What happens when the person you were certain would always love you becomes the reason you start questioning whether you were ever loved at all?

After being knocked down by something I wasn't prepared for, I disappeared for a couple of weeks. I stopped creating. I isolated. I slept. and somewhere in the middle of all that pain, one question- "Did I ever matter to her?"- turned into something much darker. "What if I don't matter at all?"

In this episode, I talk about abandonment, intrusive thoughts, depression, and what happens when you stop trusting your own ability to know when you're loved. I'm not sharing this from the other side with everything figured out. I'm still finding my way back.

Because maybe healing isn't about never getting knocked down again. Maybe it's about learning not to abandon yourself when you do.

This is me turning the microphone back on.

Follow me on my socials! @naviemaris

Email: [email protected]

One minute I love you. The next, I want to disappear from you. If you've ever experienced that emotional whiplash, or been on the receiving end of it, you know how confusing and painful it can be.

In this episode of The Unburied Collective, I'm talking about splitting: one of the most misunderstood symptoms associated with Borderline Personality Disorder. I break down what splitting actually is, why it happens, what it feels like from the inside, and why it's so much more than simply "Changing your mind"

I'll share my own experiences with splitting, the shame that often follows it, how trauma shapes the way our brains try to protect us, and why this symptom is one of the biggest reasons BPD is so heavily stigmatized. We'll also talk about how splitting can affect relationships, how it impacts the person experiencing it, and why healing isn't about pretending those feelings don't exist, it's about learning to understand them before they take control.

As always, I'm not a therapist. Everything I share comes from my own lived experience, the research I've done, and what I've learned throughout my healing journey.

Whether you live with BPD, love someone who does, or simply want to understand the disorder beyond the stereotypes, I hope this episode helps you feel a little less alone, and a little more understood.

One minute I love you. The next, I want to disappear from you. If you've ever experienced that emotional whiplash, or been on the receiving end of it, you know how confusing and painful it can be.

In this episode of The Unburied Collective, I'm talking about splitting: one of the most misunderstood symptoms associated with Borderline Personality Disorder. I break down what splitting actually is, why it happens, what it feels like from the inside, and why it's so much more than simply "changing your mind."

I'll share my own experiences with splitting, the shame that often follows it, how trauma shapes the way our brains try to protect us, and why this symptom is one of the biggest reasons BPD is so heavily stigmatized. We'll also talk about how splitting can affect relationships, how it impacts the person experiencing it, and why healing isn't about pretending those feelings don't exist. It's about learning to understand them before they take control.

As always, I'm not a therapist. Everything I share comes from my own lived experience, the research I've done, and what I've learned throughout my healing journey.

Whether you live with BPD, love someone who does, or simply want to understand the disorder beyond the stereotypes, I hope this episode helps you feel a little less alone, and a little more understood.

In this episode of The Unburied Collective, Navie explores the painful line between loyalty and self-abandonment. What happens when staying becomes a betrayal to yourself? Through personal stories, reflections on healing, and honest conversation about trauma, grief, and relationships, this episode examines why so many of us hold on to people who continue to hurt us. And what it takes to finally let go.

If you've ever confused endurance with love, or mistaken self-sacrifice for loyalty, this episode is for you. Healing isn't always about learning how to stay. Sometimes, it's about learning that you were never meant to abandon yourself in the first place.

You can follow me on my socials @naviemaris

People hear "Borderline Personality Disorder" and think they know what it means.

mood swings.

anger.

too emotional.

but that's not what it feels like from the inside.

In this episode, I'm sharing what living with BPD actually feels like. The fear, the shame, the overthinking, the relationships, the healing, and the things I wish someone would've explained years ago.

If you've ever felt like your emotions were louder than everyone else's, this episode is for you.

What if healing isn't supposed to feel the way we thought it would?

For the longest time, I believed that if I was still hurting, I must not be healing. I thought progress would look like waking up one day feeling "fixed."

Instead, it looked like setting boundaries that broke my heart, grieving people who were still alive, celebrating quiet victories no one else could see, and learning that growth is often invisible while you're living it.

In this episode, I'm sharing the version of healing that doesn't usually make it onto social media. The messy, lonely, frustrating, and surprisingly beautiful parts. We talk about why healing can feel like grief, how our expectations can make us feel like we're failing, what it really means to rebuild trust with yourself, and why the smallest decisions often become the biggest turning points.

If you've ever wondered why you're still hurting... or questioned whether all the work you're doing is actually making a difference... this episode is for you.

You're not behind.

You're not broken.

and maybe, just maybe, you're doing better than you think.

For a long time, I thought I was healing when really I was just surviving.

In this episode, I'm talking about survival mode. The way trauma teaches us to stay busy, stay alert, stay prepared, and keep moving, even when the danger has passed. I'll share what survival mode looked like in my own life, how it protected me when I needed it, and how it slowly started costing me my joy, connection, and peace.

If you've ever felt exhausted for no obvious reason, struggled to relax, or wondered why you can't seem to enjoy the life you've worked so hard to build, this episode is for you.

Because surviving is a skill. But eventually, we deserve the chance to do more than survive.

Thank you for being here.

You can follow me on my socials @naviemaris

In this episode, I open up about my personal experience with adoption and the emotional scars that come with it. This isn’t the feel-good adoption story you’ve seen in the movies. this is the truth many adoptees live with but are told to stay silent about.

I talk about what it was like to grow up knowing I was “chosen,” but never truly feeling wanted. I explore the grief, identity confusion, and abandonment that so often get overlooked. I also share legal alternatives to adoption that preserve a child’s identity and family connection. options I wish had been considered for me.

Whether you’re an adoptee, adoptive parent, or someone who cares about the truth behind the system, this episode is for you. I hope it helps you feel seen, and more importantly, helps others understand what adoption can really feel like from the inside out.

Unmasking the Self We Hid to Survive

In this episode, I open up about the subtle, and sometimes invisible ways I learned to mask growing up. From adapting to survive unsafe spaces to shapeshifting into who I thought I needed to be, I share the versions of myself I wore like armor… and the moment I realized I didn’t know who I was underneath it all.

It wasn’t until my grandma left ,my safe person, my anchor, that the masks started to crack, and I was left staring at the fragments of an identity built on performance, perfection, and protection.

This is a conversation about the grief of losing yourself, the awakening of self-awareness, and what it looks like to begin coming home to the parts you buried to be loved.

"She didn't die, but I lost her anyway"

In the very first episode of The Unburied Collective, Navie shares the origin of her grief; the kind that doesn't come with funerals or closure. This is the beginning of a deeply personal journey through adoption trauma, emotional estrangement, and what it means to mourn someone who's still alive.

This episode sets the tone for the collective: honest, tender, unfiltered. If you've ever grieved who kept breathing, loved someone who couldn't love you back, or carried the weight of an untold story. This space is yours too.

Topics in this episode:

- Grieving a living mother

- Adoption Trauma + Identity

- Why this podcast had to be made

You are not alone here. This is the unburying.

Want to share your story on a future episode? Submit is anonymously or with your name at [email protected] because your story deserves to be heard.