We got a few jokes and then an explanation as to why we are still giving mock draft updates.

Did you know there was still a Sports Illustrated? You do now. Our show is not illustrated. But it is illustrating?

We've got it all! Jokes from the weekend, a fake interview with that zamboni driver who ended up playing goalie this weekend and Dan provides some in depth xfl analysis followed by the mockest draft update yet.

cheating jokes, drug jokes, dad jokes.....it's a typical day in sports.

THAT'S RIGHT we are actually interviewing the commissioners trophy! Live from Houston! The Trophy has a lot to say about the astros cheating scandal and may have solved a decades old crime!

I've been around the block in the sports comedy world, shilling my bits for fox sports chicago, the joliet Jackhammers (rip) and for one glorious year I wrote bits for ESPN radio 1000 in chicago with my buddy Brad Morris. We were fired after a year, which was actually very very generous of them. Anyway although my Mel Kiper Jr. is not the best impression, it is surely one of the oldest. Have a listen!

That headline has nothing to do with this episode, just like mock drafts have nothing to do with the actual NFL draft, but that rant is at the end. Before that?........MAYBE?.....you have to listen to find out. (this tease doesn't pay off but listen anyway, maybe it does)

Thanks to the incredible resources available due to Parody Laws, we are able to bring you an Exclusive press conference where Astros owner ("wannabe real life Montgomery Burns") Jim Crane clarifies his comments from yesterday. Also, another mock draft update! Now with sound FX!

ANOTHER NEW SEGMENT?- sure why not? With only seventy something days until the ACTUAL NFL draft the mock drafts are updating constantly for absolutely zero reason. We'll keep you informed on what may be the least important information being generated in modern times.

Wait, you mean there are actually two people running this driver-less train?!?! The answer is KIND OF? Quincy and I talk about the incredibly complex list of ingredients that go into making our special brand of sports sausage (assholes are a vital ingredient in any good sausage, metaphorical or not).