dale and discover what some of the early readers have found believable and conversely, which bits unwittingly stretch credibility! It may not be what you think.

Bad Santa ( aka Charlie Lamdin ) crops up in this, our festive episode to unveil his property Xmas wish.

Is there any way he'll get what he longs for?

Selling Somerset takes an unexpected turn - we won't say anything else other than you HAVE to listen to Katy's story.

Plus there's a chance to get Simmo's experienced view of ultra long mortgages and how they affect retirees. You can also pick up thoughts on BTLs and landlords - will they keep dropping off in 2025?

They just don't get it.

The general public can't get their head round what it is estate agents actually do.

Thankfully, Stephen Brown is on hand to turn that around.

So will we ever get away from those low / no cost online merchants that give the industry a bad name? We pick over all of that and more with Stephen.

There's more sizzling truths from Charlie Lamdin, as he takes down the Ponzi nonsense videos that have been springing up left, right and centre on Facebook. " Do you want to make a million in two months?" No, we want to slap you in the face!

The self build diary is back up and running - Alan reports from deepest Grafton Regis and The Ghost of Flax Bourton is the spine-tingling tale in this month's Selling Somerset.

Oh yes and there's much sniggering about a Leaf!

There's an avocado just for you.

Or something like that.

The avocado bathroom suite was very much "of its time" - BUT the return of this bold statement ( euphemism alert ! ) is on the cards.

We'll chat to the wonderful interior designer Nichola Haysey of Haysey Designs - she'll give you her take and has stacks of fascinating observations on interiors trends and ways to make them work.

Here's a question for you :

When someone mentions the charity Shelter, what do you think of? After this month's Charlie Says, you may just revise your opinion. There's some explosive stuff in this property podcast.

If self builds are your thing, we're behind the scenes once more at Alan's place in Grafton Regis to see how it's coming along.

There's also mortgage rate talk and best of all - duck talk!

No, you didn't imagine that - find out what one estate agent came across on a very unusual visit.

It's amazing what a funny tweet makes you do.

The one by Rugby writer Paul Williams about what it's like to try and buy a house was hilarious and we HAD to talk about it. Just how much does Simmo hate his peers using the phrase " offers in excess of..."?

Turns out it's a lot.

If it grinds your gears too, listen in and find out you've got far more in common with this property professional than you thought possible!

After causing a stir with This Morning's Home Genie Georgina Burnett, self builder Alan Bonar-Drake serves up the latest audio diary on his project behind The White Hart in Grafton Regis. Find out precisely where his build is at.

Selling Somerset certainly isn't for the faint hearted. Or celibate! Simmo's up to his knees in it again!!

We're also going to give you a measured assessment of shared ownership.

Is it is bad as it's been painted in the media over the last couple of weeks?

There's only one way to find out.

Older homeowners are doing it, but are they doing it as well as they could?

Downsizing - it can be an emotional and sensitive time and if you're going to have a property journalist run the rule over this story, you have to get the best - Marc Shoffman.

Rent rises are cooling, according to Zoopla in a BBC report and so Simmo offers a wise summary and what it means for landlords and the housing market in general.

Charlie Lamdin is on the verge of launching the BestAgent Public House Price Index - Charlie explains how it works and why it's an important move for the sector and don't forget 4th Sep is BestAgent Day.

Selling Somerset does its thing once again and this time, Simmo gets all serious.

Throw in Alan working some ladder based magic with his self build update and you have the leading property podcast.