The Sober Boyz Podcast

If someone used to drink a bottle of liquor every day, quit for five years, and now smokes weed, are they sober? In this episode of the SoberBoyz podcast, we break down what sober actually means, and whether it changes with a prescription or a weed card. We get into “Cali sober,” why motives matter, and whether gambling, opiates, and other mood-altering habits count. We also cover the difference between being sober and doing a good recovery program, and why high-risk situations like the casino are worth a hard look. If you’re in recovery and weed is on your mind, this one will make you think. If you want to quit drinking, hit us up and we’ll do it with you!

If you were an alcoholic but stayed sober for years, can you ever have one beer with dinner or one glass of wine on vacation? In this episode of the SoberBoyz podcast, we talk about why “just one” is so risky once alcohol has been a problem, why the thought “I just want to be normal” is a red flag, and how rationalization starts long before the first drink. We also share the three questions to ask yourself before you ever try to drink again: why do I want to drink, what happened the last time I tried to control it, and what am I willing to risk to find out. If you’re thinking about drinking again, or you’ve already quit and want to stay sober, this one is for you. If you want to quit drinking, hit us up and we’ll do it with you.

Some of the things we say in sobriety are denial, and some are reality. In this episode the SoberBoyz go through statements people in sobriety say and call each one: “I can still hang around the bar, it doesn’t bother me,” “I only had a problem with liquor, beer was never an issue,” “I was a functioning alcoholic, so things weren’t really that bad,” “I could probably have one drink now, but I choose not to,” “I know myself well enough,” “I don’t need to talk about my past anymore,” “As long as I don’t pick up a drink, I’m doing everything right,” “My family should trust me by now,” and “I know exactly what caused my drinking problem.” We talk about why some of these are warning signs, which ones depend on the person, and what it takes to stay honest with yourself after you quit drinking. None of us are doctors or therapists, just guys sharing what we’ve seen and lived. Which one have you said yourself? Tell us in the comments. And if you wanna quit drinking, hit us up. We’ll do it with you.

You quit drinking, you’re doing everything you’re supposed to do, and you’re still not happy. Nobody prepares you for that part of sobriety. In this episode the SoberBoyz break down how to be happy after you quit drinking: why the unhappiness happens, the difference between being sober and actually working a recovery program, what we really miss when we miss drinking, and why the highs and lows level out once you find your baseline. We also answer four things listeners might say: “Nothing is fun anymore,” “My wife still doesn’t trust me,” “I feel empty even with a good job and family,” and “Is it even worth it?” None of us are doctors or therapists, just guys sharing what worked for us. Where do you feel stuck right now? Tell us in the comments. And if you wanna quit drinking, hit us up. We’ll do it with you.

In this choose your own adventure, Corey puts Tom, Adam, and Paul in a situation that could happen to any of us: a Saturday night barbecue, a friend who says he’s only had three beers and grabs his keys, and a situation that gets harder every round. The three beers turn out to be 16-ounce IPAs (about 5.6 standard drinks), then his wife and two kids are in the car, then he turns down a sober ride because he’s “done this hundreds of times.” Along the way they disagree on whether you can judge someone by how they look, whether a close friend and your own son get the same answer, whether “take the back roads” is a red flag, and whether you’d call the cops. Then the roles flip: if you were the one drinking, when would you want your friend to stop you? None of us are doctors or legal experts, but the rule that came up in the episode is simple: if you’ve been drinking, is there someone else who can drive? Where would you have stopped your friend? Tell us in the comments, and if you want to quit drinking, hit us up and we’ll do it with you.

If you only drink a couple times a year, there's no way you can have a drinking problem, right? That's the argument in this episode of Defend Your Drinking, where one of us defends a viewer's drinking and the other three challenge it. This week's viewer is Chris, who's 35. He says he doesn't drink every day or even every weekend, but at weddings, birthdays, holidays, and big games he has himself a good time, sometimes eight to ten drinks, a handful of times a year. He works hard, takes care of his family, and asks why he should quit when he barely drinks. Adam defends him, and the rest of us push back. We ask whether Chris can enjoy those events without drinking, and what it means if he can't. We talk about why "only on special occasions" can be a rule worth noticing, whether eight to ten drinks is a problem no matter how rarely it happens (we don't all agree), whether a hangover counts as a consequence, what a high tolerance says, and how the "social drinker" argument holds up when a guest is sloshed on the dance floor at your wedding. We compare it to smoking a pack of cigarettes ten times a year, and we rate Chris green, yellow, or red. We don't have enough information to call Chris an alcoholic, but we do disagree on whether his drinking is a problem. None of us are doctors and we can't diagnose anyone, so if you're worried about your own drinking, talk to a doctor or someone you trust. If you think you can defend your drinking, put your argument in the comments and it could be our next episode. We also want to hear about a way of drinking that all four of us could sign off on. If you want to quit drinking, hit us up and we'll do it with you. Subscribe to SoberBoyz for weekly conversations on sobriety, recovery, and living a clean life.

Would you know if your drinking had become a problem? In this episode, we play a game. One of us tells a story about Jason, a 38 year old who owns a construction company and has a wife and two kids. We don't tell it all at once. We give it out in five rounds, and after each round we have to decide: is this a problem yet, or do we need more information? You can play along at home. Jason starts out looking pretty normal. He says he only drinks on weekends. By the end, his nine year old is asked what dad likes to do for fun and says drinking beer with his friends. In between, we argue about whether eight to ten beers in one night is a problem (we don't all agree), what it means when his hangovers make him miss his kids' games, and what it says that he couldn't make it past day 11 of a 30 day break his wife asked for. None of us are doctors and we can't diagnose anyone, so if you're worried about your own drinking, talk to a doctor or someone you trust. Tell us in the comments which round you threw the flag, and where you stand on drinking at home with your kids. If you want to quit drinking, hit us up and we'll do it with you. Subscribe to SoberBoyz for weekly conversations on sobriety, recovery, and living a clean life.

"I'm married, I have two kids, I work hard, and I coach baseball. I drink four beers most nights. I don't drive after drinking, miss work, or fight with my wife. My life is good. Why should I stop?" A viewer sent us that, and in this episode of Defend Your Drinking, one of us argues his side while the other three challenge it. Along the way, you'll hear how to tell if your drinking is a problem even when everything in your life looks fine: why "most nights" is closer to every night than it sounds, why "my wife hasn't said anything" is a low bar to set, what the criteria clinicians look at really are (loss of control, repeated attempts to cut back, drinking despite consequences, neglecting responsibilities, cravings, and withdrawal, not just how many drinks you have), and how to ask yourself what the drinking is actually for. We also get into whether you can have a problem with drinking without being an alcoholic, what your kids are learning from what they see, and one simple question to put to yourself: can you stop for 30 days? None of this is a diagnosis, and if you're worried about your drinking, talk to a doctor or someone you trust before making changes. If you drink and think it's making your life better, put your argument in the comments, and yours could be the next one we take on. If you want to quit drinking, hit us up and we'll do it with you. Subscribe to SoberBoyz for weekly conversations on sobriety, recovery, and living a clean life.

Have you ever known exactly what you need to do and still not done it? In this episode, we break down what's actually more important for changing your life, motivation or discipline, and why knowing what to do is never enough on its own. We get into why motivation comes and goes, why discipline is the structure that carries you through the days you don't want to do it, and how accountability from a sponsor, a coach, or good friends helps you build it. We talk about why holding close friends accountable is so uncomfortable, whether discipline is something you're born with or something you learn, and how instant gratification and screens quietly kill motivation in every area of life. We also cover what it takes to start when you don't see a problem yet, why consequences are often what spark the change, and why you have to act on motivation the moment it shows up. Then we hit the all-or-nothing trap that makes one missed day feel like failure, why your routine has to be sustainable, and whether you can be too disciplined. Whether you're trying to stay sober, get to the gym, or build better habits, this one is for you. If you want to quit drinking, hit us up and we'll do it with you. Subscribe to SoberBoyz for weekly conversations on sobriety, recovery, and living a clean life!!

Why are we so bad at being bored? The second we have nothing to do, we reach for our phone, food, the TV, or a drink, and somewhere along the way doing nothing became uncomfortable. In this episode, we get into why that happens, how instant gratification and dopamine keep us reaching, and why a drink can be the same escape as a scroll, just with higher stakes. We also answer a viewer who says drinking is the first thing they want to do on any night with nothing going on, and ask whether that's something to worry about. Recovery is more than putting down alcohol, and boredom can be risky in early sobriety, so we talk about how to reframe it as a break from stimulation instead of something to run from, plus simple alternatives like walking, reading, and real conversation. Then we leave you with a challenge: 15 minutes a night with no phone, no music, and no TV, just you. Try it and tell us in the comments how it went. If you can't sit with yourself without reaching for an escape, that's worth taking a look at. Subscribe to SoberBoyz for weekly conversations on sobriety, recovery, and living a clean life!!