The Transformational Leader

On this week's mid-week episode, tune in as Adam live coaches Dave James around being and living from the heart.

Does our approach in helping others really empowers transformation?

Let's say the person we're coaching is stuck in a hole, and as leaders, we tend to provide support to them. Our initial reaction to offer help for getting them out of it would be to give them a hand to lift themselves up, provide a ladder, and so on. And it does help them to get out of the hole they're in but it doesn't actually do much good. It may help them in the short term but it doesn't make a difference in the long run. If they're stuck in the hole again, who would help them get out of it? Will they rely on someone to help them out or should they find a way to get out of it themselves?

Transformational leadership is more than helping them get out of that state. It's more about being empathetically willing to relate to their feelings struggles, being able to support them and their decisions, and simply being there with them along the way which makes it deeper to analyze and that makes transformational work more challenging to empower.

The real challenge here is how far are we willing to go to provide empathetic support to them. How long can you endure not helping them and instead be willing to be with them and stay open-hearted as they work in their process and ultimately let them discover their own journey? A transformational leader, as discussed further in this episode, requires an exceptional amount of effort to support them that will help them move forward.

Let's dive into this parable a bit more as we'll also discuss why our job as transformational coaches should be less and less rather than serving our clients more and what makes transformative leadership and coaching distinct from any other relationship.

On this week's mid-week episode, tune in as Adam discusses topics such as Costa Rica and the Retreat, The Pillars of an Extraordinary Life, Creating Love, Joy and Trust, Meditation and Other Tools of the Ego, and Cleaning Up vs. Apologizing.

Can changing your perspective really change your reality?

The concept of transformation has taken over this era of humanity. From appearance, social status, intelligence, net worth, skill and many more aspects in life, people strive for this fulfilling phenomena. It's more than just breaking free from the shadows of the past. As difficult as it sounds, it is actually in arms reach. It comes from within, better said. Transformation happens naturally, albeit rather being foreign in itself. Many have comprehended it. Maintaining the change is another story.

People have been talking about this pretty much everywhere. Beginning transformation entails a whole lot of self-discernment. The dated conditioning of our generation has gotten us into rabbit holes of infinite beliefs. What happens when we're rid of the ones that we grew up with? How are we supposed to know what we don't know about?

Life reveals these lessons in the most peculiar yet invigorating of ways. To truly learn them creates a leader out of ordinary individuals. A leader does not follow. A leader creates his or her own path. Afterall, every one of us have different destinations. Existing is not automatic nor linear. It's complex and will take a whole lot more than staying stuck in the same state to survive it. Hence, there is growth, evolution and even revolution. Human beings all look at life differently. Some are satisfied with their perception. Others doubt it, but to achieve transformation, one must become free from it.

Tune in to this episode to find out the importance of breaking loose from these limiting beliefs and being able to spot them in the first place. The parable portrayed in the discussion resonates to the common man's breakdown before the breakthrough.

Can a get-away to a tropical forest make a big difference in our lives in civilization?

This change of scenery may sound like a simple vacation. Although, it holds more than the concept of escaping our concrete jungles. As an evolving species, we experience more adverse challenges, more short-term seasons in our lives and maybe even harder problems in this generation. We deal with a tremendous amount of anxiety. Distractions come at us left and right, considering the ever-growing dawn of technology. This even supports new lifestyles. We've been living at quite a fast pace these past couple of years, to be specific. The pandemic has driven humanity to make the most of life when we're not hiding from a virus. Statistically, most of society has succumbed to the overwhelming digital age. Everyone has phones, meetings, projects and just a lot of work to do in general.

These keep us occupied and always thinking one step ahead, but the question is: what keeps us grounded? What sets us apart from the reality that we only have because the world is changing? What stays the same when humanity has come up with its own universe on Earth?

Finding that sweet spot amid global, community and personal problems can feel transformational all in itself. In its basic definition, to "retreat", we must go back. We must retrace who we are underneath those layers of cultural and societal conditioning. The heart of the work, as further discussed in this episode, is the art of walking with you in that retreat. It entails walking together, participants and leaders manifesting deep work alike; and what better bandwidth than in the company of nature and the presence of real people with real stories to tell.

In this episode, let us go over the intricacies of this life-changing work, its essence, and the impact that it has on those who part-take and come out truly transformed to an ontological level.

Are you better at working in teams or working on your own?

I'm sure you'd agree that when you work alone, you tend to become obsessed with planning everything beforehand. And that leaves you constantly perfecting yourself; and before you know it, you have let time pass you by without actually working on your project. Our ego works that way. It makes us think we need to wrap up and take care of everything we have to take care of before we can move forward. And it just holds us right there in that same spot, always trying to get our momentum going before we set out. Group work, on the other hand, provides more opportunities to get us going and get support to go ahead and do your work. It's kind of like peer pressure; you see the others taking action and that spur you to do the same, and you just set out to keep up with the others. It knocks you out of your reverie a little bit.

As you can see, one-on-one work can provide a lot more depth, and you can go much deeper into whatever is showing up for you. Whereas in group work, you get the opportunity of the breadth, the range of possibilities are available and that in itself can kind of spur you on.

The challenge, however, is that your ego is going to try to grab a hold of whatever's happening in the group, and then use it for its own nefarious purposes, which ultimately are to keep you safe from being confronted by your fear. And although groups can really open up new opportunities for you and spur you forward, it can also provide a bit of a dangerous opportunity for some kind of justifying actions you mimic from the group.

Now, if you're in charge of this group, what should you do to lead it transformationally?

Let's delve into this topic a bit more deeply by focusing on some of the differences between individual vs. group work and why you may choose one approach over another in some situations.

If previous experience has taught us anything, it's that it's always a good idea to set boundaries, right? But when we set boundaries, does it mean we need to agree to the people around us to respect every boundary we set, and if those boundaries were crossed, they should deal with any consequence?

Many people have this kind of expectation that when they set boundaries, people will naturally be aware of them. Some people set boundaries without communicating them and get upset when these boundaries are crossed…as if people are mind readers and know what we exactly like and dislike. Here's the thing, when you set boundaries, you need to communicate them and make people clear about it.

But do people necessarily need to agree with you once these set boundaries are cast in the air? What about our non-vocalized or non-distinguished boundaries? How do we make people aware of them…or when someone does something that leaves us hurt, and we create a brand new boundary?

What if people don't honor them?

Does this also bother you? If so, then this episode is for you!

On this week's mid-week episode, tune in as Adam discusses topics such as when doing the work becomes your blind spot, advice, teaching, helping vs. coaching and leading, the being of Connection — it's shadows, breakthroughs and experience of life, developing boundaries and more!

Have you ever stopped to think about the kind of impact you give as a leader? How often do you look around and ask yourself how your actions affect people? Do you own the responsibility for their issues, or do you just play the victim and blame others for your actions? And when people give you feedback, are you willing to hear about the impact you're having on them?

The choices we make as leaders have an impact on those around us. If we're not willing to hear about that impact, how will we ever learn from our mistakes? Ownership is when we stop acting blind to our impact so that people can be actually able to communicate with us. It's the willingness to hear about how the way we showed up landed with them. It's when we acknowledge our impact and make no exception or excuses.

Being a responsible leader is awesome. But what happens when you stop there? Is leadership just about owning up to everything? Well, is it even enough? Where does that leave us?

Let's get to the bottom of it, so tune in whenever you're ready!

On this week's mid-week episode, tune in as Adam discusses topics such as Money, Being a clearing, Being true to thyself, Typing systems, Giving feedback, and advice.