The Stronger Revolution

Regardless of what you do in life, you are bound to receive criticism as some point. For the purposes of this article, criticism is a negative reaction to something that you do. Someone then feels compelled to share that opinion with you whether you ask for it or not.

Technically, there are two types of criticism in this world, regular criticism and constructive criticism. Someone may use regular criticism with the intent to hurt you, force you to do something, or prevent you from doing something. Constructive criticism is often described as something negative that is actually supposed to cause a positive response. While some literature out there distinguishes constructive criticism as something positive, I think of it as simply regular negative criticism with a smile on your face.

Regardless of the intent behind the criticizer, criticism can really hurt. It can make us second guess our actions or decisions. It can even stop us dead in our tracks. That is unless we know how to take advantage of criticism. Turn that negative into a positive, if you will.

There are three tactics I like to use to turn criticism from a negative into a positive. Generally speaking, think of criticism as a chance to self-reflect. Here are three ways to do that:

1. Understand that criticism is just an opinion: Criticism is not a fact, nor is it necessarily true. If it were, it wouldn’t be criticism. Criticism is nothing more than someone’s opinion. An opinion may be based in fact, but it isn’t inherently true. Thus, you have the chance to accept or reject someone’s opinion. Take the opportunity to reflect on yourself. Do you agree with the opinion? If so, change you action or decision. If not, move on.
2. Criticism is not bad by its nature, you judge it as bad: Words are not good or bad by the nature. We assign judgment to words as “good” or “bad.” If someone tells you that you made the wrong decision, you judge that as something bad. Therefore, try to avoid labels such as “good,” “bad,” “right,” “wrong.” Look at the criticism for what it is. Don’t add your own judgment or emotions.
3. Criticism that stings is often revealing something you already know and agree with: If it stings when someone says you eat too much dessert, it’s probably stings because you also think you eat too much dessert. If it stings when a coworker says you made a bad decision, it’s probably because a part of you also thinks you made an incorrect decision. Similar to #2 above, it isn’t the words that hurt us, it is someone else pointing out what we already know, but don’t like. Take this as a chance to reflect on yourself and change what you don’t like.

Criticism is rough. We are taught from an early age to let our ego and emotions get in the way. Therefore, it takes practice to turn something negative, like criticism, into a positive. However, when you can do it, you will find yourself welcoming the opinions of others. Maybe, you will even find that you prefer the negative opinions because that gives you the best chance to change for the better.

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It is time to end our series on Habits and move to new topics on how to improve your life through the aggregation of marginal gains.  Before we leave, however, we first need to address ending bad habits.

For a quick review, to form a habit, we need to follow the equation of B=MAP.  Spelled out, behavior modification (a habit) = motivation + ability + prompt.  When we get motivated to do something, we have to act quickly because motivation can go away fast.  To help with motivation, we need to reduce the action itself down to something super simple.  Don’t worry about doing 100 pushups on day one, do 1 pushup.  Don’t try to cook an entire meal of nothing but healthy food.  Simply try making some healthy vegetables.

For the ability factor, we follow the ability chain:  time, money, physical capacity, mental capacity, routine.  If you are lacking any one of these links in the chain, you cannot form a habit.  Thus, you may have to increase your learning.  You may have to increase your skills.  If you want to cook healthier dinners, but don’t know you to cook, you need to add to your physical and mental capacity.

Finally, anything can be used as a prompt.  This is simply a reminder to carry out your action.  You could use an alarm, a paper reminder, or a previous step in your regular routine.  If one prompt doesn’t work, try another.  The best kinds of prompts are those that are already part of your life.  You regularly brush your teeth.  So, use that action in your routine to prompt you to floss.

Now that we have that review, how does this relate to overcoming a bad habit?  Well, it’s not enough to simply say that you will overcome the bad habit with a good habit.  To do that, you have to try to replace an action that is already a habit with an action that isn’t a habit yet.  In other words, you are trying to replace an easy action with a harder action.  That’s a recipe for failure.

Instead, refer to the discussion above on how to form a habit.

First, you need the behavior modification, the new habit, the new action.  Pick an action that will replace the bad habit.  Maybe you want to start running instead of sitting on the couch eating potato chips.  Or, you want to start cooking lean meats and vegetables instead of pasta and pizza.

Next, overcome your strong, but wavering motivation.  reduce that new action way down so it is super easy.  Don’t worry about running 3 miles tomorrow, simply try to put on your shoes and go outside.  Go out and buy some vegetables so you have them in the fridge.   Your action will grow once you start.

Now, look at your ability.  Go back through the ability chain and check off each box.  Do you have the time for your new habit?  Sure, take the time you would be sitting on the couch and dedicate that to running.  However, if your new habit is making dinner from scratch, time might be a limiting factor.  When you find a break in the ability chain, address that issue.

Finally, set your prompt.  Pick a solid reminder.  Set your running shoes next to the couch so you see them . . . boom, prompt.  Put a note on your fridge reminding you to grab vegetables, not pasta for dinner . . . boom, prompt.  Try different prompts until you find one that works.

If you follow the above steps in an effort to find a new habit, replacing that bad habit will be easy.  Alternatively, you can disrupt B=MAP to kill a bad habit all together.  Change your routine so you don’t have the time to do the bad habit.  You just broke the ability chain.  Therefore, if you’ve been following along, you know that habit (whether bad or good) is not dead.

Benjamin Franklin once said it is easier to prevent a bad habit than it is to stop one.  That’s true.  However, bad habits have a sneaky way of working themselves into our life.  Following the steps above, you will be in control of those bad habits.

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This is the third installment of forming good habits.  So far, we’ve covered the first two parts of our habit forming equation, B=MAP.  We started with Motivation and talked about how to reduce the action of a new habit down so that motivation isn’t an issue.  Next, we talked about the ability to perform the new habit.  We laid out the 5 questions that make up the Ability Chain.  Those are designed to help you determine what factor, or factors, may be holding you back from your new habit.

So, in this episode, it is time to cover the “P.”  In order to carry out a habit, you need a prompt.  This is simply a reminder to do something.  A prompt can be anything.  You can use a post-it note stuck on your refrigerator to remind you to grab healthy options.  Or, you could set a reminder on your phone to cook breakfast every morning.

The easiest kind of prompt is a current habit that is already part of your routine.  That way, forming a new habit doesn’t require you to change very much in your life.  If you want to form the habit of wiping off the counters in your kitchen each night, use washing the dishes as your prompt to clean your counters.  You are already in the cleaning mood, so the new habit should flow easily into your current after dinner routine.

When you are deciding on a prompt for your new habit, be flexible.  Sometimes, the first prompt you pick won’t work.  So, try another.  Keep going until you either find a prompt that works, or you realize that habit just isn’t going to take hold.

Because we have laid out the three elements of forming a habit, it is easy for you at this point to evaluate why you just can’t seem to form a new habit.  First, make sure you have a purpose.  The “Why” behind your new habit will help you get through those periods when motivation is weak.  Next, you need to motivation to at least start the habit.  Third is the ability to perform the habit.  And finally, the prompt, or reminder, to do something.  Because of this layout, we can easily see where the deficiency is coming from.  If you have a good purpose, some basic motivation, and the ability, but the prompt isn’t working, then you know you need a new prompt.

Give the habit a good try.  However, don’t forget what we talked about in our first installment of habit forming, if you try and try and try, and the habit isn’t happening, it might be time to move on.

The post Habit Forming – Part 3 appeared first on Pittsburgh Crossfit | Industrial Athletics.

In the last post, and podcast episode, we started talking about forming good habits.  Turns out, there’s a system for forming good habits that works better than simply saying, “I want to do X,” and expecting it to become part of your routine.

I need to start by correcting an error.  Last time, I talked about the equation for a habit.  I said, Behavior Modification (the habit) = Motivation, ACTION, and Prompt.  Or, B=MAP.  My mistake was saying the “A” stands for action.  In fact, the “A” stands for Ability.  Thus, to form a habit, you have to have the ability to do the behavior. You can’t make flying a plane a habit if you don’t know how to fly a plane.

In his book, Tiny Habit, author BJ Fogg lists five questions you can ask to determine whether you have the ability to form a new habit:

If you answer “NO” to any of these questions, the chain breaks, and forming the new habit is going to be incredibly difficult, if not impossible.

The first question is whether you have enough time for the new habit.  My daily routine requires me to wake up at 4am every morning.  From there, I am at work by 5am, home to help my wife between 11:30am-1:30pm, and usually back to work until around 6:30pm.  By the time I get home, make dinner, eat, walk the dogs, and get ready for bed, it is 10pm and lights out.  Within those hours, I also have to get in a workout for 45 minutes.  If I wanted to form a habit of running for an hour each day, I don’t have time.  If I want to form a habit of journaling for 10 minutes a day, I can probably make the time.  So, for me, I may be able to answer “YES” to all the other questions above, but I have no time.

Going for a run outside is pretty much free.  Granted, there is some cost associated with running shoes, proper clothing, and maybe something to play music.  But, generally speaking, running is a pretty low cost activity.  However, if I wanted to take up horseback riding as my new habit, that comes at a much higher cost.  Especially if I am considering private lessons, my own horse, and all of the gear.  Realistically, that new habit might be out of my price range.

Unless I have been running regularly for some time, going zero to 1 hour of running per day is not going to happen.  It is going to require way too much physical effort.  I have to build up to it.

Chances are a new habit of running isn’t going to require too much mental effort.  There isn’t a lot of thinking involved.  However, a habit like reading philosophy before bed might tip the scales.  Philosophy is hard to read and can requires some deep concentration and contemplation.  By the end of the day, my brain is fried.  Additionally, I am trying to go to sleep when I climb into bed to read.  So, I probably don’t have the mental effort needed to make reading philosophy before bed a habit.

If a new habit fits into my current routine, that makes my life much easier.  If exercising is already part of my daily routine, and I want to switch up what I am doing, then making running a habit is going to be pretty easy.  However, if I don’t currently workout, and I have to rearrange my life to form a new routine, that’s going to make the habit much harder for form.  In this instance, it is much easier to form a habit if we can fit it into our current routine.

Assuming you answered “NO” to one of the questions above, how then do you change that “NO” to a “YES” so you can form a new habit?  First, you may have to increase your education.  Learning to fly a plane in the first step in forming a habit of flying.  Learning to cook is going to give you the mental effort needed to cook for yourself on a daily basis.

Next, you may need to add to your tools and resources.  If you are trying to cook for yourself, but time is the limiting factor, you may need a new resources, a cook book of fast meals to cook.  If you are trying to make running a habit, but your feet hurt (physical effort), adding new running shoes (a new tool) may fix that issue.

Finally, make the habit smaller.  Can you reduce the behavior down so much that is takes minimal time, minimal money, little physical and mental effort, and fits into your current routine(s)?  If so, you will be ready to form a new habit.  Instead of trying to run for an hour, can you find 10 minutes to run?  Instead of trying to cook an entree and side dishes, can you learn to cook some eggs and then add a piece of fruit?

Motivation to do something is important.  However, motivation is fleeing and limited.  Thus, you can’t rely upon it to keep you moving forward.  You also need the ability to do something.  Develop the ability, and you are one step closer to forming a new habit.

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The topic of forming good habits is brought up in some form or fashion almost every other day.  We work close with our members to maximize a healthy lifestyle for each of them.  However, we often hear that a lack a motivation is preventing success.  When we received an email from a client last week on this very topic, with this exact excuse, we drafted our response and decided to turn it into a podcast episode.  Check that out above.

For starters, it is important to define a “habit,” and distinguish how it is different than a routine.  We talk a lot about routines on the podcast.  We’ve discussed daily routines, productivity routines, morning routine, and nightly routines.  How are routines different than habits?  For our purposes here, a habit is a single prompted action that occurs on a regular basis almost subconsciously.  A routine, is a series of actions put together with a purpose.  A routine could be made up of a two or more habits.

In his book, “Tiny Habits,” author BJ Fogg breaks down how to form habits in a manner that makes them stick for a long time.  It isn’t enough just to say you want to floss your teeth every day.  You are unlikely to stick to it and make it a habit.  Instead, Mr. Fogg says you need to change your behavior.  Behavior modification requires Motivation, Action, and a Prompt.  In other words, B=MAP.

Assuming you now what action to take, and that action is prompted, many of the questions we deal with have to do with motivation.  A lack of motivation usually stems from one of two things:  an actual lack of desire to do it, or the action seems too daunting.

When a client comes to us with a lack of motivation, we can figure out pretty quickly whether they really want to do it or not.  That simply takes a series of “why” questions to determine the purpose behind wanting to form the new habit.  Therefore, we spend most of our time figuring out what needs to be done to get the client over the “action threshold.”  That is the imaginary line over which you need to move to actually perform an action.

When the action is too daunting, the solution is the reduce the action until it is so easy to do that you can’t avoid it.  For example, let’s assume you want to do 100 pushups a day, that’s your new habit.  If you are currently doing no pushups a day, it will be almost impossible to form a habit of 100 pushups.  You are literally trying to change from 0 to 100.  Instead, reduce the number until it’s laughable if you don’t do it.  Do you think you can do 1 pushup today?  If so, great, do 1.  Is that too easy?  Then do 5 tomorrow.  If that’s no problem, keep going.  Once the daily pushups become a habit, you will naturally start doing more.

There are more factors that play into forming good long lasting habits.  We will discuss those in future posts and episodes.  Stay tuned.

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How often to you asking someone, “How are you,” and their response is, “So busy!?”  It’s like we pride ourselves on how busy we can be.  We try to fill our to do lists with as much stuff as we can.  Every hour of every day is planned, and that makes us feel like we are moving in the right direction.  How many people like that do you know?  More importantly, how many people like that are you trying to emulate?  My guess is not many.

Instead, you want to be like the person who appears to be successful even though they never seemed to . . . busy.  That’s because these people know how to be productive.

Being busy means getting as many things done as possible, whether big or small, in as little time as possible.  Often times, everything being completed is small because there is not time for the big things.

Being productive means being intentional about the tasks you complete because you know those tasks will move you forward toward a goal.

An example of this is easy.  When I used to practice the law more often, I dreaded drafting long legal documents.  In fact, I dreaded drafting just about any legal document.  The time needed was always enormous because you can’t just sit down and start writing.  You have to narrow the legal issue.  Next, do your legal research.  Then, you have to organize your research and craft your argument.  Finally, you have to draft your document in a certain format set forth by the law.  So, I used to spend tons of time on small things, like organizing and highlighting the associated case law.  Or, I might go to my colleague’s office to discuss the case.  It was all procrastination, but I felt like I was busy.  So, I was accomplishing something.

To help you avoid simply being busy, you can ask three questions:

If you can’t answer one of these three questions, you should try doing something else.  If you can answer the questions, but the answers don’t satisfy you, go do something else.  Something more productive.

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On this episode of The Stronger Revolution, we talk about the need and importance of reevaluating what you are doing to reach your goals.

In the past, I have covered how to pair your goals down into daily or weekly tasks.  It is through these tasks that we advance 1% everyday toward our goals.  However, sometimes, we need to take another look at those tasks to see if we can do something different . . . something better.

I was reminded of the importance of reevaluating recently when I hired a new business coach.  As part of my business review, we talked about content creation and advertising.  When this podcast came up, I expressed my desire to post more, and my frustration at not doing so.  My business coach made a few suggestions that involved a complete change in podcast theme.  However, during our discussion, I had a paradigm shift and realized I could combine the two ideas.  I could follow my coach’s suggestion while maintaining the theme of this podcast.  The result is more episodes, but shorter episode that are easier to prepare, easier to listen to, and possibly more applicable to the life of my listeners.

Without the chance to revaluate what I am doing through my coach, I likely would never had experienced the realization I did.  I was really focused on the big picture of this podcast and neglected to look at the small things.  This reminded me of a daily entry in the “Daily Stoic:”  Sweat the Small Things.  That doesn’t mean worry yourself to death about all of the small things you don’t control in your life.  On the contrary, it means to sweat the details of all of the small things you are doing in life.  Focus fully on what you are doing and do it with excellence.  If you do the small things with excellence, the big things will easily fall into place.

So, how do you reevaluate?  For starters, now that you are aware of the need to do so, list out the tasks you do each day or week to accomplish your goals.  Next, try to take a neutral view of that task and consider if there is a “better” way to do it. A great way to do this is to find someone else for a second opinion.  This could be a mentor, coach, friend, spouse, parent, etc.

If you are doing things every day to reach your goals, that’s fantastic.  Take time this week to reevaluate what you are doing.  There is nothing wrong with trying to find a better way to do it.

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On this episode of the Stronger Revolution, we talk about the topic of Minimalism.  During the last episode, co-host Adam brought up the topic of living below your means.  I attempted to avoid this topic for a number of reasons.  However, I ultimately gave in.

To start, we have to define what we are talking about.  Adam referred to the topic as living below your means.  I instantly thought of “minimalism.”  However, are the topics the same?  We decided that, regardless of their actual similarity, we were talking about the same concept.  By minimalism, we are talking about avoiding the influence of consumerism as a way to bring fulfillment to our life, and focusing more on what we need.

This then begs the question, how do we know what we “need?”  For that, we turn to Mavlov’s Hierarchy of Needs.  For ease of explanation, we refer in the podcast to this image:

By referring to this hierarchy, we can start at the bottom and work our way up to make sure our needs are met first, and in the proper order.  In other words, you need air, water, food, and shelter before you need to worry about personal security, proper employment, or health.

In our discussion on minimalism, we are using this hierarchy as a way to bring awareness to what we have, what we need, and what we want.  This can help us take the emotion out of our desires and fully analyze how the things in our life bring us lasting happiness and fulfillment.  Will that new coat really enhance your life?  Or, do you simply like it, despite already owning two other coats?

We are by no means saying we should never buy anything we simply “want.”  Indulgence in our wants can be a wonderful reward for hard work and a job well done.  However, when indulgence overcomes gratefulness, we believe it has gone too far.  Therefore, after considering the hierarchy of needs, reflecting on our gratefulness for all we have is a great second step.

In the end, minimalism to us isn’t about paring down your life to only what you need to basically survive.  It is more about making sure that our needs are met first.  Next, making sure that we are reflecting on what good fortunes we do have, even if very small.  This brings gratefulness into our life and helps to avoid over indulgence.  Finally, indulging in some “wants” should be enjoyed every so often, but kept to a reasonable amount.

For more information about this topic, and to hear some different examples, check out the episode in its full capacity.

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On the Stronger Revolution Podcast, we are all about moving forward.  In fact, it is in our purpose for the podcast:  always trying to be 1% better than yesterday.  In other words, always trying to move forward through the aggregation of marginal gains.  However, sometimes, it is appropriate to quit.  In this episode, Adam and I discuss scenarios where we think it is appropriate to quit.  This is not a subject to take lightly.  Quitting should be part of a long process of consideration and introspection.  Here are some instances we think quitting may be appropriate:

If and when you decide to quit, determining how to quit will be a case-by-case basis.  However, we can look at general themes.  First, you should plan to quit quietly.  Quitting will likely cause someone to suffer in some way.  For example, quitting a job will likely cause your boss some increased stress and work.  Thus, you do not need to feed into suffering by loudly moving on.  Second, being as open and clear about quitting as you can.  There is no sense in lying.  You can spare some feelings, but be as truthful as possible so everyone is on the same page.

We want everyone to live their best lives.  This means moving forward toward your goals all the time.  Sometimes, however, moving forward means quitting.  These are just a couple of instances we think quitting is appropriate.  For more discussion on the topic, check out the podcast episode.

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Let’s face it, there are times when life just seems to be against you.  Every time you seem to get ahead, life comes and knocks you down again.  When this happens, the key to success if to just keep moving forward.

Have you ever felt like you are barely treading water in life?  You get your head up and a wave comes to knocks you down.  You gather you senses and get your head back up just in time to get hit by another wave?  This is bound to happen to you at some point in your life.  By definition, this is adversity.  Some kind of obstacle that gets in your way.  However, sometimes, the adversity seems never ending.

In 2020, the World was brought to a standstill with COVID-19.  At the time I am writing this, we are still in the middle of it.  I don’t often like to write with time specific material, but the COVID-19 situation is a great example.  The pandemic brought the world to a halt.  Business were forced to close.  Some businesses were able to pivot into different services.  When counties were allowed to reopen, businesses weren’t the same.  This time was really rough for small business owners.  The hits just kept coming.  Again, while writing this, we still don’t know what the future is going to look like.

For some, this constant adversity is going to knock them down too far and they will quit.  The problem is that when you are focused on your goals, when you are trying to live through your purpose, when you are trying to be 1% better every day, you cannot let adversity get the better of you.  Giving up is the exact opposite of the Aggregation of Marginal Gains.  In order to keep from giving up, just keep going forward.

Jason Redman said it best in his book Overcome.  Get off the X.  The X is a military term that means to point of attack on the battlefield.  The one area where all fighting power is directed.  If you stay on the X, you die.  So, get off the X by any means necessary.  That should be your mindset when you hit constant adversity.  If you stay put, you will die (metaphorically of course).  So, get off the X by any means necessary.  But how?

First, refocus on your purpose, core value, and pillars of success.  When everything is going well, we can lose focus on our purpose and value.  We get caught up in the easy flow of life and take it for granted.  Therefore, when the going gets tough, you need to remember why you are doing what you are doing.  Those who quit often don’t have a good focused purpose.  Once you are refocused on your purpose, let your values drive your actions.  You know what the right thing is to do because you already took the time to establish your values.  Don’t question them, just let them guide you.

Second, focus on actionable items.  Actionable items seem obvious, but they need to be something that requires you to actually do something.  That means more than talking about strategy, or ideas, or what you plan to do.  It isn’t enough to schedule a meeting with your employees, for example.  It also isn’t enough to plan to complete tasks that end up becoming passive items, like creating a Facebook advertisement that runs while you do something else.  Actionable items need to require your full attention.  So, have the meeting, set plans, schedule the advertisement, and make sure you have another actionable tasks ready to go.

Finally, perform your actionable tasks with excellence.  If you step back for a moment, and look at those who you admire as leaders and successful people, you will see that they do what they do with excellence.  That means they put 100% focus on doing whatever the best.  When life is beating you down, it is the perfect time to invest in some continued education in your area.  That will help you remotivate you.  Additionally, extreme focus on being your best will require all of your time and attention.  Therefore, you can’t help but move forward.

Whatever you do, get off the X and KEEP MOVING FORWARD!!!

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